Musical guest, john mayer, and featuring the legendary roots crew. Questlove 585 Rochester Steve and now, here he is, jimmy fallon [ cheers and applause ] hello. Hey welcome, everybody. Welcome. Welcome, welcome, welcome, welcome, welcome to the tonight show. This is it. Youre here. [ cheers and applause ] you made the show. Youre here. Thank you very much. Heres what people are talking about. You guys, the finalists for times person of the year just came out. And they include donald trump, hillary clinton, mark zuckerberg, vladimir putin, and beyonce. [ light laughter ] putin was like, most of group is weak, but even i cannot compete with queen b. No, i mean, lets be come on. [ cheers and applause ] speaking of beyonce, both she and adele got a bunch of grammy nominations today. They were each nominated for record of the year, song of the year, and album of the year. [ cheers and applause ] marking marking the first time in 2016, that america has two finalists that they actually like. [ laughter and applause ] yeah, thats very interesting. This is kind of interesting. Yesterday, joe biden said hes not completely ruling out running for president in 2020. Even said, what the hell. [ laughter ] when asked what his Campaign Slogan would be, he said, i just told you. What the hell. [ laughter and applause ] what the hell. Meanwhile, the white house Just Announced a new program to teach Computer Science to more american schoolchildren. Yeah, they say if it goes well, one day america will be able to hack its own election. [ laughter and applause ] isnt that nice . Thats so thoughtful. Steve yeah, progress. Jimmy isnt that nice . Steve progress. [ applause ] listen to this. I read at that as president , donald trump will have access to an Emergency Alert system which will allow him to send a a text to every american at once. [ laughter ] but its only for emergencies, like natural disasters, security issues, or if saturday night live does another sketch about him. But thats it. [ laughter and applause ] only emergencies. Actually, Vice President dick cheney said that donald trump needs to be more careful about what he tweets. Cheney said, if youre not careful, you could end up shooting yourself in the face or foot. Foot. [ laughter ] shooting your friend in the shooting your friends foot. Shooting yourself in the foot. Sorry, whatd i say . Jimmy im going to leave now. I just heard that last night, Vice President elect mike pence attended the new york jets game at met life stadium, where the jets lost 4110. Pence heard so much booing, he thought he was seeing hamilton again. [ laughter and applause ] to celebrate the standing rock, sioux tribes victory against the Dakota Access pipeline, josh brolin posted a nude photo of himself standing on top of a a rock. [ light laughter ] in response, the sioux tribe said, were opposed to that pipeline too. So would you just [ laughter and applause ] steve ho hey jimmy this is kind of crazy. I saw a that a private Company Called moon express says it wants to start offering trips to the moon for under 10,000 a ticket. Most people were like, yeah, im not sure i want to book the cheapest option for my trip to outer space. [ applause ] that company cheaper . [ light laughter ] if im gonna go to space [ light laughter ] check this out, you guys. Amazon launched its new go app. Did you hear about this thing . Its pretty cool. It lets you shop in the supermarket without having to check out at the register. Theres no register. Yeah, they say its just like shopping on their website, until you get arrested for being drunk and in your underwear. [ laughter ] [ applause ] i need this. Next day, next day. [ light laughter ] [ unintelligible ] thats right, amazons new app lets you shop in a store without going through the checkout line, and the ad is going viral today. Heres just the first part of it. Right here, check it out. What would shopping look like if you could walk into a a store, grab what you want, and just go . Use the amazon go app, to enter. Then put away your phone, and start shopping. Jimmy yeah. Pretty cool. But i i think theres another reason people might want to try out this new app. Heres another version. Ever wanted that guilty pleasure of picking something up, and just walking out of the store . Go ahead, take stuff off our shelves and hide it in your jacket, then just walk out like a common criminal. Amazon shoplift. [ laughter and applause ] with all of the shoplifting, with none of the guilt. [ applause ] jimmy its shoplifting. If you guys have pets, you should listen to this. Veterinarians are warning people to be careful with alcohol that they spill on the floor, because theres been an increase in drunk pets. [ light laughter ] and youll know your dog is drunk when he starts confronting the vacuum cleaner. [ laughter and applause ] hes like, come at me, bro. Im not afraid of you anymore [ applause ] and finally, for the first time ever, the ken doll is getting a a designer makeover. He has new hair and a moschino suit. Take a look. [ laughter ] in a related story, barbie just changed her relationship status to its complicated. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] we have a great show tonight. Give it up for the roots [ cheers and applause ] [ cheers and applause ] oh, great crowd tonight. Great show. We have a big week of shows ahead. Tomorrow night, Academy Award nominated actor Edward Norton will be here. [ cheers and applause ] then later this week, Robert De Niro will be here. [ cheers and applause ] Pharrell Williams will be here. Dwayne johnson will be joining us. Its going to be good. But first, we have a fantastic show tonight. He stars opposite Jennifer Lawrence in the new movie, passengers, chris pratt is here. [ cheers and applause ] i love that guy. Steve hes a good dude. Jimmy later in the show, chris and i are doing something fun called mad lib theater. Be sure to stick around for that. [ cheers ] plus, shes a terrific actress. Shes fantastic every time she comes on the show. She stars in and directed her first movie. Its called all we had, the wonderful katie holmes is on the show. [ cheers and applause ] the director. Did the whole thing. And we got great music. Did you hear rehearsal today . Tariq i didnt hear it. Jimmy oh, its fantastic. Hes got a good band with him too like tariq pinos here, everybodys here. Jimmy Steve Jordans here. Tariq yeah. [ talking over each other ] jimmy pino palladino. [ cheers ] on bass, James Valentine from maroon 5 is here. Hes going to play with them. [ applause ] and this guys so good, he doesnt even need anybody. He doesnt need anybody. Hes that so thats amazing, what a show youre going to see tonight. The one and only john mayer is here tonight. [ cheers and applause ] love on the weekend. Thats my man. Hey guys, it is time for screen grabs. Here we go. [ cheers and applause ] jimmy now, these are these are some weird, funny things that you guys have found on the internet, or other places and then sent in to us. This first screen grab was sent in by heather eilert in wichita, kansas. She was looking for photographers online to take some family photos, and saw this. Happy family except for the boot to the head. [ laughter ] why would you put that if you were a photographer . Steve i dont care man, good action shots. [ light laughter ] right in the face. Jimmy that was good i think thats a good smack to the face. Yeah. This next screen grab was sent in by rhiannon seneli in davenport, iowa. She was shopping for some christmas ornaments online, and found this. Personalized state shaped ornaments available in all 20 states. [ laughter and applause ] quick, how many states are there . I dont know, 20 . All right, yeah. Steve denial. Jimmy that is close enough. Steve good enough. Jimmy this next one was sent in by kimberly porch in irving, texas. She was searching online to find a good doctor. Lets see who she found. Meet the most progressive tool in health care. [ laughter and applause ] come on, man. Steve come on. [ applause ] jimmy i cant give me a a break. Steve thats not a tool. Jimmy the good news is, youre on the front of the website. Steve yeah, right. And youre progressive. Jimmy okay, and youre progressive. But we asked and they called you a tool. [ light laughter ] this next one was sent in by Krysten Miller in punta gorda, florida. She got an alert on her phone. Steve oh, my gosh. Jimmy yeah, it says, you currently have no friends. [ laughter and applause ] steve why . Why . Do you mean she knows that. Jimmy i know. I think the worst part is that shes forced to click ok. [ laughter ] steve yeah. [ talking over each other ] jimmy im okay with it. Im a im okay with it. Steve youre good with it . Jimmy yeah, i i have to be. Steve you have no friends. Jimmy youve got no friends and a horrible attitude. [ laughter ] this next screen grab was sent in by greg hummel in rochester hills, michigan. He was trying to find a wifi network to log on to, and he found this grandma click this for internet. [ laughter ] grandma click this. Someones trying to help out their grandma. Steve that is genius. Jimmy but that seems confusing to me even. Im like, if im grandma, im like, do i want 5g . Steve which one do i want . Jimmy whats the difference . This is next screen grab is from chris martinez. He lives right here in new york city. He was watching the local news. They were showing some of the new balloons in the macys thanksgiving day parade. Steve oh. Jimmy yeah, and they caught them in a private moment here, i think. [ laughter ] dogs dogs will be dogs. Steve dogs, come on man. Jimmy dogs will be dogs. They got they all do it. They all do it. Steve scotty and felix. [ applause ] jimmy were down to our were down to our last one here, its from david delangelo in toronto, canada. He was shopping for a new guitar, and he spotted a guy in an ad that he says looks like me. I dont know if i see it. Take a look at this. [ laughter ] jimmy that doesnt look like me at all. Steve little bit. Jimmy whats wrong that looks nothing like me. Why . Steve face structure. The grin, the eyes, the hair. Jimmy i dont know. Lets see what we can do. I dont believe i look like that guy [ cheers and applause ] [ light laughter ] [ unintelligible ] steve okay, youre in. Good, good. Final [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] get that vein out. Get that forehead vein. There you go. [ cheers and applause ] jimmy trying to get that forehead vein in there. Steve look like about to have an aneurysm. Jimmy thats all the time we have for screen grabs. [ cheers and applause ] if you have a funny screen grab, email it to us at screengrabs tonightshow. Com. We might put it on the show. Stick around. Be right back with chris pratt, everybody. [ cheers and applause ] remember 2007 . Smartphones . O m g ten years later, nothings really changed. Its time to snap out of it. Hello moto. Snap on a jbl speaker. Put a 70 screen on a wall. Get a 10x optical zoom. Get excited world. Hello moto. Moto is here. The new moto z with motomods. Save up to 400 when you trade in your old phone and switch to verizon. Look at these old navy pajamas. You are all welcome. Homemade hors doeuvres . Uh nobody cares. As i was saying, before my sister rudely interrupted, i dont know why im so disgustingly generous. By giving you guys luxurious pajamas from old navy. Awe thank you. I dont want to make you feel bad but i was like. You told me that the entire store was up to 60 off at old navy. Shut your mouth. Those pants were seven bucks. New game truth or dare should i crawl around like a cat . Meow. Meow. Lift up your head and keep moving or let the paranoia haunt you . Everybody lack confidence, everybody lack confidence i keep my feefifofum i keep my heart undone the strong in me, i still smile. [ cheers and applause ] jimmy our first guest is a a talented actor who stars alongside Jennifer Lawrence in the new movie, passengers, which opens in theaters and 3d on december 21st. Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome chris pratt [ cheers and applause ] thank you, roots jimmy aw, hes a stud. How are you, buddy . Great to see you. Oh, man. Im so happy to be here. Jimmy im so happy that you are here. Every time youre here, were always do spmething fun. Thats true. Jimmy yeah. Last time we were here, we did nonsense karaoke yes jimmy where we just made up words and just randomly just sang it. It was really fun. Jimmy i liked it, yeah. Yeah. Jimmy are you a karaoke guy . Did i ask you that last time . I dont know if you did, but i am a karaoke guy. Who doesnt do you guys like karaoke . [ cheers and applause ] yeah. Ive sang karaoke for a long time. My whole family, we always sing karaoke at parties, and jimmy do you have a goto song . Well, yeah, i did. [ light laughter ] i had a i had a goto song that, for a while, i felt like i murdered man in the mirror. [ cheers ] Jimmy Michael jack Michael Jackson. Jimmy its a classic. I know, and then i realized i have to tell you this story. The time i realized that i dont murder Michael Jackson singing karaoke, i went to i had killed it one week. I felt really good. I was like, im thats my song. [ light laughter ] jimmy im the next Michael Jackson. I can sing man in the mirror. Jimmy its a tricky song. Its very difficult. [ light laughter ] high degree of difficulty, but when you nail it, you nail it. Jimmy yeah, yeah, yeah. I was riding high on the wave of nailing man in the mirror the week before jimmy yeah. Went to the new karaoke bar, met a girl. Jimmy ooh, yeah. Her name was marina. Do you remember marina . I was flirting with her. I had man in the mirror in my pocket. I knew i was going to kill it. [ light laughter ] i put man in the mirror in. I got up on stage. I said [ light laughter ] this is true, by the way. I know im playing it up, but this was a really vulnerable moment for me. [ laughter ] jimmy thank you for telling me this. I said, this songs for marina. I swear to god. [ laughter ] and then the first note came out, and when i i didnt realize theres different notes and different keys and stuff, and it just wasnt my key. It wasnt my night, and it came out. It was like im going to make a change oh. [ laughter ] jimmy next thing you knew, you couldnt do it. It didnt match, you know . Jimmy yeah, yeah, yeah, no yeah. The sound didnt line up. Jimmy oh, no. And i was like for once in my you suck [ laughter ] and i just immediately started sweating. Some guy yelled, you suck jimmy you suck . And i look, and he was standing right next to marina. [ audience aws ] and she left with the you suck guy. [ laughter ] [ applause ] ive never sang man in the mirror since, man. It hurts. Jimmy she left with the you suck guy. Yeah, well, no. How is the family . How old is your son . Hes he turned 4. Hes now almost 4 1 2. Jimmy wow. Yeah. Jimmy hes so great. Hes great, man. Jimmy isnt it cool . It is cool. Jimmy i mean, i have three and a two, but its just every day is a new fun thing. Do they know that youre in movies . Does he understand that yet that youre he does, but he doesnt, you know . Its not the other day, he went to universal studios, you know. We were both in Jurassic World. Jimmy wow. [ laughter ] yes, and he jimmy number one movie of all time. And he went to jura he went, and they have a guy there dressed up like my character from Jurassic World. And he does the thing with the raptors, and they have, like, these fake dinosaurs that come out. And this guy pretends to be that character and amuses the people who come to universal studios. And he came home, and hes like, dad, i met the real Jurassic World guy. [ laughter ] im like, that guy . Jimmy no. No, im the jimmy im real the guy. Im the guy. Jimmy im the guy. [ laughter ] he was like, no, no, no, no. He doesnt do it on tv. [ laughter ] hes the real guy. Jimmy the real guy. [ laughter ] i think its the character your guy is based on. He was like jimmy he met the real one, man. He met the real Jurassic Park guy, so he was pretty thrilled. And same yeah, same at legoland. Hes like, dad, emmetts here, the real emmett, not you, the real one. [ laughter ] im like, come on, man jimmy come on. Come on. Give dad something. Youre just mean. Yeah. I think he knows. I think hes just being mean. [ laughter ] jimmy hes just playing with you, yeah. Hes mad at me. Jimmy congrats on passengers. Thank you. Jimmy the idea this is [ cheers and applause ] fantastic idea. Jennifer lawrence. Yeah. Jimmy so, basically, its almost like a cruise ship of the future. Yeah. Jimmy like, a a space giant, giant, giant 5,000 passengers are going to start a new civilization on this new planet. Yeah. Jimmy called horizon ii or something . Yeah, homestead ii. Jimmy homestead ii, yeah. Mmhmm. Jimmy horizon 2 is a good name too. Yeah. [ laughter ] sequel. Jimmy sequel [ laughter ] okay, i can be in that one too. Just letting you know, im available, almost too available. [ laughter ] but i love the idea of this because this could be i think this could be the future. This is it. Yeah, its pretty interesting. Essentially, the idea is that all 5,000 people are put into a a state of hibernation. They, like, suspend all metabolic function, and they can, you know, essentially freeze you. Jimmy in this pod. Without damaging you, and you can stay asleep for hundreds of years and never age. Jimmy what it does, it takes, it takes a hundred and 120 years to make the journey to the new planet. Jimmy to get to homestead ii. Yeah, you sign up for this thing, you fall asleep, you wake up, and youve got four months to go. And youre going to party on this cruise line and start a a new life on a new world. Jimmy yeah, but the bummer is the bummer is jimmy you guys wake up we wake up 90 years early. [ audience ohs ] jimmy theres a malfunction on the thing, and you go yeah, theres a malfunction, and we wake up, and weve got 90 years to go. Jimmy and you have no crew members. You no one to help you, no one to talk to. Yeah. Jimmy youre the only people on this giant, enormous thing, floating in the middle of space. Right. And the ship is we realize that, like, theres as were unraveling the mystery behind what woke us up. And we start to fall for one another. Theres were interrupted by, like, the inevitable collapse of this giant ship as things start going haywire. And theres this ominous, you know, feeling to this ship. And we start to understand theres a reason why we woke up, and we have to, you know, save ourselves and the 5,000 sleeping passengers. Jimmy i want to show a a clip. Heres chris pratt and Jennifer Lawrence in passengers. Take a look at this. Whoo. Somethings wrong. Something big. [ gasps ] im going back to engineering. Can you fix this . I need your help. Let go. All passengers please return to your cabin. Jimmy yeah. [ cheers and applause ] thats what im talking about. More with chris pratt after the break. Stick around, everybody. Its going to be a fun bit. [ cheers and applause ] your Insurance Company wont replace the full value of your totaled new car. The guy says, you picked the wrong insurance plan. No, i picked the wrong Insurance Company. With new car replacement™, well replace the full value of your car plus depreciation. Liberty mutual insurance. Zero really can be a hero. Ds get zero down, zero deposit, zero due at signing, and zero first months payment on select volkswagen models. Right now at the volkswagen sign then drive event. I got it, dad. Ow we love to keep them safe. So we made the nest protect oke and Carbon Monoxide alarm. It speaks up and can alert your phone if theres a problem. Or let you know if everything is just fine. Because, ya know, we worry. [ cheers and applause ] jimmy welcome back, everybody im hanging out with chris pratt [ cheers and applause ] his new movie, passengers, is in theaters and 3d december 21st. Chris, i want to try something fun with you. I thought we could act out a a dramatic scene together. Yeah. Jimmy like weve done before in our films. Yeah, yeah. Jimmy long, storied history. But first, we have to fill in the blanks. It is time for mad lib theater. Here we go. [ cheers and applause ] jimmy heres how this works. Im going to ask you for some silly words, nouns, verbs, adjectives, etcetera. And after we do that, theyre going to be written on to cue cards and then were going to act out a dramatic mad libs scene. Are you ready for this . Yes, sir. Jimmy okay. Type of dessert. Ding dongs. [ light laughter ] jimmy ding dong. Plural . Yeah, ding dongs, like, you know . Jimmy yeah, ding dongs, i know. Yeah, i love them. Silly word. Doinker. [ laughter ] jimmy another word for father. Doinker . [ laughter ] papa. Jimmy give me a year. 200 a. D. [ laughter ] jimmy celebrity name. Jennifer lawrence. [ cheers and applause ] jimmy type of plant. Apple tree. [ laughter ] its a plant. Jimmy yeah, sure. You plant it, yeah. [ talking over each other ] jimmy absolutely. Thats all right. Adjective. Demure. [ light laughter ] jimmy demure. Something youd name a pet. Pickles. [ laughter ] jimmy name of a band. The roots [ cheers and applause ] jimmy plural animal. [ light laughter ] gerbils. [ laughter ] jimmy verb ending in ing. Spanking. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] jimmy give me a number. 22. Jimmy measurement of time. Century. Jimmy centuries. [ light laughter ] centuries. Jimmy centuries. A body part. [ laughter ] the nad. [ laughter and applause ] jimmy the nad. A type of beer. Milwaukees best ice. [ laughter ] the good stuff. Jimmy yeah, yeah. Milwaukees best ice. Jimmy i remember that. Yeah. Type of doctor. Pediatrician. Jimmy one syllable noise. Unh. [ laughter ] is that right . Jimmy yeah. This is so jimmy thats good. Yeah. Its all good. No wrong answers. Okay. Jimmy plural noun. Plural noun. Jimmy uhhuh. Forks. [ light laughter ] jimmy only two more. Mode of transportation. Starship. [ light laughter ] jimmy and holiday. Christmas. [ cheers and applause ] jimmy we filled out the words for the scene. Are you ready to perform it . Okay. Jimmy lets go. Here we go. Lets do it. [ cheers and applause ] [ laughter ] jimmy hi, santa. Hello, ding dongs. [ laughter ] jimmy youre looking at me like im on your naughty list. I was counting my toys and was one doinker short. [ laughter ] i believe you stole it. Jimmy but papa. [ laughter ] i started making that toy in 200 a. D. [ laughter ] what will the little Jennifer Lawrences think when she wakes up on Christmas Morning with nothing under the apple tree . [ laughter ] jimmy i would never steal such a demure toy. [ laughter ] where were you the night before christmas . Jimmy i was with pickles. [ laughter ] we were listening to the roots holiday album and making snow gerbils. [ applause ] pickles is very hm. Then why did rudolph see you spanking on the roof . [ laughter and applause ] 22 centuries before the toy was missing. [ laughter ] jimmy thats a coincidence. The reason i work so hard is because i get to spread joy to millions of people and go sit by the fire, shaking my nad. [ cheers and applause ] [ laughter ] jimmy i know, i know, i know. [ inaudible ] jimmy yeah, yeah. While eating cookies and drinking milwaukees best ice. [ applause ] jimmy fine. I stole the toy. But i only did it because wait a minute. [ laughter ] i was using a kids voice earlier. Im an elf. I forgot i was an elf. Oh right, oh, and im santa. Jimmy oh, thats right. [ laughter ] ho ho ho, ding dongs, youre silly. Jimmy i stole the toy. I only did it because i wanted to impress my pediatrician. [ laughter ] unh, unh, unh. [ laughter ] every time theres a holiday miracle, i sing my favorite christmas song, jingle forks. [ laughter ] jingle forks jingle forks jingle all the way oh what fun it is to ride in a onehorse open starship [ laughter ] jimmy merry christmas, santa [ cheers and applause ] and scene. That is all for mad lib theater. My thanks to chris pratt. Well be right back with more of the tonight show, everybody. [ cheers and applause ] oh, lifesized dragon hand back scratcher. If only it came in a luffa. It does oh, a raisin rehydrator. It turns them back into grapes. Wow, what an exhausting journey. Thats a good wedding present. Good call. Thank you. And thank you, lady blue. With the blue cash everyday card from american express, you get cash back on purchases with no annual fee. Oh, look at this. Disposable microphone for my uncle bobs 75th a one and done. Yes. Find your voice and then dispose of it. Its more than cash back. Its backed by the service and security of american express. With hotels. Coms for every 10 nights you stay, you get one free. Which is great for families. Finally whatever captain obvious. Hotels. Com. Great for families. Mom and for sore losers volunteer for meals on wheels. We had an instant connection. What was that . I said, delivering to you is always a special treat. Oh. Company, companionship, food. We all need those things. When we get in that spot in life, its kind of nice to have em there. avo through the subaru share the love event, weve helped deliver over one point four million meals to those in need. Get a new subaru, and well donate two hundred and fifty dollars more. Put a little love in your heart. Of reach for far too long s have Health Insurance. Thats been out how . They enrolled through covered california. Its the Health Insurance marketplace where youll find a range of plans from leading Health Insurance companies that offer you the best combination of quality, rates, and benefits. And, through covered california, you may get financial help to pay for coverage. To have Health Insurance starting january 1st, you need to enroll by december 15th. Visit covereca. Com today. [ cheers and applause ] jimmy our next guest is a a fantastic actress. She stars in, and directed, her first feature film called all we had, which is in theaters and on demand this friday. Everyone please welcome the very talented katie holmes [ cheers and applause ] jimmy katie holmes, you look gorgeous. Thank you so much for coming back. Everything great . Thanks. Everythings great. Jimmy yeah, good. Thats good. Yes. Jimmy last time we were here on the show, we played a a game of musical beers. Yes, we did. [ light laughter ] jimmy and thank you for playing that. I didnt know how competitive you were. You ended up diving across the table to grab the beer out of kirks hand. Yes, and can we zoom in on this . [ light laughter ] jimmy yeah, thats can we zoom . Because i think i won. [ laughter ] i mean, its clear in that picture. Jimmy yeah, yeah, you won. You kicked your heels off and just we were playing there, and just dove over yes. Jimmy and ripped it out of kirks hand. [ laughter ] but he claims he won. Jimmy yeah, he claims he won. It was pretty embarrassing. Where is he . Kirk, kirk, kirk. Jimmy kirk, come on, buddy. Yeah. [ light laughter ] yeah, hi. Yeah. Its cool. Its cool. Jimmy that was ice cold, man. Good game. Jimmy see . Good game. Jimmy thats how you handle it. Very classy. Thank you. Ill get you next time. Jimmy give your mom my regards because i always think of your mom because she sent me a we talked about a care package. Yes. Jimmy last time on the show, and your mom sent me one. Yes. Jimmy and that was so thoughtful and so cool. And you sent her one back, i think. Jimmy yeah. Everything from raos. Jimmy yeah, i got and she made a huge spaghetti dinner for all of my nieces and nephews. Jimmy i love it. She gave me this thing called tony packos. Yes. Jimmy and i still have them because i ordered from the company. The pickles and peppers. Jimmy theres pickles and peppers in one, but then, theres, like, a chili like, a hot dog chili sauce. I dont know whats in it. I dont know. Its a chili sauce. It has amazing, and i was just home for thanksgiving. And i drove by tony packos, and i was thinking of you jimmy did you . Because i knew that you loved it, and jimmy oh, i loved that. Its just, that was the most thoughtful cool thing. But, you know what . Toledo is amazing because, you know, theres tony packos. But, i was just home, and i went to one of my favorite places, this lebanese restaurant, and i went in, and i ordered ahead. And the owner came up to me, and he said my uncle had passed and he said, i saw the paper today. He goes, its on me. [ audience aws ] jimmy come on. And i was just like jimmy people like that, real people. It was just amazing, anyway. Jimmy people care about each other. No, i love that. I know. Are we getting to go back there for the holidays and a a family gettogether . Yes. Jimmy what does the Holmes Family do . What do they do . Any traditions . Well, we arent musically inclined by nature. But, over the holidays, it really comes out and we do the 12 days of christmas. And there are a bunch of us. And my sister, because shes the oldest, always gets the five golden rings. Jimmy its the best part, yeah. Its the best. Jimmy you got to give that to her. You have to, and i get whatevers left over because im the baby. And we tend to call people and sing to them. Jimmy like friends . Like, well call you. Jimmy you will . Yeah. I can get your number. Jimmy yeah. And i will call you and nancy, and you might put the phone in the garbage, which i know a lot of people do and walk away. Jimmy no, thats not true. You call yes. Jimmy thats so nice. On the first day of jimmy i know the song, of course. [ laughter ] im getting an early treat here, yeah. I know where it ends up. Yeah. Five golden thats your sister. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Jimmy wait, i was thinking it would be kind of fun. I want to do this tradition too. Maybe ill just call random people. [ laughter ] you could call random people. You dont have to leave the house. Jimmy yeah, ill just do that. Yeah. Jimmy i love this idea. All right, im gonna set thats going to be a tradition of mine. Weve got to talk about your movie. This is unbelievable. You directed a movie. I did. Jimmy did you like doing it . Did you enjoy it . I loved it jimmy you did . [ cheers and applause ] i loved it. Yes, yes. Jimmy its called all we had. Its called all we had, and its a mother daughter story. Yes. Its a its a mother daughter story, but its they have a very untraditional relationship. So theyre almost like sisters. And theyre kind of best friends, and theyre two girls on the road surviving. And it was a wonderful experience. I had an Incredible Team around me. I had a wonderful cinematographer named brett pollack, a wonderful production designer, michael fitzgerald. It was produced by jane rosenthal. And the cast, we had a great cast, luke wilson. Jimmy oh, luke wilsons great. Hes so funny. Jimmy no, i love him. Hes fun on our show. Hes hilarious. Its great. Yes. Jimmy but this is a big deal. I mean, do you know how much work goes into, like, directing . I would never do that. It was scary. Jimmy i could never do it. I would be like, i dont know. Just do whatever. [ laughter ] no, its not true. Its not true. You work so hard. Jimmy no. You work so, so hard. Jimmy oh, please, no. Yes, i do, but no. [ laughter ] so for my next movie, will you be in it . Jimmy of course, yeah. Im very available. [ cheers and applause ] im very available. Of course, i would love to. Please . Jimmy id love to be directed by you. Oh, my god. Jimmy i would think that would be a a super fun set to be on a a katie holmes movie. We had a great time because i mean, ive been in this business, luckily, for about 20 years now, and i love being on a happy set. And i love it when people actually value me and, like, think im good. Jimmy yeah. So, i wanted to provide that for my actors. And so that required, like, i had great friends. My friend julie would always bring, like, cakes and cookies and lunch because i always think that you need to be wellfed. Jimmy food is great. And it was an independent movie, so it was, like, we need lots of food. And jimmy its a lot of work for no money. [ laughter ] yeah, exactly. And then, i mean, beyonce, every morning. Jimmy she would come to the set . I mean, not really. [ laughter ] but in spirit. Jimmy oh, you would play music . We would play her. [ laughter ] jimmy i was like, thats so nice. Of course she would come see katie holmes. Of course. Jimmy of course beyonce would come every day bringing cupcakes. It was like, what . Wed have coffee. Jimmy it wouldnt happen on my movie. Yeah, exactly, yeah. Wed go through the scene. Jimmy oh, so you would have, like, fun dance parties and stuff . Yes, because this movie, its a mother daughter story, and theres a lot of high emotions. And first of all, i mean, thats intense. Jimmy you got to keep the vibe. So you need to have some fun. Jimmy yeah. So we did a lot of drunk in love. Jimmy yeah. And we had great dancers on our set. Jimmy i want to show everyone a clip. Heres luke wilson and katie holmes in her directorial debut, all we had. Take a look at this. [ chuckles ] you got a great smile. [ chuckles ] okay. You know, i can fix your first premolar for you. Im a dentist. Dont be embarrassed. Its fine. You can hardly see it, except when youre laughing. Well, it has been a while since ive laughed. Maybe i can fix that for you, too. [ cheers and applause ] jimmy katie holmes all we had is in theaters and available on demand this friday. Well be right back with a a performance from john mayer. Stick around, everybody [ cheers and applause ] Liberty Mutual stood with me when i was too busy with the kids to get a repair estimate. I just snapped a photo and got an estimate in 24 hours. My Insurance Company definitely doesnt have that. You can leave worry behind when liberty stands with you™ Liberty Mutual insurance sometimes, you feel the need hanes wants to end the smellfie. Those quick self sniffs. To check the ol smell levels. But this thing weve all done doesnt need to be a thing. Theres a smart way to stay fresh. Hanes with freshiq advanced odorprotection technology. Bonus packs available now. Hi. How can i help . This holiday, on americas most awarded brand, during the ford year end event. Ford, the brand with the most 5star ratings. The highest owner loyalty. And awardwinning value from kelley blue book. Giving drivers what matters most. Thats how you become americas bestselling brand. Shop now during the ford year end event. Get a thousand dollars ford smart bonus cash on select models, on top of all other great offers. See your local ford dealer today. [ cheers and applause ] jimmy this guy knows how to do it. This guy is fantastic. Hes a seventime grammy Award Winning musician. Hes out with his [ cheers and applause ] yeah, hes great. Hes out with his first single in three years. Performing love on the weekend, give it up for john mayer [ cheers and applause ] its a friday we finally made it i cant believe i get to see your face youve been working and ive been waiting to pick you up and take you from this place love on the weekend love on the weekend like only we can like only we can love on the weekend love on the weekend im coming up and im loving every minute of it you be the dj ill be the driver you put your feet up in the getaway car im flying fast like a a wanted man i want you baby like you cant understand oh love on the weekend love on the weekend we found a message in a bottle we were drinking love on the weekend love on the weekend i hate your guts cause im loving every minute of it i gotta leave you its gonna hurt me my clothes are dirty and my friends are getting worried down there below us under the clouds baby take my hand and pull me down down down down and ill be dreaming of the next time we can go into another serotonin overflow love on the weekend love on the weekend im busted up but im loving every minute of it love on the weekend love on the weekend im looking forward to love im looking forward to love oh yeah love on the weekend im looking forward to love im looking forward to love oh yeah m love on the weekend love on the weekend [ cheers and applause ] jimmy fantastic thank you, my man. John mayer [ cheers and applause ] love on the weekend. John mayer. Its out right now. Well be right back, everybody. [ cheers and applause ] all the care your family needs. All connected for you. P is for privileges. O is for ordinarily i wouldnt. L is for layers of luxury. A is for alll the way back. R is for read my mind. And i. Cant see a thing. S. See you in the morning. Polaris, from united. Am i actually pushing these guys who ran out of gas six miles on a lonely highway . Or is this a metaphor for how im constantly pushing myself to make a tastier sandwich . Like my new pepper jack ranch spicy chicken sandwich with spicy pepper jack cheese, spicy ranch, and spicy allwhitemeat chicken. But judging from the thirddegree sunburn, and the fact that i cant feel my legs, id say im actually pushing this car. Theres gotta be a better way to get new customers. The pepper jack ranch spicy chicken sandwich. Taste it before its gone. Yep, im lost. [ cheers and applause ] jimmy my thanks to chris pratt, katie holmes, john mayer once again [ cheers and applause ] love on the weekend. And of course the roots right there, from philadelphia, pennsylvania. [ cheers and applause ] stay tuned for late night with seth meyers. Thank you for watching. Have a great night. I hope to see you tomorrow. Byebye, everybody. [ cheers and applause ] [ cheers and applause ] announcer from 30 Rockefeller Plaza in new york, its late night with seth meyers. Tonight Shaquille Oneal comedian and author Abbi Jacobson music from Miranda Lambert featuring the 8g band with abe cunningham. [ cheers and applause ] ladies and gentlemen, seth meyers. Seth good evening, everybody im seth meyers. This is late night. How is everybody doing tonight . [ cheers and applause ] thats great. In that case lets get to the news, Vice President joe biden said yesterday that he may run for office in 2020 telling reporters, quote, what the hell, man. I dont know how to tell you this joe but we already elec