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Dear Your Worship As a one-man pantomime swan act, I implore you to settle this question once and for all. Are pantomime swans required to conform to the same Equity regulations as pantomime horses? I mean, does there have to be one small actor in the front and another one in the back? I enclose a publicity shot of me in my one-man-operated swan costume, described by Stage magazine as “more swan-like than the real thing”. However thanks to intense union pressure, I now find myself effectively blacklisted in the pantomime swan community. Melvin Twollet, Hartlepool THE VERDICT: I am sorry to hear of your current employment difficulties, but as a matter of health and safety, Equity rule 2177114b specifies plainly that there should

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