Its bluegrass, kahn. Music made in america. And whether you like it or not your daughters a natural. Mmhmm. And im having more fun than a dog up a bone tree. Thats how you say its fun in bluegrass. screaming that inbred music is designed so only people with six fingers can play it. Your path is van cliburn camp to harvard to new York Philharmonic not hay wagon to hee haw. Time to pack we love you, honey. Phone as soon as you get to host family in fort worth. Remember to give them the pineapple. Kahn practice on bus. Aww. Mr. Hill . My dad said i could go to branson. How fast do you think you can get the dale gribble bluegrass experience back together . Probably after they finish their beers. Hey, guys, dont open a new one. Were going to branson men cheering boomhaueur yeah, man. We love branson, man. Car Insurance Companies say theyll save you by switching, youd have like, a ton of dollars. But howre they saving you those dollars . A lot of Companies Might answer um or no comment. Then theres esurance. Born online, raised by technology and majors in efficiency. So whatever they save, you save. Hassle, time, paperwork, hairtearing out, and yes, especially dollars. Esurance. Now backed by allstate. Click or call. Sponsored in part by. Hot shot . Hows it taste . [ male announcer ] that hot spicy taste is like a slap to the face. New kfc hot shot bites. 100 breast meat with a spicy cayenne pepper marinade. Try a 6 piece combo. Just 3. 99. Come on, dale. You dont need two suitcases. Theyre my jumpsuits. Thats what the people come to see. Bobby, i cant babysit you and bill and hes in the band. Bill, spit that out. Im coming with you. Yakov smirnoff is in branson and hes a steppingstone to my comedywriting future. sighs all right. But you better sleep the whole way. Well be careful. What do i care . Country Music playing ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow. Hi, dad. Fort worth is great. Whats the competition like . Is tim woo there . Yeah, but he hurt his hand stealing a coke from the coke machine. laughing hey, connie, is is my tongue blue . Ah. Whos that . uh. Its tim woo. His tongue is blue. Dad, i got to go practice some more. Yes, go practice. Okay, dad. I love you. Stop talking. Go practice. The key to writing a good Yakov Smirnoff joke is picturing yourself arriving in america and noticing that it is different from russia. Its brilliant, really. The only thing brilliant really about Yakov Smirnoff is that hes a kgb spy. Hes been sending u. S. Secrets back to mother russia while tourists are seduced by his fake comedy act. Although his beard is real. laughing oh, this joke will kill. bad accent in america, you put in god we trust on your money. In russia, we have no money. laughter oh. come on, focus. Does anybody remember why were going to branson . Fiddle contest. And to have fun. Yes, yes, were going to have fun but you know whats not fun . Being illprepared. Hank all right, everybody. Cough up two bucks and well be officially entered. No turning back now. Hey, its ten to 5 00 you think its too late to get seats for the 5 00 yakov . cheering well, maybe you can get yakov to write you an autograph dear dale, hope the show was worth throwing away that young girls musical career. Can do, will do. Come on, connie. Okay, connie, just tell them well. See, shes not interested. Where do we put the gift . Mess up her bed and hide it underneath her pillow and when she come home from audition well scream at her kahn jr. , clean up your filthy room and when she cleans it up thats when she finds the limoges violin. Bill monroe . The foggy mountain boys . Minh, have you seen this pornography . Dont worry, shes in fort worth. We throw it out before she gets back. Wait a minute. Tim woo hates cocacola shrieks connies in branson. Ive been learning english for 20 years. Now i move to the ozarks, i have to start all over again. Mel tillis is teaching me english. Its taking a lot longer than i expected. audience laughing Yakov Smirnoff is not my real name. It used to be jack daniels. laughing mr. Smirnoff. I would one day like to be a comedian like yourself. Ive written an in america and in russia joke for you that i think is very funny. Hey, kid, i dont tell russian jokes for last ten years. Now i do jokes about relationships and things i observe. laughing ill give you 20 american. Keep them coming. shouting groans why did you do that . Save the sweetguy act for the tourists, nikolai. The cia will be here momentarily. I called them during the statue of liberty dance number. Are you okay . My left eye really burns. Hes faking it, bobby. Its all part of his act. Which, by the way, is very funny. gasps bill yakov was so funny. Oh, and we got to meet him after the show. Great guy. Where have you guys been . Ive had to deal with the bluegrass brothers all by myself. Theyve been staring at me, twiddling their beards and trying to psych me out. Dad, i sold my joke to yakov. Im a professional comedy writer. Look, i told you to stay out of my wallet. The dale gribble bluegrass experience . Yo, man. Yall are on after the harris twins. Oh, god. Well, this is it, connie. Your dream to become a professional bluegrass musician. Dont blow it. My dream . Mr. Hill. Come on, connie, focus. Rosin up your bow and focus. No i dont want to be a professional bluegrass musician. I quit. And i quit, too even though im not in the band. What . Where are you going . The twins are finishing. Connie. Well, i saw that coming. Yet i did nothing to stop it. Why do i fear success . Five oceans. Seven continents. Whatever it takes. Wherever it takes us. Americas navy. A global force for good. Could save you fifteen percent or more on car insurance. Yep, Everybody Knows that. Well, did you know the ancient pyramids were actually a mistake . Uhoh. Geico. Fifteen minutes could save you. Well, you know. Even tastier . New quality ingredients. We now have premium cuts of meat, like 100 angus beef. And hickory ham. Thats right, baby. [ female announcer ] and our tasty new buttery seasoned crusts. Then. We add hot. Because hot makes everything better. [ female announcer ] new hot pockets. Mmmm. [ female announcer ]. With premium cuts of meat and new buttery seasoned crusts. Better taste. Better quality. [ ding ] hot pockets [ female announcer ] nestle. Good food. Good life. Maybe connie ran off cause of stage fright. Okay. Im not afraid to say it. Were a novelty band without connie. Its going to be fine. You guys just stall the audience until i get her back. Boomhauer, youre good at stage patter. Yeah, man, maybe theyll give a little hey, man, how yall doing in branson, man . Let me hear you say, yeah. good. Perfect. Do that. yells you kidnapped my daughter and took her across state lines to play hillbilly music against her will. Ive been looking for a reason to put you in jail, and now i have it. What are you talking about . You gave her permission to come with us. Never i make sure she practice mozart. Get into van cliburn, then ivy league orchestra. From there, she play paris, rome. Then i take her back to my hometown of Luang Phabang and stick it up their nose. Thats why she ran away from you. Shed rather play bluegrass and win this contest and then get a record deal and open up the Connie Souphanousinphone theater and. Ah, im a jackass. Stop stating the obvious. Where is my daughter . Uh. I dont know. Im sure shes fine. Shes with bobby. Great. That narrows it down. Now all we have to do is check every free buffet in town. Bobby how about this one . Ive been working out with weights. Every time someone says, lets work out i say, wait. Thats funny, bobby. Im sorry. Its just. Im sick of our dads putting pressure on me. At least theyre paying attention. Feels like im always playing to an empty house. You know what id love to do . Run away to the Appalachian Mountains and play bluegrass all day long with people who know that music is about having fun. People who sing and smile even though theyre poor and their faces are smudged with coal. And i can wear overalls with no shirt and tell jokes about the high cost of mules. Lets do it dale gribble bluegrass experience . Youre up. Uh. Theyre not here. Theyre. Locked in a vault. What . Dale hold on screw connie, i got us an even better fiddle player. May i present to you. Mr. Charlie daniels. Where is this young fiddle player whose final wish was to meet me . Well, actually, youre too late but her other final wish was that you would play with us her Favorite Song on that stage now. So, what do i tell her parents . Tell them ill play till my fiddle catches fire. Oh. We cant afford bus tickets. We only have enough money for a tshirt or a row of seats at the Andy Williams show. Well, i could go for either, but its up to you. Bobby, we are going to be in appalachia by sundown. Why do we do it, kahn . Why do we push connie so hard . I do it because she has a lot of talent and i want whats best for her. You do it. Well, frankly, im flummoxed. Back off. Push bobby. dismissive snort he doesnt like sports. He doesnt play an instrument. Theres nothing to push him into. Yeah. Hes going to be a loser, all right. Now, hold on. Bobbys not a loser. For your information a lot of people think bobbys funny. The kids only 13 years old and hes already sold a joke to this Yakov Smirnoff. Oh, yeah . Yeah. Uh. In america, they put in god we trust on the money. In russia, they have no money. laughing thats funny. I hate russia. Yeah. Yeah, that is a good joke. Its. Branson good. Blue moon of kentucky keep on shinin. Aw, damn you, hank hill. I cant get that song out of my head. Aah here it goes again. Blue moon of kentucky. fiddle playing keep on shinin. Kahn ah shes playing on the streets for lousy tourists. She should be playing at Royal Albert Hall for Prince Charles and Camilla Parker bowles. Oh, come on, kahn, i bet you never knew she could smile and play at the same time. accompanying connie shine on the one thats gone and left me blue. It was on a moonlit night the stars were shining bright when they whispered. Maybe one day you can be our opening act. Your love has said goodbye blue moon. Of kentucky keep on shining shine on the one thats gone and proved untrue blue moon of kentucky keep on shining shine on the one thats gone and said goodbye. Heeheehee. Connie souphanousinphone, everyone. Shes only 13. Thats him hey use force if you need to captioned by Media Access Group at wgbh access. Wgbh. Org at ikea, we dont just we design good mornings. Little experiments. Big ideas. Brighter ways. And better tomorrows you can take home today. Imagine if everyday was just a little bit better for everyone. Hank hmm. I like it. So i cant afford to have germy surfaces. But after one days use, dishcloths can redeposit millions of germs. So ditch your dishcloth and switch to a fresh sheet of new bounty duratowel. Look a fresh sheet of bounty duratowel leaves this surface cleaner than a germy dishcloth, as this black light reveals. Its durable, clothlike and its 3 times cleaner. So ditch your dishcloth and switch to new bounty duratowel. The durable, clothlike pickerupper. Woman the following is a paid presentation for the nuwave precision induction cooktop, brought to you by the makers of the numberoneselling nuwave oven. Announcer when you turn on your cooktop, do you really know what the temperature is . No youre just guessing. Are you too busy to watch what youre cooking . Tired of all that burnt food going to waste . Worried about your kids getting burned or a loved one starting a fire in the kitchen . Well, those problems are a thing of the past. Introducing the revolutionary precision induction cooktop from nuwave, the leader in portable induction cooking technology. The nuwave heats up twice as fast, uses up to 70 less energy and is safer than any cooktop. Best of all, the nuwave is the only portable cooktop that gives you precise temperature control with the simple press of a button. Professional chefs create greattasting meals by maintaining the precise temperature for the perfect amount of time. Well, now you can get professional results too, with the nuwave precision induction cooktop. The key to great food is knowing how to control the temperatures of what youre cooking. Now the p. I. C. Is allowing people at home to cook like you can in a restaurant. I know that when i turn it on that temperature, its going to be that temperature. Theres no guessing. Announcer not only does the nuwave give you precise temperature control, it heats up twice as fast as an electric cooktop. I put the water in the pan and turned around and the next thing i knew, it was boiling. What amazes me about p. I. C. Is how quickly it will heat up. Induction technology is just unbelievable. Announcer and because theres no flame to catch fire, no hot coils to burn you, the nuwave precision induction cooktop is the safest cooktop ever invented. Look what happens with this egg the pan is hot, but the cooktop is not. Thats the magic of induction cooking. Make pasta in half the time. Melt butter with no chance of it burning. Melt chocolate to creamy perfection. Make sauces with perfect temperature control. Its small, its efficient, its clean and its safe. Announcer and because its portable, you can take it anywhere, so its perfect for buffets and outdoor parties. To tell you more, lets join bob warden and jenny repko at the nuwave test kitchen in chicago. Let me ask you, do you hate boilovers and the mess they make in the kitchen . Do you hate burnt Grilled Cheese sandwiches or shriveledup bacon . What about overfried chicken thats all greasy, or driedout oatmeal, overdone pork chops or charred steak . Well, what if i was to tell you that instead, you could now have perfect Grilled Cheese sandwiches, perfectly browned evenly every single time . All that cheese is melted in there, so delicious. Perfectly melted. And i could have perfectly grilled steaks set at 350 degrees that give me a perfect medium rare steak or however you like it and its never going to burn. Perfect pork chops, and not only pork chops. Right, salmon, grilled vegetables, sausage, perfect every time. What if i told you, when you fried your chicken, it was going to be fried at the perfect temperature of 375, gently, perfectly, crispy, never soaking up too much oil. Thats hard to do. In fact, thats the problem with the old stovetops, whether its gas or electric you can turn it up and down, but because you dont have precise control, youre going to get boilovers. Because you dont have precise control, youre going to burn the cereal on the bottom from time to time. And because you dont have precise temperature control, you cant help but burn a steak or a pork chop on your stove. You see, youre not the bad cook in the kitchen. The stovetop is the bad cook in the kitchen. Thats right, and those days of bad cooking are over, thanks to the fine folks here at nuwave, makers of the numberoneselling countertop oven in the world. Well, theyve done it again. Youre looking at the new wave in stovetop cooking. Now, this ingenious invention will make your life a whole lot easier in the kitchen and a whole lot shorter and a lot more fun. Were going to show you how and why every meal breakfast, snacks, lunch, dinner, grilled steaks, fondues and buffets will be made perfectly every time. Because now, for the first time, you can precisely control the cooking temperature. Announcer now you can live well for less with the nuwave precision induction cooktop. Its the most energyefficient way to cook. The nuwave p. I. C. Uses induction technology. The secret is an internal series of copper coils. These coils generate a Magnetic Field within your metal pots and pans. The Magnetic Field causes invisible molecules to begin vibrating rapidly, creating heat, so the cookware itself heats the food. One of my passions are butter sauces. And one of the challenges of cooking a butter sauce is that if you get it too hot, you know, over 135 degrees, it breaks down. If you get it too cool, it congeals. The beauty of the nuwave p. I. C. Is that i can control the temperature exactly and keep the sauce for an extended period of time. Thats such an added bonus for a professional cook and a home cook. Let me show you this unusual pan. Bob, what did we do here . Well, we actually cut a pan and cut a section out, because in here you can see we have cereal rapidly boiling, right . Boiling away. I can put my hand right there. Its amazing. Move your hand. Im going to put an ice cube right there. Its not melting. Because all of the energy is going into cooking your food. Theres nothing wasted anywhere outside of the pan, so this is perfectly cool. So wipe that ice cube off there. O. K. , ive got a cloth right here. Watch this, ill take this ice cube, wipe it up. Im using a paper towel on a burner. Theres no fire, theres no flame, so its so safe. And the minute you put the pan back on it starts boiling right again. Wow. Now, because were cooking without fire, jenny, im going to take a sheet of play money and put it between the p. I. C. And the pan