>> until my heart stops beating, i will never give up. >> can he get her back? and should he? can you see why people would say, well, maybe she's better off where she is? also tonight -- >> this doesn't happen in our happy little world. >> their world shattered, a young mother murdered. >> i love you. >> who could have killed her? >> we had a homicide, no suspects. >> also, no evidence. but police found a dark side behind that bright suburban facade. >> she slept with the children and the door locked. >> and finally a vital clue. >> it's the most pointed piece of premeditation. >> what happened to nancy? the day she disappeared. captions paid for by nbc-universal television good evening. welcome to a dit line." i'm lester holt. it it's the battle that can cause deeper heartbreak, the vicious tug-of-war over a child. for the father you're about to meet, the story began with young love. but because of an unusual law, he lost someone he cared for more than anything else in the world, his baby. here's kate snow. >> you can't just take someone's child like that. that's a human being's life. it it's not anything to be played with. >> this story is about what happens when the most primal bond there is between parent and child collides with the law. >> they could go into any state and take anybody's baby. >> a case of courtroom wrangling. >> people are outraged. >> and raw emotion. >> when is it going to stop? how many more kids? >> all leading to the bottom-line question -- how far would you go for your child? >> until my heart stops beating, i will never give up. until the day i die, i will never give up. >> john wyatt is 23 years old and sometimes he seems even younger. you know how some people marry their high school sweetheart? john found the woman he loved much earlier than that. >> i have memories of her back in second, third, fourth grade. >> his little classmate was named killeen. what did you like about her? >> i thought she was very beautiful. i liked her smile. like the people who speak the least, you know, really have the most to say. >> john and colleen grew up in virginia, 30 miles from washington, d.c. they started dating in middle school, stayed together in high school. did you ever think about marrying colleen? >> i mean, i loved her since middle school so i talked about it since middle school. >> about marriage. >> yeah. >> pretty young to be thinking that far ahead. >> i know. well, when you know, you know. >> maybe he knew, but he says colleen's parents didn't seem so sure. >> at first i got along good with her had family. but as i got older i felt like i wasn't good enough in their standards for their own daughter. i just felt like i was being looked down upon. >> it didn't it help that, after high school, john didn't go to college. colleen attended george mason university. but they still dated, and then the surprise of their lives. >> when she found out she was pregnant, then she started crying. she was really scared. i just held her and told her everything was going to be all right. >> clearly this wasn't planned. >> no. >> how old were you? >> i was 19 at the time. >> 19. pretty young to become a dad. >> yeah. >> a lot of guys might have been looking for a way out. not john wyatt. you must have been a little scared. not even a little? >> i mean, what's to be scared about? it's the most beautiful, precious thing in the world. >> john found an ally in his own mom, gerri. did you ever think for a second, they're too young? >> no. because i know john takes had his role seriously. i knew how he felt about kids and i knew how he felt about wanting a baby. >> but 19 years old. >> i know. it's tough, but he can do it. >> john and his mom say they didn't even discuss alternatives. >> abortion is out of the question. i don't -- >> adoption? did you ever discuss it? >> no. no. >> perhaps, they admit, because of a terrible thing that happened when john was just 10 years old. his father committed suicide. do you think he felt abandoned? >> yeah, i think to a degree he did. he did feel abandoned. he loved his dad. i loved my husband. it it was a terrible time in our lives. >> ever since he has died i've had kind of like a yearning to fulfill those shoes as far as i wanted to make sure that i don't fail means everything to me. to make sure i'm there for my children. >> so at the wyatt house there was total agreement, the baby belonged with its parents. but across town at colleen's house, john was seeing signs that colleen didn't feel the same way. >> i used to feel her kick and move around. i would talk to her because the doctor said, you know, they can hear what you're saying. >> she didn't do that? did she talk to the baby as well? >> she would feel it kicking, but, i mean, she never really talked to her. >> john went to prenatal doctor's appointments. he picked out names. >> i liked the name emma. that was her grandmother's name as well so i decided on if it was a girl, emma. >> but then, he says, in the ninth month of the pregnancy everything changed. colleen called him and said she was considering an adoption. the next day she sent a text saying she'd contacted an adoption agency in utah. that seemed odd, he says, since neither one of them had ever been there. were you angry? >> yeah. that's putting it itlightly. she assured me later that night i was going to be there for the birth and that we were going to make a decision together. she assured me of that. promised me. >> five days passed. john said he and colleen spoke every day and he felt he was talking her out of adoption. he says they even discussed marriage. then on february 10th he says he called as usual but colleen didn't answer. >> her phone was off. i thought that was weird. >> the whole day passed with no word from colleen. >> so then i wake up around 6:00 in the morning on the 11th, and i felt like something was wrong. >> he says he called again. her phone was still off. >> so that's when i started to get really worried. that's when i called my mom. >> and he said, something's wrong. colleen's phone is off. her phone is never off. there's something wrong. >> my mom had the idea to call down to the hospital to make sure if my daughter or colleen was in the hospital. they both confirmed there was a baby girl salen and emily colleen salen in the hospital. >> how are you walking in the hospital? >> i'm walking like my hair is on fire, trying to find my daughter. >> you're on a mission. >> yes. i asked the lady at the defk, is there a baby girl salen here? she said, i can't tell you that. >> there is no patient here by this name. >> to which you said what? >> i said, you're lying. i told them that i knew that this baby was here and that this mother was here, that her parents' cars were in the parking lot, there was an empty car seat box. please do not lie to me and treat me like i'm some fool. >> the wyatts say they later learned that, while they were tangling with hospital administrators, colleen was checking out with the baby. >> colleen was being snuck out the side exit maybe like 50 feet to my left like down the hallway out to the side exit. >> sneaking out the side door. >> uh-huh. >> so you wouldn't see her. >> yeah. so that i couldn't find my child. >> where is his child? why can't he see his child? who's playing god with his life? that he can't see his baby? >> it would take weeks for john and his mom to learn the truth. what they found broke their hearts and plunged them into the battle of their lives. coming up -- a father's desperate search for his baby. following a trail thousands of miles. >> they said that she had been placed with a couple in utah. on february 10, 2009, john wyatt's girlfriend colleen gave birth to a baby girl, then disappeared. john suspected she planned to give the baby up for adoption without his consent. he wanted to stop it, but first he had to find his girlfriend and his baby. >> did you talk to colleen's family? >> no. >> you were completely cut off. >> yeah. i was -- it was like i didn't exist. >> the hospital would not confirm colleen had even been there, citing its policy to protect patient confidentiality. but john was determined to get the truth. he roam the hospital corridors looking for someone who would give him answers. >> i talked to one of the women who works in the records room in the hospital, and i told them what was going on. they were withoutraged. they helped me. >> someone secretly told me what your baby looked like. >> all the information. >> john texted colleen. she didn't respond. he hired a lawyer. >> your lawyer tries to intervene right away. >> yeah. >> john's lawyer wrote a letter asking for john to see and visit with his daughter. it hand-delivered to colleen's home february 12th, two days after the baby was born. john says the response came from colleen's lawyer. >> saying that the only way i could see my child is if i agreed to sign my rights away. >> on february 13th, his lawyer faxed a second letter saying john would oppose any adoption adamantly and that he planned to file a petition for custody. february 18th, a week after the birth, john did go to court and file for custody of his daughter. at that point, are you thinking, okay, good, i've got a lawyer now, should be no problem. i'm a parent. i have rights. >> i was thinking, surely they won't take my child away since i have filed a custody action. >> days passed, then weeks. john says colleen would not return his calls and texts. where was she? where was the baby? in the months that followed, john's mom gerri pieced together colleen's trail from the moment she left the hospital. she started with hotels. >> i didn't call. i walked into them, and i thought, you know, if i have to go into every hotel in wood bridge to find out where they are, i will. >> it was old-fashioned detective work by a self-appointed detective. you went from hotel to hotel. >> i did. >> telling your story. >> i did. >> asking if they knew who these people were. >> and you know people were so nice because they were dumbfound that somebody would do something like this. >> but even with the help of sympathetic hotel clerks, finding the truth wasn't simple. no one had any record of colleen checking in or out, but someone did remember a newborn baby. gerri thought it had to be colleen's, even though there was someone else's name on the hotel receipt. >> they go to the fairfield inn where are there were two rooms for two nights. they left that hotel and went across the street to the sleep inn. >> why would they jump between hotels? >> because they didn't want john to find them, i think. >> something she and john believed even more strongly when they learned that the name on the hotel bill, the name they didn't recognize, belonged to an employee of an adoption agency called a act of love. >> you think they were purposely evading you. >> there's no doubt in my mind that's what they were doing. >> and he says he soon found more evidence of it. on the day the baby was born, colleen had signed an affidavit. she had identified john as the father but you in the space for john's address there was a question mark, even though she had known john since second grade, dated him since middle school and had seen him at least once a week for years. it didn't seem possible, but what really surprised them was something else colleen had written in adoption paperwork ten days earlier. the line where she clearly stated john wants to keep the baby. yet the adoption went forward anyway. >> it seemed really easy for them, put a question mark here, question mark there. then she's gone. >> and they have a baby. >> yeah. >> but of all the things john learned in the months of after his baby was born, he says the biggest shock was when his lawyers told him this. >> they said that she had been placed with a couple in utah. >> utah. his baby was in utah, 2,000 miles away. >> did you know anything about the state of utah? >> no. >> but john wyatt was about to learn plenty. >> he was about to learn more about utah's laws and what they mean for some biological fathers. >> it felt like someone had p ripped my heart out. i cried my eyes out. >> when "date line "continues. and before you know it zebras were out. so i tried this paint that promised to do the job fast. but it didn't. yep. and that's why i came to lowe's. our hi-def color system from valspar has an ultimate hiding formula. plus nobody beats our prices. nobody. now it's just the shade of green we wanted. which goes with his new interest. dinosaurs? yep. 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[ female announcer ] welcome to busch gardens williamsburg where d.c. goes to get away. maybe it's because washington d.c. loves the legendary coasters. or that your entire family will have fun, even the little ones. it could be that water country usa has more of the waves, slides and rides everyone wants. so plan your getaway and come play. you never know who you'll run into. get started at buschgardens.com/dc. in early 2009, john wyatt learned that his girlfriend colleen had put their baby girl p up for adoption. john also learned had his baby was now in utah, thousands of miles awayand she was live aring withare ing ing with a marry couple who flew to virginia who planned to adopt her, all of it without his consent. >> i was appalled that people actually took my child not only from me and fled halfway across the country and no one has taken any action to stop or prevent it. >> john wanted to get his baby back. he was contacted by an attorney in utah and was startedled what he heard. >> biological lawyers are set up to fail. >> he said utah's adoption laws can seem like a maze. >> you have to go through a whole series of steps here in utahment a layperson can never be charged with knowing how to maneuver their way through the different steps you have to take. >> john found out, for example, that the odd text message colleen had sent him a few days before the birth was extremely significant. the exact words -- do you understand that i'm receiving information from a utah agency for proceeding with an adoption? out of the blue, this text message says, i'm thinking of a utah adoption. >> yeah. >> john says he didn't know it at the time, but the moment he received that message, a clock started ticking. under utah law, colleen's text counted as legal notice, giving john just 20 days to file for his parental rights in utah or lose them. >> and "almost" isn't good enough unless the father complies with every single requirement of the statute, they're out of luck. >> in this case, john admits there was no almost about it. he says he didn't even know at the time that his baby was in utah so even though he filed for custody in virginia he missed utah's deadline. but, remember, john also says colleen misled him saying she wouldn't give the baby for adoption without had his consent. that has to count for something, right? not in utah. laws in this state says even if a fraud is committed, money damages can be sued for but the adoption stands. >> people who want an expedited adoption, something that isn't going to take too much time with the birnl father's rights, if you want something like that, the word "utah" does roll off the lips. >> adam pertman is director of the evan b. donaldson adoption institute, a leading research institute. he's author of a adoption nation" and also "an doptive parent he and others say utah's longstanding pro-family values have resulted in laws that when it comes among unmarried birth fathers are among the strictest in the country. >> it's a aes's conservative state. state vz values. people have values. i'm not saying that in a bad way. >> john's lawyer says in most cases utah's deadline is not a problem, quite the contrary. >> a lot of fathers don't have any interest in raising their children, and to some it's probably a relief. they get excused from child support obligations and everything else that goes along with being a parent. >> but for unmarried fathers who want to raise their children, it it can be a different story. john and his mom say they've found at least a dozen other men who say utah's laws made it hard to claim their rights as fathers. nick thurnwood, for example, says his girlfriend gave their baby up for adoption without telling had him. he fought all the way to the utah's supreme court. the ruling? nick did a lot of things right but failed to sign one key document. you lose all your rights to your own child because you didn't sign a piece of paper? >> it felt like someone had ripped my heart out. i couldn't function. i cried my eyes out. >> cody owe day's ex-girlfriend told him she had a miscarriage, then months later out of the blue she called him. >> she said, i'm in utah. you will not father this child. dow understand what i'm saying? >> she mentioneds utah. >> just i'm in utah. that was after the phone call. she gave birth and gave it up within 24 hours. >> you missed the deadline. >> i missed the deadline. >> ramsay shaud said he did not miss the deadlines. his lawyer filed records with the utah department of vital records the day before the baby was born. >> and it was stamped received there january 14, 2010. >> and yet he later found -- >> it had an "x" drawn through it and rescamped january 20, 2010. >> why does that matter, it it's january 20th? >> because it's one day late. >> one day late. >> yes, ma'am. >> ramsay is still contesting the adoption, still hopes to get had his child back. nick and cody have run out of option option. do any of you know the names of your children? >> no. >> know where they live? >> no. >> seen recent photos? >> no. >> are you aware there's controversy about utah's laws? >> oh, absolutely i am. yes. >> utah attorney general mark shurt shert live is not involved in the wyatt case but it's his job to enforce and interpret utah law. he's also the father of five children, three of them adopted. >> i would agree we have a pretty strict requirement when it comes to the unmarried biological father. we do. >> why? why is that? >> because in a situation where birth mother who carried that child and who has made a decision that is in the best interest of her child to go to an adoptive child, we ought to have the same interest in the father. he ought to step up and show the same kind of commitment he had to that child in order to stop that. >> shirt live says the 20-day deadline requires fathers to show that commitment and also protects adoptive children and parents. >> there is an impact on a child to be in a home for 30 days, six months, a year and then have that changed and shifted. so there has to be some point where there's a cutoff. some may say utah's too short with 20 days, but we're comfortable with it and we think it provides an opportunity for a birth father