[cheers and applause] greg: yes! happy monday, more like happy fun day. i just invented that word. so friday the daily caller obtained video of an employee having anal sex inside a judiciary committee hearing room. oh, applause, thank you. pro anal sex in the senate judiciary room audience. we don t have access to the video so we had gene one of our producers sketch a screen grab. there you go. yeah, talk about yielding the floor to the next gentlemen. after the story broke democrat senator ben cardin s office released this statement quote, aidan may is no longer employed by the us senate. good thing his id badge had the picture of the back of his head. security forces tell fox news that capitol police are taking the matter seriously and charges haven t been ruled out. now, either this was a rare event or maybe this career s secret santa gift exchange got way out of hand. but where else can you get paid to have sex in the workplace with a free colonoscopy? only in dc are th
i call it, everybody run! it s the attack on brass. why are the democrats so evil? [laughter] [cheers and applause] greg: you know, sometimes i think he takes my direction too literally. i said, you know, it s about attacking children and he goes the attack on brats. like a 1950s horror movie about sausage. tonight i dedicate my monologue to the next generation because someone s got to look out for them t democrats certainly aren t. fact is we re in a cultural war and the kids are caught in the cross fire literally if they re in chicago or baltimore or dc. if the mayor stands for d after their name it stands for duck. post covid there s a new pandemic out there kids killing kids. according to the wall street journal violence among kids has soared since 2020, it s a stain on this country spreading faster than the one on joe biden s pants. homicides by juveniles acting alone rose 30% in 2020 from a year earlier, while those committed by multiple kids were up 66%. and murders
jealous. last week we did a story on sinner macy gray s interview with morgan where he asked her if he could define a woman. a human being that scott moves yeah, the dictionary is quite broad. i will say this and everybody s going to hate me but as a woman. greg: someone paid attention in medical school. as you can be a supreme court justice. on our show, i asked this question. either one of these has to apologize for being insensitive to marginalized groups. you got the answer. just 48 hours, roughly the same amount of time i spend on my biceps every week, asked again what is a woman and she folded faster than a futon shared by the view. being a woman is a vibe. if you in your heart is that s what you are, that s what you are regardless of what anybody says or thinks. greg: suddenly doesn t exist anymore and that s not a world i want to live in. i just don t, i don t, i m out. find a replacement. just not rob long. to be a woman is a vibe, of course they re g
all right. yes, yes, i know. i know. i would feel the same way if i were you. all right, let s get started. according to storm.get stard. y daniels husband, the couple will leave the united states. trump wins the trial. so wait a second. she has a husband. upplen that s like finding outes the easter bunny has syphilis. oh, my god. what if somebody have syphilis in here? i m sorry i offended you. and get this. her husband s a star, too. i wonder, do they talk shop at home? i bet he complains when he doesn t have. a hard day at work. wow. i m not jim gaffigan. this is going to be is it goingy to be clean comedy? so they re actually going to be leaving the united states,he which means stormy is going to enter another country as opposedited stamean to anotht entering her. sorry. o donn rosie o donnell reportedly sent a text to michael cohen , breathe, relax, tell, tell the truth. thu got. i love you.ate that s the same advice she gives herself when strapping on the fe
i m dana perino along with judge jeanine pirro, marie hart, jesse watters, and greg gutfeld. it s 5:00 in new york city, and this is the five. i think it was a very interesting day, it was a fascinating day. and it shows what a scam this whole thing is. dana: donald trump sounding off after another breathtaking day in court. michael cohen cornered into a potential ally in the most dramatic moment of the hush money trial so far. the jury and the media left in total shock as they heard a key piece of cross-examination. from his lawyer accusing cohen of lying about a crucial phone call that is supposed to directly link donald trump to the stormy payment. blanche drawing the courts attention to text messages between michael cohen and keith schiller, donald trump s former bodyguard. and on october 24th, 2016, cohen text schiller about harassing phone calls he was getting from an alleged 14-year-old prankster to which schiller responded, call me. that phone call lasting j