[ laughter ] my other daughter. Shes 2 years old. Her name is jane. Jane has decided she will only sit on the potty and go if it is on the trampoline in our backyard. [ laughter ] so needless to say im exhausted. Anyway. I feel like this might be some kind of carlic payback for the man show on the trampoline. Years from now when my daughter is old enough to vote and i will have to explain this election to her, i feel she wont believe it. We are less than 70 days away from deciding who our next president will be. On september 26th donald trump and Hillary Clinton will face off in a debate at hofstra university. This is interesting. The Clinton Campaign is using psychology experts to create a personality profile of trump to figure out what his approach might be. Which i dont know, are they preparing for a debate or trying to catch the Zodiac Killer . [ laughter ] Hillary Clinton said, im not taking anything for granted, i dont know which donald trump will show up. Shes right, it could be the donald trump we see on cable news, could be the donald trump could be donald trump jr. Technically still a donald trump. Hillarys plan is reportedly to try to bait trump into saying something that will get him into trouble. Theyre said to believe hes most insecure about his intelligence, his net worth, and his image as a successful businessman. Which that seems obvious. In fact, i dont think they need to do a personality profile at all. If you want insight into donald trump, hes more than happy to tell you everything you need to know about him. Donald trump is maybe the best interview there is. Putin did call me a genius. The doctor said, man, you have the Blood Pressure of a great great athlete whos 20 years old. Im really rich. I think i am actually humble, i think im much more humble than you would understand. Nobody builds walls bigger than me. Believe me. I write the biggest ovations. Society loves me. I went to an ivy league school. Im very highly educated. I know words. I have the best words. Im one of the smartest people in the world. Its true. He referred to my hands, if theyre small, Something Else must be small. I guarantee you theres no problem. I guarantee you. Evidence [ cheers and applause ] dave seems like he might be too shy to be our president. Unfortunately not everyone is as passionate about donald trump as donald trump himself is. According to a new poll 54 of Republican Voters dont believe trump was the best choice to be their partys nominee for president , they wished theyd picked someone else. Kind of like when you go to buy a shirt. You look around. You see all these shirts, plain patterns, regular shirts. They look okay but not exciting. Then tucked in the middle of all these plain shirts you see this totally awesome shirt. Its bold. Its different. It doesnt play by the other shirts rules. You think about what a killer youd feel like going out with this shirt on. You buy it, you get home, you go in your closet or wherever. You try the shirt on. And you look at yourself in the says what the hell are you wearing . Jimmy and then you realize you look like a tool with a big capital t. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] jimmy but fortunately, the store you bought it from has a great return policy. Oh, wait, no it doesnt. This is the shirt youre stuck with for four years. Thats how the twoparty system works. Would anyone like to buy a shirt very cheap . [ cheers and applause ] thats going to look great on you. Please slip that on because i would love to see that as i do the rest of the show. Yeah, thank you, yeah. There you go, all right. Meanwhile theres a major arrest in west palm beach, florida, yesterday. The ramifications of which are now being felt all around the world. Vladimir putin is in the Palm Beach County jail. Its this man who also apparently shares the same name with the russian leader. At the public store in city place. Police say he kept going into the store to yell at customers. Putin is charged with trespassing. Jimmy maybe thats the putin trump has been talking about all this time. [ laughter ] wow, what are the odds that guy would live in florida with that name, huh . Hey, this is something parents and students should be aware of now that its back to school time. Researchers at the university of nevada found that students are more likely to Pay Attention if their teacher is attractive. This is based on a study conducted by van halen back in 1984. [ laughter ] students will pay more attention to goodlooking teachers. Unless theyre home schooled, then it doesnt really apply. Its interesting and it makes sense. Already some private institutions are adapting to attract more Prospective Students to their schools. Looking to advance your career with a specialized degree . [ narrated in a sexy female voice ] the whispers institute of Technology Features the most attractive professors. Corporate accounting. Occupational therapy. Computer network administration. And much, much more. Need an extra hand . Our private booths give you oneonone access to every inch of our professors knowledge. Whispers institute of technology. Located on route 9 in hoboken across from joann fabrics. Ill be waiting for you. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] jimmy before you, i had him, guillermo. Guillermo yeah, i know. Jimmy abc this morning unveiled the new cast of dancing with the stars. Its season 23 and it is quite a lineup. Monday, september 12th, dancings back. And america, youve never seen a cast of stars like this. Laurie hernandez. Megatron. Baby face. This white lady. Kanyes exgirlfriend. Rick perry. Young richard greico. Didnt we see her already . Vanilla ice. This guy. Marilu henner. And that dumbass swimmer. Dancing with the stars live on abc. Were still doing this. Jimmy yeah, im looking forward to the swimmer. [ cheers and applause ] ryan lochte was the big surprise. This is part of his plea agreement, i guess. To me the big shocker is how did it take 23 seasons to get vanilla ice to do the show . [ laughter ] 2004 . Vanilla ice has a dilemma on his hands. Of course hes going to dance to ice ice baby. You dont want to do this the First Episode, you blow your wad. But if you wait too long, you might get eliminated because youre vanilla ice. But i bet hes going to do well. He can dance. I love this lineup. Between the election and dancing with the stars, the American People are now going to get two chances to not vote for rick perry in one year. [ laughter ] they made that announcement on good morning america. Most people have little to no idea whats really going on in the world. So this afternoon we went on the street, asked people how they thought donald trump did on dancing with the stars last night. Obviously donald trump wasnt on dancing with the stars last night. New season doesnt start until september 12th. Did that prevent people from giving their takes on trumps imaginary performance . Absolutely not. In tonights dancing with the donald edition of lie witness news. What did you think of donald trump dancing the cha cha last night on dancing with the stars . I thought it was really funny. I dont know if hes that great of a dancer. What was wrong about it . He tried. Its all right. He came out for it. He did a good job, i guess. As you know, donald trump made that crazy appearance on dancing with the stars last night. Yeah. Are your friends on twitter and facebook going crazy over it . Yeah, theres a twitter beef about it. Its been pretty chaotic. Stars when Donald Trumps wig fell off . Was that crazy . It was hilarious. You know. It was pretty funny. What was going through your mind when you saw that . He needs to get a new one. What did you think about how emotional scott baio got in the audience when he cried . Did your heart go out to him . Yeah, it did. Describe that moment when he was crying with the one tear. Seeing him emotional, that kind of got me. Its like, oh my goodness. Hes actually really sad about this. How do you think donald trump breaking through the wall at the end speaks to his stance on immigration . Actually, he wanted to build the wall between canada and the states, right . And i think its kind of funny that he ended up doing that, i guess. Mexico. Between mexico and the states. Oh. Right. Right. So what did you think about donald trump dancing with Hillary Clinton at the emmys . Were you surprised by their partnership . Yeah, i was, very surprised. Did she seem she was doing it reluctantly . Yes, very much so. When he spun her hard do you think he was trying to make her id like to give him the benefit of the doubt and say no. But again it could be most likely it was. What did you think of donald trump spinning Hillary Clinton so violently during their tango when she came on . I saw it coming. I could feel the tension of the elections so i wasnt really that surprised, honestly. I felt the energy. I felt it was going to happen. To seeing him drop her during that dip . Oh my god, i was so surprised to see that, i could not believe that. Hopefully shes okay. Hopefully its not, you know hopefully shell heal for the elections. Well see. I hope for the best, you know . Do you want to wish Hillary Clinton a speedy recovery from being dropped by donald trump . Hillary clinton, i hope you recover really quick and i hope bill takes good care of you. Yeah, you know. Go, women. [ cheers and applause ] jimmy were going to take a last week, i saw a clip, a great clip on facebook. Maybe you saw this. A group of singers gathered around a goat making up a song about the goat. Watch this. . . Ooh whose billy goat is this . . Ooh whose billy goat is this . . Ooh whose billy goat is this . . Ooh whose billy goat is this . . Baa baa baa . . Ooh whose billy goat is this . [ cheers and applause ] jimmy so the guys are a band. In fact, theyve been on our show. That was Anthony Hamilton and the hamiltones. When we come back, anthony and music and animals too. So stick around, well be right back [ cheers and applause ] . Man, im glad aflac pays cash. Aflac isnt Major Medical enough . No whos gonna help cover the holes in their plans . Aflac like rising copays and deductibles. Aflac or help pay the mortgage . Or child care . Aflaaac and everyday expenses . Aflac learn about one day pay at aflac. Com boat blurlbrlblrlbr to the sticky. The stinky. Even those who get a little icky. To all the beautiful mess makers, keep it up. With delta in2ition plus h2okinetic, you can. See what delta can do. [ male announcer ] cats will do anything for the irresistible taste of temptations treats. What are you doing . Oh, here, check this out. . . [ meows ] temptations. Cats cant resist. Oh, i want a quarter pounder with cheese. Whether youre a window shopper. A mastermind. Or even a play caller. Nfl season is here and so is mcdonalds newest mcpick 2 line up. Choose between a quarter pounder with cheese. Our newest pick triple cheeseburger. Mix and match or pair up your faves for just five bucks. Oh triple cheeseburger catch your picks for a limited time. Enjoy the choice. . Lemme get a mcpick2 . . Ba da da da da . . . With intuitive allwheel drive. The nissan rogue, murano and pathfinder. Now get 0 apr for 72 months, plus 500 bonus cash. Tmobiles coverage is unstoppable. We doubled our lte coverage. And, with extended range lte, it reaches farther than ever. Now you can stream video and music free in more places without using any of your data. 311 million americans and counting. And we wont stop. Jimmy hi, there. We are back. Welcome back. Zooey deschanel, ben stein, and music from glass animals is on the way. Before the break i showed you a video i saw on facebook of a group of singers performing an impromptu song around a billy goat. The songs been stuck in my head ever since. The video has about 7 million views on facebook. We reached out to Anthony Hamilton and the hamiltones and they came from North Carolina to be with us tonight. Please welcome Anthony Hamilton and the hamiltones. . Jimmy good to see you, how are you doing . How are you . So i guess, first of all, where were you singing . Where were you when the goat was there . What was that . Indianapolis. Jimmy that was just you were in at a festival. Jimmy okay, all right. It was at a goat festival . What kind of festival . State fair. Jimmy state fair, that makes sense. Did you ever find out whose billy goat it was . Still a mystery. We have a fun idea. If we surprised you with a series of animals. You guys have not seen, not heard any of the animals, youve not seen, you dont know what animals youre going to see. We dont know what youve got. Jimmy were going to surprise you with animals. Gather round the animals and sing to them similar to how you did it with the goat. And then i think it will be fun. You want to do it . [ cheers and applause ] theres animal number one. All right. Youve seen these before, right . Yeah. Jimmy thats a goodlooking one. Im not going to say what it is. Ill let you guys figure out how youre going to approach this. . Ooh ooh whose bunny rabbit is this . . Ooh ooh whose bunny rabbit is this . [ cheers and applause ] . Tell me ooh ooh whose b whats happening . . Ooh whose bunny rabbit is this . Jimmy well done. Beautiful. [ cheers and applause ] did you like it . All right. Step over here. Weve got another animal for you. Equally adorable. Maybe even more adorable. Ill let you guys figure out what that is. Chicky bird. Jimmy all right. [ cheers and applause ] . Ooh ooh whose chicky bird is this . . Ooh whose chicky bird is this . Oh wow making a run for it jimmy oh, no. Now were in a lot of trouble. Look at this. Well, wow. This ones wearing a hat. Hm. Jimmy thats like one of woodys hats from toy story. Whose hat is that . Jimmy do you want to think about it for a second . Iguana . . Little lizard . A sunny dragon . . A little lizard funny little lizard . . A little lizard funny little lizard . . Whose lizard funny little . Little lizard funny little lizard . Jimmy wow, well done. [ cheers and applause ] all right, all right. Weve got two more. You ever seen one of these . Thats strange. Please dont jump. I promise i will pass out. Smooth pass out. Jimmy this one just got back from the o hes running laps. Yeah, yeah. I believe it is. Jimmy what that is one . . Ooh ooh whose armadillo is this . . Ooh ooh whose armadillo is this . Come on baby . Ooh ooh whose armadillo is this . Ooh whose armadillo is this . [ cheers and applause ] jimmy very well done. Thats crazylooking. We have one more. One more animal. Its been going great so far. And finally ohoh. Jimmy look how cute that little guy is. You see what we have there . Pokemon. Sticky back. Jimmy what that is . A sticky back . Sticky back. Jimmy all right. . Ooh ooh whose sticky back is this . . Ooh ooh whose sticky back is this . . Ooh ooh whose sticky back is this . Jimmy wow, how about that. . Ooh ooh whose sticky back is this . Jimmy thats Anthony Hamilton and the hamiltones. Their latest album is called what up billy . Thanks for coming out and doing that, guys. The animals thank you as well. Tonight on the show we have music from glass animals, ben stein is here, well be right back with Zooey Deschanel so stick around [ cheers and applause ] . In a world that needs a hero, say hello to a powerful tool that gives you options to fit your budget. . Oh, im tied to this chair . Dundundaaaa i dont know that an insurancethemed comic book is what were looking for. Did i mention he can save people nearly 600 . You havent even heard my catchphrase. Im all done with this guy. Box him up. Thats terrible. Poor mouth breather. Allergies . Stuffy nose . Cant sleep . Take that. Strip instantly opens your nose up to 38 more than allergy medicine alone. Shut your mouth and say goodnight, mouthbreathers. Breathe right. Well she loves to say, well, fantastic a lot. I do say that, you see. I study psychobiology. Im a fine arts major. Nobody really believes that i take notes this way, but they actually make sense to me. I try to balance my studying with the typical college experience. This windows pc is a life saver being able to pull up different articles the average age of a homeless person is 9 years old. My dream is to help kids living on the streets with education. Charles whats up man . Whoa how can we help . Ah man wait, is that a basketball player . Yes wow my hearts about to jump out my chest man. Charles you ought to be proud man. Im just extremely grateful they were here giving them some encouragement thats something that these kids are going to remember for a lifetime. Did you see his big old feet . Look. Jimmy hi, welcome back. Tonight on the show my former cohost from comedy central, one of the worlds most fascinating men, ben stein is with us. Then later, they came all the way from oxford, england, their new album is called how to be a human being, glass animals from the samsung outdoor stage. A lot of excitement about glass animals. Will be here, cat deeley will join us, and well have music from Nathaniel Rateliff and the night sweats. And thursday, winona ryder, casey wilson, and music from yg. So please join us for both those shows. Since she was here last, our first guest got married and gave birth to a baby girl. The season premiere of her show new girl, which she directed, arrives september 20th on fox. Please say hello to Zooey Deschanel. [ cheers and applause ] . Jimmy how are you . Good. Are these new chairs . [ cheers and applause ] jimmy no. Are they uncomfortable . This is a very warm welcome. Jimmy yeah, yeah. Well, you know. Theyre excited. Are these new chairs . Jimmy no, i think theyre the same chairs. Really . It feels very thronelike. Jimmy do they feel uncomfortable . No, i just feel like touch the ground. Jimmy we like to humiliate our guests. Thats part the thing. That is weird. Your legs almost dont touch the ground. Oh, cute shoes. Oh, thanks. Jimmy you by the way does your daughter like your shoes . Little girls love sparkly shoes . She hasnt seen them. I borrowed them. If she had, she would try to steal them. Jimmy she would. Shes a little over 1 year old . Yeah. Jimmy enjoying her . Shes the best. Shes so much fun. My husband taught her how to sa cheese. Just because she likes cheese. And this morning i went in and its still dark in her room. Shes wearing her little jammies and her sleep sack. And she goes, more. Cheese, cheese. Im like, you didnt even have cheese and you want more . Were beginning this already . Jimmy is that one of her first words, cheese . Yeah. Jimmy really . Wow. She said bubble. She said bubba. Mama, dada, yeah. Jimmy mama, dada, cheese thats all you need to know. Yes. Nana too. Jimmy she does . Like when shes ready to go. Night night. Jimmy do you want to bring home a baby animal for her . We have a whole bunch of them backstage. Yes, but i dont want to take home an armadillo. Jimmy why not . Because they can spread leprosy. Jimmy they can, what . You didnt touch one . Jimmy i licked one. What are you talking about . [ laughter ] they are the only creature other than humans that carry the leprosy virus. So dont hug it. Jimmy its weird. We did get that one from a leper colony. [ laughter ] i didnt know that about armadillos. I was like, oh nobody touch that thing. Jimmy yeah we probably im sure its fine. Jimmy did you have a big Birthday Party, a 1st Birthday Party for your daughter . Not really. I did make her a little cake. Jimmy okay. I made her a little heartshaped cake that didnt have sugar. It. Jimmy oh, no. Really . Shes so little. Jimmy yeah. Theres a lot of sugar in cake. Then i whipped up some Coconut Cream and put it on top. Looked like a cupcake. And i kept seeing like on the internet like smash cake, smash cake, make a smash cake for your 1yearold. Im like, im making this cake just so she can smash it. So were like, all right heres your cake happy birthday and she goes like not at all interested. Jimmy oh, really. No smashing. Like once i like cut up a little she had a little bit of it but she was not jimmy theyre smart, they know theyre being cheated. Give her a cheese cake or something. Jimmy are you planning to never give her sugar . Shell have sugar eventually. I just kind of want to put it off. It makes them crazy. She had a baked apple the other like shes really jimmy are you a strict parent . Do you have a lot of rules that you follow . Shes so little. I dont. But i keep a close eye on her. Jimmy were your parents strict parents . Well, they had a lot of rules. Jimmy what were your parents main rules . Im sure they had more than a couple. They restricted our television. Jimmy oh, yeah. And we had we didnt have cable, which most people had cable. Jimmy we didnt have it either. We didnt have cable, and so we only could there were like five channels. And my mom would always find me watching cooking shows on pbs. Because jimmy is that where you learned to make that crappy cake for your daughter . Exactly, thats where i learned to make the crappy cake yeah. For some reason i loved watching cooking shows. I like watching people cook. Jimmy its funny, your parents were restricting you our children away from. My parents are like, what is this julia child turn this off jimmy melt your brain my baby takes the phone and like she steals my phone. Jimmy she likes it, yeah, ours does too. I dont want her to be doing that but shell like take the phone and its hilarious. Jimmy right, yeah. She sees im interested in it so she wants it. Jimmy exactly. It glows and it looks like a toy. And you can hand them a piece of toast and theyll talk into it, it doesnt matter. But when its that special little thing she knows when you have a phone you go, hello . Shell be like, heyoo . Jimmy kids know a lot of stuff that we cant really explain. I know. Jimmy mine calls gambling websites, is that normal . [ laughter ] i think so are its natural. Jimmy well talk about new girl. You directed an episode, the First Episode of the season. Zooey deschanel is with us. [ cheers and applause ] with my moderate to severe crohns disease,. I was always searching for ways to manage my symptoms. I thought i had it covered. Then i realized managing was all i was doing. When i finally told my doctor, he said humira was for people like me who have tried other medications,. But still experience the symptoms of moderate to severe crohns disease. In clinical studies, the majority of patients on humira saw significant symptom relief. And many achieved remission. 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Maybe morocco or something. Jimmy hold on, lets call him. Lets just call him, yeah. And so he was gone. But hes written into the episode. So we had to shoot all the stuff around h jimmy do you think he did this to sabotage you . Probably. Jimmy because maybe hes thinking of directing an episode . Right, he already did direct one last year. Jimmy he is sabotaging you, absolutely. The whole thing was probably. Jimmy did you disappear to shoot a movie with tom cruise while he was doing that . No, but i was on maternity leave. Jimmy okay, yeah, you did that. Revenge what is this was. Thats what it is. Jimmy its a dish best served cold. tis true, tis true. To be a crossover of your show, new girl, and brooklyn 99. Yeah. Jimmy i love that, i wish they did that more. When i was a kid, when fonzie and ritchie would show up on laverne and shirley. Such an 80s thing to do. Jimmy it is an 80s thing to do. Awesome. I know, yeah. I shot my part of the brooklyn 99 episode, then were going to shoot our part of it next week. Jimmy so it will be they will be on your show . Andy will be on yours, you will be on his . Exactly. Jimmy its a double crossover . A double crossover, yeah. We have basically the cast of new girl goes to new york, because schmitts getting an award from his high school. Jimmy i see. And thats how we end up in jimmy jail . I didnt end up in jail. Jimmy okay, all right. We end up in the midst of jimmy i love that. I applaud you for bringing back that conceit. I havent seen that in quite a while. It was all my idea. [ cheers and applause ] jimmy the closest we get to fox is like, youre doing a crossover, okay. Jimmy somebody from the bachelor winds up in bachelor on paradise. Its like, oh, look, they came back. Yeah. We dont have anything good like that. Its very good to see you. Good to see you. Jimmy congratulations on the baby. [ cheers and applause ] congratulations on the show. New girl, season premiere september 20th on fox. Zooey deschanel. Be right back with ben stein [ cheers and applause ] . When it comes to healthcare, seconds can mean the difference for partners in health, time is life. We have 18,000 people around the world. The microsoft cloud helps our entire staff stay connected and Work Together in real time to help those that need it. The ability to collaborate changes how we work. What we do together we asked real people to use cottonelle. On their bums. Why do you think the ripples make a difference . It gets it all clean. They give me a very happy feeling bum. Cleanripple texture is designed to clean better. Go cottonelle, go commando. To those caked in flour. Coated in dust. To all the beautiful mess makers. Keep it up. With delta touch2o technology, you can. Its a golden opportunity. [engine revving] it just finds more streetlegal form. 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Still to come, music from glass animals. Our next guest is an autho lawyer, economist, political pundit, game show host, teacher and buellerer who graciously allowed me to appear on tv with him back in 1997. Please say hello to ben stein [ cheers and applause ] . Jimmy how are you doing . Jimmy its an honor to have you here. An honor to be here. Jimmy i know you watch the show regularly. Very. I email you all night long sending you notes about it. Jimmy im always up. Thats the amazing thing, like a vampire, you never sleep. Jimmy we met i cant believe we met almost 20 years ago. Yes. Jimmy unbelievable. At a rehearsal in burbank. Jimmy thats right. They brought you in to be the first person to be the cohost and we said, dont bother bringing in anyone else. Jimmy that is true, that worked out like that. It was just i jimmy you and i fell in love almost immediately. It was amazing. You were so fing funny from the getgo, it was a joke. Nobody else could even remotely jimmy well, we didnt bother to see if anyone else could, which was fortunate for me. Yes. When your cousin came on. Jimmy cousin sal. He was wonderful. Jimmy probably the funniest person i know. He is a genius. Jimmy for those who have not seen the show, guillermo, have money, the show we did together . Guillermo no, no. Jimmy never saw it . Offensive in a way. Its why donald trump wants to throw you over the wall. I prepared a clip to give you a stroll down memory lane. Good, good, good. Jimmy, what are my shoes doing there . Your shoes are here because were playing strip ben stein of clothes and this is all that you managed to get off him. I was thinking that if bob should beat you, perhaps youd drop your pants. No, i wont. [ cheers and applause ] and bob. That jimmy. [ cheers and applause ] jimmy a lot of class. Theres so much sexual tension between us. Why didnt we ever consummate that . Well, those are the days when there was a lot of discrimination in that world. Jimmy oh, yeah, youre right. [ laughter ] jimmy i saw you in the wall street journal. A week, week and a half ago. They did a story on people who own a lot of homes. Yes. Jimmy you were featured. How many homes do you own . 13 and a lot in malibu. Jimmy 13 and a lot . An ocean view lot. Jimmy in three different cities . In sandpoint, idaho. Washington, d. C. Beverly hills, california. West hollywood. And rancho mirage. Jimmy you dont rent any of them out . No. Jimmy why do you have so many houses . I inherited one two at the watergate. Inherited one from my parents, bought my sister out. Somebody showed me a nice one there and i bought that for arts sake. [ laughter ] we live in the summer in sandpoint, idaho, the most beautiful town in the world. And i was afraid i might have noisy neighbors so i bought all the ones around mine. [ laughter ] we bought in Beverly Hills because my wife always wanted to live in Beverly Hills. We bought in malibu because i love malibu. We bought the lot across the house there, trap our dogs and eat them. Jimmy i see. We bought in West Hollywood to use as an office and a neighbor made noise so i bought his apartment. [ laughter ] jimmy this is one of your houses. First of all its beautiful. God bless you. Jimmy why do you have a tv from 1995 . With all these houses, ben. I dont know how to use the new ones. Jimmy uhhuh. Its funny. Because i had a guest over. She said, i love all your retro stuff. Where do you get all this retro stuff . And i said, thats what i bought and never replaced. By the way, i dont know how to use that one very well. Jimmy youll figure it out. I dont think it even gets the right signal anymore. Probably doesnt. Jimmy people dont know you were a speechwriter for president nixon. Right. Jimmy what year was that . I was a speechwriter for nixon 73, 74. My big event at the Nixon White House was 70. When my father was chairman of the council of economic advisers and had me over for lunch. My father whispered to me, would saw him . And i said, of course. He said, hes sitting right behind you. This was at the white house highlevel white house appointees. I said, youve got to be kidding. He said, turn around. I turned around and there was Elvis Presley having lunch with bob haldeman, chief of staff. Jimmy the famous incident where elvis showed up at the white house unannounced . Yes. And i got up and i said, mr. Presley, everyone in the world is your fan but im your biggest fan. And he said, thankuh very much. [ cheers and applause ] jimmy thats how you do it. That was actually, very famous photograph came out of that day. I dont know if people have seen that. [ cheers and applause ] jimmy the president , elvis and ben. The three amigos as you were called back then. What do you think of donald trump . Youre a lifelong republican. This obviously weve seen some things weve never seen before during this election process. Its been hell. Jimmy are you excited about its hell. Its just unbelievable. Because im not a fan of trump at all. I think hes theres something wrong with him. Jimmy okay. [ cheers and applause ] i went to law school with mrs. Clinton and i wear the Yale Law School tie to show jimmy did you know her in law school . Just to say hello in the hall. In the merest possible way. Jimmy did you ever try to woo her . Oh, god, are you kidding . No, i was then and still am married to the most beautiful woman in the world [ cheers and applause ] jimmy you were married in law school, i didnt realize that, wow. To the worlds most wonderful human. She was just a quiet little firstyear. I was a big student radical working with the black panthers. That is true. I know people think thats a joke but its true. What were you doing with them, doing their taxes . What were you doing . [ laughter ] i cant even do my own taxes. We were raising funds for what was supposed to be their Free Breakfast Program for poor children in a neighborhood but it turned out they were actually using the money to buy guns. [ laughter ] it was the scariest mistake. Jimmy as long as it was a practical thing. No, but im not i should say i am not a fan of mrs. Clinton at all and it breaks my heart that the two nominees are who they are. I like Lindsey Graham from south carolina. Jimmy but hes out. I know. He hardly got any votes at all. Jimmy if donald trump asks you to be in his cabinet will you consider it, if he wins . No. Jimmy you will not. In the morning for one thing. Jimmy all right. Ive been in many, many cabinet meetings and theyre incredibly boring. Jimmy okay. Incredibly boring, not entertaining at all. Much, much, much more fun to be home playing with my dogs. Jimmy all right. Its very, very good to see you as always. God bless you. [ cheers and applause ] jimmy you know i love you. Ben stein, everybody. Be right back with glass animals [ cheers and applause ] . Dicky the Jimmy Kimmel Live because every great accomplishment takes courage. Because one person cant do it all. Midfirst bank will always be true to your money with Proven Services that support all of your endeavors. Midfirst bank. True to your money. Im Hillary Clinton and i approve this message. Donald trump i could stand in the middle of 5th avenue and shoot somebody and i wouldnt lose any voters, okay . And you can tell them to go f themselves blood coming out of her eyes, blood coming out of her wherever. You gotta see this guy. Ahh, i dont know what i said, ahh. I dont remember. Hes going like i dont remember . Dicky the Jimmy Kimmel LiveConcert Series is presented by samsung. Jimmy id like to thank Zooey Deschanel, ben stein, Anthony Hamilton and apologize nightline is next but first their album is called how to be a human being, here with the song life itself, glass animals . . . . . . Daddy was dumb said that id be Something Special brought me up tough . . But i was a gentle human said that he loved each of my two million freckles when i grew up was . . Gonna be a super star i cant get a job so i live with my mom i take her money . . But not quite enough i sit in the car and i listen to static she said i l . But i look fantastic cut back down to my knees gotta get back gotta get free . . Cut back down to my knees lean back now lean back and breathe cut back down to my knees . . Gotta get back gotta get free cut back down to my knees lean back now . . Lean back and breathe . . . Im waking up lost in boxes outside tesco look like a bum sipping codeine coca cola . . Thought that i was northern camdens own flash gordon sonic ray gun . . Gonna be a super star i cant get a job so i live with my mom i take her money but . . Not quite enough i make my own fun in grandmamas basement said i look mad . . She said i look wasted cut back down to my knees gotta get back gotta get free . . Cut back down to my knees lean back now lean back and breathe cut back down to my . . Knees gotta get back gotta get free cut back down to my knees lean back now . . Lean back and breathe . . . . . . . . . . . . Cut back down to my knees gotta get back gotta get free cut back down to my knees . . Lean back now lean back and breathe cut back down to my . Gotta get free cut back down to my knees lean back now lean back and breathe . . Cut back down to my knees gotta get back gotta get free cut back down to my knees . . Lean back now lean back and breathe . . . . This is a special edition of nightline. Tonight, diane sawyer takes us into a hidden america. Deep inside the most notorious jail complex in the country. A dangerous purgatory for the officers and the inmates. If you can survive Rikers Island you can survive a place known for its brutality. Those videos from the past. Is it possible to change this infamous place . And the one man with the plan to change it all. Inside Rikers Island is