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COM The Colbert Report December 14, 2012

Captioning sponsored by Comedy Central theme song playing cheers and applause stephen, stephen, stephen thank you, thank you ladies and gentlemen. I got to tell you. That is so beautiful. That is so beautiful. I will take that sound. I will take that sound over jingle bells any day. Nation, tonight is my last episode before three weeks off. But im not looking ahead to the break. Ive already started. cheers and applause that is not a prop. Whooo there are still some important stories to talk about there, folks. Like last nights megaconcert to help the victims of Hurricane Sandy. All eyes were on new york city last night for the 121212 benefit show to help victims of superstorm sandy. Paul mccartney, the rolling stones, eric clapton, Bruce Springsteen and billy joel were among all the rock n roll heroes that came out t ....

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COM The Colbert Report January 8, 2013

Three items off their 50 item menu and no one will give a [bleep]. Finally, i struggle with how to say goodbye to my friends. I saw a clip and i knew that was the one. Enjoy. [laughter] something to a few wellplaced ba bandages wouldnt fix and i promised myself i wouldnt cry. I was captioning sponsored by Comedy Central theme song playing cheers and applause stephen, stephen, stephen thank you, thank you ladies and gentlemen. I got to tell you. That is so beautiful. That is so beautiful. I will take that sound. I will take that sound over jingle bells any day. Nation, tonight is my last episode before three weeks off. But im not looking ahead to the break. Ive already started. cheers and applause that is not a prop. Whooo there are still some important stories to talk about there, folks. Like last nights megaconcert to help the victims of Hurricane Sandy. All eyes were on ne ....

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COM The Daily Show With Jon Stewart January 7, 2013

Jon so it will be settled. I mean who argues about abortion any more. laughter remember those days . Today . This afternoon . laughter im sure the opponents will figure out Something Like sure, you can get gay married but first one of you has to have a transvaginal ultrasound. One of you does have a vaginal we can trans, dont you . laughter now this is very crafty case for gay marriage proponents to bring to the supreme court. As the case sets it is a bit of a trap for conservatives. The domo case considers whether someone lived with a domestic party for 35 years should have to pay estate taxes whereas had they been parried as husband and wife she would not have to pay estate taxes. Jon theres the question, conservatives, you can eliminate the estate tax for a whole lot of people but only if you let them get gay married. laughter its a veritable reagans choice. laughter what are we going to do . applause gay marriage or double tax ....

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