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[ cheering and applause ] [ ] greg: yes! yes! yes! [ cheering and applause ] greg: all right! i agree. happy monday everybody! let s get started. donald trump has demanded a drug test for joe biden for the first debate. biden privately told if he wants my urine, he can get it from the seat cushion like everybody else. [ laughter ] a woman swam through shark infested waters in san francisco saying the sharks weren t even interested in her. [ laughter ] wow, even the sharks are gay! [ laughter ] new york city is in peak polen season. on the brighter nose it makes it tougher to smell [ bleep ]. the iran president was found dead after [ cheering ] all right! i didn t expect that. but should be grateful. dead after his helicopter crashed in a remote mountainous region. local investigators blame the weather and the jews. [ laughter ] why not? [ cheering ] greg: how about those jews? president was known as the butcher of iran. now known as the ground beef of iran. [ ....