Mixtape, and featuring the legendary roots crew. Questlove 584 yeah steve and now, here he is, jimmy fallon [ cheers and applause ] jimmy thank you very much. Oh, welcome. Enjoy the show. Welcome to the show. Welcome, everybody. Welcome, welcome, welcome, welcome, welcome. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Welcome. [ cheers and applause ] welcome to the tonight show. This is it, baby. [ cheers and applause ] this is the show to be at. This is the show tonight. Welcome, everybody. Wow, what a great crowd. Guys, heres what everybodys talking about. I saw that al gore met with donald trump today to discuss Climate Change. [ light laughter ] they probably talked about how Climate Change could lead to massive floods in places like new york city. Trump was like, thats why i live on the 58th floor. [ laughter ] when it gets around 57, i bring the yacht around. [ applause ] the other big news is that trump appointed ben carson as his secretary of housing and urban development. [ laughter ] that means that trump talked with ben carson and al gore in the same day which is [ laughter ] kind of like popping an ambien before you watch the weather channel. [ cheers and applause ] meanwhile, trump announced that the ceo of disney will be advising his transition team. [ laughter ] thanks to him, trump wont have to build a wall anymore. Hell just charge so much for admission that nobody will want to come in. [ cheers and applause ] and donald trump is still trying to decide who to nominate for secretary of state. Hes reportedly considering david petraeus, mitt romney, rudy giuliani, john bolton, and jon huntsman. Apparently trump is taking them all on a group date tonight, and one of them gets to join him in the fantasy suite. [ laughter and applause ] [ as trump ] lets go to the fantasy suite. Take you in a helicopter. [ laughter ] this is cool. The white house Just Launched a a new app where you point your phones camera at a dollar bill and a 3d image of the white house pops up that you can explore. The kids call it a cool thing to play with, while nicholas cage calls it [ as cage ] a hidden map to unspeakable treasures. [ laughter and applause ] you dont know whats in there. Who, why, where. In tv news it was announced that showtime has canceled its series, masters of sex. [ audience aws ] men said it went on long enough and women said it ended way too soon. [ applause ] actually, i just saw a new study that finds that wearing socks while having sex may make it more enjoyable. While wearing socks with sandals will make sex highly unlikely. [ laughter ] i read that. I read that today. Steve thats a good study. Jimmy and check this out. Steven hawking filmed a new Public Service announcement about obesity, saying people eat too much and move too little. [ laughter ] so, it got weird when hawking added yo mama so fat, when she gets on the scale, it says, one at a time. [ laughter ] jimmy oh, my gosh. One at a time . Steve one at a time . Jimmy why would he say that . Why would he say that . Thats not nice of him. Steve thats rude. Jimmy thats not nice of him to say that. Yo mama so fat she walked past the tv and i missed three episodes. [ applause ] jimmy she walked in front of the tv steve three episodes. Jimmy and he missed three episodes. Steve not one episode, three episodes. Jimmy i cant believe hes saying that stuff. Enough. Yo mama so fat, santa sits on her lap. Jimmy ill give you that one. [ applause ] ill give you that one, steve. Santa sits on her lap. Steve yeah, thats how large she is. [ laughter ] jimmy finally, you guys, i read that [ laughter ] i read that the new uber update tracks where you go for five minutes after your car drops you off. [ audience groans ] some users say its creepy. Then they went back to getting in a car with a stranger and telling them exactly where they live. [ laughter ] we have a great show tonight. Give it up for the roots [ cheers and applause ] jimmy hi, everybody. Big show tonight. It is monday. Were so happy to be back. We have a big week of shows coming up. Tomorrow night chris pratt will be here. [ cheers and applause ] and were going to be doing a a little mad libs theater together. It will be fun. Plus we have katie holmes is coming on and john mayer will be joining us. [ cheers and applause ] then later this week, we have edward norton, robert de niro, pharrell williams, and Dwayne Johnson all dropping by. Its going to be good. Steve wow [ cheers and applause ] jimmy but first, joining us tonight, she is a terrific actress. Her new movie 20th century women is full of amazing performances, Annette Bening is here tonight. [ cheers and applause ] yeah. Shes my pal. Shes awesome. Steve wonderful. Jimmy annette, the roots, and i are going to play family feud right after this commercial break. So you dont want to miss it. Its good. Should be good. Should be good. Are you playing with us . Steve no. Jimmy youre not. [ audience aws ] well, maybe because we have a a special guest coming. Steve ooh. [ audience oohs ] jimmy plus, hes the Emmy Award Winning host we dont. [ laughter ] but we might. Steve we dont know, right . Jimmy i love this dude. I want him on the show every single night. I cant get enough. Steve pure energy. Jimmy hes just positive and funny. Gosh, just love this guy. Hes the Emmy Award Winning host of the steve harvey show. This is his new book called jump. Steve harvey is stopping by tonight. [ cheers and applause ] how do you not like that guy . Hes a good dude. And we have great music tonight, oh my gosh, have you been getting compliments on this, quest . Questlove yeah. Jimmy questlove is produced this with Linmanuel Miranda and tariq. [ cheers and applause ] and im on it. I make an appearance on it. Questlove youre on it. Jimmy i may have or may not have played the track 30 times. Just to try to get my count up on spotify. [ laughter ] exactly. I just want the popularity. Everybodys looking at the jimmy fallon song. Yeah right. It is the greatest all the work that went into this, congratulations, man. We have music from the hamilton mixtape tonight. [ cheers and applause ] are you doing my shot . Questlove yeah. Jimmy busta is busta is here . [ cheers and applause ] questlove busta rhymes, yes hes here. Jimmy busta rhymes is here . [ cheers and applause ] questlove he is. Jimmy what more could you want . Steve what more do you want . Jimmy what a great show. Hey, guys, i read something that really disturbed me recently. Steve whats that . Immy American Kids are ranked 30th in the world in terms of math skills. Steve ugh. Jimmy nobody seems to know how to turn this around. I think the problem is that todays kids just cant relate to oldfashioned things like numbers. [ laughter ] so, weve updated math to make equations more about modern stuff that kids can relate to in a segment called popular mathematics. Check it out. [ cheers and applause ] popular mathematics mathematics [ laughter ] popular mathmatics [ laughter ] jimmy do you understand the bit . Steve no, i do not. Jimmy all right, let me tell you. [ laughter ] heres the first equation here. If you take an iguana. Steve sure. Jimmy you plus cocacola, equals iggy pop. [ laughter ] do you see what im saying . Do you understand . Steve almost. Jimmy almost . Let me give you another example here. Steve give me another one, please. Jimmy if you take the grinchs smile steve sure. Jimmy plus the loraxs hair, it equals donald trump. [ laughter and applause ] [ cheers and applause ] you see what im getting at . Steve almost. Jimmy if you take mitt romney steve mitt romney jimmy plus two sips of beer. Steve two sips of beer jimmy it equals lit romney. [ laughter and applause ] whoa, whoa, whoa. [ applause ] steve macarena . I understand the macarena. Jimmy if you take an office party steve office party. Jimmy plus mistletoe. Steve okay. Jimmy it equals the hr department. [ laughter ] its just a bad idea. Just dont do it. Its a bad idea. No. Heres another one. If you take ron weasley steve ron weasley, yes. Jimmy plus a bakery. Steve ron weasley, bakery. Jimmy it equals a ginger bread man. [ laughter ] a gingerbread man. Steve thats making a a little more sense. The fog is lifting. Jimmy if you take Kevin James Steve kevin james. Jimmy plus snoop dogg. Steve snoop dogg. Jimmy it equals james blunt. Do you see what im saying . [ cheers ] do you get the idea of it, at least . Steve i at least get its some sort of mathematics without numbers. Jimmy if you take Neil Armstrong steve love Neil Armstrong. Jimmy add a lawn mower steve sure. Jimmy plus Mike Tyson Steve yep jimmy it equals Neil Degrasse tyson. [ laughter and applause ] steve heyoh dont kneel on de grass. Jimmy finally steve one more example and i think ill have it. Jimmy if you take mr. T steve mr. T jimmy plus an animated gif, it equals tgif. There you go right there [ cheers and applause ] thats all the time we have for popular mathematics. Well be right back with more of the tonight show. [ cheers and applause ] Liberty Mutual stood with me when i was too busy with the kids to get a repair estimate. I just snapped a photo and got an estimate in 24 hours. My Insurance Company definitely doesnt have that. You can leave worry behind when liberty stands with you™ Liberty Mutual insurance youany profession,ob, image matters. I want some gray. But not too much. Only touch of gray uses oxygen to gently blend away some gray, but not all for that perfect salt and pepper look. Satisfaction guaranteed. Just you and the look you want. 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Give it up for steve harvey [ cheers and applause ] mr. Fallon, how are you . Questlove, whats up, man . Thank you, folks. [ cheers and applause ] all right. Lets do it. Yeah. All right. Well. [ cheers and applause ] well, hows everybody doing . [ cheers and applause ] well, folks, welcome to the tonight show family feud. Im your man, steve harvey. [ cheers and applause ] all right. We got a good one for you tonight, everybody. From philadelphia, p. A. , its the roots family. [ cheers and applause ] i like that. I like that, boys. That looks like the victory pose there. And from, well, i dont i dont know where theyre from. Its the 20th century women family [ cheers and applause ] all right. Its time to play feud. Give me jimmy, give me questlove. [ cheers and applause ] all right, fellas, lets go. We got the top four answers are on the board. Here we go. We surveyed the tonight show audience for this. [ cheers and applause ] name an animal that some people sound like when they laugh. [ family feud ring ] jimmy im going to say a a hyena. [ cheers ] a hyena. [ ding ] [ cheers and applause ] jimmy thats what im talking about. You gonna pass or play, jimmy . Jimmy huh . Pass or play . Play lets keep racking up some points. Theyre going to play. Jimmy were going to play, absolutely. [ cheers ] now, folks, heres another thing you have to keep in mind. Were only playing with two strikes. [ audience oohs ] hi, annette. Hi. Love you, darling, for real. Name an animal that some people sound like when they laugh. A parrot. [ laughter ] im really sorry. Jimmy wow. Good a no, thats good. That was fine. [ laughter ] polly want a cracker. A parrot. [ buzzer ] jimmy ooh, all right. No problem. Theres only one strike. Greta. Greta, only one strike but you only get two, and then we go over there, and i promise you, they dont know this one. [ laughter ] greta, name an animal that some people sound like when they laugh. A cat. A cat. [ laughter ] meow, meow, meow. [ laughter ] jimmy whats up . All good . Which one was that . Meow, meow, meow. [ laughter ] do it again. Jimmy meow, meow, meow, meow, meow. Its very common. Its very common. That has got to be up there somewhere. Thats got to be up there. Oh, that has got to be up there somewhere. You do it. You do it. Meow, meow. [ laughter ] all right. Jimmy absolutely. [ talking over each other ] a cat. [ buzzer ] [ audience aws ] jimmy oh, all right. All right. Quest and the roots, its your chance to win it, man. Yall can steal it. Name an animal that some people sound like when they laugh. Questlove we are going to go with horse. Good answer, good answer. [ applause ] let me hear it. Tariq me . Yeah, let me hear it, the horse laugh. [ imitates horse whinny ] [ laughter ] wait. Oh, wait. [ applause ] come on, tariq, do it one more time. [ imitates horse whinny ] [ laughter ] meow, meow, meow. [ imitates horse whinny ] come on, quest, you do it. Yeah. Come on, jay. [ oinking ] [ laughter ] [ applause ] youre a damn musician. How you cant make a sound . Youre musicians. You play by ear. Give me the horse. [ imitates horse whinny ] there it is. Thank you very much. Its a horse [ cheers and applause ] all right. All right, lets see what the remaining answers were. Number four. [ ding ] donkey. Number two. [ ding ] all pig. Wow. That was good. Hey, lets go to question two. Give me annette benning. Give me tariq trotter. [ cheers and applause ] all right, guys, here we go. Name a part of the body that often itches. [ family feud ring ] feet. [ laughter ] your feet. [ buzzer ] annette . Nose. Your nose. [ ding ] [ cheers and applause ] jimmy yeah pass or play . Im pretty sure were gonna play. Jimmy lets play, yeah. Here we go. All right. Greta. Yes . Your chance to redeem yourself. Cat laugh. Name a part of the body that often itches. My ankles. [ laughter ] no. This is youre giving embarrassing answers. [ laughter ] some of your answers are going to have to have a possibility of being up here. Doesnt anybody elses ankles itch . No. Who ankles just itch . Come on. Right . Thats like prime mosquito territory. Thats prime mosquito territory. Yeah. Okay. Well, thats true. Lets see if its up there. Jimmy great point. [ laughter ] [ buzzer ] jimmy, you got one strike, only one left. You got to be careful. The roots family can steal. Name a part of the body that often itches. Say it. Jimmy what are testicles . [ laughter ] testicles. [ ding ] [ cheers and applause ] all right. Nice save. Annette, only one strike. One more, they can steal. Be careful. Name a part of the body that often itches. Your butt. [ cheers and applause ] this is a late night show, annette. Lets go a little deeper than that. Jimmy here we go. Whats the alternative late night show word, which is the show i want, name a part of your body that itches . Your bottom. [ laughter ] did i go the other direction . Jimmy no, no, no its great. This is a Christian Lady right here. [ light laughter ] she went from butt to bottom. One more time, annette. Your ass. Yes [ cheers and applause ] your ass [ ding ] [ cheers and applause ] jimmy fantastic that was great. Jimmy i love it. Just go with it. [ laughter ] you got a great career. Youre acting, youre in movies. Dont even worry about this. You are not going to get this. Name a name another part of your body, other than annettes hard to reach ankle, that often itches. Your scalp. Your head. Wow. [ cheers and applause ] wow. Right . That has possibility. Your scalp. [ ding ] [ cheers and applause ] hey, lets go to our third round and final question. This is a tie breaker. Give me greta. Give me james. All right. This is a tie breaker. This is the last round. This is worth triple the points, so its anybodys game. Someone could win it here. Jimmy come on, greta, you can do it. Come on, greta. Come on, greta. This is like this could be like the first thing that comes to your mind. [ laughter ] name a song that has the word christmas in the title. [ family feud ring ] wish you a merry christmas. I wish you a merry christmas. [ ding ] ooh. [ cheers and applause ] two answers can top it though. All i want for christmas is you. [ cheers and applause ] jimmy not you, steve. Thats the name of the song. Oh. Jimmy the name of the song. I was looking at her trying to work that out. All i want for christmas is you. [ ding ] jimmy we won [ cheers and applause ] we won, we won, we won you got to guess all the others. You dont get the points yet. Jimmy we had to get number one, we did it, right . No, that aint how the hey, man. Hey, listen. You aint the only one on tv, jimmy. [ light laughter ] there are other shows. Let us people with lesser numbers win. Give us a [ light laughter ] jimmy you know what im talking please, give me a a break. You own you rule television right now, my friend. Thank you, sir, thank you. [ laughter ] okay, jimmy, here we go. Name a song that has the word christmas in the title. [ laughter ] jimmy do they know its christmas. What . Jimmy do they know its christmas . [ light laughter ] do they know its christmas . Thats thats a song . Do they know its christmas . Jimmy its a lot of yeah. Do they know its theres a a lot of ill check with the black dude. [ laughter ] do they know its christmas . [ buzzer ] jimmy i dont know why i did that. Only one strike. Annette, we need one strike or they get a chance to steal. You can do it, though. Annette, name a song that has the word christmas in the title. All i want for christmas is my two front teeth. All i want for christmas is my two front teeth. [ buzzer ] [ audience ohs ] questlove. Questlove whats up . This could win the championship. This is all or nothing. Questlove uhhuh. This is on the line. If you can pull this out, you steal, your team wins the game. Quest, this is your shot. Name a song that has the word christmas in the title. Questlove white christmas. [ cheers and applause ] white. Questlove white. Say it one more time. Questlove white. White christmas. Questlove white christmas. Im dreaming questlove dreaming of a a white christmas. [ laughter ] none of my family coming over. [ laughter ] white christmas. [ ding ] [ cheers and applause ] we have a champ. We have a winner. Its the questlove and the roots family, man. [ cheers and applause ] well see you next time on the feud. Thanks, everybody. [ cheers and applause ] oh look at this, a raisin rehydrator. It turns them back into grapes. Wow, what an exhausting journey. Thats a good wedding present. Good call. With the blue cash everyday card you get cash back on purchases with no annual fee. Backed by the service and security of American Express. Lips appear to age fasterno worries skin. Now theres chapstick total hydration. 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What . This is ridiculous theres one of these. Sam, i gotta go. Is this my car . What . This is ridiculous this cant be happening this cant be happening oh, its happening sweetheart. Oh, its happening sweetheart. Shut up shut up thats why state farm is there, what a day. With car insurance, for when things go wrong. But also here with car loans, to help life go right. State farm. What a day [ cheers and applause ] jimmy we are joined right now by a multiple golden globe awardwinning actress. Shes currently on the big screen in a big movie called rules dont apply. Starting christmas day, her new film, 20th century women, will open in new york and los angeles. Please welcome the immensely talented Annette Bening [ cheers and applause ] jimmy hi. Welcome back to the show. Hey, great to be back. Jimmy you look gorgeous, and thank you for playing family feud with me. It was so fun. Jimmy we made a great team. My parrot answer was pathetic. Jimmy no, i had [ laughter ] i had bad answers. I mean, i get nervous. I do too. Jimmy thats what makes the game fun, family feud. Naturally. Jimmy but i think the roots won. Congratulations to them. Yeah. [ cheers and applause ] great. Yeah. Well because you know youve been on the show tonight. You know i enjoy winning. You do. Youre very competitive. Jimmy yeah. Yeah. Jimmy we had fun last time you were here. We played a little game we did. I found myself getting extremely competitive. I know it was supposed to be just fun, but i really wanted to beat you. Jimmy i think you were throwing thing at me last time. Was i . Jimmy were you . Would i do that . Jimmy would i . Yeah. [ laughter ] we were playing flip cup. A fun game of flip cup and you almost beat me and then last minute, i won. [ laughter ] you did win. Jimmy yeah, i did. Yeah. I really did. Kind of hurt me. Jimmy yeah. Kind of hurt your feelings there. [ laughter ] no, but your son tweeted at me and said, the family honor has to be restored. I will beat you at flip cup and avenge my mom. [ laughter ] all right. Jimmy thats how serious it got. Good kid. Jimmy yeah, good kid. Yeah. [ cheers and applause ] lets talk about your movies. Rules dont apply is out right now. You can go see that. And your husband was here, who directed that masterfully, and it was great. And now, 20th century women. Congratulations on this one. Thank you. Jimmy this ones fun as well. Thank you. Jimmy great cast. Great cast. Yeah, greta was here. Jimmy greta gerwig. We love greta. And we have elle fanning, billy crudup. Yes. Jimmy he was here the other night. Couldnt say more nice things. Well, no one has anything bad to say about him. He loved working with you so much. It was amazing. It was really a joy. We were a really Close Company and mike mills who directed it really made that happen between us so it was a jimmy great. It was a joy. Jimmy and he wrote it as well, mike mills . He wrote it. It takes place in Santa Barbara in 1979. Its very much from his life. Jimmy wow. And your son. I dont know this actor. His name is lucas. Jimmy yeah. Hes fantastic. Incredible. Jimmy oh my god, youll be hearing about this kid. Yes. Absolutely. Jimmy i really you had to smoke a lot in the film. I did. Jimmy are you a smoker in real life . Im not a smoker. I used to be, and when i smoked in movies, i sort of secretly loved it when i had to smoke a a lot. [ laughter ] now i dont smoke so they have herbal cigarettes that we smoke that look pretty real and theyre made out of chamomile and so we just smoke like crazy. [ light laughter ] jimmy yeah, but you dont get that buzz from it or anything. No buzz. Jimmy i cant smoke. I tried smoking. I know, yeah. Jimmy im awful. Yeah, no. [ light laughter ] jimmy i tried. I really went for it. And like, me and my friend bought a pack of cigarettes, which is a stupid thing to do. Kids, dont do this. [ light laughter ] but we had heard about this thing where you light a a cigarette and put it between your arms. You ever heard of this . Wow. Jimmy and whoever pulls your arm away first is a wimp. [ laughter ] of course, its the stupidest thing ever. Like two idiots going, oh my god. We just stayed like that until the cigarette went out. Oh my god. Jimmy neither one of us pulled away. Wow. Jimmy yeah, were real tough guys. [ laughter ] give it a try . Jimmy really smart people. But i could never get into it. I thought it would be cool. I cant. But he pulled it off. Thats the thing with acting where i go, i couldnt do that. So much part of mikes mom in life she really smoked a a lot, so he would then the character is sort of based on his mom. So, yeah. Jimmy yeah. What cigarettes were they . Are they kools . Theyre a brand made in england, i think theyre called honeysuckle. Jimmy oh, stop. But we faked it. Theyre supposed to be salems. Jimmy what a cute name. [ laughter ] honeysuckle. I mean, come on, for cigarettes. I want to show everyone a clip here. This is great. This is Annette Bening and elle fanning in the new film, 20th century women. Opens in new york city and Los Angeles Christmas day. Check this out. Youre good at hiding stuff, huh . My mom calls it compartmentalizing. Apparently i do that a lot. Are you helping him . Im trying. Really . What about you . Have you thought about your impact on him . Its always about the mother. Do you think youve moved on since his dad . You know that youre not actually a therapist. [ cheers and applause ] jimmy you were great. Youre fantastic. Congrats on all the buzz. Oh, youre the greatest. Annette bening, 20th century women opens nationwide january 20th. New york and l. A. On christmas. Steve harvey joins us after the break. Stick around, everybody. [ cheers and applause ] hi. How can i help . Do you have anything i can borrow for the Holiday Party . Of course cute do you have anything for people . 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Shop now during the ford year end event. Get a thousand dollars ford smart bonus cash on select models, on top of all other great offers. See your local ford dealer today. Lift up your head and keep moving or let the paranoia haunt you . Everybody lack confidence, everybody lack confidence i keep my feefifofum i keep my heart undone the strong in me, i still smile. [ cheers and applause ] jimmy our next guest is the Emmy Award Winning host of the very popular daytime talk show, steve harvey. Hes also a bestselling author. This is his brandnew book titled jump take the leap of faith to achieve your life of abundance. Its available right now. Please welcome the multitalented, the always entertaining, steve harvey [ cheers and applause ] jimmy thats good. Come on. Thats got to feel good, right . Thats good love. I like that. Jimmy that feels good, right . Yeah, absolutely. [ cheers and applause ] thats good. Jimmy youre the best, man. I love you. And i i do. You feel me . I believe that, man. Jimmy yeah, no, i do. I mean it. I love you too, jimmy. Jimmy i really do. Did i tell you this last time . I was in the icu for a couple days because i hit my finger and i looked forward to seeing you every day because theres nothing on tv that makes you laugh, makes you feel good. Yeah, i would watch you and thank you so much. I make sick people want to stay in the hospital. [ laughter ] thats a rare talent, folks. Most people want to go home. I got people checking in. [ laughter ] jimmy is your birthday coming up . Yeah, man, january 17. Ill be 60. [ cheers and applause ] jimmy you look fantastic i know. I know. Jimmy you know you look good. Yeah, yeah. I know. Just go on and take it all in. I know. Jimmy any goals . A little bit more, there it is. Jimmy any goals for 60 . Yeah, at 60, i want to have a six pack. That was my goal. [ light laughter ] i want to have a six pack. Jimmy okay. Yeah, not going to happen. [ light laughter ] jimmy no, no. Its not good. I have it. Jimmy its in there. I have it. You seen that muscle on them dudes where you see them taking the pictures and they have that muscle that goes down into their underwear, that line . Jimmy yeah. I have that too. Jimmy you do . I had to dig for it, but its there. [ laughter ] and then when i find it, it hurts. [ laughter ] when i find it jimmy if you can find it, yeah. Yeah. Jimmy it hurts a little bit. Im digging too hard. Jimmy thats too deep. Absolutely, yeah. Well, i read a lot of a lot of the Great Stories in this book, jump. A lot of them about getting your start and actually not actually living well but getting out of that situation. One of them, we didnt talk about, but you hosted the Miss Universe pageant last year. [ laughter ] when you say it and then you chuckle behind it, what am i supposed to take from that . [ laughter ] because you said you hosted the Miss Universe, ha ha. [ laughter ] jimmy let me do it again. You hosted the Miss Universe pageant, meow, meow. [ laughter ] meow, meow, meow. Meow, meow, meow, meow, meow, meow. [ laughter ] yeah. Jimmy no. And heres the way i remember it happening. At the end, you were about to announce the drum rolls gone and you go and the Miss Universe is and you say miss miss colombia. Jimmy miss colombia. And then you go, im sorry, no, not true. And she freaked out. [ laughter ] shes like, oh my god. It didnt happen that quick. It wasnt that quick. It was a full minute of pure hell. What yall talking about yeah . [ laughter ] jimmy they know, they know. Thats what the audience it was longer than that. [ laughter ] jimmy its about five minutes, steve. It was like hell up there. Jimmy what was it like . It was crazy, man, because look, im a smart guy, you know. I can read. [ laughter ] jimmy yeah. I read the teleprompter. But the guy in my ear said, read the next name. Now, the teleprompter just said, and the new 2 2015 Miss Universe is and he said, read the next name. Now, now. I say miss colombia. Crowd goes crazy. He goes, great job, steve. I go in the back. Four minutes later, i hear a a lot of words that you cant say on tv. [ light laughter ] explicit, explicit, explicit, and they said, we said the wrong name. And then a guy said, what are we going to do . And the guy said, well straighten it out in the media tomorrow. And i said, no, man, im going to go do it now. And i walked out there. Jimmy yeah. I didnt [ cheers and applause ] jimmy how did you do that . Why did i do it . Jimmy no, how did you do it . Oh, i dont know, man. [ light laughter ] i dont know. I dont know what the hell i was thinking about. Man, i was it was the most gut wrenching walk ive ever had in my life, and i went back out there, but you know, i was i was brought up that way, man, to kind of just face whatever it is. So i went out there and dealt with it, and i tried to straighten it out. And it was a family on the front row from colombia who was just cheering for me. When i walked out there and i said that. [ imitating spanish ] [ laughter ] i was getting cussed out in spanish so hard. Jimmy oh my gosh. So you know, the new one is in the philippines this year. Theyre actually doing Miss Universe in the philippines this year. Jimmy they are. And are youre going back . Hell yeah, im going back. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] well, i was one of the people that watched this video, and its you talking to the audience, like i always talk to my audience in between commercial breaks and just asking questions, i talk to them. You were talking to the family feud audience after the show, and just giving advice. It was a moment, man. I was just having with the audience. Im in the laugh business, right . We make people laugh. Jimmy yeah. Thats our work. But after the show was over, i try to Say Something meaningful to people. I was just telling people that if you want to be successful, you have to jump. You know, you have to take a a leap of faith. You cannot live your life safely standing on that cliff and never jumping, man. If you do that, man, your life aint going to be nothing, man. Youre just going to be waking up existing, talking about, man, theres got to be more to my life than this. You know, i wrote in the book like on october 8th 1985, i walked in a comedy club for the first time. Ive never been at a comedy club. I won amateur night, 50. I went to work the next day, quit my job. I jumped right away. Wasnt the smartest jump. [ laughter ] what i discovered is, you know, when you first jump, the parachute dont open right away. [ laughter ] jimmy okay, thats good to know. Yeah, you need to know that when you jump. The parachute dont open right away. Jimmy and you just hit rock . I mean, i became homeless for a period of time, you know, i struggled, but you know, home lived in a car for three years. But hell, im on the jimmy fallon tonight show. [ cheers and applause ] jimmy the parachute is open. It opened, baby. Jimmy the parachute opened. [ cheers and applause ] yeah. I love it. I love this book. Steve harvey, everybody. Check out the new book jump. Well be right back with a a performance from the hamilton mixtape. Stick around, everybody. [ cheers and applause ] remember 2007 . Smartphones . O m g ten years later, nothings really changed. Its time to snap out of it. Hello moto. Snap on a jbl speaker. Put a 70 screen on a wall. Get a 10x optical zoom. Get excited world. Hello moto. Moto is here. The new moto z with motomods. Save up to 400 when you trade in your old phone and switch to verizon. [burke] hot dog. Seen it. We know a thing or two because weve seen a thing or two. We are farmers. Bumpadum, bumbumbumbum no. They come from thes come stomach. Heart. Give the gift of quality time with an applebees gift card. And receive a 10 bonus card for yourself. Only at applebees. People spend less time lying awake with aches and pains with advil pm than with tylenol pm. 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Can i pick the genre . Nope. With the blue cash everyday card you get cash back on purchases with no annual fee. Backed by the service and security of American Express. [ cheers and applause ] jimmy our next guests are featured on the hamilton mixtape, which is the number one album on itunes right now. [ cheers and applause ] performing my shot, give it up for the roots, busta rhymes, and joell ortiz [ cheers and applause ] whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa ayo mugshot gun shot dope shot jump shot take your pick but you only get one shot advice from a schoolteacher to a young tot applyin a sticker to his spiderman lunchbox when even role models tell us were born to be felons were never gettin into harvard or Carnegie Mellon and we gon end up either robbin somebody or killin its not fair thats all they can tell us thats why i hustle hella hard never celebrate a holiday thatll be the day i coulda finally hit the lottery i refuse to ever lose or throw my shot away or chalk it up as just another one that got away so im unapologetic im on my calesthenics if i have given it all i got i cannot regret it my final destinations different from where i was headed cause ima shoot for the stars to get it one shot im not throwin away my shot i said im not throwin away my shot cause im just like my country young scrappy and hungry and im not throwin away my shot i said im not throwin away my shot no im not throwin away my shot yo im just like my country young scrappy and hungry im not throwin away my shot when opportunity knock you dont send anyone to get it answer the door welcome it let it in or regret it they said if you cant beat em you join em i said, forget it once you join em youre buildin a ceilin the way youre headed be American Express how you feel and take the credit dont settle for 87 go premium unleaded and take off shake all the hate off its over its they loss the payoffs their weight off your shoulders must admit im feelin um kinda um lighter as a writer with this fire and desire to go higher than a Stealth Fighter pilot with my eye on every prize i surprise you guys im a prize fighter my nine to five describe your scribe survive minor setbacks and take steps back from pied pipers be leaders believers in yourself and mean it i mean you only get one shot take it or leave it im not throwin away my shot i said im not throwin away my shot yo im just like my country im young scrappy and hungry and im not throwin away my shot i said im not throwin away my shot no im not throwin away my shot im just like my country im young scrappy and hungry and im not throwin away my shot its time to rise up when you livin on your knees you rise up tell your brother that we gotta rise up tell your sister that shes gotta rise up when are folks like me and you gonna rise up every city every hood we need to rise up all my soldiers whats good we need to rise up we aint got no other choice we need to rise up rise up throughout my travels and journeys through life ive been searchin and been learnin to be the type of person to display how determined the type to feel that fire thats burnin like a knife that is turnin i fight while im hurtin sometimes theyre right cause life is a burden like the pain from a bite thatll worsen tryna stifle the light thatll shine on me first and before i ride in a hearse and my breathing stops and youll never take my one shot i got fore i lie in the earth and now i come again on that hamilton Hercules Mulligan readin in vanity fair or the huffington done with the sufferin we in the guts again family rushin in wonder where busta been feelin the hunger and feedin the lust to win see ive been patiently waitin for this moment to rise up again thats the way i was molded and as the last one standin as the rest of them foldin give me my one chance to grab the torch and properly hold it im not throwin away my shot im not throwin away my shot im just like my country im young scrappy and hungry and im not throwin away my shot im not throwin away my shot no im not throwin away my shot im just like my country im young scrappy and hungry and im not throwin away my shot its time to take a shot [ cheers and applause ] jimmy oh thats what im talking about the roots, busta rhymes, joell ortiz. [ cheers and applause ] the hamilton mixtape is out now well be right back, everybody. Stick around [ cheers and applause ] p is for permission to indulge. O is for out of this world. L is for loving the seasonal cuisine. A is for access to everything, including the aisle. R is for reclining in tailormade bedding. And i. Must be dreaming. S. So long, jet lag. Polaris, from united. [ cheers and applause ] jimmy my thanks to Annette Bening, steve harvey, greta gerwig, busta busta busta rhymes, joell ortiz, and the roots, everybody [ cheers and applause ] stay tuned for late night with seth meyers. Thank you for watching. Have a great night. I hope to see you tomorrow, byebye. Thank you. [ cheers and applause ] announcer from 30 Rockefeller Plaza in new york, its late night with seth meyers. Tonight kate mckinnon, from star actor benjamin bratt, music from the hold steady, featuring the 8g band with ace cunningham. [ cheers and applause ] ladies and gentlemen, seth meyers. [ cheers and applause ] seth good evening, im seth meyers, this is late night. How is everybody doing tonight . [ cheers and applause ] fantastic. Fantastic to hear. In that case lets get to the news. Donald trump began his post election victory tour last week. Meanwhile, Hillary Clinton has wandered so far into the woods she found the blair witch. [ light laughter ]
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