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[ light laughter ] dude, you made barack obama show two birth certificates, and you called the pope disgraceful. [ light laughter ] but youre gonna reserve judgment on this guy who looks like the tow truck driver from a horror movie . [ light laughter ] need a ride ladies . [ applause ] youre not gonna get cell service out here. [ light laughter ] authorities were called to a florida airport yesterday to deal with angry passengers after Spirit Airlines canceled multiple flights. Just look at this. [ shouting ] [ bleep ] seth man, the only time ive seen people that mad is when a Spirit Airlines flight wasnt canceled. [ light laughter ] what, i have to get on it . Queen elizabeth was spotted driving herself home from church yesterday in a jaguar. Jaguar, all i see is a cougar. [ laughter and applause ] your way, my way girl. A toyota recently set a record for worlds fastest suv after going 230 miles per hour. It was driven by a mom who forgot her kid at soccer practice. [ light laughter ] a new study shows that most people plan to retire sometime after they turn 65. I said, a new study shows that most people plan to retire [ cheers and applause ] when they turn 65. [ applause ] you could golf more if it was possible. On this day in 1960, the fda approved the worlds first commercially produced Birth Control pill. And on this day in 1961 the first couple learned what 99. 9 effective means. [ light laughter ] and finally, a twitter plea from a teen for a year of free wendys Chicken Nuggets is now the most retweeted post of all time. Followed by the time Justin Bieber accidentally tweeted out the number three. Ladies and gentlemen we have a great show for you tonight. [ cheers and applause ] he is nominated for a tony for his role as gregory solomon in Arthur Millers the price. Danny devito, one of our favorites back on the show tonight. She is the star of a fantastic new amazon series i love dick. That is the title of the show. Her name is kathryn hahn, shes our friend. Shes back. [ cheers and applause ] also, she is the president and ceo of planned parenthood. I cant wait to talk to her about everything thats going on. Cecile richards joins us tonight. [ cheers and applause ] before we get to all that, on friday, a jury convicted a woman of Disorderly Conduct for being disruptive during attorney general Jeff Sessions recent confirmation hearing. She laughed, got kicked out, and loudly protested. So, while she didnt get arrested for laughing, it did help her get to the point where she got kicked out. So to help make sure this doesnt happen to you, please welcome one of our writers amber ruffin with a segment called how not to laugh at Jeff Sessions. [ cheers and applause ] greetings everbody. Now, usually i want to come out here and have fun, but now is not the time for games. It is the time for very important steps that will keep you out of jail. Okay . Okay. Protester Desiree Fairooz was arrested. And i thought, this is crazy . Theyd arrest a white woman . [ light laughter ] and also, theres a white woman named desiree . [ light laughter ] now i dont want this to happen to you so for your own safety heres how not to laugh at Jeff Sessions. Number one when you find out his full name is Jefferson Beauregard sessions, dont imagine someone saying it like this Jefferson Beauregard sessions. Cause that could get you giggling and the next thing you know, youre in jail. [ light laughter ] and certainly dont add extra words like Jefferson Beauregard sessions, get your hand out of that cookie jar. [ laughter ] i know its fun but dont do that. For your own safety. Now number two do not let his appearance get to you. Even though he looks like a mike pence shrinky dink. [ light laughter ] stay cool. Even though he looks like you put an old mans face and faceapp and press baby. [ light laughter ] do not think to yourself that he looks like a garbage pale kid named plantation nation. [ laughter ] or you will not be able to keep it together and now if you are anything like me, when you hear his name, you want to put it in a parody of the song confessions by usher like this these are my Jeff Sessions just then i thought put all are good dont do that. Okay. Another great way not to laugh at Jeff Sessions is to think about how horribly racist he is. In 1986, a Senate Committee denied sessions a federal judgeship because he was deemed too racist. You know how racist you had to be to be considered too racist in the 80s . [ light laughter ] they were so racist, we havent even unpacked it all yet. People still have yet to get mad about walk like an egyptian. And you know thats coming. [ light laughter ] just think about all those broke racist games and you will be fine. But you will not be fine, if you think, Jefferson Beauregard sessions, stop slurping mint juleps. [ light laughter ] do not think that. Even though he looks like he could grant wishes, be careful cause he cannot. Unless your wishes to have threefifths of a vote. [ audience ohs ] these are my Jeff Sessions just when i thought i said i like [ cheers and applause ] really, you should not laugh at Jeff Sessions. He cannot take the teasing. If you want to laugh at someone, laugh at this guy. He loves it. This has been, how not to laugh at Jeff Sessions. [ cheers and applause ] seth give it up for amber ruffin everybody. You know, um im in my 40s now. Im married, i have a kid and nothing, nothing makes me feel older than when i dont know the new slang terms that teenagers are using. And it seems like these days teen slang terms are evolving so fast, that sometimes its hard to keep up. So i went out, i did some research. I talked to some real teens. And they filled me in. And so i want to do you the favor of passing on to you in our segment seth explains teen slang. [ applause ] seth our first new teen slang term that actual teens are using is algebra. Lets see what it means. A bra that is extremely difficult to solve. [ light laughter ] here it is in a sentence. I was fooling around with jenny, i was about to make it to second base. But, her algebra was so complicated, i had to use the quadratic equation to get it off. [ laughter and applause ] our next routine slang term is united passenger, lets see what it means. [ audience oohs ] its the drunk kid who gets dragged out of prom. [ laughter ] here it is in a sentence. Mike got so drunk, he ditched his prom date to grind on a water cooler. And the next thing you know, two large men were dragging him out of the door with his belly exposed. Unitedpassenger. [ laughter and applause ] moving on you all probably know Patrick Dempsey. Patrick dempsey the ageless, hunky mcdreamy from greys anatomy. And hes huge with teens. [ light laughter ] very popular with teens. So popular, that teens have come up with a new slang term based on how ageless Patrick Dempsey is. Its patrick hempsey. Lets see the definition. Its weed thats 51yearsold, but still looks fantastic. [ light laughter ] for example, found some kush from 66 in one of my grandmas old boxes. But i got to say, that grass didnt look a day over 40, patrickhempsey. [ applause ] up next we have gastronaut. This is a noun used to describe someone who goes really far away to pass gas. [ laughter ] for example, i think ian has stomach problems, because every 15 minutes he floats away from the group, gastronaut. [ laughter and applause ] up next, we have rasputin. This is the guy at the party who you cant believe hasnt passed out yet. [ light laughter ] for example, thought greg was a goner after he took 22 tequila shots and chugged that bottle of shampoo but that rasputin is still tearing up the dance floor. [ light laughter ] moving on, this next slang term is hyper specific. I cannot stress how specific it is, but i also cannot stress how happy you will be to know it if the situation should arise in your life. And here it is, the word is squakward. And heres what it means. Its an adjective used when your pet parrot says your exgirlfriends name while current girlfriend is over. [ light laughter ] for example. Hey, julia, check out my parrot roscoe. Bwak take it off, susan well, this is squawkward. [ laughter and applause ] when i was a teen, we didnt have that. You had to say this is awkward, that my parrot did that. This saved so much time. [ light laughter ] next up its kentucky doobie, lets see the definition. When you get so high, you cant remember how to walk, so you have to ride on your friends back like a jockey. [ light laughter ] for example, i smoked so much of grandmas patrick hempsey last night, that i hopped on big mikes back and he galloped all the way to my house and i fed him some apples. Kentuckydoobie. [ applause ] moving on, kids teens, teens huge fans of msnbc. Our next term is morning joe. This is when two teachers announce theyre a couple even though everyone has already known for years. [ light laughter ] here it is in a sentence. Mr. Collins and ms. Arnold finally morning joed their relationship today even though everyone knows theyve been boinking in the teachers lounge since the reagan administration. [ laughter and applause ] up next is, fast and furious. This is someone who is very dumb but makes a lot of money. Here it is in a sentence. Tyler is dumber than a bag of roast beef, but that boy rakes in the cash getting makeup tested on his face. Fast and furious. And finally, our last teen slang term is, frisbeef, what does it mean . Well, its when two ultimate frisbee teams hate each other. For example, it started out so innocent just a game between friends, but after the first quarter, it turned into something else, something sinister. Suddenly, there were no rules, no laws, no moral compass. It was kill or be killed. When all was said and done, and the field ran red with the blood of good men, i knelt down next to the fallen brother and looked up to the heavens, when god . When will this frisbeef end . [ laughter and applause ] that was seth explains teen slang. Well be right back with danny devito everybody. [ cheers and applause ] out out get get get grrr did you find everything okay, sir . Whaaaaat . With motionsense technology. Degree has redefined deodorant so that i can redefine. Power. Footwork. Range. The more i move, the more it works. Degree. It wont let you down. Beggin skinny strips or beggin black label . Theres two . what a delicious dilemma beggin strips premium edition. Twwwoooooo . . with real meat as ingredient one. Everything to your liking . Mmm mmmmm. Beggin strips premium. Becaussssseeee beggin im on the phone towel please while other Insurance Companies just see a house. We see the home youve worked really hard for. So why not give it the protection it deserves. Dude. Yodude. Unchings stheyre just jealous. Kelloggs raisin bran crunch with crunchy clusters and the taste of apples and strawberries. I got one guess were having cereal for dinner. Kelloggs raisin bran crunch apple strawberry. Seth welcome back everybody. Please give it up for the 8g band, right over there. [ cheers and applause ] also, back with us tonight on drums, hes played with some of the biggest names in music like Meghan Trainor and bryson tiller, and he was with us for our week of shows in washington, d. C. Last year. Thaddeus dixon, everybody [ cheers and applause ] so great to have you back with us, thaddeus. Thanks so much. Seth my first guest tonight is an emmyaward winning actor you know from t. V. Shows like taxi, and its always sunny in philadelphia, he was just nominated for a tony award, for his role in Arthur Millers the price, now on broadway through may 14th. Please welcome back to the show, the very talented, danny devito, everybody. [ cheers and applause ] seth welcome back hey, baby seth im so happy to see you. Hows it going, seth. Seth its good and congratulations. Aw, thank you. Seth tony nominated. Tony. Seth this is your first broadway show. And he gets a tony nomination. Seth yeah. [ cheers and applause ] nice, yeah yeah. Its very, very, very exciting. Seth for your first time, do you think this spoils your second time now . I dont know, what do you think . Seth i dont know, i feel like youre gonna say im a high expectation . Seth yeah, im a lock for a tony now. I dont know. Seth have you ever been to the tonys . Never been to the tonys. Seth i think its a wonderful awards show. Youve been to the tonys . Seth i havent. But, i like watching it because they do songs from the show. Oh yeah, cause people get up and do musical acts, stuff like that. Seth its fun, because at the oscars, the oscars, they just show clips. Yeah, but you got the people right there. Seth they get the performance. Yeah, the performers are up there doing it. I have seen that. Its really good. Seth and i want to ask this, cause you famously went to the oscars in 2001, and you brought, you had carrots with you. Oh i had carrots and celery. [ light laughter ] seth yeah, and you were just eating. Well, the thing about it is you go and watch the oscars, the oscars long. Seth its long. You know what i mean, youre up there. Youre in the middle of the thing. We were nominated for erin brockovich. Erin brockovich, the movie. [ cheers and applause ] seth yeah, its excellent. Yeah, so in midway, when i was leaving, i was drinking before i went, so you know, i didnt eat. [ light laughter ] on my way out, i grabbed a handful of carrots and celery and stuck them in the tuxedo, right . Seth loose or in a ziplock bag . Not my tuxedo. It was a rentatuxedo. No they were loose. Seth okay. [ light laughter ] yeah, and really seriously, and sure enough in the middle of the show, i was starving. Seth yeah. I mean i was really hungry. I didnt want to move. So i just whipped them out and started eating them. And theyre not the most silent food you could bring. [ light laughter ] its not like bringing a piece of bread. You know what i mean . Its crunching, like i think steve martin was hosting, and he brought me dip. [ laughter ] that was cool. It was kind of i am very much honored and looking forward to going to the tonys. Its gonna be a lot of fun. Seth you get to eat a hard boiled egg every night in this show, so you dont have to bring anything . No, i wont bring seth your character actually eats food. I could bring a hard boiled egg, you know, frank on sunny always operates with a hardboiled egg. [ cheers and applause ] i always have a hardboiled egg in my pocket. Its a good thing, its a very nutritious thing to have. And you can always whip it out, and crack it anywhere you want. Seth and you get to but now you are eating an egg, but you are acting. You are now a character eating an egg. Yeah. Seth and mark ruffalo, your incredibly talented costar in this play. Absolutely. Seth you have spit youve accidentally spit egg on him the thing about it, its a scene where were having an argument that i take out an egg, and he says, whats this now . Lunch . And i say, you gave me such an argument, i got hungry. So, i eat the egg and i actually eat the egg on stage and depending on how the scene went before, like if i feel like he was good to me [ light laughter ] ill leave him alone a little bit. But if he pissed me off a little bit, i start spitting at him. [ light laughter ] i mean, yolk, white, everythings going on him. A couple nights it was really, really messy. And if youre gonna come to see the show, its only playing until sunday. Probably best thing not to sit in the first couple rows. [ light laughter ] do they give you ponchos, like seaworld to keep the egg off you . Its really interesting to see that, because its all lit like this, you dont see the audience basically. Its a lot of backlight, and its a lot of like so when i spit the egg out, i can actually see all the yellow, the color, and everything is so beautiful as it arcs through the air. [ light laughter ] seth yeah. Its funny, yeah, cause you never see eggs welllit. And thats like yeah seth you really dont. Right, its like so seth have you had to adjust like, such a serious actor, i mean like, you know. Seth have you adjusted your diet at all to the fact that youre eating an extra egg a day. I used to have an omelet in the morning, but, now its eight a week, its like really bad. Im worried about the cholesterol. [ light laughter ] seth yeah. Everything like that. You gotta be really careful. Seth and people say actors dont take risks. You are out there eating an egg every night. Are you kidding me . I am a man on a limb every night with an egg in my mouth. [ light laughter ] crazy. Seth this is an Arthur Miller play. What does that feel like . Well thats the gift right there. Arthur millers a brilliant, brilliant playwright. Everything, by the way, in the play, i play a 90yearold, yiddish furniture dealer. And i got the accent, and i do the whole thing, i got the voice. And im like, its so much fun to do. But every single thing, when people say to me, like you know, i saw the show and you did the egg. You did this, and you did that. Everything is written. Arthur miller wrote it all. He was like a big fan of like yiddish theater, you know, the borcht belt, and all this kind of stuff. And its just amazing. And im with tony shalhoub, who is like, wonderful actor. You know. [ applause ] mark ruffalo and jessica hecht, and its just like a gift to be on stage with those four people, three people. Im the fourth person. Seth yeah. [ light laughter ] im not very good at math. Seth i now ive heard that you, in order to warm up for this show, and again, this is surprising to me, because you are playing as you mentioned a 90yearold yiddish man. Yeah and tonight im doing it. Seth yeah. Yeah. Serious. Seth well you dont have to selfpromote. You already got the tony nomination. [ light laughter ] seth but you warm up, which does not strike as how a 90yearold would get ready for a show, but you warm up on a trampoline. Yes. Yeah i got a trampoline, a little trampoline, i got it online. Its really cool. It doesnt take up a lot of space. Seth expensive . How much . 27 bucks. Seth okay, great. [ light laughter ] delivered. Seth oh, wow. It just folds up, unfolds. You put it up. And i, what i do is i go early to the show and i start jumping a little bit, you know, a little bit. Then i get some makeup put on, i jump. Put some clothes on and start. [ light laughter ] seth okay, so now thats weird, because now i have to go back to the first two times, and realize you were naked . I was naked. Seth you were naked with no makeup. Naked with makeup. Exactly. Seth then your clothes. Then i put the clothes on and gradually i wind up in the costume, on the trampoline with a overcoat, jacket. Its a wool suit, a hat, a cane, everything. Its like the whole nine yards and im bouncing. I should take a picture of that. Seth why wouldnt you . [ light laughter ] oh i will, i will. Ill send you seth okay, good, do you listen to music on your trampoline . I do, i listen to like a lot of like im into, you know, like it goes varies, like last night, it was a lot of frankie lymon. Seth okay. You know, why do fools fall in love. Seth sure, that does it again. Yeah, and then all kinds of like, real cool, upbeat stuff that you can bounce on the trampoline. Seth yeah. You dont want to listen to adele on a trampoline. Nah. You dont want to float away on a trampoline. [ light laughter ] seth yeah. And president obama and malia came to the show . Thats right. Seth was that exciting . They came to a preview. And it was really exciting. I didnt know they were going to be there. And she is a bring fan of its always sunny. Seth right. I mean, he wouldnt have come to see me. [ light laughter ] but she seth look, you only have to get one of them. Yeah. She was great. They were great. They had a great time. I have these little nut balls that i eat. Theyre uh [ light laughter ] seth you only eat, it sounds like you only eat things that are round. [ light laughter ] seth so you have nut balls i have these little nut balls that are like spirulina, and uh, kinda healthy stuff. Seth healthy, yeah. And i, at the break, in the intermission, i went and gave them a couple nut balls. [ light laughter ] seth oh, really. Yeah. They were hiding in a, like a dressing room near mine. You know, it was so Many Secret Service people there. You know, the whole nine yards. So i brought two nut balls in. She cant eat em because shes allergic to nuts. Seth so he got an extra one. I gave him both balls. Seth yeah. [ laughter and applause ] i feel like thats something you can only do once someone leaves office. Yeah, no thats true. Seth and im also very excited. Youre doing a show with Jeff Goldblum on amazon, and another great actor. You guys have never worked together . No we never worked together. And hes like, hes very tall. Seth hes very tall. No, so its very difficult to do a twoshot. The idea is were gonna work it out, see how it goes. Seth so this is a real cinematographers challenge . It will really challenge, yeah. Cameras are up there, and down here. [ light laughter ] seth well its always a pleasure to see you. Its great to be here. [ cheers and applause ] seth congratulations again. Danny devito, everybody, well be right back with kathryn hahn. 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Keep it tyson. Always fun, yeah. Beatbox vocals playing we, the people, are tired of being surprised with extra monthly fees. We want hd. And every box and dvr. All included. Because we dont like surprises. Yes. Like changing up the celebrity at the end to someone more handsome. And talented. Really . And british. Switch from cable to directv. Get 4 rooms with hd, dvr and every box included for 25 a month. Only from directv. [ cheers and applause ] seth our next guest is a fantastic actress you know from movies like bad moms and step brothers and shows like transparent. She stars in a new series i love dick which is available on Amazon Prime Video starting may 12th. Lets take a look. I love that you just go by dick because usually someone if one is born a richard, they were rich, rick, richie, ricky. Theres so many just dick. [ light laughter ] is it possible that i saw you on a horse yesterday . Yeah, the ranch just outside of town. How big . You want to know how big my ranch is . [ laughter ] seth please welcome back to the show, my friend kathryn hahn, everybody. [ cheers and applause ] seth welcome back. Hi, thank you for having me. Seth i am so happy to have you back. Your show is fantastic. Its so different. And from the clip, kevin bacon plays dick. You are obsessed with him. Yes. Seth therefore the title of the show, i love dick. I love dick. Exactly. Just something i would could be proud of calling my parents to tell them i got a new gig. Seth were you [ light laughter ] were you surprised that the title because this was based on its based on a book. Yes. By our writer chris kraus. We were shocked that amazon that we kept waiting for the phone call for amazon to be like, you guys. The title. Seth what about new friends . Yes, exactly. I love richard. Seth yeah. Right. Exactly. But no, now we cant. Were just giggling when we see, like, billboards all over town. I cant believe we got away with this. Its kind of amazing. Seth you have [ light laughter ] you have a seven and a tenyearold. Is it weird . Do they obviously theyre aware of what you do for a living. Yes. Seth in the show how has that been . You know, it is strange when your tenyearold very casual just asks you what youre working on. Hell just be like, what are you working on tonight, mom . Dick . And im just like [ light laughter ] no, how do i deal with it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It is a little bit but in a its actually surprisingly easy to say once you keep saying it for a while. First we would just casually refer to it as ild. Seth uhhuh. That was like our code when i would go to, like, check in at the gate. And so theyd be like, so what are you here for . Ild . Ild, ild, ild. And then by the end, i was like, i love dick. Like really out loud. It feels actually really good to say. Seth yeah, i agree. Ive enjoyed it, and its only been a day for me. Keep saying it. [ light laughter ] seth thank you. Then but like, you obviously youre out doing press. It must be strange to have a show that im imagine everybody like i am doing right now. Its surely a salacious title. Yes. For sure. That is definitely an opener. You know, doing even like shock jock radio, to us, has been interesting. Just to hear these dudes getting a little flustered. Which always just makes me giggle. Yeah, its an amazing, amazing book. Seth you were on the today show and they none of them would say it. They were not allowed to say it, i guess. Because they were afraid it was going to be turned into something called a meme. Seth oh, right. [ light laughter ] sure. If you only i will be honest. You only have to say i love dick once on camera. I realize its too late for me. But then [ laughter ] then its like a thing. That is a thing. Seth and memes are the thing memes dont have is context. So you just see us summoning, like, i love dick. Seth yeah. Okay. Yeah. Seth in a vacuum and then your in a vacuum. Seth youre mind decides on its own. Yeah. Seth so this show its based on a book. Youre obsessed with kevin bacon. Yes. Seth but, tell us a little bit more about it. I would say its like a kind of a sexy love triangle between kevin bacon, who plays our dick. Griffin dunne, who plays my husband. Hes phenomenal. And myself, i play griffin and i are married. We i kind of have always been, im like a flailing film maker. Im a little bit of a mess. Never could get my feet under me. We i end up taking him to this fictional Art Institute in marfa texas where he has a residency and thats where i fall madly head over heals in love. I think obsessive love with this man dick, and i wrote him a series of letters. Like thousands and thousands of letters. That, of course, at first never had any intention of sending, but then realized its actually the best art that shes ever made. So it becomes this really kind of desire, art, like its a pretty its a really intense show. Seth the First Episode is fantastic. I cant wait to see more. And there is you are not lying when you say its very intense. [ light laughter ] yes is it. It is. Seth because its only a half an hour. And i feel like jill soloway, who created this show and created transparent. Yes. Seth theyre very similar in that theyre half hours, theyre very funny. But theyre also very real and you kind of feel like youve watched an hour of television when its over because theres so much has happened, emotionally. And again, like it is, because it is there is something really thrilling about something that has such a salacious title and underneath it, its based on this kind of Pretty Amazing feminist cult book from the 90s, that has kind of dog eared and passed from woman to woman over the years. So its pretty its a Pretty Amazing launching pad for material and theres some amazing performers in it. And marfa texas is like, mwah. Incredible. Seth yeah, ive heard amazing things. Yeah, its beautiful. Seth i think i know one person, maybe. [ light laughter ] its a long way from home. Seth you went to sundance with this show and i want to ask, there is a paparazzi photo, but i wanted to ask you about, that there is more to this story. Before i show the photo. This is this is really good for my ego. This is i think i had this is what my single paparazzi experience. Paparazzi, when you come when you go to sundance and you go down to get your luggage, like theres huge i guess sometimes photographers there. And i had one lone guy who took some pictures. It was fair to say, i walked over to get my bags at the carousal. And he wandered over to me. Hes like, listen, i wouldnt do this, but i like you. And i thought you might want to just look these over. Probably because they were so bad. That he let me he let me delete them. And i was like, oh my god. And then this is what he this is the redo guys. Seth so this he let you its not great. Seth he let your he let you stage your own paparazzi. This is how i staged my paparazzi. Seth he said, lets get one youre happy with . And you guys both looked at it and said, yep. Were done. This is so unnatural. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] in my, like, snow boots. Seth yeah. Look at that, so shes ready for sundown. Look at that pained face. Im so dehydrated already. Seth yeah. Like just waiting for luggage, its so staged. [ laughter ] oh, shes like, stop. So sad. Seth look at all the people in the back who are just star struck to see you. [ laughter ] oh yeah, they couldnt even look me in the eye. Seth yeah, they were just like, oh pretend pretend we lost luggage. I dont want her to see us. Like looking directly into the sun. [ light laughter ] seth kathryn, its always great to see you. Kathryn hahn. [ cheers and applause ] thank you. Seth all episodes of i love dick will be available may 12th on Amazon Prime Video. Well be right back with more late night. [ cheers and applause ] whats that . P3 planters nuts, jerky and seeds. I like a variety in my protein. Totally, thats why i have this uh trail mix. Wow minty. P3 snacks. The more interesting way to get your protein. engine revving screams man woo hoo join in on the fun and cash in on the deals at the chevy 4th of july sales event. Man this is a fast car. Man 2 oh, boy enjoy the ride while making no Monthly Payments for the rest of the summer on these exciting chevy vehicles. Or, for a limited time, get 0 financing for 72 months on these 2017 models. Or get 20 below msrp on 2017 impala premier and sonic lt. Find new roads at the chevy 4th of july sales event. On 2017 impala premier and sonic lt. You get to do the dishes. Ed. Bring em on. Dawn ultra has 3 times more greasecleaning power. A drop of dawn and grease is gone. Seth welcome back, everybody. Now, here at late night we have a lot of expenses, and to cover the costs of those expenses, we take on sponsors, some of them are great. And were very happy to have them. Some of them, though, are terrible sponsors, of terrible products. Were not proud of them. Im ashamed we took their money, but because we did, we now have to mention these products on the air. So id like to apologize in advance. But late night is brought to you by cat coffee [ light laughter ] tired of your cat just lounging around the house . Perk up that puss with cat coffee. [ light laughter ] now with twice the catfeine. Cat coffee, its the coffee that will make your cat say meowza [ light laughter ] we are also sponsored by, funeral wet wipes. [ light laughter ] didnt know the deceased well enough to cry, but still want to look sad . [ light laughter ] wipe those dry eyes with funeral wet wipes [ light laughter ] now thats believable bereavement [ light laughter ] we are also brought to you by, urinal journals. [ light laughter ] dont like to make small talk while peeing . 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Is it still paint . Aura interior from benjamin moo®e. Only available at independently owned paint and hardware stores. [ intense music playing ] ] its here, but its going by fast. The opportunity of the year is back the mercedesbenz summer event. Get to your dealer today for incredible onceaseason offers, and start firing up those grilles. Lease the e300 for 569 a month at your local mercedesbenz dealer. Mercedesbenz. The best or nothing. [ cheers and applause ] seth our next guest has been the president of planned Parenthood Federation of america since 2006. Please welcome to the show Cecile Richards, everybody. [ cheers and applause ] seth welcome to the show. Its great to be here. Seth im very honored that youre here. I want to congratulate you on a birthday, planned parenthood just turned 100yearsold. Exactly. Seth in october, thats incredible. [ cheers and applause ] its good. Seth and 100 seems to be a number were hearing a lot. We just got through 100 days of the trump administration. 100 days of what many are calling the resistance. How do you feel being, safe to say, more Team Resistance than the other. How do you feel its going . So, i think we have more in 100 years than theyve done in 100 days, ill say that. And [ cheers and applause ] but it actually it feels great. We started out with one Little Clinic in brooklyn, new york and now we have hundreds of Health Centers. One in five women in this country have been to planned parenthood. And frankly because of some of the, i think, attacks on us, weve actually never been more popular in the United States of america. Seth you were at [ cheers and applause ] i think theres a lot to be said to that. You were at the womens march the day after the inauguration. Yes. Seth how do you feel as though the energy youre seeing here, i mean, has obviously, must feel very positive to you. Do you feel as though it can be harnessed for actually change . Absolutely. And it was amazing to be in washington. I think but a thing that was amazing to me was not only that washington there were thousands and thousands of people, but there were 10,000 people in Salt Lake City utah. And there were people marching in fairbanks alaska in a snowstorm. There were folks in antarctica marching. They were in every single every single continent. To me, that shows that this is a Resistance Movement that is broad and deep. Thats everywhere and women are leading it. And that is really exciting. I think about, you know, the one in five women in this country that have been to planned parenthood, i feel like they are on the front lines now protecting Womens Health and rights. Seth so you talk about one in five women and obviously those who have a story to tell about their experiences with planned parenthood. Right now this bill went from the house to the senate. There are 13 senators who are crafting their version of it. They are all male. I noticed that. [ light laughter ] seth youre paid to. Youre very how do you feel, how egregious is it to not have women also sort of talking about the how this bill is affecting Womens Health . Well i i mean i definitely feel like if more members of congress and the senate could get pregnant we wouldnt be fighting about planned parenthood and about Birth Control. [ cheers and applause ] so that would help. And i think because this particular bill is so harmful to women, theres an extra special duty to make sure that women are represented in these conversations and in the final you know in the final final bill. Seth you were saying you saw mike pence was having a meeting with all men talking about talking about health care. And you were saying that you wished you could have gone and taken a photo of it just to show people how insane it looks to just have men talking about it. Right. Seth but then he tweeted it. I thought that was really good of him. Yes, actually. Seth so this is you have it right there. Seth yeah he thought this was a good look for talking about health care. That is [ light laughter ] and then a very funny guy named Justin Shanes tweeted this photo and said that its about basically right after and said it was like dogs [ laughter ] talking about cats health care. [ light laughter ] do think thats accurate . [ applause ] i think its got a point of and im not i actually think maybe i would rather have golden retrievers determining the next Health Care Bill than the congress. Actually, not a bad look. But the thing thats important about that photograph, im sure im glad you showed that is because that was actually the Freedom Caucus that went to the white house to determine all the final details of this bill. And the main thing that they negotiated was to get ride of maternity benefits for women in america. Thats how dangerous it is. And so whats frustrating, because this bill also, of course, ends access to Birth Control at planned parenthood for millions of patients. So i feel like this congress is trying to make it harder for women to prevent an unintended pregnancy and a lot harder to have a healthy pregnancy. Seth well this is you know obviously, you know planned parenthood and abortion are not separated in our discourse in anyway, shape or form. You know and its a very emotional issue and people have sort of married the two. But i think its important to say that this is this healthcare bill for the people who are choosing to have children, for the women who are the making the choice to go through their pregnancy, this does them no favors at all. Is that safe to say . Actually no. In fact, its much worse. Because of course, this bill that supposedly defunds planned parenthood, but were not in a federal budget. It basically just blocks folks from coming to planned parenthood. Has nothing to do with abortion because federal funds do not pay for abortion. So what its actually doing is saying to women you cant go to planned parenthood anymore for cancer screenings, for Birth Control. I was actually just in speaker ryans own district. We have three Health Centers there. These women are saying how in the world am i gonna ever to get my annual exam if i cant go to planned parenthood anymore. Seth you mentioned there are three in his district. There are so many places it seems now in this country where there are no places for women to go. And it doesnt seem like this is a great concern to the federal government. I hope that they really think about this. And thats why im so proud of the women all across the country who are not only marching, but they are calling congress and they are going to town Hall Meetings and telling those stories. Because again, this bill would do so many things to cut off coverage for women. And i know in my home state of texas when they tried the same kind of thing, weve actually seen not only dozens of Womens Health centers shut down, but a doubling of the Maternal Mortality rate in the 21st century. Its really unbelievable and its unconscionable. Seth so moving forward, what would you say to people that have sort of been emboldened by this you know this protest movement, this voicing the way they feel about whats happening now . What are the steps for them to take . Is it to continue to protest . Is it to donate . What would you ask of them . I would say definitely, you know marching is good. Going to town Hall Meetings is good. Calling congress is incredibly good. Weve shut down women have shut down the congressional switch board, i dont know many times. And then also, im supposed to say, you can text defend to 22422. I was afraid i couldnt remember the numbers. But, and if you do that, then actually it will connect you at planned parenthood and tell you everything thats going on every day. And its look thats what gonna change the direction of this country and thats whats going to influence congress and this white house is people taking action. Seth well, you know, i do think the one thing that always surprises me, because i understand, again, that abortion is this very emotional issue and i understand and i respect that certain people have a different opinion of it than me. But it seems like Womens Health, at its core, is something that both sides the aisle should agree on. And thank you so much for fighting that fight for them. Absolutely. Its an honor. Yeah, thank you. [ cheers and applause ] seth Cecile Richards everybody. You can check out our extended conversation on the late Night Podcast tomorrow. Well be right back. [ cheers and applause ] do you really use head shoulders . No, not really. I knew that not the one you think you know the tri action formula cleans removing up to 100 of flakes protects and even moisturizes for Sofia Vergara hair [ cheers and applause ] seth my thanks to danny devito, katheryn hahn, Cecile Richards, everybody. [ cheers and applause ] thaddeus dixon, 8g band. Stay tuned for carson daly. See you tomorrow

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