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Transcripts For COM The Daily Show With Jon Stewart 20141126

[ dallas theme music ] captioning sponsored by Comedy Central cheers and applause from austin, texas. A city so liberal a guitar can marry a cowboy boot. Its the daily show coverage. Goes to the one part of texas where we wont get shot at. [ applause ] p jon thank you thank you so much welcome to the show thank you so much. Wow, what an honor to be here in austin, texas only open carry ebola state in the union. We are thrilled to be here in austin. We have a nice week planned. The midterm elections, wendy davis is here. [ cheering and applause ] really the big story in the country continues its perverse obsession with a virus that none of us who has not had direct contact with an ebola patient has gotten. Our coverage starts with samantha bee where it all started in dallas, texas. [ cheering and applause ] i got to ask you, currently theres no active ebola cases, how did dallas finally get on top of things . Well, jon, dallas officials tried every texas solution they could think of. Th

Transcripts For COM The Colbert Report 20141219

Which, of course, is black History Month but did you know that its also childrens dental health month . laughter that means its an important month for African Americans. Children with teeth. But especially African American children with teeth. cheers and applause the point is, kids, great African American leaders like rosa parks and Martin Luther king want you to floss. laughter okay . Thats what they fought for. And thanks to their sacrifice, you can floss on any seat in the bus you choose. Because theres only one thing worse than racism and thats racism with gingivitis. laughter yet another camera, yet another emotional state. Nation, my blood is boiling. And it better stop soon because i like my veins al dente. laughter folks, baseless attacks continue to be levied against Chris Christie, my personal friend that i look forward to meeting one day. laughter the governor put the bridge gate nonscandal to bet weeks ago. Well, guess what . Somebody woke it up, folks, and its cranky as he

Transcripts For COM The Colbert Report 20141127

Captioning sponsored by Comedy Central captioned by Media Access Group at wgbh captioning sponsored by Comedy Central [crowd cheering] [crowd chanting] stephen welcome to the report everybody. Thank you so for joining us. Thanks, everybody. [crowd cheering] thanks for being here. Thank you. Thank you in here out there all around the world, mr. And mrs. America. I want to thank you folks. I want to thank you folk for joining us on this, on this what i believe is the last day of america. [laughter] this is it, nation. No, no, this is it, date we all feared would come, ever since we were told it would come several months ago has come at last. [laughter] because tonight at 8 00 pm mexican standard time. Generalissimo obama announced his unilateral plan to allow four million Illegal Immigrants to remain in america without fear of deportation. It turns out this whole time weve been building that wall to keep them in. [laughter] [applause] submitted for your approval. [laughter] i do not smok

Falcata area of ​​Messina, this is an eco-monster Do we want to finally demolish it?

Falcata area of ​​Messina, this is an eco-monster Do we want to finally demolish it?
odnako.org - get the latest breaking news, showbiz & celebrity photos, sport news & rumours, viral videos and top stories from odnako.org Daily Mail and Mail on Sunday newspapers.

Port System Authority of Messina, Floridia (M5S) thanks and praises Mega: With you in excellent hands

Port System Authority of Messina, Floridia (M5S) thanks and praises Mega: With you in excellent hands
odnako.org - get the latest breaking news, showbiz & celebrity photos, sport news & rumours, viral videos and top stories from odnako.org Daily Mail and Mail on Sunday newspapers.

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