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BBCNEWS HARDtalk June 4, 2024 03:30:00

You would always call a forced marriage. yeah. and in her 20s, deeply unhappy, she took her own life. she did. voice-over: this is bbc news. if you remember, i was still disowned by my family then, we ll have the headlines so my family never for you at the top of the hour, spoke to me again. which is straight and my sister was very unhappy after this programme. in her marriage and went for help to members of the community, religious leaders also, and family members, and they sent her back and told her it was her duty welcome to hardtalk, i m stephen sackur. to make the marriage work. how does a society protect she tragically set herself those most vulnerable, on fire and she died, particularly children, and i felt that somewhere, from exploitation and abuse? because of that experience, having the right laws my mother would say, in place is of course vital, come back, you know. but so is having institutions and professions that we forgive you. are open and accountable. how easy is t ....

Voice Over , Bbc News , Family Members , Marriage Work , Stephen Sackur , Way To Go , Jasvinder Sanghera , Church Of England , Abuse Survivors , This Doesn T Change , You Mustn T ,

BBCNEWS HARDtalk June 4, 2024 22:36:00

And thought, i could have handled it differently ? absolutely not, because from the age of 16 and leaving, for the next 16 to 20 years old, i begged for their forgiveness, as if i had done something wrong. it took my sister s suicide to realise that, actually, i was the victim, not the perpetrator. the point is this. just. let me stop you for a second, cos what you ve just said is shocking. i believe she was called robina, your sister. she was, yeah. she, unlike you, agreed to go ahead with what i think you would always call a forced marriage. yeah. and in her 20s, deeply unhappy, she took her own life. she did. if you remember, i was still disowned by my family then, so my family never spoke to me again. and my sister was very unhappy in her marriage and went for help to members of the community, religious leaders also, and family members, ....

Family Members ,

BBCNEWS HARDtalk June 4, 2024 22:37:00

And they sent her back and told her it was her duty to make the marriage work. she tragically set herself on fire and she died, and i felt that somewhere, because of that experience, my mother would say, come back, you know. we forgive you. not that i needed forgiving. you know, i was asserting myself, in terms of not wanting to marry a stranger. but she actually made the point, this doesn t change anything. you know, you cannot come back, even though robina died in this way . you mustn t show your face at the funeral, etc, which is why i set up the charity karma nirvana, so i could speak out. and interesting that you do hold your mother, of all family members, primarily responsible for inculcating this particular sort of atmosphere and practice and behaviour in your family. you say, i m ashamed to say that women do uphold these so called honour systems. they are the gatekeepers of abuse. do you think the work you ve ....

Marriage Work , This Doesn T Change , Way To Go , Family Members , Charity Karma Nirvana , You Mustn T , Honour Systems ,

BBCNEWS HARDtalk June 4, 2024 03:36:00

And my sister was very unhappy in her marriage and went for help to members of the community, religious leaders also, and family members, and they sent her back and told her it was her duty to make the marriage work. she tragically set herself on fire and she died, and i felt that somewhere, because of that experience, my mother would say, come back, you know. we forgive you. not that i needed forgiving. you know, i was asserting myself, in terms of not wanting to marry a stranger. but she actually made the point, this doesn t change anything. you know, you cannot come back, even though robina died in this way. you mustn t show your face at the funeral, etc, which is why i set up the charity karma nirvana, so i could speak out. and interesting that you do hold your mother, of all family members, primarily responsible for inculcating this particular sort of atmosphere and practice and behaviour in your family. you say, i m ashamed to say that women do uphold these so called ....

Family Members , Marriage Work , Way To Go , Charity Karma Nirvana , You Mustn T , Doesn T Change Anything , Honour Systems ,

BBCNEWS HARDtalk June 4, 2024 03:35:00

Particularly your mother, forever. mmm. is there any time in your life when you ve looked back and thought, i could have handled it differently ? absolutely not, because from the age of 16 and leaving, for the next 16 to 20 years old, i begged for their forgiveness, as if i had done something wrong. it took my sister s suicide to realise that, actually, i was the victim, not the perpetrator. the point is this. just. let me stop you for a second, cos what you ve just said is shocking. i believe she was called robina, your sister. she was, yeah. she, unlike you, agreed to go ahead with what i think you would always call a forced marriage. yeah. and in her 20s, deeply unhappy, she took her own life. she did. if you remember, i was still disowned by my family then, so my family never spoke to me again. ....