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Transcripts For KGO Jimmy Kimmel Live 20240714

Did everybody look a porn star back then . [ laughter ] or did porn stars look like everyone . Im not sure. But fathers day of course is the day on which we punish dad for having sex with our mothers by forcing him to talk on the phone. [ laughter ] it was an especially special fathers day because we heard from some folks we havent heard from in quite a while, including bill cosby, who took time to tweet hey hey hey, its americas dad. I dont sleep. But to all he dads its an honor to be called a father. So lets make today a renewed oath to fulfilling our purpose, strengthening our families and communities. Well, thanks, dr. Huxtable. What an uplifting message from jail. [ laughter ] somebodys now slipping roofies into his own drinks. By the way, i dont think hey hey hey works anymore. As a general rule, your first Public Statement after going to prison for Sexual Assault shouldnt start with hey hey hey. [ laughter ] if you hear the words hey hey hey cover your drinks. Okay . And by the

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Transcripts For KGO Jimmy Kimmel Live 20240714

Star back then . [ laughter ] or did porn stars look like everyone . Im not sure. But fathers day of course is the day on which we punish dad for having sex with our mothers by forcing him to talk on the phone. [ laughter ] it was an especially special fathers day because we heard from some folks we havent heard from in quite a while, including bill cosby, who took time to tweet hey hey hey, its americas dad. I dont sleep. But to all the dads its an honor to be called a father. So lets make today a renewed oath to fulfilling our purpose, strengthening our families and communities. Well, thanks, dr. Huxtable. What an uplifting message from jail. [ laughter ] somebodys now slipping roofies into his own drinks. By the way, i dont think hey hey hey works anymore. As a general rule, your first Public Statement after going to prison for Sexual Assault shouldnt start with hey hey hey. [ laughter ] if you hear the words hey hey hey cover your drinks. Okay . And by the way, how is it that bill

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Transcripts For BBCNEWS HARDtalk 20240707

jens stoltenberg was speaking as leaders of nato countries prepare to meet at a summit in madrid on tuesday. now on bbc news, it s hardtalk. welcome to hardtalk, i m stephen sackur. what i find funny, you might find offensive. comedy challenges taste and convention and it can rouse strong reaction, as we saw at this year s 0scars when a joke earned comedian chris rock a slap in the face from the actor will smith. my guest today has spent more than 25 years finding laughs in sometimes unlikely places. 0mid djalili was born in london to iranian parents. he has thrived as a cross culture comedic chameleon, but is it possible to be funny without being mean? 0mid djalili, welcome to hardtalk. stephen sackur, my friend, my fellow presenter in the business of show, man who is so unbelievably good looking and thin that he walks into snooker hall, they start chalking his head. i am so happy to be here, this is one of my favourite shows. well, if you carry on like that, this won t be a

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Transcripts For BBCNEWS HARDtalk 20240707

in sometimes unlikely places, omid djalili was born in london to iranian parents. he has thrived as a cross culture comedic chameleon, but is it possible to be funny without being mean? omid djalili, welcome to hardtalk. stephen sackur, my friend, my fellow presenter in the business of show, man who is so unbelievably good looking and thin that he walks into snooker hall, they start chalking his head. i am so happy to be here, this is one of my favourite shows. well, if you carry on like that, this won t be an interview, it will be a monologue! let me ask you this, you have been doing comedy for almost 30 years, do you find the same stuff funny today as you did back then? what a tricky question! what a way to start. that is such a tricky question. look, at the end of the day, it is a big subject now because we saw the oscars and we saw will smith smack chris rock. can i just tell you, just to speak personally, i saw the video the day after, and i bleary eyed woke up on monday

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Transcripts For COM The Daily Show With Jon Stewart 20130731

Benson and rob lube bell. Also check out Anthony Jeselnik offensive. Com. We will see you next week, but before i go back, lets look back at the best moments from tonights show. The honeymooners. I cant believe i married such a cheapskate. I took you out last night. But that was to the emergency room. [applause] all right, all right, all right. Thats enough. Thats enough. He is dead. [applause] good night, kids go read a book. [music] from comedy centrals world news headquarters in new york, this is the daily show with jon stewart. [ cheers and applause ] john welcome to the daily show. My name is john oliver. Im still sitting in for jon stewart. He is waiting at home for time warner to come fix his cable. They said theyd be there between noon and 2 00 on june 10. Frankly hes still waiting there. Our guest tonight from project runway, mr. Tim gunn is with us. [ cheers and applause ] a glorious human being. But we start tonight with justice. Now earlier this summer we heard a lot about

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