Best picture last night after the award was mistakenly presented to la la land due to an envelope mixup. Yet another embarrassing defeat for perennial loser ryan gosling. [ laughter ] thats right, moonlight won best picture last night at the academy awards. While the award for most pictures went to gary from chicago. [ cheers and applause ] give it up for gary, everybody. President trump today once again denied any ties to moscow, saying he hasnt called russia in ten years. But that doesnt mean he hasnt texted. [ laughter ] President Trump today said, quote, nobody knew that health care could be so complicated. I knew, said a woman punching a tree in the woods. [ laughter ] White House PressSecretary Sean Spicer recently checked his aides cell phones to ensure they werent communicating with reporters and leaking information to the press. And while he didnt find the leaker, he did learn hes in everyones phone as, hungover peyton manning. [ laughter ] ate too much papa johns. A new study has been published providing more evidence that straight women have fewer orgasms than men during sex. Still no word why that study was stuck on my fridge. [ laughter ] really passive aggressive, i thought. Today was National Kahlua day. Celebrate by having a White Russian interfere with your election. [ laughter ] a new Study Suggests that not all psychopaths are bad. Thank you, said people who pour the milk in before the cereal. An orange alligator recently discovered in North Carolina has been named donnie, after President Trump. Not to be confused with the reptile that was named donnie by President Trump. [ laughter and applause ] President Trump said today he is going to save people from obamacare. Kind of like how that iceberg rescued the titanic from having to go to new york. [ laughter ] a new gym will open in San Francisco that encourages people to smoke marijuana while exercising. Im sorry, but if im smoking weed, these are the only crunches im doing. [ laughter ] thats right, a new jim will encourage people to smoke marijuana while exercising. Hey, can you spot me, bro . Yeah, youre right there. [ laughter ] consider yourself spotted. [ light laughter ] we got a great show for you tonight, everybody [ cheers and applause ] he is starring in the new groups production of, evening at the talkhouse, at the Pershing Square signature center, here in new york city. Matthew broderick is back on the show, one of our favorites. [ cheers and applause ] you know him from foxs bones. David boreanaz is on the show tonight. [ cheers and applause ] and we have music from an incredible singersongwriter and pianist, Regina Spektor is here everybody. [ cheers and applause ] fantastic evening for us tonight. We mentioned it briefly, but so much, so much happened in the oscars, last night we couldnt possibly fit it in the monologue. So here with a recap is one of our writers, amber ruffin, in a segment we call, amber says what . [ cheers and applause ] yay thanks, seth first off, last nights oscars were insane the dresses alone had me like, what . And, what . And what . [ laughter ] dwayne the rock johnson was looking perfect in his velvet jacket. And had everybody like, what . [ laughter ] then the girl from, moana sang that song and it was so beautiful, and i was like what . Then she got hit upside the head with one of those waves and i was like, whahahahat . [ laughter ] and then they did the in memoriam, and i was like, what . And it turned out they made a mistake and one of those people is still alive. [ laughter ] and you know she was watching the oscars and saw herself in the in memoriam and was like, what . [ laughter ] then Warren Beatty opened the envelope for best picture and was looking at the card like, what . What, wait, what . [ laughter ] then faye dunaway was like, la la land [ laughter ] so they went up there and gave their speech, and they were like what what what. What, what, what, what, what. But i was at home like, this is what . I felt like when adele won over beyonce for best album. [ audience ohs ] yeah. Then they were like, the actual winner of this award is, moonlight and the world was like, what [ laughter ] then, moonlight, accepted the oscar like whatwhat then ryan gosling is like, what ever, im still ryan gosling. [ laughter ] this has been, amber says, what [ cheers and applause ] seth amber ruffin, everybody [ cheers and applause ] now, before we move on, President Trump will address congress for the first time on tuesday to discuss his agenda. Which could be difficult, since his agenda so far has consisted largely of complaints about the media. For more on this, it as time for a closer look. Seth before we get to that, though, its the day after the oscars. Which means its time for the annual ritual of conservative pundits complaining about the oscars. Former Arkansas Governor Mike Huckabee who took a stab at humor with this tweet, watch the celebs spew ignorant political venom at oscars . Nah, i think id rather have a colonoscopy. Both happen from the same location. Same location . So if anyone looked disappointed last night, its not because they lost. Its beause the spent the night, i guess, inside Mike Huckabees asshole . [ laughter ] but more importantly, President Trump is set to give his first address to congress tomorrow, outlining his agenda for the country. Today at the white house, he previewed some of the things we can expect to hear. And as is customary for any trump appearance, it was a little all over the place. For example trump previewed a new infrastructure plan, not by explaining its benefits, but by describing his trip through the lincoln tunnel. Our highways, our bridges are unsafe. Our tunnels, we have tunnels in new york where the tiles are on the ceiling and you see many tiles missing. And you wonder, youre driving 40 Miles Per Hour, 50 Miles Per Hour through a tunnel. And i say to myself, ever time i drive through, i wonder how many people are hurt or injured where theyre driving at 40, 50 Miles Per Hour through a tunnel and the tile falls off. And theres so many missing tiles. [ laughter ] seth first of all, 50 Miles Per Hour is too fast to drive through a tunnel. So tell your driver to slow the [ bleep ] down. [ laughter ] second of all, its the lincoln tunnel. Even with all the tiles, its going to be lousy. Dont waste money beautifying lost causes. [ as trump ] were also going to make all the rats in the subway wear tuxedos. So thats going to really class up that operation. [ laughter ] trump also talked briefly about one of the most anticipated topics in tomorrows speech, health care. Republicans are moving forward with a plan to repeal obamacare, and yet its unclear what if anything theyll replace it with. And trump basically seemed to admit the problem was an a little tougher to deal with than he anticipated. We have come up with a solution thats really, really, i think very good. Now i have to tell you. Its an unbelievably complex subject. Nobody knew that health care could be so complicated. [ audience ohs ] [ laughter ] seth nobody knew health care could be so complicated . The only way that sentence could be more terrifying is if you heard it just as the anesthesia was kicking in. [ laughter ] then theres the question of what kind of tone we can expect from trumps speech tomorrow. Up to now, when trump has discussed actual policy, he usually does so in bleak terms. As he did in his inaugural address. And today in a rare public appearance on the today show, former president george w. Bush was asked about the bleak tone of trumps remarks, and didnt seem to take it all too seriously. You sat at the inauguration, you listened to President Trumps inaugural address. And he talked about american carnage. Yeah. [ chuckles ] and the fact [ laughter ] seth hes either laughing at the phrase american carnage or remembering how much trouble he had at the inauguration with his poncho. [ laughter ] but of course the main problem with trump preparing to talk about his agenda tomorrow, is that for the first month of his presidency, his agenda has consisted mostly of attacks on the media. Attacks he repeated yet again this weekend. Bush was asked about those attacks and replied with what was widely seen as a rebuke to trump. I consider the media to be indispensable to democracy. That we need an independent media to hold people like me to account. I mean, power can be very addictive, and it can be corrosive, and its important for the media to call to account people who abuse their power. Seth its amazing that that basic platitude about democracy and a free press is now considered a brave criticism of our president. Soon people are going to start referring to this w. Moment as a soaring call for national unity. I know that human beings and fish can coexist peacefully. [ laughter ] seth he was the first president to bravely call for a truce between human and fish. [ laughter ] who knew that two decades later a squid would be working in the white house. [ cheers and applause ] so thats where we are right now. Just saying that a free press is vital to democracy is now considered a brave statement. And its because donald trump wont stop whining about the media. Like on friday, in a speech to the conservative Political Action conference, trump claimed as he has repeatedly that when the press reports negative stories about him, and cites unnamed sources, theyre making those stories up. And those sources dont actually exist. They have no sources. They just make them up when they have none. I saw one story recently where they said, nine people have confirmed. There were no nine people. I dont believe there was one or two people. Nine people. And i said give me a break. cause i know the people. I know who they talked to. There were no nine people. But they say nine people. And somebody reads it, and they thing oh, nine people. They have nine sources. They make up sources. Seth hes so sure its not nine people. [ laughter ] [ as trump ] there cant be nine sources because we havent even hired nine people yet. The only people who work at the white house are, me, spicy, kellyanne, fredrick douglas, and that guy whos always telling me to shut my [ bleep ] mouth. Hes a bad dude. He scares me, that guy. [ laughter ] but this claim trump keeps making that the media just makes up sources to publish fake news, doesnt even make sense according to trumps own logic. Because while he claims the press is making up fake sources, he also claims that there are real leakers in the federal government, and that the real leakers should be caught and punished. Like when he tweeted on friday, the fbi is totally unable to stop the National Security leakers. Classified information is being given to media that could have a devastating effect on u. S. Find now [ laughter ] this whole leak thing is turning trump into tarzan, find now leaks bad melania wife where melania . Trump sad [ laughter ] but despite trumps claims that the media makes up source, his white house seems to think the leaks are very real. So real that theyve become paranoid about them, leading White House PressSecretary Sean Spicer to try to crack down. According to politico, press Secretary Sean Spicer met with about a dozen of his communication staffers last week to voice frustration over recent leaks. In that meeting, staffers were reportedly told to dump their government issued and personal phones for a phone check to prove they had nothing to hide. Seth but really, the best part of this story is this. Spicer also warned the group of more problems if news of the phone checks and the meeting about leaks was leaked to the media. [ laughter ] so, spicer tried to crack down on leaks, by holding a meeting about leaks, warning people not to leak about the meeting about the leaks. And then his warning about the leaks was leaked to the media. [ laughter ] its like theyre trying to bail out a sinking rowboat with a spaghetti strainer. [ laughter ] and in addition to attacking the media and cracking down on leaks, trump also announced on saturday that he would not attend the annual white house Correspondents Dinner this year. White house spokes person, Sarah Huckabee sanders explained his decision this way. Its kind of naive of us to think that we can all walk no a room for a couple hours and pretend that the tension isnt there. You know, one of the things we say in the south. If a girl scout egged your house, would you buy cookies from her . Seth okay. One of the things we say in the north is, if a girl scout eggs your house, it might be time to take a look in the mirror. In fairness her father is mike huckabee, so its possible that girl scouts did possibly throw eggs at her house. Your tweets suck dude [ laughter ] even in small ways, trumps distanced himself from the press. On saturday for example, he ditched a group of reporters who were supposed to cover all the president s movements, and went to dinner at his hotel in d. C. But a reporter who made a reservation near trump observed his dinner and wrote about what he saw. For example, at around 8 45, a waiter told the reporter, the president ordered a welldone steak, an aged new york strip. He ate it with ketchup, as he always does. At one point, the president looked at his watch and remarked, theyre filming saturday night live right now. Cant wait to see what theyre gonna do to me this week. Okay. He ordered a welldone steak and put ketchup on it. And he thinks that snl is filmed at 8 45. Weve officially elected everybodys grandpa. [ laughter ] maybe the weirdest anecdote from the evening was this story about a trump fan who briefly spoke to the president. One woman shouts at him, donald, its my birthday trump stops and says, happy birthday. As he hugs the elated woman. How bout a birthday present, lets take a photo, he says to her. Afterwards telling the woman she looks very young and has great skin. Great skin . Thats like something buffalo bill would say to one of his victims. [ laughter ] you have great skin. Put the ketchup in the basket. Tomorrows a huge opportunity for trump. He has a chance to sell americans on his agenda rather than whine about the free press. And hell have the weight of history on his shoulders. After all, hell have to live up to inspiring words like this. I know that human beings and fish can coexist peacefully. Seth this has been a closer look. 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Hes a drumming legend whos highly influential and world renowned playing can be heard with such Iconic Artists like, frank zappa, herbie hancock, sting, and jeff beck to name just a few. Vinnie colaiuta is here. Give it up for vinnie, everybody. [ cheers and applause ] thanks so much for being here. Our first guest tonight is a Tony Award Winning actor you know from films like, Ferris Buellers day off, election, and glory. He stars in the new groups off production offbroadway production of evening at the talk house which is playing at the Pershing Square signature center. Please welcome back to the show, our friend matthew broderick, everybody. [ cheers and applause ] seth how are you . Im pretty good. Im pretty good. Seth im so happy to have you here. Me too. Seth so, weve talked about your friendship with Kenneth Lonergan before, on the show. Yeah. Seth he wrote and directed manchester by the sea. Thats right. Seth and he won a film you were in. And you were wonderful in. Thank you. Seth and he won an oscar, for the screenplay. Was that exciting for you . It sure was. Seth yeah. Yeah, it was amazing. Seth youve known him since you guys were kids. Since we were 15. Seth thats pretty great. We went to high school together. We did little plays in high school. And hes all grownup now. Seth yeah. He won an academy award. Seth he won an academy award. Yet you made the observation and i didnt. Yeah. Seth you you didnt. Yeah. Yeah. Seth because i feel were you not even nominated last night. No, i was not. Oh, yeah, no i wasnt. Yeah, i should say. Seth b