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Transcripts For KYW The Late Show With Stephen Colbert 20171004

Much whats going on . Hey, everybody whats going on. Hi, paul. Hi, matt, whats going on. I like it. I like your jackson pollock. Audience Stephen Stephen stephen. Stephen hey, thanks, everybody. Welcome to the late show, ladies and gentlemen. cheers and applause thats very nice. Ladies and gentlemen, please, have a seat, everybody. Youre too kind. Thanks very much. Well, ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the late show. Im your host, Stephen Colbert. Well today. cheers and applause today, its 13 days after hurricane maria, yet another disaster struck puerto rico donald trump visited the island. laughter but before the president left for sant juan, he gave this objective assessment of his administrations Disaster Relief efforts. In texas and in florida, we get an aplus, and ill tell you what, i think weve done just as go ....

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Transcripts For KPIX The Late Show With Stephen Colbert 20171004

Much whats going on . Hey, everybody whats going on. Hi, paul. Hi, matt, whats going on. I like it. I like your jackson pollock. Audience Stephen Stephen stephen. Stephen hey, thanks, everybody. Welcome to the late show, ladies and gentlemen. cheers and applause thats very nice. Ladies and gentlemen, please, have a seat, everybody. Youre too kind. Thanks very much. Well, ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the late show. Im your host, Stephen Colbert. Well today. cheers and applause today, its 13 days after hurricane maria, yet another disaster struck puerto rico donald trump visited the island. laughter but before the president left for sant juan, he gave this objective assessment of his administrations Disaster Relief efforts. In texas and in florida, we get an aplus, and ill tell you what, i think weve done just as go ....

Puerto Rico , United States , T Ai Pei , Marshall Islands , John Oliver , Glenn Gordon Cameron , Sant Juan , Jon Batiste , Dorothy Hamill , Michael Weatherly , Stephen Colbert , Yale Stephen , Ben Schwartz , Tony Hale , Las Vegas , Al Yanukovych , Nick Kroll Wason , Toit Stephen , Paul Weller , Weatherly Natasha , Johnson Heineken , Jackson Pollock , Stephen Stephen , Donald Trump , Disaster Relief , Trump Just ,

Transcripts For COM The Colbert Report 20130730

Thats our show. Thank you very much for watching. I want to thank our Live Audience here tonight as well who likes a joke but werent so sure about a weiner joke. Im working with a high level of audience. Please join us tomorrow tomorrow night. Here it is, your moment of zen. Anthony weiner, carlos danger will withdraw from the mayoral election. Farewell, carlos. Hes a goner. Bye, captioning sponsored by Comedy Central captioned by Media Access Group at wgbh access. Wgbh. Org stephen tonight a new way to stop obamacare. Instead of calling them death panels, how about murder councils . Then a new victory for gun rights. I wonder what i should shoot in the air to celebrate. Plus my guest rock folkers the lumineers are here because of the rerelease of their first album although if you ask me their earlier stuff is much be ....

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Transcripts For COM The Colbert Report 20130731

Random videos of me naked. Im naked. Check. I just dont get it. But hey im only 7. Thanks for watch. Now get out of my room. I thought you were going to play with me. Not you. The audience. See im adam. Listen here, you little mother. Nothing would brighten my day more than to destroy some wimp who still plays with dolls. How about this . How about i date your mom and make your bedtime two hours earlier, you no talent piece of crap. Keep it up with the insults and there will be no wes. 8. Do you get what i am saying, bitch . I will bury you and your sister in the sandbox. Do not test me. Your move, four eyes. Goodnight. Stephen tonight a new way to stop obamacare. Instead of calling them death panels, how about murder councils . Then a new victory for gun rights. I wonder what i should shoot in the air to celebrate. Plus my guest rock folkers the lumineers are here because of the rerelease of their first album although if you ask me their earlier stuff is much better. China is launchin ....

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Transcripts For COM The Colbert Report 20130730

Stephen tonight a new way to stop obamacare. Instead of calling them death panels, how about murder councils . Then a new victory for gun rights. I wonder what i should shoot in the air to celebrate. Plus my guest rock folkers the lumineers are here because of the rerelease of their first album although if you ask me their earlier stuff is much better. China is launching a 24hour pandacam. Oh, i cant wait to see those majestic creatures assemble an ipad. This is the colbert report. Captioning sponsored by Comedy Central [ cheers and applause ] stephen welcome to the report. Good to have you with us. Thanks. Stephen, stephen, stephen tephen thank you, ladies and gentlemen, thank you so much. Nation, nation, i hope youre ready because you have to lock your lungs and batten down your colon because obamacare is coming. The individual mandate takes effect on new years day which means when the times square ball drops, it will immediatel ....

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