crew. >> questlove: 660, missouri! >> steve: and now, here he is, jimmy fallon! ♪ ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: oh, that feels good. welcome. thank you very, very, very much. and welcome to you. welcome, welcome, welcome, welcome, welcome, welcome, welcome at home as well. welcome to "the tonight show." this is it, baby. [ cheers and applause ] this is the show. this is the one to be at. you guys made it. welcome. well, here's what people are all talking about. this weekend was the big march for science, the big march. and there was a lot of animal rights activists protesting trump's policies on endangered species. trump was like, "i love endangered species. [ light laughter ] that's why i refuse to drink the new unicorn frappuccino at starbucks. [ laughter and applause ] i would not order that at all. all right, i had two, but after that, i'm full. no more." actually, environmental activists say that trump's border wall would disrupt the migration of hundreds of species. animals were like, "no problem. we'll just tunnel under it like everyone else. no worries." [ laughter and applause ] go right underneath. i saw that bill nye the science guy spoke at the march in d.c. and said that the founding fathers promoted science in article one of the constitution. trump was like, "eh, i don't read it for the articles." [ laughter and applause ] ♪ but trump actually responded to the marches. in fact, to prove that he loves science, he released his own science dictionary. check out some of the definitions that he wrote here. for example, "absolute zero" is a term to describe mike pence's personality. [ laughter and applause ] >> steve: wow. who knew? >> jimmy: next up, "ferdinand magellan" is the doctor who created massaging gel insoles. [ light laughter ] that's -- [ scattered applause ] >> steve: i got to put my gel in. sure. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: in no particular order, he has "hale-bopp." that is a popular '90s song written by hanson. [ light laughter ] oh, i know that. >> steve: oh, yeah. ♪ hale-bopp bop bop duba duba da du ♪ >> jimmy: next up, "the universe" is what revolves around donald j. trump. well, that's interesting. >> steve: oh! [ audience ohs ] [ applause ] ho, hey! >> jimmy: and finally, an "asteroid belt" is how chris christie keeps his pants up. >> steve: oh, come on. [ laughter and applause ] >> jimmy: that's not -- that can't be real. >> steve: it can't be right. >> jimmy: well, i don't know. >> steve: i never. >> jimmy: but now, trump -- trump says now the wall will cost less than $10 billion, but it could be more if he makes it, quote, "super duper." [ laughter ] >> steve: come on! >> jimmy: and taxpayers say, "wait a second. you never said it could be super duper." [ light laughter ] [ scattered applause ] "well, honey, this wall's going to be super duper!" [ light laughter ] super duper. yesterday, trump sent a tweet about the proposed border wall that was just a little bit confusing. did you see this? this is real. it says, "eventually, but at a a later date, so we can get started early --" [ light laughter ] "mexico will be paying in some form for the badly needed border wall." [ laughter ] so to clear things up, trump sent another tweet that said, "right now we are building a a wall in the future starting two hours ago tomorrow. [ light laughter ] today mexico will pay us, not in money and not today, but yes." [ laughter and applause ] when that still didn't clarify things, trump tweeted, "the wall will be called 'tomorrow,' and we're building 'tomorrow' today, which is what i call mexico. so today, will pay for 'tomorrow' when we build it starting yesterday, which is what i call myself." [ light laughter ] [ scattered applause ] finally, trump tweeted, "we're building mexico, and the wall is going to pay for it." and that makes no sense. [ applause ] that doesn't make any sense at all. you guys see this? on saturday, kenny g. gave a a surprise performance on a a delta flight. or as united put it, "touche." [ laughter ] >> steve: hey-yo! >> jimmy: this is -- [ light laughter ] this is pretty big. there were power outages in new york city and san francisco on friday that caused massive delays on the subway. people in san francisco passed the time by talking, while new yorkers waited a full five minutes before eating each other. [ laughter and applause ] "i can't take it!" "stop it, man!" some more sports news here. charles barkley was talking about players going through shooting slumps this weekend, and he told a very interesting story. check this out. >> so, we played -- i played in college with this guy who had -- who smoked pot all the time. >> okay, wow. >> true story. >> i wonder where this story is going. >> and the coach says, "we need to do an intervention." >> yeah, we need to -- >> so we got together. we said, "man, you got to quit smoking pot." the guy could never make a a shot. so we went back to the coach and -- "coach, he need his pot." [ laughter ] [ scattered applause ] >> jimmy: everyone was like, "be honest. that guy was you, right?" [ laughter ] we was like, "well, yeah, yeah. yeah, you got me.e [ laughter ] but still. you saw where i'm going with this." [ applause ] finally, i saw that a a two-century-old nude statue of george washington is coming to the u.s. for the first time. that's right. we're finally going to find out what the washington monument looks like. there we go. [ laughter ] we have a great show tonight. give it up for the roots! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: oh, thank you guys very much. that was some really good clapping. i don't know, quest, if you heard, the audience was so good at clapping there. you were playing that song. they weren't just going like -- [ slow clapping ] [ light laughter ] if you heard, our audience was going -- [ faster clapping ] [ light laughter ] >> questlove: soul clap. >> jimmy: that's, like, advanced. that's fantastic! no audience does that! [ cheers and applause ] you guys got rhythm. our audience has rhythm. [ applause ] that was so awesome. [ cheers and applause ] that was so good. try it one more time. ♪ [ cheers ] >> jimmy: that's awesome. that's the best. >> questlove: it's called soul clapping. >> jimmy: it's soul clapping. that's what it is. >> questlove: yes. >> jimmy: soul clap mondays here on "the tonight show." [ light laughter ] it is soul clap monday. we're so happy to be back. we have a big show for you guys tonight. this guy has had a legendary 20-year career with the los angeles lakers. he has a new animated short called "dear basketball." it's beautiful. it just had its premiere of the tribeca film festival. kobe bryant is here tonight. >> steve: oh! [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: kobe! kobe bryant! he's amazing. kobe -- kobe bryant is going to do something later in the show that involves poetry. [ light laughter ] and i don't want to spoil it. that's all i'll tell you. [ laughter ] but you -- you're going to want to stick around for this. i want you all to experience this. this is going to be something fun. plus, she's such a talented and funny actress. i just -- in everything she's in, i go, "man, she just stole that scene." she's so funny, we have to get her on the show. she's from the new amazon series. there's a show on amazon called, "i love dick." and -- [ laughter ] [ cheers ] >> steve: what's the name of it? >> jimmy: no, no, no, no, no, no. no, hey. >> steve: what's the name of the show? i didn't hear you. >> jimmy: no, no. [ laughter ] i just said the name of the show. >> steve: i didn't hear you. i was busy. [ laughter ] what's it called? the show. >> jimmy: "i love dick." [ cheers ] >> steve: but the show -- >> jimmy: but kathryn hahn is stopping by tonight, you guys! [ cheers and applause ] she's great. plus, he's one of the founding members of the legendary hip-hop group, outkast. we have new music from big boi! >> steve: oh! [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: he's the best. guys, i don't know about you, but i love podcasts. do you listen to podcasts? >> steve: yeah. [ cheers ] >> jimmy: higgins? >> steve: >> jimmy: i love them. when you're at the gym or whatever you do, you're on the train, or the bus or whatever. what am i listening to? i'm listening to -- "s-town," i listen to. [ scattered applause ] >> steve: yeah. >> jimmy: isn't that good? if you like "serial" -- >> steve: yeah. >> jimmy: i think it's the same makers of -- >> steve: it's good. >> jimmy: yeah, not cereal like cereal. >> steve: right. >> jimmy: but "serial." [ light laughter ] "s-town"'s great. "missing richard simmons," that was a great one. >> steve: mm-hmm. >> jimmy: is it? right? have you listened to that one? it's fantastic. >> steve: yeah. >> jimmy: oh, these are all great podcasts. well, anyway, i was looking through itunes, and i noticed that there's a lot of obscure podcasts that i never even heard of before. so, i thought we could check a a few of them out right now. it's time for "tonight show podcasts." here we go. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ tonight show podcasts yeah ♪ ♪ [ applause ] >> jimmy: now, this is -- >> steve: you better plug that in. >> jimmy: yeah, here you go. >> steve: there you go. yeah, there you go. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: this one. >> steve: blue. >> jimmy: it's almost too loud. i got to lower it a little bit. >> steve: it's blue teeth. yeah, it's blue teeth. [ claps ] >> jimmy: siri, lower it. siri, lower it. >> steve: yeah. [ light laughter ] >> jimmy: alexa, lower the volume. alexa. >> steve: you're soul clapping. >> jimmy: our first -- it's the soul -- [ light laughter ] i taught her -- i had to teach her to soul clap. it's the only way i can lower -- uh, raise the volume. our first podcast is called, "one word answers with donald trump." >> steve: oh. [ light laughter ] >> jimmy: this is a podcast where donald trump is interviewed, but he can only give one-word answers. let's give a listen to it. >> what's the next thing on your agenda? >> wall. [ laughter ] >> what would you compare it to? >> china. [ laughter ] >> how would you describe your hands? >> huge. [ laughter ] >> how would you describe me? >> loser. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: i mean -- i can't get a -- [ applause ] i don't know how he has time for all that, being the president. >> steve: yeah. >> jimmy: this next podcast is called "knock knock jokes with vladimir putin." >> steve: oh. >> jimmy: now, this -- it's pretty self-explanatory. >> steve: yeah. >> jimmy: but it's a podcast where vladimir putin tells knock knock jokes to try to make himself seem friendlier. >> steve: oh. >> jimmy: let's see if it works. >> knock knock. >> who is there? >> h. >> h. who? >> god bless you. [ laughter ] >> knock knock. >> who's there? >> yeah. >> yeah who? >> no, i use gmail. [ laughter ] >> knock knock. >> who is there? >> dewey. >> dewey who? >> dewey want to rig an election? [ laughter ] >> jimmy: no, come on. hey, that's not -- >> i am serious. [ applause ] >> steve: that's not very friendly. >> jimmy: the last one wasn't really -- yeah. >> steve: yeah. >> jimmy: the next pod cast is called, "aziz ansari's board games and actor's podcast." it's hosted by our pal aziz ansari who lists off the names of either a popular board game or a well-known actor or actress. let's listen to this. >> yahtzee! george clooney! monopoly! [ light laughter ] laura linney! parcheesi, kevin spacey, sorry!, william h. macy, pictionary, pesci, scattergories, sigourney, whoopi, benigni, cards against humanity! paul rudd! [ laughter ] >> jimmy: paul rudd? [ applause ] >> steve: paul rudd? >> jimmy: i like paul rudd. >> steve: yeah. >> jimmy: there are 12 episodes of that. >> steve: just 12? >> jimmy: this next one is called, "the beavis and butthead and seth rogen podcast." i like all three of those dudes. >> steve: yeah. >> jimmy: let's see what this one's all about. >> ha ha ha ha. >> hee hee. >> uh huh huh huh. uh huh huh huh. [ laughter ] >> ha ha ha ha. >> uh huh huh huh. huh huh huh huh huh huh. [ laughter and applause ] >> jimmy: that's good. 33 minutes long. >> steve: yeah. 33 minutes long? >> jimmy: that's 33 minutes. this last podcast is an episode of "the shaq podcast." >> steve: ooh. >> jimmy: which is hosted by shaquille o'neal, and it's fantastic. in this episode, he interviews kim kardashian. >> steve: oh, my gosh. >> jimmy: let's take a listen. >> this is "shaq podcast." this is "shaq cast." welcome back. i'm shaq. i'm here with kim kardashian. >> hi-ee! >> starbucks just released a a unicorn frappuccino. kim, what do you think of unicorns? >> what? >> unicorns, what's your opinion of them? >> why are you asking me that? >> don't dodge the question. where do you stand on unicorns? >> i don't know. they're fine, i guess. >> they're not fine. they're great. unicorns are great. >> no! >> yes, they are. long horn, cloven hooves, symbol of purity. unicorns are magical! >> unicorns aren't real. >> yes, they are! unicorns are magical! >> no! >> they're magical! >> no! >> they're magical! >> no! >> orlando magic! >> no! >> unicorns are magical! >> no! >> pop quiz. unicorns or horses, which one is better? >> horses. >> wrong. it's unicorns. unicorns wins. i'm shaq. [ light laughter ] >> jimmy: there you go. that's it. we love that guy. [ applause ] that is all for "tonight show podcasts." [ cheers and applause ] we'll be right back with more of "the tonight show." come on back, everybody. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ when you booked this trip, you didn't know we had over 26,000 local activities listed on our app. or that you could book them right from your phone. a few weeks ago, you still didn't know if you were gonna go. now the only thing you don't know, is why it took you so long to come here. expedia. everything in one place, so you can travel the world better. the seal you can trust. with stain and sealer in one... and easy to choose colors... exceptional beauty and protection have never been easier. thompson's waterseal stain and sealer. available at national retailers. bill assumed his mayo was the best choice. assume nothing. just like the leading brand, kraft real mayo is made with high quality ingredients at a price you can feel good about no wonder kraft is so good. welcome to maxx you. you are whimsical, vibrant, statement making. we see what makes you unique. so we have something for everyone, at a price that's just right for you. maxx you. maxx life. t.j.maxx how do they make starburst taste so juicy? they use wicked small fighter jets to shoot the juiciness into every starburst. [ pilot ] it's about to get juicy. whoo! i feel so aliii... it takes guts. [ female announcer ] starburst. unexplainably juicy. sure! shut-up! ♪ i can do that! ♪ do i have to? i don't want there to be white marks. good bye beautiful dress i never got to wear. nothing! no dust, there's no marks... it's really dry! what is this? oh my god, it's dove! i knew it! it's a 48 hour antiperspirant... no white marks... ...on a 100 colors. i would absolutely use this. i think you converted me! ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: ladies and gentlemen, here to perform a slam poem about the 1990s sitcom "family matters," kobe bryant. [ cheers and applause ] transformation. urkel to urquelle. suspenders to lapels. from nerdy steve, "got any cheese?" [ laughter ] so puny and weak and metamorphosis from geek to fleek. from caterpillar to butterfly. the cocoon a metal chamber, rearranger of dna. from naughty to hottie. different person, same body. using science and playing god, he became an adonis. a charming disarmer with style and confidence. with the pull of a lever like the wave of a wand he enters a a nerd, but now he emerges stefan. [ applause ] ha! he laughs in the face of god. it is a sin, though, to change who you are? to win the heart of laura winslow? [ light laughter ] whom he wooed as he coos, "wake me, shake me, break me but baby don't forsake me." but this transmogrification -- this stefanification of steve, is but a reprieve 'fore the boss sauce wears off. steve. stefan. steve, stefan. [ light laughter ] who am i? what have i done? as one man retracts and fades to black, the other appears in a place he was at. face in a mask, he doesn't react. just looks in a mirror, a a stranger staring back and asks -- "did i do that?" [ cheers and applause ] discover card. how can i help you? oh, you're real? you know i'm real! at discover, we're always here to talk. good, 'cause i don't have time for machines. some companies just don't appreciate the power of conversation! you know, i like you! i like you too! at discover, we treat you like you'd treat you. get the it card and talk to a real person. that's like lebron trying to pperform with old equipment.? foul! (blows whistle) upgrade your game to intel's fastest processor. ♪ it's the applebee's big bold grill combos. try a chicken combo, combo'd with a ribs combo. it's the combo of combos. combo'd two meats, two sides. the big bold grill combos. starting at $12.99. only at applebee's. starting at $12.99. what do you have there? p3 it's meat, cheese and nuts. i keep my protein interesting. oh yea, me too. i have cheese and uh these herbs. p3 snacks. the more interesting way to get your protein. ball park franks got their right here in the ballpark. they soon became a summer tradition, passed from one generation to the next. with the taste of 100% angus beef, ball park franks bring on summer. i wish you were here. i miss home. ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ tango! for the guy who finds a way. always unstoppable. from the time i was pregnant with him, had so much life and energy in him. he wanted out, and he wanted to conquer the world. right now, quinton's goal is to be a doctor. it's not easy being a single parent with three kids and having to provide for them. but my son will be an amazing doctor, and he'll help people that are less fortunate. no matter where you are in your college journey, sallie mae can help you find the money you need. ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: welcome back. we are joined right now by one of the greatest players in the history of the nba. he's a five-time champion, an 18-time all-star who scored a a record 60 points in his final game, last season. it is -- that is so kobe. that is such a kobe thing to do. he's the creator, executive producer, and narrator of a new animated film called "dear basketball" which is -- it's just fantastic. it had its premiere at the tribeca film festival this past weekend. please welcome the one and only kobe bryant, everybody. ♪ ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> oh, man. >> jimmy: thank you for coming back to see us. and thank you, thank you, thank you for doing that slam poem. that was -- >> i don't know who is sitting here right now, man. [ cheers and applause ] i don't know if i'm kobe or kobay. kobe, kobay. >> jimmy: could be kobe or kobay. exactly. you have three little girls now. >> yeah, three little girls. >> jimmy: 14 -- >> 14, 10 and 4 months. >> jimmy: four months? >> yes. >> jimmy: oh, my gosh. >> we're both in the team no sleep right now. >> jimmy: yeah, no sleep. yeah. but all girls too, you know? but there's no -- no -- no male figures in the house besides you? >> nope. nope. >> jimmy: a dog, a pet, anything? >> well, there's one dog but he's a dwarf lab so. he doesn't have much say so in the house. >> jimmy: he doesn't say no. >> yeah. >> jimmy: do you get to control the tv or that's gone? >> no. i think i do until they actually come in the room and then it's like, give it up. >> jimmy: yeah. what are you watching now like teen nick and stuff? >> yeah, well, we're big on disney, man. so like one of our favorite shows, "stuck in the middle" we'll watch that all day long. >> jimmy: yeah, yeah, yeah. yeah, i watch that too. it's just always on. >> singing the songs and stuff. you're on there kind of singing and dancing and stuff. >> jimmy: i'm so -- i'm happy we're -- and i'm not saying this is bad at all but i'm so happy i'm over "dora the explorer." >> oh, yeah. >> jimmy: because i love her. i love backpack, i love the whole thing. >> let's go! jump in! vamanos. >> jimmy: no. no. stop, no, please no. no, no. i'm never going to get it out of my head. >> oh, come on. >> jimmy: just got it out of my head now. >> everybody knows the song. everybody knows the song. >> jimmy: but like -- ♪ i'm the map i'm the map i'm the map ♪ >> oh yea. ♪ boom boom boom boom boom ♪ >> jimmy: oh, my god. we get it. you're the map, yeah, exactly. the bass line. >> just tell me where to go. >> jimmy: just please just tell me where to go. mountain, stream, castle. okay. we'll do it. let's go. let's go. vamanos. vamanos. [ light laughter ] gosh. so happy i'm over that. [ cheers and applause ] i love that you're always trying new things now. you're doing all this new stuff. i still think -- i don't think that you're retired in my brain because you're so young and i think you're still the best basketball player out there, right now. but i mean -- i think you can -- [ cheers and applause ] can we work together with the help of your fans, let's get -- can we work on a deal and get you back for like ten games a a year? [ cheers and applause ] just through the playoffs. just come in, do the playoffs, leave and then win a a championship. just, no? >> no, i stopped at -- that's it. >> jimmy: that's it, right. do you ever watch the games and think, i could probably do that one? >> no. i watch through the lens of my daughter, man. she loves playing basketball. we watch basketball, we'll watch it together, that sort of thing. with both of my -- both of our daughters, natalia and gianna when they started playing, you now i'm like, maybe you should like shoot like this a little bit. they're like, i got this. i'm like, dude. >> jimmy: i'm me. [ laughter ] seriously? >> seriously. when ever there's like a little break in the action i'm like hey, miha, miha, let me tell you, come here. hey, when you get the rebound, you should do this. she's like, but the coach said -- i'm like, oh, god. [ laughter ] what am i doing here? >> jimmy: shut up, dad. get out of here. >> you don't know nothing. you don't know anything. >> jimmy: just wait for me in the car. >> tiger dad, tiger dad, tiger dad. >> jimmy: tiger dad. >> not me. i didn't do it. >> jimmy: i got to talk about this movie you made "dear basketball." i loved it. it's a beautiful animated short. who did the animation for you? >> glen keane. >> jimmy: glen keane. >> glen keane. he's animated things like "beauty and the beast," "little mermaid," "pocahontas." >> jimmy: little films. >> little films. that's all. >> jimmy: tiny, tiny little things. >> that's all he did. he didn't do anything else. >> jimmy: but it's based on the poem you wrote when you realized it will be your last year playing called "dear basketball." and it is so moving. it starts as a little kid. and i remember doing this, but -- not with your dad's socks. but you took your dad's socks and rolled it up into a ball. >> yeah. >> jimmy: and used the sock as a basketball to shoot. and i remember doing that. and i go, oh, my gosh. it's so -- it's such a good memory and it put me right back to being a a kid. >> yeah. >> jimmy: and it shows this kid throwing a sock turning into a a man throwing a basketball. and it's just, wow. >> it's just the growth. it's the growth starting out, having a dream. and then being able to see that dream come to fruition. but then also understand that there's a finality to that dream. i can't play basketball forever. understanding that the love that i've had from the age of two to 37 has to change, has to move on. and finding the acceptance of letting something go. >> jimmy: i mean, that must have been tough. i mean, 'cause i can just imagine people pulling you from all angles going, just stay five more years and stay until you can't -- limping. >> but then, when do you decide when is enough? when is enough? you know what i mean? it's like the big question. so you just make a decision. once i made the decision. i had to ask myself, do i want to play next season, yes or no, and the answer was no. and it was like, okay, there. >> jimmy: and how did you get involved with these animators and john williams? >> yeah, john williams scoring. >> jimmy: he does the music. john williams, who did little movies again, "star wars," "jaws," "e.t." >> "superman," "harry potter." small things. >> jimmy: just small, tiny things. how did you even hook up with him? >> well john, i reached out to john years ago because i just wanted to talk to him about how he composed because i believe there was some kind of connection between how he orchestrates with how i can possibly conduct a basketball game and putting guys in the right position. there's something to be learned from that. and so he and i -- >> jimmy: would you just cold call people? >> i just cold called him, yeah. >> jimmy: and just say hey, like who else did you call? did you just call -- >> people at random all the time. oprah and just reaching out to people. >> jimmy: you call oprah and go hey? >> well, yeah. if you want to learn something, best way to learn is reach out and ask. john was just unbelievable and teaching me how to put things in certain areas and how he went about doing it. so we already had that relationship. and then, i said hey i made -- i wrote a short film. i would love for you to score it. and john, if you ever heard him speak, i mean he's just so calm. and he's just like, you know, i read the piece and it was marvelous and i'd love to do it. i just have to get through this "star wars" thing, and then i'd love to -- [ laughter ] >> jimmy: you're like yeah, okay, yeah. let's get through that "star wars" thing. >> is that a yes? >> jimmy: yeah. >> what are you saying? >> jimmy: you get goosebumps listening to his score and even when the film is just showing the credits at the end, i got goosebumps. because it's just well done. congrats on this. always doing something different. always moving forward. i love you. we have a clip from the new animated short film called "dear basketball" created by kobe bryant. check this out. ♪ >> from the moment i started rolling my dad's tube socks and shooting imaginary game winning shots in the great western forum, i knew one thing was real. i fell in love with you. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: more with kobe bryant after the break. stick around, everybody. this is fun. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ no splashing! wait, so you got rid of verizon, just like that? uh huh. i switched to t-mobile, kept my phone everything on it oh, they even paid it off! wow! yeah, it's nice that every bad decision doesn't have to be permanent! now you can ditch verizon but keep your phone. we'll even pay it off when you switch to t-mobile. schick hydro ® technology that transforms. schick hydro ® protecting mankind, one face at a time. welcome to maxx you. you are whimsical, vibrant, statement making. we see what makes you unique. so we have something for everyone, at a price that's just right for you. maxx you. maxx life. t.j.maxx ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: welcome back. we're hanging out with kobe bryant, ladies and gentlemen. [ cheers and applause ] kobe, we were all introduced to a talented young kid during this year's ncaa men's basketball tournament. his name is max bonnstetter. he's 13 years old and he surprised south carolina coach frank martin with this insightful question. take a look at this. >> max bonnstetter, "sports illustrated" for kids. coach, congratulations on the win tonight. when you coach and teach your team defense, what's more important, technique or attitude? >> first of all, a lot of respect to you. that's a heck of a question. i've been doing this a long time, and that's the first time anyone's ever asked me that. that's a heck of a question. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: i love that. right? >> terrific. >> jimmy: wait till you meet this guy. we thought it would be fun to have max come out and ask you a a few questions. >> yeah, yeah. >> jimmy: you up for that? >> oh, absolutely. >> jimmy: alright, let's go -- >> i'm going to get smart questions for once. [ light laughter ] wait. i'm not talking about this guy. [ laughter ] because nothing we do here -- >> jimmy: yeah, we'll tell -- he'll tell us later. >> nothing we do here is smart. i just did a slam poetry reading for crying out loud. >> jimmy: let's give a warm "tonight show" welcome to "s.i. kids" reporter max bonnstetter, everybody. ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: max, welcome to the show. >> thank you. >> jimmy: you look great. thank you for dressing up. >> thank you so much for having me. oh, my gosh. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: tell us a little bit about yourself first. where are you from? >> i'm 13 years old, i'm from new jersey. i go to school -- [ cheers ] i go to school at pope john middle school. i love basketball and all sports, and i've been a a reporter for about a year now. >> jimmy: that's amazing. [ cheers and applause ] do you have a little brother who is backstage. what's his name? >> his name is ben, and he's a a great brother. >> jimmy: there you go. alright so you have some questions for kobe? >> i do, yes. >> jimmy: alright, let's go for it, max. >> these are going to be really hard but -- alright -- >> alright. >> okay, kobe, you were an nba star as a teenager. what was it like having a giant paycheck at such a young age? [ laughter ] i don't get paid. >> okay. [ laughter ] not yet. >> jimmy: we've got to e-mail "s.i. kids" and talk to them. >> yeah, yeah. it was awesome. worse problems to have. so yeah, it was pretty cool, yeah. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: what was the first thing you bought? do you remember what you bought? >> what was the first thing i bought? i bought nothing, actually. i put it in the bank and i saved it. >> jimmy: nice, that's a good one right there. that's good. [ applause ] [ laughter ] >> who is the defender that you least wanted to go up against, and the person that you saw in your nightmares? [ light laughter ] >> saw in my nightmares? yikes. huh. well, tony allen is the toughest defender i've ever had to go against. he was absolutely tenacious, and, wow, defender i see in my nightmares? >> what about kawhi? you just tweeted about him. >> kawhi was awesome. i didn't get a chance to play -- you know who i see in my nightmares? i see shaquille o'neal's lip sync battle. [ laughter ] that's what i see in my nightmares. that -- yeah. i mean him shuffling around like that. >> jimmy: yeah, yeah, yeah. that was good -- scares you a little bit. >> that will scare anyone -- you know. >> alright, i think we all want to know who is the next kobe bryant? >> well, it's the -- let's see. well kawhi leonard is amazing. i love kawhi. i love james harden, i love russell westbrook, but hopefully they'll take the game above and beyond anything that i've ever accomplished, and continue to have the game to get better, and better, and better, and i think it will. >> what about devin booker? i mean he just hit 70. >> booker's amazing -- >> jimmy: alright max, give him a break, i mean come on. let him slide here. [ laughter ] >> devin booker, scoring 70 points is a lot of points. >> okay, now we've got the rapid fire. i hope you're ready. okay. now, what sport would you rather play, golf or basketball? >> basketball. >> but golf is a sport you play for life? come on. >> that is true. that is true. that's a good point. i hadn't quite thought about that. i'm still going to have to lean towards basketball. but it's a tough one. >> all right, all right, okay. "beauty and the beast," or "moana?" >> oh, come on. ♪ i've been staring at the edge of the water ♪ [ cheers and applause ] it just comes out. house with three baby girls. you know, you just -- there it is. just comes out. but i'm going to have to say "beauty and the beast" because it's such a timeless classic. ♪ little town it's a quiet ♪ no i'm just kidding -- >> you'd make a great -- ♪ no one's slick as gaston no one's quick as gaston ♪ ♪ >> yeah, yeah. we had a moment. we had a moment. we had a moment. >> jimmy: we had a moment. >> kobe here would make a great beast. would you rather have a big steal or a nasty block? >> a nasty block. yeah, nasty block. >> all right. >> ooh get that out of here. >> okay, this one's hard. would you rather be the mvp, or win a championship? >> win a championship for sure. >> well, you deserve both every season. >> thank you. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: aw, good guy. hey, our thanks to "s.i. kids" reporter max bonnstetter. that was fantastic, max. great job, buddy. >> thank you so much for having me. >> jimmy: the one and only kobe bryant right here. [ cheers and applause ] kathryn hahn joins us after the break. stick around, everybody. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ ♪ ♪since i came to know you baibe ♪i've been telling you how sweet you're.♪ ♪i've been telling you how good you're.♪ ♪please tell me how i look. ♪you look so good, fantastic man.♪ ♪ t my license! (cheering) woo! going on my first targetrun. need anything? laundry detergent! toothpaste! i'll get my purse. ok, nana. get everyday low prices on everyday essentials, targetrun and done. the seal you can trust. with stain and sealer in one... and easy to choose colors... exceptional beauty and protection have never been easier. thompson's waterseal stain and sealer. available at national retailers. i decided to see if there was a way for design to play a... ...positive role in what was going on in the world. there's a jacket that's reflective for visibility... ...a sleeping bag jacket, jackets that turn into tents. i usually do my fashion sketches on the computer. i love drawing on the screen. there's no lag time at all. it feels just like my markers. with fashion, you can dress people and help people. it's really cool to see your work come to life. he's got a condo. he's got a car. he's got a career. but that still doesn't mean he gets you. time to shine. orbit. xter ate my slippers, i'm going on a targetrun, you need anything? toilet paper... cereal... maybe some chew toys... got it! get everyday low prices on everyday essentials, targetrun and done. or make a backseat...thatg feels nothing like a backseat. why give it every feature you could want... along with a few you didn't know you needed. it's simple. you can build a car, or you can build a cadillac. from the time i was pregnant with him, had so much life and energy in him. he wanted out, and he wanted to conquer the world. right now, quinton's goal is to be a doctor. it's not easy being a single parent with three kids and having to provide for them. but my son will be an amazing doctor, and he'll help people that are less fortunate. no matter where you are in your college journey, sallie mae can help you find the money you need. ♪"my friends know me so well. they can tell what i'm thinking, just by looking in my eyes. but what they didn't know was that i had dry, itchy eyes. i used artificial tears from the moment i woke up... ...to the moment i went to bed. so i finally decided to show my eyes some love,... ...some eyelove. eyelove means having a chat with your eye doctor about your dry eyes because if you're using artificial tears often and still have symptoms, it could be chronic dry eye. it's all about eyelove, my friends. ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: you know our next guest from her work on the golden globe award winning show "transparent," and movies like "anchorman" and "bad moms." starting may 12th you can see her along with kevin bacon in the new amazon series, "i love dick." ladies and gentlemen, please welcome kathryn hahn. ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> hi. >> jimmy: oh, i'm so happy you are here. >> finally. hi you guys. >> jimmy: i am your biggest fan. >> oh this is neat. >> jimmy: welcome, welcome to "the tonight show." please, they love you. >> oh, my god, you guys. [ cheers and applause ] bucket list. check it right off. >> jimmy: i'm so happy. you look gorgeous. >> oh, thank you. >> jimmy: welcome to the show. >> thank you. >> jimmy: we have something in common. >> yeah. >> jimmy: we both lived in kind of the same neighborhood, right? in hell's kitchen? >> yep, 49th between eighth and ninth. i think -- >> jimmy: 50th between eighth and ninth. oh, wait a second. wait -- >> gourmet garage. >> jimmy: yes. >> what else? worldwide plaza. >> jimmy: worldwide plaza. blockheads burritos. >> island burgers and shakes, but no french fries. >> jimmy: no fires, that's right. >> right. >> jimmy: because why? they couldn't -- >> why? they just -- something about the fire. they couldn't have a fryer. >> jimmy: wait, you used to go to allen burgers? >> yes, i love that. it's the best. >> jimmy: i love allen burgers. >> it's still there? >> jimmy: yes, it has to be. >> oh, my god, it has to be. >> jimmy: it has to be. if there is a god. >> if there is a god. i used to go to gourmet garage and it was the first time i'd ever seen like an olive, like, you know, like where you can just get olives, you know, your own kind of olives. >> jimmy: yeah like -- >> you know what i mean. >> jimmy: like a salad bar >> like a salad bar but, like olives, and we would just go like, steal so many olives. >> jimmy: yeah, of course gourmet garage. >> gourmet garage. >> jimmy: i don't know if that's still around. >> that is still around. do you remember there was a a theater apparently at the worldwide plaza in which there was a show maybe called like gazillion bubble shower or something. and we always wanted to get really stoned and go but we never did. >> jimmy: i do kind of remember that. >> but, anyway. >> i know the talent there. when i first moved there, there was no -- there was video stores, but there were no non-adult video stores. >> oh, right, right. >> jimmy: i couldn't rent a a normal movie. i would go in and go, do you have anything -- >> listen, my hands were tied. i had nothing -- >> jimmy: i had to do it. >> there was nothing i could do. sorry. just stacks of dvds. adult. >> jimmy: well, i loved everything -- i just want to quickly mention how great you are in "stepbrothers," "we're the millers." "captain fantastic," "bad moms," "anchorman," "how to lose a guy in ten days," "transparent," and now "i love dick" which is -- [ light laughter ] >> oh, come on, people. it's a gentleman's name. >> jimmy: i know -- >> this gentleman saying we had a president we use to call tricky dick. >> jimmy: now, it's a meme. we used to, that's correct. but it -- it was an amazon pilot. i watched it with griffin dunne. >> yeah. >> jimmy: fantastic, and it's jill soloway who did it right? >> yes. >> jimmy: she did "transparent" -- >> yes, exactly. >> jimmy: and kevin bacon and you get together in this weird cool place that really exists. >> yes, martha, texas. >> jimmy: martha, texas. >> yeah, it's like three hours outside of el paso. it's like this -- it feels like you're on an island in the middle of the desert and it's just -- it's like brooklyn in like -- it's very hip, very unforgiving landscape, and there's a crazy amazing art scene there. so basically it's like a sexy love triangle between myself, griffin dunne who plays my hubby, and the titular dick, played by kevin bacon. >> jimmy: ah, titular. >> yeah. titular dick. you don't hear that word -- >> no, but i feel like we should hear it more. >> jimmy: by the way, titular dick is one of the movies i would rent. [ laughter ] my hands were tied. >> your hands were tied. >> jimmy: what am i supposed to do? >> there was no other -- >> jimmy: what am i supposed to do? i want to show a clip and i want to spend more time with you but -- >> let's do both. >> jimmy: all right. let's do both. i'm going to spend time watching this clip. here's kathryn hahn in "i love dick." take a look at this. >> at long last. >> the only one. oh, wow, see, this is a real gentleman. don't you dare yank this out and make me fall on my ass. >> i'm sorry. >> that was just a dumb joke. oh, wow. there we go. >> they only have a menu tonight. i hope you're okay with rabbit. >> oh great. i love rabbit. big game eater. >> never seen her eat game in my life. >> i'm not -- all right. okay, not a big, big, big, big game eater. i'm a big little game eater. i love cornish hens. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: kathryn hahn, everybody. "i love dick" premieres may 12th on amazon prime video. big boi performs for us next. stick around, everybody. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ ♪ ♪ award winning interface. award winning design. award winning engine. the volvo xc90. the most awarded luxury suv of the century. visit your volvo dealer to take advantage of our midsommar sales event offer. visit your volvo dealer to take advantage donat gnc's lowest pricesnds of the season sale great products for every goal at this seasons biggest savings plus free cash back rewards sale ends june 7th change begins here one new gnc ♪ [ cheers and applause ] jimmy: he is a seven-time grammy award-winning artist whose new album, "boomiverse," is due this summer. he's here with his tv debut of his new single, "mic jack." with a little help from the roots, give it up for big boi! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ ♪ jump up jump up jump up jump up ♪ ♪ yeah let's go ♪ ♪ pimping still ain't messing with hollywood court but stay messing with your boy like ♪ ♪ the hollywood smoke everything big no coming up short jacked the buzzer beater up all net ♪ ♪ half court half court the game winning shot your name thinning out ♪ ♪ that same skinny thot you got she be in and out she never spit it out either we call her trophy mouth ♪ ♪ big mouth ass thighs that that ♪ ♪ i build a bear before i build her i take her to the mall and fill her with the sugar stick ♪ ♪ with the cane that she give her pimp her sugar with ♪ ♪ give me brain so intelligent with plenty sense i give her innocence ♪ ♪ and she was turnt out and by the time i gave her back she was burnt out ♪ ♪ like the tires of a huracan you ain't good as twan or better yet say great we stay putting on ♪ ♪ you're hotter than july super colder than december so cold you got me dancing ♪ ♪ yeah yeah ♪ the dance floor tells no lie tells no lie ♪ ♪ give them something to remember yeah yeah you got me dancing ♪ ♪ come on brian ♪ please don't stop moving your feet while the music's high on that ecstasy ♪ ♪ yeah yeah ♪ we can dance all night till we both get weak come on come on ♪ ♪ staying fresh that's the game plan out the oven 'cause we never microwaving ♪ ♪ we break it up like the smile of michael strahan and keep shining like the glove on michael j.'s hand ♪ ♪ i do not play man i'll eat your up quick i'm on that boss rap they on that toss salad ♪ ♪ old chicken caeser you're following without a leader i used to have a bench full of but didn't need them ♪ ♪ but still fill arenas and killing the coliseum atl-iens stay on top if you're human beings ♪ ♪ from the mother ship low key like to blow soul back in '86 but we don't sell dope ♪ ♪ we pimp ink pens to provoke the folks and keep them thinking what is you drinking or better yet ♪ ♪ do you really know the meaning of life or are you sleeping ♪ ♪ ow yeah yeah yeah ♪ ♪ ♪ come on ♪ ♪ ♪ i got nothing but love for you ♪ ♪ you're hotter than july super hot super colder than december so cold ♪ ♪ you got me dancing yeah yeah tells no lie tells no lie ♪ ♪ give them something to remember yeah you got me dancing ♪ ♪ hotter than july super colder than december so cold you got me dancing ♪ ♪ yeah yeah the dance floor tells no lie tells no lie tells it something to remember ♪ ♪ yeah you got me dancing what are we doing brian ♪ ♪ please don't stop moving don't even please don't stop moving you got me dancing ♪ ♪ dance all night till we both get weak come on please don't stop you got me dancing ♪ ♪ yeah yeah come on come on yeah whoo yeah ♪ ♪ we won't stop till the morning ♪ ♪ whoo hey we won't stop keep it going yeah yeah ♪ ♪ we're gonna see it through and the rest is up to you yeah yeah ♪ ♪ >> boomiverse is coming soon. yeah! [ cheers and applause ] come on, baby. >> jimmy: come on. big boi! [ cheers and applause ] "mic jack" is available now. pick it up. my thanks to kobe bryant, kathryn hahn, max bonnstetter! big boi once again! >> yeah! [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: "mic jack" and the roots right there, all the way from philadelphia, pennsylvania! there you go. [ cheers and applause ] stay tuned for "late night with seth meyers." thank you for watching. have a great night. hope to see you tomorrow. bye-bye, everybody. [ cheers and applause ] ♪

Related Keywords

Mexico , New York , United States , El Paso , Texas , South Carolina , Brooklyn , Pennsylvania , Philadelphia , Washington , Hollywood , California , Jersey , San Francisco , Charles Barkley , Aziz Ansari , Paul Rudd Steve , Putin Steve , Kobe Bryant , Vladimir Putin , Keane Jimmy , Dick Jimmy , George Washington , Richard Simmons , Jimmy Fallon , Sallie Mae , Paul Rudd , Devin Booker , Tony Allen , Plaza Jimmy , Jill Soloway , Glen Keane , Alexa Steve , Pocahontas Jimmy , Angeles Lakers , Kardashian Steve , Steve Stefan , Kevin Spacey , Bryant Kathryn Hahn , Shaquille Oneal , Hmm Jimmy , Seth Meyers , John Williams , William H Macy , Harry Potter , Griffin Dunne , Kim Kardashian , Kathryn Hahn , Ferdinand Magellan ,