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Transcripts For COM The Colbert Report 20120725



do-be-do do-be-do-do-do happy day so happy and joyful heaven and 30 rock stephen: tonight, fox news takes it to the next level. now they re fair, balanced and blazing buffalo. then, has partisanship gone too far? or should both sides come together to hate a third side? (laughter) and my guest, documentary filmmaker vikram gandhi got people to believe he was a prophet. big deal: i do that every night. (laughter) it s national vanilla ice cream day and if romney is elected it will go on for four more years. (laughter) this is the colbert report. captioning sponsored by comedy central ( theme song playing ) ( cheers and applause ) (cheers and applause) (audience chanting stephen ) stephen: i like it! (cheers and applause) stephen: welcome to the report, everybody. good to have you with us. please have a seat. folks, i have to tell you, after a greeting like that i just wish it was legal to grind you up and snort you. (laughter) before we begin right off the top ....

Ali Kash , Vikram Gandhi , Kumar Ray ,

Transcripts For COM The Colbert Report 20120724



(laughter) this is the colbert report. captioning sponsored by comedy central ( theme song playing ) ( cheers and applause ) (cheers and applause) (audience chanting stephen ) stephen: i like it! (cheers and applause) stephen: welcome to the report, everybody. good to have you with us. please have a seat. folks, i have to tell you, after a greeting like that i just wish it was legal to grind you up and snort you. (laughter) before we begin right off the top i want to thank my guest vikram gandhi for being here tonight. he s starring in the new documentary kumare: the true story of a flase prophet. he s already one of my favorite guests because he showed up. (laughter) unlike mike tyson who was supposed to be here to talk about his one-man broadway show but canceled this morning because and i want to make sure i get this right he is a huge pussy. (laughter) (cheers and applause) that s right. i challenge mike tyson to an interview and he forfeited because h ....

Ali Kash , Vikram Gandhi , Kumar Ray ,

Transcripts For COM The Colbert Report 20120724



stephen: welcome to the report, everybody. good to have you with us. please have a seat. folks, i have to tell you, after a greeting like that i just wish it was legal to grind you up and snort you. (laughter) before we begin right off the top i want to thank my guest vikram gandhi for being here tonight. he s starring in the new documentary kumare: the true story of a flase prophet. he s already one of my favorite guests because he showed up. (laughter) unlike mike tyson who was supposed to be here to talk about his one-man broadway show but canceled this morning because and i want to make sure i get this right he is a huge pussy. (laughter) (cheers and applause) that s right. i challenge mike tyson to an interview and he forfeited because he s too scared to face me i get it. i ve only got one good ear, and that takes away your best move. (laughter) so nation, i believe this knockout ka-pang by know show now makes me officially the reverend sir dr. steven p. m ....

United States , Ali Kash , Brian Ross , Vikram Gandhi , Kumar Ray , Jim Holmes ,