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WJLA Jimmy Kimmel Live December 23, 2016

Thanksgiving break. Is it safe to still be eating turkey 11 days after thanksgiving . [ laughter ] a lot of things happened to me over the last two weeks. I got a tummy tuck, they still give those. I had my eyes done. And i think they look great, right . I also went to drybar, i got an updo, i had my whole body done. I read online in february ill be hosting the oscars. [ cheers and applause ] jimmy very nice. Thanks for the music. You know, the producers and the academy went through a long list of names and they decided that since im already right across the street from where they do the show, i was the closest person to host. [ laughter ] so i guess i have to get a tux now . Or maybe ill wear jean shorts, has anyone done that . We have to shake thins up a little. Im going to need you to help me with this. Guillermo sure, jimmy. Jimmy marijuana will be legal for Recreational Use in february, i wonder maybe you can pass some of t ....

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WPVI Jimmy Kimmel Live December 23, 2016

Thanksgiving break. Is it safe to still be eating turkey 11 days after thanksgiving . [ laughter ] a lot of things happened to me over the last two weeks. I got a tummy tuck, they still give those. I had my eyes done. And i think they look great, right . I also went to drybar, i got an updo, i had my whole body done. I read online in february ill be hosting the oscars. [ cheers and applause ] jimmy very nice. Thanks for the music. You know, the producers and the academy went through a long list of names and they decided that since im already right across the street from where they do the show, i was the closest person to host. [ laughter ] so i guess i have to get a tux now . Or maybe ill wear jean shorts, has anyone done that . We have to shake thins up a little. Im going to need you to help me with this. Guillermo sure, jimmy. Jimmy marijuana will be legal for Recreational Use in february, i wonder maybe you can pass some of t ....

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KGO Jimmy Kimmel Live December 31, 2016

Very kind. Hey, are any of you finished with your Holiday Shopping yet . Are you done . [ cheers and applause ] really . That many people . Its very sick people, you should be institutionalized, youre done already . If youre not finished and looking for an unusual idea, something special, this is a real item at nordstrom right now. This is what they call a medium Leather Wrapped stone. [ laughter ] its a rock. For 85. Its an 85dollar rock. Which is reasonable if you have no idea what money is worth. But not only that, theres a small size leatherwrapped stone for 65. Which if youre a loser who cant afford the medium, you might want to pick up. Theres no large. No size large. The medium, there shouldnt be a medium, there is no medium. Theres nothing between. Lets look at that again. It looks like a baked potato in leather pants. [ laughter ] if you buy this, just go ahead an ....

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WPVI Jimmy Kimmel Live December 31, 2016

With your Holiday Shopping yet . Are you done . [ cheers and applause ] really . That many people . Its very sick people, you should be institutionalized, youre done already . If youre not finished and looking for an unusual idea, something special, this is a real item at nordstrom right now. This is what they call a medium Leather Wrapped stone. [ laughter ] its a rock. For 85. Its an 85dollar rock. Which is reasonable if you have no idea what money is worth. But not only that, theres a small size leatherwrapped stone for 65. Which if youre a loser who cant afford the medium, you might want to pick up. Theres no large. No size large. The medium, there shouldnt be a medium, there is no medium. Theres nothing between. Lets look at that again. It looks like a baked potato in leather pants. [ laughter ] if you buy this, just go ahead and hit yourself in the head with it. How ....

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KGO Jimmy Kimmel Live December 6, 2016

I needed that because we are back to work from a long thanksgiving break. Is it safe to still be eating turkey 11 days after thanksgiving . [ laughter ] a lot of things happened to me over the last two weeks. I got a tummy tuck, they still give those. I had my eyes done. And i think they look great, right . I also went todrybar, i got an updo, i had my whole body done. I read online in february ill be hosting the oscars. [ cheers and applause ] jimmy very nice. Thanks for the music. You know, the producers and the academy went through a long list of names and they decided that since im already right across the street from where they do the show, i was the closest person to host. [ laughter ] so i guess i have to get a tux now . Or maybe ill wear jean shorts, has anyone done that . We have to shake thins up a little. Im going to need you to help me with this. Guillermo sure, jimmy. Jimmy marijuana will be legal for recreation at use in february, i wonder maybe you can pass some of that ....

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