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Dear Agony Akka, I am in a holy mess. Let me start from the beginning. On April 12, I had the divine fortune of visiting Haridwar and taking a dip in the slightly turgid ambrosia that is the Ganga. Yes, I was part of three million lucky souls who washed away their sins at the Kumbh Mela. And there was a bonus. Rose petals came showering down from the sky, delivered from a helicopter that emerged like a pushpaka vimana. One petal landed on my nose and I ate it as prashad for good measure. But the unfathomable has happened. Instead of making me invincible, at the end of the mela, I began to hack and cough. Now I have been diagnosed with COVID. I know god works in mysterious ways, but this seems very unfair. How do I explain this curse? ....