i assume you know that an emergency alert went out on saturday morning. this was this missile threat inbound to hawaii. seek immediate shelter. this is not a drill. and then they didn t get a correction until 38 minutes later. so for 38 under a mai tai umbrella? [ laughter ] people were freaking out. although not as much as they would be in any other state. but the fact that it took them 38 minutes to getgets. [ laughter ] [ applause ] i have to say, i was at a walmart in maui on missile was on the way. [ laughter ] to put me out of my misery. but they don t have that level of anxiety that we do. you know, usually the hawaii emergency broadcast system is reserved your lights are on. [ laughter ] so this was scary. it was very interesting to see how people reacted to imminent death. it s rare a group [ laughter ] and you know what they did? they all got into bed together and watched cat videos on youtube. [ laughter ] [ applause ] i don t know. what are you going to do? th
weekend. i assume you know that an emergency alert went out on saturday morning. this was this text is something received by everyone with a cell phone at 8:07 a.m. on saturday. ballistic missile threat inbound to hawaii. seek immediate shelter. this is not a drill. and then they didn t get a correction until 38 minutes later. so for 38 minutes people were seeking immediate shelter, which in hawaii, what does that even mean? everybody get under a mai tai umbrella? [ laughter ] people were freaking out. although not as much as they would be in any other state. but the fact that it took them 38 minutes to get around to telling people there wasn t a ballistic missile on the way is very hawaii. it s about as hawaii as it gets. [ laughter ] [ applause ] i have to say, i was at a walmart in maui once. i stood in line for 43 minutes with two people in front of me. it got to the point where i was hoping a ballistic missile was on the way. [ laughter ] to put me out of my misery.
that s when you know you re having a party, right? you know who you are, right? yeah, yeah, yeah. well, you got the fanny packs and the croakies too, that s a good combination. where are you from? brooklyn, new york? there you go, that s right. [ cheers and applause ] that s what we re like. well, welcome to the show. thank you. we have a lot to get to starting with united airlines. what a week for united airlines. [ audience booing ] did they do something wrong? [ laughter ] that video of the doctor being dragged off the plane and then the airline s response to i it has turned into an absolute nightmare from a pr standpoint. even pepsi was like, i wouldn t want to be you guys this week. and not only are they taking a publicity hit, they took an economic hit too. united stock went way down today. the company lost $255 million in market value in one day. [ cheers and applause ] means nothing, really. which means they could have given each of those four passengers they kicked o