Transcripts For MSNBCW Unconditional 20240706 : comparemela.

[richard] whats up there, fella . See, im richard, your son. Let me put this amplifier on you. Test, test, test. How are you . Im richard. Stephen Mumbles yeah. Youre so good. Thank you. People Chattering how are you . Okay. You good . somber music all right, here it goes. Dont try to eat it now. Not bad, huh . somber music you like this, dont you . I know you like this. Soft Piano Music thats it, kiddo. Caring for dad is a challenge of physical and Mental Health. It was a lonely road until i found others. Do you have nightmares . Soft Piano Music tell us about the injury. [luke] my mind was a mess. We get lost in there. Just suicidal. With cancer, thats dangerous. Were everywhere. I wish i could be there for all of it. Im not ready. Me and matthew. Join energy. laughs have fun fall deeper in love. This is a common experience. Soft Piano Music Car Engines Rumbling okay, youre almost there. We have to. No, you have to throw your gum first. Throw your gum. Yeah. [carer] okay. Okay, brush your teeth now. Thank you. [carer] all right, okay. Okay, go again and then close this. Yes. Turn off. Use this one. Okay. laughs thank you. Youre so good. My first son, richard. Okay. Yes laughs you have to go walking now. Thank you, sir. Move forward, one. Oh, yeah. Two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight. The father ive known eight, seven. Has been disappearing. Electronic Bubbling mouses. Computer Dings still my dad, but our relationship is definitely changing. Electronic Bubbling babble. At age 15 when we were living on jackson street. Oh yeah. And went to indistinct . And then, i was baptized there. It was the greatest blessing throughout my whole life. There it is. Yeah. Its a beautiful one. Little by little, alzheimers, its basically just taking away little bits of his brain. Egyptian. All right. And maybe a little bit of me too. Group Chattering here we are at dinner with my aunts and uncles about eight years ago. And you can see him, he seems totally fine. But the youngest of his 12 siblings pulls me aside and says, hes forgetting our names. And not too much later, he was diagnosed with alzheimers and that started the road. Well get your mother. Well, shes gonna wait for us here cause were coming back. Okay. soft music when i saw you. Youre a big, big joy to me, richard good to see you too. I love you so much i love you too. Soft Piano Music its okay. You dont want gum. What . He was mid stage at that point. I think we get off here. We get off here. All right. My mom, it was taking care of an 84yearold child 24 hours a day. She needed my help because he kept wanting to leave and open doors and wander in the streets. Thats fresh tuna fish . Keep on eating subway sandwiches or going and buying donuts. Which one . Theres so many before. He drove straight through, all the way through that back wall. You know, he liked to poop everywhere. I clean up his poop and he had the strength to open up drawers and turn on stoves and try to open cans with a fork. Boom, boom, boom, boom, boom. And he did it. Soft Piano Music People Chattering hi, im richard lui, live at Msnbc Headquarters here in new york city. Thanks for being with us today. We just have some new information on the breaking news story. The Mass Shooting Come Out of el paso, texas. Ive been a journalist for 15 years. Were gonna continue next with Reverend Al Sharpton and politics nation. Stick around. Well be right back. All right. Right . The last second there, ron. Did you see that . I see. Oh, i tell ya. Being an anchor, you normally work eight days a week, 25 hours a day. Run. Run. Get out of here before its too late. I dont know, man. You know how it goes. Im not going anywhere. Haven. Hi. I went to my bosses and i said, you know, my dad just got diagnosed and i know where this is going. She and i came up with a plan so that i could work part time. So i work from Friday To Sunday and then monday i get up, to the airport, fly from new york to san francisco. Its a 10hour door to door. Immediately go to care for my dad. Thank you, sir. Fridays, i get up and i reverse the entire trip and thats three times a month, about 300,000 miles a year. January 20th, were taking a quick little walk. Say hello to baba. Yeah. Youre so good, i told you. Ah, youre so good, son. Soft Piano Music when i wasnt looking after my dad, i was learning from others what it meant to be a caregiver. Its critical to document the caregiver journey. To convey the impact on their physical, psychological, financial, and social wellbeing. Now its three phases. Yeah. And we start with becoming aware and adjusting. Yeah, which is the most difficult thing. It was probably three or four years before i began to selfidentify as a caregiver even though i was providing those did you say three or four years . Three or four years. Absolutely. The future we once planned its impossible now. Right. So were trying to build a new one thats just as good, maybe better. Its just hard coming to grips with the different part. They felt like they were on the same lonely road that i thought i was on. You dont take yourself. Im a caregiver for my husband whos a [richard] until we realized were everywhere. My children are or were ready to be caregivers. Wow, all no. Everybody is battling thats when i found amy bushatz. Shes also a journalist and her beat was caregiving stories. She was also living through it herself. Letting my local community understand about caregivers and thats not something that we do. The longer that i spend in my community in alaska, the more i see thats true. But the more they get to know me and they understand why this is important and so they get to know luke, right . And they get to see this is who he is and this is what we deal with at home and this is maybe the part that you dont see everyday. [richard] right. And so, i headed to alaska to see what amy and luke were living through at home. soft music soft music continues no, its sad that. Close enough. Yeah. Okay, good stuff. Hey, steve, i am hunting down some information about the childcare aware contract, which is, of course, the ones that gives the subsidy if childcare on base is full. When i married a guy in the military, my local news became Military Spouse and family issues. Ive been covering Military Spouse and family news about eight years now. Sailors and their families more money. Luke Speaks Indistinctly im making them some breakfast. You wanna do lunches . Sure. Cool. Its not super cold, so you could probably wear short sleeves with a sweatshirt if you want. Its like 34. Its warm laughs . Dave, eggs, table. Okay. Thank you, sir. Hucky, sit down, honey. You guys want some carrots . Not at all. [luke] not at all . All right, well, you have to have some carrots, okay . Dave, do you want yogurt . No. [luke] thank you, sir. Luke got out of the military on july 1, 2016. And as far as i was concerned, okay, he had some struggles, but hes not disabled. Lets go, big guy. Okay. We know he struggles with ptsd. We think he probably bonked his head a couple times. His neck hurts. Sometimes, he has headaches. Not a big deal, okay . So then, one day, at least in our house, you wake up and theres this huge sum of money in your bank account from the va. Hmm . What . Can i see the list . Mmhmm. Holy mother. Mmhmm. cause he has, at this point, gone through the process to be rated, you know, what are your disabilities . Yeah. And its just like this laundry list, page after page after page. Mild traumatic brain injury, percentage, description, cardiac disease, percentage, description. And we discovered that the va actually considers him not 100 disabled, more like 350 disabled. Dave got that yesterday from school. [luke] yeah, he got it yesterday. Is the only library book . And i found that really sad. I felt like i was now dealing with somebody who was proclaimed broken and i didnt know really how to process that and what to think about that. Its upstairs. Do you want a hat . Thank you. Get your backpack. Please go to school. I love you. I hope you have a great day. Okay. somber music yeah ah somber music limu emu doug what do we always say, son . Liberty mutual customizes your car insurance. So you only pay for what you need. Thats my boy. Now you get out there, and you make us proud, huh . Bye, uncle limu. Stay off the freeways only pay for what you need. Liberty. Liberty. Liberty. Liberty. vo when it comes to safety, who has more iihs top safety pick plus awards, the highest level of safety you can earn . Subaru. When it comes to longevity, who has the highest percentage of its vehicles still on the road after ten years . Subaru. And when it comes to value, which brand has the lowest cost of ownership, lower than toyota, honda, or hyundai . Subaru. Its easy to love a car you can trust. Its easy to love a subaru. What are folks 60 and older up to these days . Getting inspired volunteering playing pickleba. at tmobile, your business will save over 1000 bucks. What are you going to do with it . I could use a new sign. With tmobile for business, save more than 1000 bucks versus verizon. And get the new Samsung Galaxy s23 plus free with no tradein required. Bug spray works best. When your family actually wears it. Get odorfree eight hour protection from mosquitoes and ticks without the ick. Zevo onbody repellent. People love it. Bugs hate it. People love it. Wow, that mustve been tough. So, luke, tell us about the injury. I sustained my real bad tbis, traumatic brain injury, a decade ago, 2009. A big one would be my vehicle rolling over an ied and blowing up. Most ieds go up around a vehicle and theyre literally crushed by a Shockwave Inside of it. I was in a vehicle where i was crushed to the point that there were armored doors that blew off the vehicle and released the pressure. If they hadnt have been there, i would not be sitting here today to talk to you. I wouldve been turned into internal jello. bombs blast highpitched whirring but brain slams up against your skull and it is damaged, bruised, and needs time to recover. I probably shouldve went and laid down for 10 days in a dark tent, but i took some aspirin, went and threw up in my room, and went back to work the next day. highpitched whirring Objects Clattering Objects Clattering somber music i find healing in the mountains for myself mentally, emotionally, even physically. Check. After 10 years on active duty, of 10 years of war, we moved here knowing that it was going to help me heal and, therefore, or family to heal, to grow, to be better. We needed a fresh start. We needed to start over. Six, one. When we moved here in 2016 and he was home all the time thats when i really started noticing the forgetfulness. [luke] one nonlocking carabineer. Check. One nonlocking carabineer. Check. Multiple times, he would set his bag of pt stuff on the back of his car and drive away. Just a lot of stuff right and left. Like, where is it . Did you leave the stove on, you know . Just spacing out. He let our kids out for a walk and forgot they were gone. State trooper brought them back. It was very embarrassing. Probe, two sets. Avalung. Ski straps, ski straps, ski straps. 10 meters, one each. Sometimes, youre husband forgets things. My wife takes it for granted that i will forget things and is pleasantly surprised when i dont. Okay, brother, the reason im calling is i have a lot of redundant gear for the climb up hood. I think that covers a lot of the stuff youre gonna need outside of clothing other than a harness and a helmet. I think you should get your own helmet and your own okay. Harness. The only thing i recommend is you need to pick up your own harness and you need to pick up your own helmet. Okay, okay. So things that would be normal for other people, they dont think that way. Its almost as if going from a to z, i will go a, b, m, c, q, z. soft music its very tempting to be angry at him. I taught myself to stop and recalibrate. We are angry at the brain injury, we are not angry at luke. Now, i would love to be able to tell you that when hes being weird or crazy i think, oh, he must be having a headache, and, oh, lifes so hard for you. Like, lets be really understanding. That is not laughs at all what happens, inevitably, right . I say, you are acting like a psycho, so laughs . [luke] indistinct thats good, amy. No, its not good at all. Living with someone with a brain injury is very stressful. soft music how do i deal with that . How do you deal with that . Well, i mean, i see a therapist, so laughs . Staaaaacccceeeyyy im the sizzle in this promposal. And tonight, sparks are gonna fly. Kyle . And while romeo over here is trying to look cool, things are about to heat up. Uhoh. Darn it, kyle and if you dont have the right Home Insurance coverage, you could end up paying for this yourself. Sorry mr. Sanchez get allstate, and be better protected from mayhem, like me. Thats a hard no. Im still tasting whats next. Even with higher stroke risk due to afib not caused by a heart valve problem. So if theres a better treatment than warfarin. Im hungry for that. Eliquis. Eliquis reduces stroke risk better than warfarin. And has less major bleeding than warfarin. Eliquis has both. Dont Stop Taking Eliquis without talking to your doctor as this may increase your risk of stroke. Eliquis can cause serious and in rare cases fatal bleeding. Dont take eliquis if you have an Artificial Heart Valve or abnormal bleeding. While taking, you may bruise more easily. Or take longer for bleeding to stop. Get help right away for unexpected bleeding, or unusual bruising. It may increase your bleeding risk if you take certain medicines. Tell your doctor about all planned medical or dental procedures. The number one cardiologistprescribed blood thinner. Ask your doctor about eliquis. One prilosec otc each Morning Blocks heartburn all day and all night. Prilosec otc reduces excess acid for 24 hours, Blocking Heartburn before it starts. One pill a day. 24 hours. Zero heartburn. Blocking heartburn before it starts. soft music one pill a day. 24 hours. Zero heartburn. We register isolation, discord, alienation, in the exact same way that we register a physical threat. Over time, that can become difficulty with complicated thinking, communicating with other people, even displaying empathy. So in that way, our isolation can become self perpetuating. I happened to meet kate when she was an expert on my show. Joining me now is Kate Hendricks thomas, a former marine and board member of the Service Womens action network. She was the leading voice in the world of veteran wellness. Kate, when you were serving, were you aware of this . Well, the scale and the reach of the Current Issue is certainly larger than anything i faced while i was on active duty. cause when i was an officer of marines thinking back, i felt like the questions i needed to ask myself now emotionally were something she knew well. So i reached out to visit kate. soft music soft music continues im gonna try Something Different for dinner tonight. Oh, no. So wish me luck. Please dont. Hey, im trying to do something that matthew will eat. Thats my goal. Meatballs. Hello, honey bunny. Mama, can i eat something . Im gonna make dinner right now. Take your shoes off. You dont need shoes on in the house. Youre gonna try my meatballs. Mama, i want waffles. You can have waffles after meatballs. Mmhmm. I want the waffles and toast. You can have toast and meatballs. [shane] i mean, you gotta have protein, dude. [kate] go sit at your spot and wait. [shane] we first met when were at tuscaloosa. She was going for her phd. I had just gotten back from iraq and i was finishing up my masters degree. [kate] he was just a steady person of character and integrity and loyalty. In 2014, we got married. And matthew was born that same year. And it has been a whirlwind ever since. And about four weeks after he was born we moved to South Carolina so i could start my first job as a professor. [shane] she has written three books. She has done three ted talks. We make up about seven percent of the population. As long as i strove to be perfect, as long as i never used ramps on the obstacle course, i could be part of the club and i love that club. I focus, a lot of the time, on trying to make the transition back to civilian life easier for military women. [shane] her mission in life was trying to cater to people who were clearly in need. But i have to balance her out. She would constantly say, yes, and. But overexerted herself one too many times. You have something called innate resilience. [shane] and i cant always be there to be her guardrail. Its actually not bad, right . Youre pleading the fifth . laughs ill let the middle of the night tell me whether or not [kate] its not bad. Youre not gonna get food poisoned. No. No way. Youre right. Thats right. [kate] good . Thank you. Matthew teaches me well. soft music siren wails Monitor Beeping People Chattering why cant i get a recliner . Husband chairs arent made to be comfortable. Yeah. Except in the mall. Yeah. Then they are designed to be comfortable cause a happy husband means a happy wife. Mmhmm. Well i appreciate you being here. Its so hard to sit still for this whole thing. The oncologist said that it looked like somebody had taken kate and dipped her from head to toe, every bone in her body. She said, were looking at about six to 10 years. And my initial response was, you mean six to 10 years for the treatment to finally take effect or what do you mean . And she didnt answer. I realized that that was how long kates gonna be on this planet. Cancer attacks the person and it only has one mission.