greg: thank you! all right! yeah! let s start! wow. that was amazing. [laughter] i wish i smoked. it s friday, so you know what that means. let s welcome tonight s guests. you may recognize him from his feature in average white guy magazine, cohost of fox & friends first, todd piro. [applause] as former miss citrus, she comes freshly squeezed. host of the morgan ortagus show on sirius xm, morgan ortagus! [applause] it s been 12 years since she tested positive for food. new york times best-selling author and fox news contributor, kat timpf! [applause] and the great barrier reef is his loofah. new york times best-selling author, comedian, world champion, tyrus! [applause] before we get to some news stories, let s do this. announcer: greg s leftovers! greg: it s leftovers, where i read the jokes we didn t use this week. as always, it s my first time reading them, so if they suck, we will put joe mackey in a meat grinder and turn them into hot dogs. [laugh
and he wanted to show everybody. kat: what are you looking at? greg: it seems like he s auditioning for one of todd s movies. [laughter and applause] todd: that was chris ful fulton. greg: there is a name for that. morgan? morgan: i saw a video of these cute darling little pony, and he or she looks like they are getting their confidence to jump my daughter loves horses. she rides a little pony named chief s of this made me think of her. this also made me think of joe biden. [laughter] it s very cute but it looks like joe biden when he s trying to go down the stairs of air force one. you did it! yay! [applause] greg: i m always wondering, how is morgan going to make some red meat out of this one? how can i tie this in to joe biden? morgan: i tried to be funny. it s hard.
have you ever won an emmy? todd: i have not. greg: right. do you ever wish you had? todd: actually applied, and in local news you actually have to apply yourself and pay your own fee in order to win the enemy. that leads me to my conclusion, there s no way in hell that the on-air talent didn t know about the scheme, if for no other reason then people in this business talk, and it s a small business. if you see sportscaster x at another station win the award, you know, you ve done your research. you ve been monitoring the emmys. you know they won that award. when randomly a package shows up in the mail and says he won the award, you know it s not yours. second point, though, greg, you ran the names. one thing you didn t mention about those names, those are all adult film star names. [laughter] derek howard? kirk henry? chris fulton, lee clark, and steve ponder.