Transcripts For KNTV Late Night With Seth Meyers 20170110 :

Transcripts For KNTV Late Night With Seth Meyers 20170110



of american drama was criticized by meryl streep. [ laughter ] [ applause ] senate majority leader mitch mcconnell said yesterday republicans will begin repealing obamacare by the end of the week. but don't worry, he's not taking away your health care, he's just storing it in his cheeks for the winter. [ laughter and applause ] the movie "la la land" won a record seven golden globes last night. the movie tells the story of a struggling jazz musician named sebastian who against all odds is white. [ light laughter ] a new poll shows that 55% of americans are confident that donald trump will defend u.s. interests abroad. but an internet poll shows that 100% of americans are confident that -- [ russian accent ] comrade trump will be great success for glorious u.s. and also a. [ applause ] u.s. and a. trump advisor kellyanne conway said today that the media should not focus on what donald trump says and instead report on what is in his heart. although, really, how much is there to report about chicken grease? [ light laughter ] first lady michelle obama gave her final white house speech on friday where she told young people to, quote, "never fear." thought it was weird that she told old people to, quote, "watch your backs." [ laughter ] "you are not safe. watch your backs." more than 60 cities around the world celebrated the 16th annual no-pants subway ride yesterday. or as that one guy on your train calls it -- sunday. [ light laughter ] a woman at a hospital in detroit last week wore an electronic chewbacca mask while giving birth. "and while getting pregnant," said her husband, who's weird. [ laughter ] a man is claiming that his struggle with sleep apnea caused him to grope a woman's breasts on a flight. said the woman, "nice try, mr. president-elect." [ laughter and applause ] "it's a condition. it's a medical condition." [ light laughter ] on this day in 1493, christopher columbus famously mistook three manatees for mermaids, describing them as "not half as beautiful as they are painted." even weirder, he added, "but twice as good in the sack." [ light laughter ] you're not wrong. [ light laughter ] and finally, today was the ten year anniversary of the iphone. which makes tomorrow the ten year anniversary of your second iphone. [ laughter and applause ] ladies and gentlemen, we have a fantastic show for you tonight. he's in the new movies "the book of love." he's one of our dear friends. jason sudeikis is on the show tonight. [cheers and applause] she's one of the stars of hulu's "the path", now in its second season. michelle monaghan is joining us tonight. [ cheers and applause ] and he has a fantastic special called "the messy truth", it's back on cnn. van jones is joining us tonight. [ cheers and applause ] a very interesting guy that i'm looking forward to talking to. before we get to all that, the transition to donald trump's presidency has been just as chaotic in the first week of 2017 as it was before the new year. from the ongoing dispute over russian hacking to the gop's attempt to ram through cabinet appointments without fully vetting them. also, tweets. for more on this, it's time for "a closer look." ♪ [ applause ] >> seth: presidential transitions are a time to project an image of calm and stability by, for example, holding regular press conferences, or giving interviews. instead, trump has continued he habit of tweeting obsessively about some of the least important things you could possibly imagine, like the ratings for the all-new "celebrity apprentice." >> that a looks at this. he tweeted, "wow, the ratings are in and arnold schwarzenegger got swamped or destroyed by comparison to the ratings machine djt." referring to himself, clearly. "so much for being a movie star." the president-elect ends the tweet with this, "but who cares? he supported kasich and hillary." >> seth: when you end a tweet with the words "who cares," we all know the answer is you. [ laughter ] you care. and clearly this isn't exactly a carefully thought-out communication strategy, because one of trump's senior advisers and spokespeople, kellyanne conway, found out about the tweets while she was on the air on fox news. >> okay, look at this. >> uh-oh. >> your boss just tweeted again. "wow, the ratings are in and arnold schwarzenegger got swamped or destroyed by comparison to the ratings machine donald j. trump." and then, "so much for..." >> they'll be another one coming up. >> he's typing -- >> yeah, he's typing. well, good for him. [ laughter ] >> seth: "he's typing. good for him." she talks about him like he's a monkey at the state fair. "he's typing! in overalls, no less!" [ applause ] trump's impulsive stream of consciousness tweets might seem embarrassing for an incoming president, but trump is apparently proud of his twitter presence. so proud, that according to the "washington post", he boasts to friends, aides, and journalists alike, about the quality of his writing and claims that people call him "the ernest hemingway of twitter." [ audience ohs ] [ laughter ] though i would say you're just the ernest of twitter. [ applause ] seriously, if ernest hemingway heard you say that, he would kill himself again. [ laughter ] and any hopes that trump would start this week focused on serious issues were shattered when meryl streep -- while not mentioning him by name -- had this to say at the golden globes. >> when the powerful u their position to bully others, we all lose. >> seth: and sure enough, this morning the president-elect responded to streep in a series of tweets, including one that said -- "meryl streep, one of the most overrated actresses in hollywood, doesn't know me but attacked last night at the golden globes." overrated? she's so good, people use her to compliment people in other professions. like lebron james is the meryl streep of basketball. or donald trump is the meryl streep of having thin skin. [ laughter ] now, whether these tweets are calculated distractions or just the ramblings of an unhinged narcissist, it's clear trump would much rather talk about his feud with meryl streep than say the fact that intelligence officials believe russia hacked the democratic national committee and the clinton campaign to help trump win the election. since the election, trump has responded to the findings of the intelligence community by openly mocking them while showering praise on vladimir putin. >> mr. trump tweeted late friday that, quote, "vladimir putin said today about hillary and dems, in my opinion, it is humiliating. one must be able to lose with dignity. so true." >> donald trump tweeted, praising putin, "great move on delay by v. putin. i always knew he was very smart." >> seth: yeah, just so you know, you don't need the "v." [ light laughter ] we know which putin. no one is thinking "dave putin? from putin chevrolet?" [ light laughter ] in fact, rather than criticize russia for allegedly stealing private data and waging a disinformation campaign to interfere with the election, trump and his team have attacked the democrats for getting hacked in the first place. on friday, trump tweeted, "gross negligence by the democratic national committee allowed hacking to take place." so i guess it was gross negligence when trump himself announced in 2013, "my twitter has been seriously hacked. we are looking for the perpetrators." incidentally the best part about that 2013 hack was that all the hackers did was use trump's twitter account to post lil wayne lyrics. [ light laughter ] like this hacked trump tweet -- "these hoes think they classy. well that's the class i'm skippin'." [ laughter ] and you can tell that's not trump, because he didn't say the hoes were overrated. [ light laughter ] and it's important to question trump's word on anything hacking related, since he doesn't seem to have a firm grasp of how the technology works. take this comment from an impromptu press appearance just before the new year, when he said this about the allegations of russian hacking. >> i think we ought to get on with our lives. i think that computers have complicated lives very greatly. the whole, you know, age of computer has made it where nobody knows exactly what's going on. [ light laughter ] >> seth: well, if the age of computer is when don king just stands there and waves a giant american flag, i think trump is right -- nobody knows what's going on. [ laughter ] and then there was this comment on new year's eve when trump claimed the best way to prevent hacking is to just not use computers to send important messages. >> you know, if you have something really important, write it out and have it delivered by courier, the old-fashioned way. because i'll tell you what, no computer is safe. i don't care what they say. no computer is safe. i have a boy who's 10 years old, he can do anything with a computer. you want something to really go without detection, write it out and have it sent by courier. >> seth: great. or you could just go full lannister and communicate by raven. [ light laughter ] oh, wait, you can't. i just remembered a lannister always pays his debts. [ audience oohs ] [ applause ] so trump has praised vladimir putin and attacked the dnc instead of the russians for the hacking. and on top of that, he and his team have claimed repeatedly that even if russia did supply wikileaks with hacked emails from the dnc and the clinton campaign, it had no effect on the election. like just yesterday when conway said donald trump won because of things having nothing to do with the hacks. that's right. wikileaks had no effect on the election. which is why donald trump never bothered mentioning them on the campaign trail. except for over 100 times. >> as our own team has said -- and wikileaks. wikileaks that just came out. wikileaks just actually came out -- wikileaks is amazing. wikileaks! i love wikileaks. >> seth: wikileaks! [ light laughter ] i love it and i love to say it. wikileaks! [ light laughter ] he's just a boy in love with wikileaks. [ light laughter ] it's only a matter of time before he shows up outside julian assange's window. [ laughter and applause ] the scary thing -- the scary thing about trump's feud with the intelligence community isn't that skepticism is bad. in fact, skepticism of anonymous intelligence claims is essential and healthy. the scary thing is who trump is listening to instead of the intelligence community. take, for example, trump's pick for senior director of strategic communications for the national security council, monica crowley. this weekend, cnn reported that crowley had plagiarized multiple sources in her 2012 book, including the "new york times", wikipedia, and even a website for a podiatrist. [ light laughter ] that's right, trump's pick for director of strategic communications gets her info from a podiatrist's website. although, to be fair, her book was called "pictures of weird feet." [ light laughter ] crowley's appointment is yet another sign that trump may not be surrounding himself with the most competent or ethical people. which is why it's important to review all his cabinet nominees carefully. for example, cabinet appointments normally go through an ethics review process before they have their confirmation hearings. but this year, trump's team is doing things a little differently. >> we are now just days from the start of confirmation hearings in washington for u.s. president-elect donald trump's cabinet nominees. but the office of government ethics says several have still not been properly vetted. >> the problem? the office of government ethics has not received the nominees' financial disclosure information. >> as government ethics watchdogs expressed great concerns about incomplete background checks. "we seem to have lost contact with the trump-pence transition since the election," the ethics chief complains to the president-elect's team. >> seth: lost contact with him? did you try back stage at the miss usa pageant? [ light laughter ] so republicans are trying to ram through trump's cabinet appointments without vetting them first, and that's bad, because we need congress to exercise its oversight over a trump presidency that rife with potential for conflicts of interest and corruption. trump also has a tendency to associate with some shady characters. like at his new year's party at his mar-a-lago club, where he bragged to a crowd of wealthy patrons that he was going to9 cut their taxes and take health insurance away from millions of people. >> all i can tell you is we're going to do a good job. okay? [ cheers ] your taxes are coming down. regulations are coming off. we're going to get rid of obamacare, because -- [ cheers ] >> seth: they cheered the prospect of people losing health insurance like nasa landing a rover on mars. "the eagle has landed, and he does not have health or dental." [ light laughter ] but see that guy on trump's left celebrating? when he says they're going to repeal obamacare, he's not just any old rich guy. according to "the daily news", he's actually a convicted felon with ties to notorious gambino crime family boss, john gotti. and he goes by the nickname, and this is real, "joey no socks." [ laughter ] are you sure that's the kind of guy you want to associate with? i'm talking to you, joey. [ laughter and applause ] this has been "a closer look." ♪ [ applause ] we'll be right back with our friend jason sudeikis, everybody. 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[ cheers and applause ] glad to have you guys here. happy new year. also we have fred armisen with us this week. so -- [ cheers and applause ] delighted to have you here, fred. >> fred: you too. >> seth: everything -- well, also i want to congratulate you, fred. season seven of "portlandia" started last week. [ applause ] >> fred: yeah, we just started. >> seth: amazing. >> fred: yeah, season seven. >> seth: and yet, even with "portlandia" you have time for other projects, which just blows my mind. you're here, you're at "portlandia," and last night were the golden globes. and our friend jimmy fallon hosted, did a fantastic job, i thought. >> fred: yeah. yeah. >> seth: and yet i heard this morning, you hosted a companion awards show, is this true? >> fred: it's very true. the same night. >> seth: what? >> fred: same night. >> seth: oh you hosted -- it was the exact same night. >> fred: the exact same night, yeah. and we did it out of columbus, ohio. >> seth: okay. [ light laughter ] >> fred: and it was the nailies. >> seth: the nailies? >> fred: yeah. >> seth: and what do the nailies celebrate? >> fred: it's just like expertness in carpenters. [ laughter ] >> seth: okay. >> fred: carpentership. so it's just -- they give a sort of nail. >> seth: okay. >> fred: on a -- you know. and there were about 33 people, recipients of the award. >> seth: about? >> fred: about. >> seth: okay. >> fred: some of them were kind of a gray area, because they're still working on it. >> seth: yeah, oh yeah. >> fred: as they were, you know. building the houses and stuff. >> seth: oh, i gotcha. >> fred: so these are really great carpenters. we have, you know, the guy who won for best door. [ laughter ] you know. best hallway redoing. you know. [ light laughter ] >> seth: how are the speeches? >> fred: not good. [ laughter ] very -- which is, i understand that. but they just didn't really understand the concept of like -- i mean, it was a lot of waiting. we had to wait for them to come up on stage and stuff. but there was one speech that was beautiful. really gorgeous. by henry stevenson. >> seth: uh-huh. >> fred: know what -- i don't know if anyone knows him. [ laughter ] he worked on this airport. and he was just very like -- he was just very, like, humble. >> seth: uh-huh. >> fred: and he just -- very, very, like, heartfelt speech. >> seth: that's great. >> fred: yeah, it was great. it was really -- >> seth: and as the host, were there musical numbers? >> fred: yes. [ laughter ] yes. many musical numbers, and i think that's going to change for next year. >> seth: okay, great. >> fred: yeah. >> seth: well i can't wait for next year's nailies. thank you so much for being here. fred armisen everybody. [ cheers and applause ] our first guest tonight is an actor and comedian you know for his work on "saturday night live" and in films such as "horrible bosses" and "we're the millers." he stars in the sitcom "son of zorn," which airs sunday nights on fox. he can also be seen in the upcoming film "the book of love," which hits theaters and video on demand this friday. please welcome back to the show our very good friend jason sudeikis, everybody. ♪ ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> seth: hi buddy! >> hello! >> seth: so good to have you back! >> hi guys! [ cheers and applause ] >> seth: so they're very excited. they're very excited to see you and they -- i'm excited to see you because you -- >> very liberal use of the applause button, by the way. [ laughter ] >> seth: yeah, we went -- it's been jamming. >> is that what it is? it sticks? hmm, can't -- shouldn't eat waffles while you're running that button. >> seth: exactly, there he is. that guy's a syrup jockey. so i want to talk to you about -- friday night. >> mhmm. >> seth: you and your lovely companion, olivia -- >> mhmm. >> seth: you went to the white house for the final party. >> it was saturday night. >> seth: oh, saturday night? >> yeah, it was saturday, yeah. friday we got -- they sort of were like, "no, not now." >> seth: okay, gotcha. [ laughter ] >> "we're not ready for you." we're not ready. they were both -- michelle and barack were in their robes still, going, "oh, no we're not -- we're not dressed. it's tomorrow." [ light laughter ] >> seth: showing up early, that's no good. >> i blame the icalendar. >> seth: how was it? how was this party? >> ehh. >> steve: yeah, yeah. [ light laughter ] >> no, it's off the record. >> seth: yeah. >> but for you and you. [ light laughter ] how are your ratings by the way? >> seth: oh, they're really good. >> that's good, okay good. then here we go. no, it was amazing. >> seth: yeah. >> i'd never been to the white house before. >> seth: really? >> so that like never -- you know like scholastically on a field trip or protesting or easter egg hunting. or anything like that. [ laughter ] >> seth: you haven't been invited. >> no, nothing. no. >> seth: so this is a good final invite. >> absolutely. >> seth: or a good first invite. which is -- yeah -- >> yeah, i mean you know we'll see. an invite is different than a, you know, saying "yes." >> seth: yeah. >> an acceptance, right? but yeah -- >> seth: do you feel like saying yes, do you feel like anyone said no to this party? >> evidently, like, they sent out like 800, like, invites. i think they got two back that said they couldn't be there. >> seth: wow. >> yeah. it was tucker carlson. >> steve: uh-huh. [ laughter ] >> and his lovely mother. [ light laughter ] yeah. >> seth: what's the security like? >> intense. >> seth: yeah. >> as you would hope and expect. which is why i didn't bring, you know, all my extracurriculars with me. >> seth: sure. >> but they have a dog that goes through there at some point. you know, literally, you go through a metal detector. and it's everybody. i mean we were freezing outside. didn't -- thought we'd just get dropped off and then, you know, like decent human beings. you know, be able to roll in. no, we were in a freezing line with barely any coat on or anything like that in d.c. and you had like jeffrey katzenberg was in line. and bob iger, from disney, abc. and dave letterman was right next to us. so it's like -- they -- they don't care. >> seth: yeah. >> they're just like, "no, you've got to wait. we want everybody safe." i had -- a dog sniffs you. but the dog -- you're going through like a little thing and then there's a fan lightly blowing -- a waft of whatever you got going on. [ laughter ] or had going on. >> seth: right. >> earlier. [ light laughter ] and then the dog, the dog smells it. >> seth: and can the -- can the dog smell the difference between have and had? >> apparently. [ laughter ] >> seth: okay, yeah. >> because it smelled and then like, and then the guy was like, "okay." then sort of brought the dog back over, almost like you know, "you got this." like gave it a little pep talk or something. i'm sure it's just to clear out its, like its -- >> seth: yeah. >> whatever the thing is. >> seth: yeah. >> you know, olfactory senses. i don't know. i'm not a doctor. and then brought the dog back. and then the dog was like, calmed down. and the guy goes, "all right, you're good to go." he goes, "that was close -- [ laughter ] but you're good." and i go -- i go, "it's all right, i like close. i came here for the action." it's what i wanted. so it might have been -- and i'm of course referring to marijuana -- >> seth: yeah. >> for the record, not, you know, gun play. [ light laughter ] >> seth: right. it would have been great if you got shut down at the door. and you know, obama's saying, "wait, 797? i thought we only had two nos." [ light laughter ] >> yeah. well he was here. but he had like, a joint on him and so we had to let him go. >> seth: and no cameras. >> no cameras. no, you had to check -- you had to check your phones. and, again, like, if this was like, you know, the troubadour in l.a. or like kemper arena in kansas city. where, we put -- you put it in a lunch bag. they put -- olivia and i put our phones in a lunch bag, and then they just rolled it up, like mom used to do. and then we write on a sharpie our last name, and then i hand it to some lady. i haven't done that, like ever. i was like, "how am i trusting -- oh, right i'm at the white house. this is cool, it's cool." [ light laughter ] and sure enough, it came back, and i don't know. i mean, the nsa has it all anyway. >> seth: yeah. >> so what do i care? it's like, you know -- >> seth: right, exactly. >> the nsa and tim cook. like i'm a known entity. i'm in the cloud. so like -- and then we got it back, and it was very, you know, nonchalant. i didn't -- you didn't have to tip. which is you know -- >> seth: that's nice. [ laughter ] that's a bonus. >> it's weird when you tip, when there's people's photos on the money and on the walls. >> seth: yeah, right. you're giving a smaller picture of washington. >> you've got this big one, what do you need my picture of george washington for? this one is in color. [ light laughter ] >> seth: is it refreshing to not have your phone at an evening like that? >> a little bit. >> seth: yeah. >> but also -- i did have the tableau -- like the phantom, you know, ringing -- >> seth: right. >> throughout the evening. but then -- when we have two kids, we had a little girl three months ago. >> seth: congratulations. >> thank you very much. [ cheers and applause ] i mean you know -- thank you, thank you. you know olivia did most of the work. >> seth: yeah, yeah. >> you know. >> seth: i heard, i heard. >> so yeah, every time you referred to them, i'm like, "well, here." let me just wipe my hands -- >> seth: yeah. >> like i, you know, was just eating a doughnut. like i -- >> seth: yeah. >> there's no phone in my pocket. >> seth: and it would have been weird if you brought an entire photo album. >> but i should have done that. that would have been the move, is like have a little polaroid. and be like -- >> seth: yeah. >> but i didn't know. i thought literally, like this thing started at 8:30. on the invite it said gates close at 10:30. i thought it was going to be a two-hour party. kansas hayseed right here was just like, "liv, we got to make sure we get there on time, because it's done at 10:30." she's like, "i don't think it's done at 10:30, hun." i go, "the gates close at 10:30, i don't want to be stuck in there." >> seth: yeah. >> like, i'll never know how to get out. like, it's like -- that's not what it meant, at all. they went to like 4:30. it was like one of our after parties. >> seth: that's fantastic. >> it was nuts, and yeah, it was a really just a very joyful, interesting, lovely sort of sad time. i met him, you know, when he was on our show -- >> seth: yeah. >> back in october 2007. >> seth: yeah, candidate obama. >> senator, yeah exactly. >> seth: yeah. >> shook his hand, dressed up as spongebob squarepants. >> seth: yeah. >> because it was a halloween episode. >> seth: yeah. >> not just because it was off camera, for the record. and then to shake his hand. >> seth: there you go, good bookends. >> a little bookend, yeah. >> seth: very nice bookend. >> american bookends. >> seth: there you go. you've got a new movie. >> yeah. >> seth: "book of love." >> yes. >> seth: jessica biel, and maisie williams. >> yeah. from "game of thrones." >> seth: from "game of thrones." fantastic. >> yeah, yeah, yeah. >> seth: do you want -- we'll show clip and talk about it? how -- what order do you want to do this in? >> yeah, let's show the clip. >> seth: okay. >> well, the basic idea, i guess i should tell you what it is. the clip, it will make more sense, is that i play -- my wife passes away very early on in the movie, and to go through the mourning process, i promised my wife that i would help this little homeless girl build a raft out of trash. >> seth: got you. there you go. i'm glad you set it up. >> yeah. [ laughter ] >> seth: let's take a look. >> suck it! >> why are you building a raft? >> f off, amber alert! >> wait, hey, look, i have the plans, i have your plans right here. i did this. i mean, it's just from memory, but you know, with a few modifications -- i've got a ton of ideas. hey, well you can use my back yard, okay? please, this is my fault, let me -- let me help you. >> forget it! >> okay, stop. all right, now, look, i know you don't know me at all, and you're right to be dubious of strangers, but i just -- i really think i'm supposed to do this, to help you. >> sorry. >> and that's it. >> seth: fantastic. >> that's the whole movie. >> seth: that's it. [ laughter ] oh so, that was not a clip? that was the -- >> that was it. [ applause ] no, there's more. >> seth: so you, neither you and -- both of you? neither you and olivia watch "game of thrones?" >> no. >> seth: oh, my gosh. >> we're the two. >> seth: you're the two. >> yeah. there's the two people that said no to the party. and then we're the two people, that don't watch "game of thrones." >> seth: well, it must be refreshing though for maisie, to work with somebody who's not asking her a ton of questions about spoilers. >> absolutely. >> seth: yeah. >> i would like to think so. >> seth: yeah. >> i like to think if there's anything that she likes about me it's that i don't know what she does for a living. [ laughter ] i only knew her, as that, you know, little rugrat, you know, that wants to build a raft. for reasons we don't know. we didn't give that away, in the video. >> seth: well, there you go. that's always -- it's always good to tease. so great to have you here, buddy, always such a pleasure to see you. >> thank you, you too. yeah. >> seth: and come back soon. >> always. >> seth: give it up for jason sudeikis everybody. [ cheers and applause ] "son of zorn" airs sunday nights on fox. and "the book of love" hits theaters and video on demand this friday. we'll be right back with michelle monghan. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ ♪ ♪ you got your mom side. ♪ a just be calm side. ♪ you got a, "i never thought i'd get married at 65" side. ♪ ♪ "hey i'm just looking" side. ♪ man, you better buy that ride, whooo! ♪ ♪ that's why there's nationwide. ♪ ♪ they help to know, protect and grow your many sides. ♪ ♪ yeeeahhh ♪ nationwide is on your side. i believe in me too. ♪ i am the unicorn of your confidence ♪ ♪ ♪ hello, miss bates. do you have a tax question? i do. there's a bunch of creepy kids in this house i moved into. are they your kids? no, no, they were here when i moved in. that sounds awful. can i claim them as dependents? unfortunately, you can't, but you may be able to deduct some of your moving expenses. good, 'cause i'm gonna have to move again. ♪ applebee's all-in burger meal we're talkin' burger. fries. pepsi. prizes. like producer for a day with mike and mike. woo! get a burger, fries and a pepsi for just $9.99 at lunch, plus a shot at instant prizes. hey, l'eggo my eggo.hat needs? uh uh. not c-c-c - cause i have the and i - i. that's a lot. raisins. really? what just happened here? you know the rules. i make the rules. know the rules. keep your eggo. l'eggo my eggo. i'm doing this for you, dad. thanks son. ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> seth: welcome back, everybody. our next guest is a talented actress whose new film "sleepless" opens in theaters this friday. you can also see her in the second season of "the path" which premiers on hulu on january 25th. let's take a look. >> what happened? >> i hit her. >> okay. >> i killed her. because of you. >> because of me? >> yes, because of you. because you just spent $5 million that we don't have, because i don't know what i believe anymore, and i don't know who i am. >> no. that's not true. you know who you are -- >> no. you have turned me into a [ bleep ] hypocrite. and i'm standing there in front of people telling them some story i don't even know is true. >> seth: please welcome to the show michelle monaghan. ♪ [cheers and applause] >> steve: how are you? >> i'm really -- i'm doing a lot better than i am in that clip. >> seth: i'm glad you've rebounded. [ light laughter ] very emotional, but here you are. you look lovely. >> thank you. >> steve: and congratulations. you have "the path." you're in the upcoming film "patriots day" that i'm so excited to see, and you have a film with jamie foxx, "sleepless." >> i do, i do. >> seth: there's some physical activity, there's some fighting. >> there is. i -- >> seth: have you ever have to fight train for a film before? >> no, and i actually took it very seriously. i actually trained for two months with an amazing stunt coordinator, um, and it was a lot of fun, and i became very, very good at it. i will say, however, maybe too good. >> seth: oh, wow. >> and when i was fighting jamie, i actually clocked him right in the kisser. >> seth: because that seems to be part of the training would be not to do that. >> not to do that. i was a little quick on the draw, and i chipped his teeth. [ audience ohs ] and i split my knuckle open. [ light laughter ] and i was thinking, "oh, gosh. okay, let's stop." and he goes, "keep going." and i thought, "oh my god. okay." and we kept going and we kept shooting the scene, and then the next day i was so embarrassed. i was so sheepish. but i kept trying to like take a a look at his mouth and then i see that his teeth are fixed, they're perfect. >> seth: his teeth grew back? >> his teeth grew back in the middle of the night. [ laughter ] he basically -- his best friend is a dentist, and he got him to come over in the middle of the night and hook him up. >> seth: oh my god. >> only jamie foxx. >> seth: by the way -- yeah, that -- >> a dentist on call in the middle of the night. >> seth: that's a -- such a level of cool that you have a dentist -- [ laughter ] you can get a dentist in the middle of the night. >> on speed dial. [ light laughter ] >> seth: and "patriots day" -- this is a film about the boston marathon bombing, and i'm very excited to see it. pete berg, a fantastic director. >> yes. >> steve: mark wahlberg -- actually from boston, obviously, so his boston accent -- [ light laughter ] was it intimidating for you? >> it was probably one of the most intimidating things i've ever done. the boston accent is hahd. [ laughter ] and i actually -- but i found like a sneaky way. i actually worked on it really hard, once again. and i would get in the van with the teamsters, with the drivers that drive me to work really early in the morning, and it was still dark outside so i felt slightly less vulnerable. and i would immediately start working on my accent with them. and they indulged me, and by the time i got to work i was completely all warmed up. they were very sweet. i kind of have an affinity for teamsters because i learned how to drive an 18 wheeler. got my class a driver's license a few years ago. >> seth: was that for a part? >> it was for a part. >> steve: or for a side job? [ laughter ] >> i thought about it. every now and then i'm on set, and i ask them if i can move the trucks, but i got rid of my license. but they're always very nice to me, the teamsters -- >> seth: i think if a boston teamster told you your accent would be okay, it's okay because they're not ones to like give faint praise. >> oh no, no, no, no. not at all, not at all. and that's exactly why i was so nervous, but they gave me the green light so it's good, yeah. >> seth: now you are from, not boston but a very small town in iowa. >> i am. >> seth: and a thousand people? less than a thousand? >> 700 people. >> seth: seven hundos. so that's officially a small town. >> yeah, exactly. it has a bar, though. >> seth: oh, congratulations. >> thank you. [ light laughter ] >> seth: i actually drove it in. the sign says, "we have a bar." [ light laughter ] you -- and did you -- so you got your start modeling. did you come to new york first? >> no, i actually -- i started in japan. >> seth: really? >> of all places, when i was 17, i went to -- it was like the third time i was on a plane. i went to japan to model for three months. they give girls contracts there and i made some cash to put myself through college, but it is a bit of a culture shock because i'm like, a meat and potatoes kind of gal. >> seth: sure. did it -- i would imagine japan -- very hard to not -- >> different kind of bars. i mean they like -- the very first night i arrived actually i went to the model apartment. i met a couple of the girls, and they said, "you want to go to a sushi bar?" i really thought we were going to a bar. i had never even heard of sushi before. and so i was slightly disappointed when we rock up to the sushi bar and there's like a rotary, like of sushi. >> seth: and not a single miller high life. >> yeah, exactly. busch light. but basically i'm thinking, "what do i do here?" it's all moving around really slowly so i pick up the prettiest thing that i see. >> seth: gotcha. >> which is salmon roe. and it's round and it's orange and it's bright and it's shiny. and i pick that up, i pop it in my mouth. and if anybody's had salmon roe, it pops like salmon juice, like all over your mouth -- >> seth: if you don't know what's coming, it's bad. >> it's really bad. [ laughter ] so you know what you do? you reach for the guacamole that's going to -- [ audience oohs ] >> seth: no, that's problematic. [ laughter ] >> no, no, no, no. literally, i take it with my chopstick. i go like this. i put that in my mouth. i've never had so much pain in my life. >> steve: yeah. [ light laughter ] >> it's basically the biggest lucille ball moment of my life. [ light laughter ] everyone's looking at me. i'm screaming. yeah, it was really rough. really rough. >> seth: and they were like, "you know what, we're not going to make you do the full three months." >> you know what i did? i went straight to mcdonald's. [ laughter ] >> seth: that's good. there you go. that's what an iowa girl should do. >> exactly. [ applause ] >> seth: thank you so much for being here. congratulations on all three projects. >> thank you. >> seth: such a delight to see you, michelle. >> thank you. >> steve: michelle monaghan, everybody. [ cheers and applause ] the second season of "the path" premiers on hulu january 25th. we'll be right back with van jones. 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[ laughter ] we didn't mean it that way!" >> seth: but i watched that, and i have to say, and which is why you're providing a service. you watched those people say that, and you see where they're coming from. you see what lead them to make that decision. >> and i'll tell you, because they felt left out. that's the thing. listen, were there some voters who really loved all the inflammatory, racial stuff that trump said? yes, they were out there, and they voted. i've talked about those. but for that family -- that was a union family, a white union family that voted for democrats all the way down, but they didn't feel that the clinton campaign really was speaking to them. they had three, i think, factories close in their county, in the middle of the campaign. trump went to that county. clinton never went. and so they felt like, you know what? nobody cares about us, we're gonna try to vote. we don't like that stuff, but we gotta vote for our jobs. >> seth: and now, do you think the democratic party is doing a good enough job finding fault in their own efforts, as opposed to looking outward at external forces and blaming other things? >> is that a trick question? i mean, no. i mean, so far what you hear is, "it was the comey letter, it was the russians, it was all this stuff," and that's true. but she was running against an orange nightmare. she should have won 50 states. [ laughter ] i don't want to hear about the russians right now. i think that we thought as democrats that it was going to be a referendum on bigotry in the republican party. but in those counties where it mattered, it became a referendum on elitism in the democratic party, where people didn't feel that we understood what it meant to be a coal miner. what it meant to be a rust belt worker. and as a result, a lot of people just didn't feel the love. and now we say, "oh, well --" and then of course, we go the other way. "well, hillary was too multicultural, she was too pluralistic." no, no, we weren't pluralistic enough, we weren't multicultural enough. we should have had a bigger circle of love. >> seth: well, i am glad you mentioned that because we were sort of talking about white working class family in the rust belt. and i feel like that sort of demographics received a lot of attention after this election as having swung the tides. but in the next special you talk to black voters in michigan, and it does seem like they're being a little forgotten after this went down. they're affected by the results of this election as well but because they didn't swing it one way or the other, they seem neglected, attention-wise. >> but they did swing it. they did swing it. hillary clinton only lost michigan by 10,000 votes. there were 100,000 people in michigan alone who did not vote in 2016 who did vote in 2012 and 2008. so what happened to that 100,000? so i'm like, this is like a murder mystery. like, what happened? you know what i mean? if they had come out to vote, she would have won michigan easily. so i went to find out what happened with those voters. >> seth: and i have to imagine -- has it been -- because i assume sometimes it must be very frustrating talking to voters about how they came to their decision. other times it must be cathartic and it must be -- it must be nice to talk to voters who chose a different candidate as you and to realize you have more in common, because right now it seems like the media talks about how little we have in common. >> you know, it's -- there's a -- i'm a part of the problem. i am a pundit. and here's what happens. you're a pundit, and you're sitting there. and a republican says something that's actually very smart. that you hadn't -- you never thought of it before. but you don't think you can just say, "you got me." [ laughter ] right? you know? >> seth: yeah. >> like you feel like you have -- "au contraire," and keep the fight going. and you don't feel sometimes that you have the permissions for just the discovery and the confession. and so that's why it's so good to talk to ordinary people. because in the ordinary conversation with a regular person, if somebody says something that somebody didn't know, sometimes they might an admit that, and that's very refreshing. >> seth: yeah, talking about the punditry, we obviously saw you on cnn at the long desk, about 16 people. eight republicans, eight democrats. was there ever a time that you thought, "well, this is good, this is a helpful conversation, this is a nice way people talk?" [ light laughter ] >> at the commercial breaks. [ laughter ] you know, it's funny, though. those moments, you know, every now and again you do break through into a real conversation, and, you know, jeffrey lord and i had so many back and forths, and people kept asking me, "is jeffrey lord just making this up? is jeffry lord --" jeffrey lord believes every word. jeffery lord would say the same thing on set, at the commercial break, in the men's room, in the parking lot, in the uber. like, i get it jeff. you believe this stuff. and so we could actually have a real back and forth. and when we did do that, i think it was useful. >> seth: well, i really do appreciate it. i mean what i say. it's very refreshing. it's nice to watch you out there. and it's helpful, i think, for all of us to hear what led voters to this decision, especially in a sort of positive way that you're doing it. >> well, i just think that both political parties have some blind spots. and i think that both parties have a lot to learn. we need both parties to be better. and "the messy truth" is trying to figure out how we get there. >> seth: well thanks for doing it. and so -- thank you as well for being here. really appreciate it. van jones, everybody. [ cheers and applause ] >> thank you. >> seth: "the messy truth" airs january 11th on cnn. we'll be right back. 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[ cheers and applause ] fred armisen, 8g band. [ cheers and applause ] stay tuned for "carson daly." we'll see you tomorrow. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ >> carson: hey, what's up, everybody? you're watching "last call" from k-rock studios here in los angeles. i'm carson daly. thanks for being here. here's what we've got fo

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Transcripts For KNTV Late Night With Seth Meyers 20170110

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of american drama was criticized by meryl streep. [ laughter ] [ applause ] senate majority leader mitch mcconnell said yesterday republicans will begin repealing obamacare by the end of the week. but don't worry, he's not taking away your health care, he's just storing it in his cheeks for the winter. [ laughter and applause ] the movie "la la land" won a record seven golden globes last night. the movie tells the story of a struggling jazz musician named sebastian who against all odds is white. [ light laughter ] a new poll shows that 55% of americans are confident that donald trump will defend u.s. interests abroad. but an internet poll shows that 100% of americans are confident that -- [ russian accent ] comrade trump will be great success for glorious u.s. and also a. [ applause ] u.s. and a. trump advisor kellyanne conway said today that the media should not focus on what donald trump says and instead report on what is in his heart. although, really, how much is there to report about chicken grease? [ light laughter ] first lady michelle obama gave her final white house speech on friday where she told young people to, quote, "never fear." thought it was weird that she told old people to, quote, "watch your backs." [ laughter ] "you are not safe. watch your backs." more than 60 cities around the world celebrated the 16th annual no-pants subway ride yesterday. or as that one guy on your train calls it -- sunday. [ light laughter ] a woman at a hospital in detroit last week wore an electronic chewbacca mask while giving birth. "and while getting pregnant," said her husband, who's weird. [ laughter ] a man is claiming that his struggle with sleep apnea caused him to grope a woman's breasts on a flight. said the woman, "nice try, mr. president-elect." [ laughter and applause ] "it's a condition. it's a medical condition." [ light laughter ] on this day in 1493, christopher columbus famously mistook three manatees for mermaids, describing them as "not half as beautiful as they are painted." even weirder, he added, "but twice as good in the sack." [ light laughter ] you're not wrong. [ light laughter ] and finally, today was the ten year anniversary of the iphone. which makes tomorrow the ten year anniversary of your second iphone. [ laughter and applause ] ladies and gentlemen, we have a fantastic show for you tonight. he's in the new movies "the book of love." he's one of our dear friends. jason sudeikis is on the show tonight. [cheers and applause] she's one of the stars of hulu's "the path", now in its second season. michelle monaghan is joining us tonight. [ cheers and applause ] and he has a fantastic special called "the messy truth", it's back on cnn. van jones is joining us tonight. [ cheers and applause ] a very interesting guy that i'm looking forward to talking to. before we get to all that, the transition to donald trump's presidency has been just as chaotic in the first week of 2017 as it was before the new year. from the ongoing dispute over russian hacking to the gop's attempt to ram through cabinet appointments without fully vetting them. also, tweets. for more on this, it's time for "a closer look." ♪ [ applause ] >> seth: presidential transitions are a time to project an image of calm and stability by, for example, holding regular press conferences, or giving interviews. instead, trump has continued he habit of tweeting obsessively about some of the least important things you could possibly imagine, like the ratings for the all-new "celebrity apprentice." >> that a looks at this. he tweeted, "wow, the ratings are in and arnold schwarzenegger got swamped or destroyed by comparison to the ratings machine djt." referring to himself, clearly. "so much for being a movie star." the president-elect ends the tweet with this, "but who cares? he supported kasich and hillary." >> seth: when you end a tweet with the words "who cares," we all know the answer is you. [ laughter ] you care. and clearly this isn't exactly a carefully thought-out communication strategy, because one of trump's senior advisers and spokespeople, kellyanne conway, found out about the tweets while she was on the air on fox news. >> okay, look at this. >> uh-oh. >> your boss just tweeted again. "wow, the ratings are in and arnold schwarzenegger got swamped or destroyed by comparison to the ratings machine donald j. trump." and then, "so much for..." >> they'll be another one coming up. >> he's typing -- >> yeah, he's typing. well, good for him. [ laughter ] >> seth: "he's typing. good for him." she talks about him like he's a monkey at the state fair. "he's typing! in overalls, no less!" [ applause ] trump's impulsive stream of consciousness tweets might seem embarrassing for an incoming president, but trump is apparently proud of his twitter presence. so proud, that according to the "washington post", he boasts to friends, aides, and journalists alike, about the quality of his writing and claims that people call him "the ernest hemingway of twitter." [ audience ohs ] [ laughter ] though i would say you're just the ernest of twitter. [ applause ] seriously, if ernest hemingway heard you say that, he would kill himself again. [ laughter ] and any hopes that trump would start this week focused on serious issues were shattered when meryl streep -- while not mentioning him by name -- had this to say at the golden globes. >> when the powerful u their position to bully others, we all lose. >> seth: and sure enough, this morning the president-elect responded to streep in a series of tweets, including one that said -- "meryl streep, one of the most overrated actresses in hollywood, doesn't know me but attacked last night at the golden globes." overrated? she's so good, people use her to compliment people in other professions. like lebron james is the meryl streep of basketball. or donald trump is the meryl streep of having thin skin. [ laughter ] now, whether these tweets are calculated distractions or just the ramblings of an unhinged narcissist, it's clear trump would much rather talk about his feud with meryl streep than say the fact that intelligence officials believe russia hacked the democratic national committee and the clinton campaign to help trump win the election. since the election, trump has responded to the findings of the intelligence community by openly mocking them while showering praise on vladimir putin. >> mr. trump tweeted late friday that, quote, "vladimir putin said today about hillary and dems, in my opinion, it is humiliating. one must be able to lose with dignity. so true." >> donald trump tweeted, praising putin, "great move on delay by v. putin. i always knew he was very smart." >> seth: yeah, just so you know, you don't need the "v." [ light laughter ] we know which putin. no one is thinking "dave putin? from putin chevrolet?" [ light laughter ] in fact, rather than criticize russia for allegedly stealing private data and waging a disinformation campaign to interfere with the election, trump and his team have attacked the democrats for getting hacked in the first place. on friday, trump tweeted, "gross negligence by the democratic national committee allowed hacking to take place." so i guess it was gross negligence when trump himself announced in 2013, "my twitter has been seriously hacked. we are looking for the perpetrators." incidentally the best part about that 2013 hack was that all the hackers did was use trump's twitter account to post lil wayne lyrics. [ light laughter ] like this hacked trump tweet -- "these hoes think they classy. well that's the class i'm skippin'." [ laughter ] and you can tell that's not trump, because he didn't say the hoes were overrated. [ light laughter ] and it's important to question trump's word on anything hacking related, since he doesn't seem to have a firm grasp of how the technology works. take this comment from an impromptu press appearance just before the new year, when he said this about the allegations of russian hacking. >> i think we ought to get on with our lives. i think that computers have complicated lives very greatly. the whole, you know, age of computer has made it where nobody knows exactly what's going on. [ light laughter ] >> seth: well, if the age of computer is when don king just stands there and waves a giant american flag, i think trump is right -- nobody knows what's going on. [ laughter ] and then there was this comment on new year's eve when trump claimed the best way to prevent hacking is to just not use computers to send important messages. >> you know, if you have something really important, write it out and have it delivered by courier, the old-fashioned way. because i'll tell you what, no computer is safe. i don't care what they say. no computer is safe. i have a boy who's 10 years old, he can do anything with a computer. you want something to really go without detection, write it out and have it sent by courier. >> seth: great. or you could just go full lannister and communicate by raven. [ light laughter ] oh, wait, you can't. i just remembered a lannister always pays his debts. [ audience oohs ] [ applause ] so trump has praised vladimir putin and attacked the dnc instead of the russians for the hacking. and on top of that, he and his team have claimed repeatedly that even if russia did supply wikileaks with hacked emails from the dnc and the clinton campaign, it had no effect on the election. like just yesterday when conway said donald trump won because of things having nothing to do with the hacks. that's right. wikileaks had no effect on the election. which is why donald trump never bothered mentioning them on the campaign trail. except for over 100 times. >> as our own team has said -- and wikileaks. wikileaks that just came out. wikileaks just actually came out -- wikileaks is amazing. wikileaks! i love wikileaks. >> seth: wikileaks! [ light laughter ] i love it and i love to say it. wikileaks! [ light laughter ] he's just a boy in love with wikileaks. [ light laughter ] it's only a matter of time before he shows up outside julian assange's window. [ laughter and applause ] the scary thing -- the scary thing about trump's feud with the intelligence community isn't that skepticism is bad. in fact, skepticism of anonymous intelligence claims is essential and healthy. the scary thing is who trump is listening to instead of the intelligence community. take, for example, trump's pick for senior director of strategic communications for the national security council, monica crowley. this weekend, cnn reported that crowley had plagiarized multiple sources in her 2012 book, including the "new york times", wikipedia, and even a website for a podiatrist. [ light laughter ] that's right, trump's pick for director of strategic communications gets her info from a podiatrist's website. although, to be fair, her book was called "pictures of weird feet." [ light laughter ] crowley's appointment is yet another sign that trump may not be surrounding himself with the most competent or ethical people. which is why it's important to review all his cabinet nominees carefully. for example, cabinet appointments normally go through an ethics review process before they have their confirmation hearings. but this year, trump's team is doing things a little differently. >> we are now just days from the start of confirmation hearings in washington for u.s. president-elect donald trump's cabinet nominees. but the office of government ethics says several have still not been properly vetted. >> the problem? the office of government ethics has not received the nominees' financial disclosure information. >> as government ethics watchdogs expressed great concerns about incomplete background checks. "we seem to have lost contact with the trump-pence transition since the election," the ethics chief complains to the president-elect's team. >> seth: lost contact with him? did you try back stage at the miss usa pageant? [ light laughter ] so republicans are trying to ram through trump's cabinet appointments without vetting them first, and that's bad, because we need congress to exercise its oversight over a trump presidency that rife with potential for conflicts of interest and corruption. trump also has a tendency to associate with some shady characters. like at his new year's party at his mar-a-lago club, where he bragged to a crowd of wealthy patrons that he was going to9 cut their taxes and take health insurance away from millions of people. >> all i can tell you is we're going to do a good job. okay? [ cheers ] your taxes are coming down. regulations are coming off. we're going to get rid of obamacare, because -- [ cheers ] >> seth: they cheered the prospect of people losing health insurance like nasa landing a rover on mars. "the eagle has landed, and he does not have health or dental." [ light laughter ] but see that guy on trump's left celebrating? when he says they're going to repeal obamacare, he's not just any old rich guy. according to "the daily news", he's actually a convicted felon with ties to notorious gambino crime family boss, john gotti. and he goes by the nickname, and this is real, "joey no socks." [ laughter ] are you sure that's the kind of guy you want to associate with? i'm talking to you, joey. [ laughter and applause ] this has been "a closer look." ♪ [ applause ] we'll be right back with our friend jason sudeikis, everybody. 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[ cheers and applause ] glad to have you guys here. happy new year. also we have fred armisen with us this week. so -- [ cheers and applause ] delighted to have you here, fred. >> fred: you too. >> seth: everything -- well, also i want to congratulate you, fred. season seven of "portlandia" started last week. [ applause ] >> fred: yeah, we just started. >> seth: amazing. >> fred: yeah, season seven. >> seth: and yet, even with "portlandia" you have time for other projects, which just blows my mind. you're here, you're at "portlandia," and last night were the golden globes. and our friend jimmy fallon hosted, did a fantastic job, i thought. >> fred: yeah. yeah. >> seth: and yet i heard this morning, you hosted a companion awards show, is this true? >> fred: it's very true. the same night. >> seth: what? >> fred: same night. >> seth: oh you hosted -- it was the exact same night. >> fred: the exact same night, yeah. and we did it out of columbus, ohio. >> seth: okay. [ light laughter ] >> fred: and it was the nailies. >> seth: the nailies? >> fred: yeah. >> seth: and what do the nailies celebrate? >> fred: it's just like expertness in carpenters. [ laughter ] >> seth: okay. >> fred: carpentership. so it's just -- they give a sort of nail. >> seth: okay. >> fred: on a -- you know. and there were about 33 people, recipients of the award. >> seth: about? >> fred: about. >> seth: okay. >> fred: some of them were kind of a gray area, because they're still working on it. >> seth: yeah, oh yeah. >> fred: as they were, you know. building the houses and stuff. >> seth: oh, i gotcha. >> fred: so these are really great carpenters. we have, you know, the guy who won for best door. [ laughter ] you know. best hallway redoing. you know. [ light laughter ] >> seth: how are the speeches? >> fred: not good. [ laughter ] very -- which is, i understand that. but they just didn't really understand the concept of like -- i mean, it was a lot of waiting. we had to wait for them to come up on stage and stuff. but there was one speech that was beautiful. really gorgeous. by henry stevenson. >> seth: uh-huh. >> fred: know what -- i don't know if anyone knows him. [ laughter ] he worked on this airport. and he was just very like -- he was just very, like, humble. >> seth: uh-huh. >> fred: and he just -- very, very, like, heartfelt speech. >> seth: that's great. >> fred: yeah, it was great. it was really -- >> seth: and as the host, were there musical numbers? >> fred: yes. [ laughter ] yes. many musical numbers, and i think that's going to change for next year. >> seth: okay, great. >> fred: yeah. >> seth: well i can't wait for next year's nailies. thank you so much for being here. fred armisen everybody. [ cheers and applause ] our first guest tonight is an actor and comedian you know for his work on "saturday night live" and in films such as "horrible bosses" and "we're the millers." he stars in the sitcom "son of zorn," which airs sunday nights on fox. he can also be seen in the upcoming film "the book of love," which hits theaters and video on demand this friday. please welcome back to the show our very good friend jason sudeikis, everybody. ♪ ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> seth: hi buddy! >> hello! >> seth: so good to have you back! >> hi guys! [ cheers and applause ] >> seth: so they're very excited. they're very excited to see you and they -- i'm excited to see you because you -- >> very liberal use of the applause button, by the way. [ laughter ] >> seth: yeah, we went -- it's been jamming. >> is that what it is? it sticks? hmm, can't -- shouldn't eat waffles while you're running that button. >> seth: exactly, there he is. that guy's a syrup jockey. so i want to talk to you about -- friday night. >> mhmm. >> seth: you and your lovely companion, olivia -- >> mhmm. >> seth: you went to the white house for the final party. >> it was saturday night. >> seth: oh, saturday night? >> yeah, it was saturday, yeah. friday we got -- they sort of were like, "no, not now." >> seth: okay, gotcha. [ laughter ] >> "we're not ready for you." we're not ready. they were both -- michelle and barack were in their robes still, going, "oh, no we're not -- we're not dressed. it's tomorrow." [ light laughter ] >> seth: showing up early, that's no good. >> i blame the icalendar. >> seth: how was it? how was this party? >> ehh. >> steve: yeah, yeah. [ light laughter ] >> no, it's off the record. >> seth: yeah. >> but for you and you. [ light laughter ] how are your ratings by the way? >> seth: oh, they're really good. >> that's good, okay good. then here we go. no, it was amazing. >> seth: yeah. >> i'd never been to the white house before. >> seth: really? >> so that like never -- you know like scholastically on a field trip or protesting or easter egg hunting. or anything like that. [ laughter ] >> seth: you haven't been invited. >> no, nothing. no. >> seth: so this is a good final invite. >> absolutely. >> seth: or a good first invite. which is -- yeah -- >> yeah, i mean you know we'll see. an invite is different than a, you know, saying "yes." >> seth: yeah. >> an acceptance, right? but yeah -- >> seth: do you feel like saying yes, do you feel like anyone said no to this party? >> evidently, like, they sent out like 800, like, invites. i think they got two back that said they couldn't be there. >> seth: wow. >> yeah. it was tucker carlson. >> steve: uh-huh. [ laughter ] >> and his lovely mother. [ light laughter ] yeah. >> seth: what's the security like? >> intense. >> seth: yeah. >> as you would hope and expect. which is why i didn't bring, you know, all my extracurriculars with me. >> seth: sure. >> but they have a dog that goes through there at some point. you know, literally, you go through a metal detector. and it's everybody. i mean we were freezing outside. didn't -- thought we'd just get dropped off and then, you know, like decent human beings. you know, be able to roll in. no, we were in a freezing line with barely any coat on or anything like that in d.c. and you had like jeffrey katzenberg was in line. and bob iger, from disney, abc. and dave letterman was right next to us. so it's like -- they -- they don't care. >> seth: yeah. >> they're just like, "no, you've got to wait. we want everybody safe." i had -- a dog sniffs you. but the dog -- you're going through like a little thing and then there's a fan lightly blowing -- a waft of whatever you got going on. [ laughter ] or had going on. >> seth: right. >> earlier. [ light laughter ] and then the dog, the dog smells it. >> seth: and can the -- can the dog smell the difference between have and had? >> apparently. [ laughter ] >> seth: okay, yeah. >> because it smelled and then like, and then the guy was like, "okay." then sort of brought the dog back over, almost like you know, "you got this." like gave it a little pep talk or something. i'm sure it's just to clear out its, like its -- >> seth: yeah. >> whatever the thing is. >> seth: yeah. >> you know, olfactory senses. i don't know. i'm not a doctor. and then brought the dog back. and then the dog was like, calmed down. and the guy goes, "all right, you're good to go." he goes, "that was close -- [ laughter ] but you're good." and i go -- i go, "it's all right, i like close. i came here for the action." it's what i wanted. so it might have been -- and i'm of course referring to marijuana -- >> seth: yeah. >> for the record, not, you know, gun play. [ light laughter ] >> seth: right. it would have been great if you got shut down at the door. and you know, obama's saying, "wait, 797? i thought we only had two nos." [ light laughter ] >> yeah. well he was here. but he had like, a joint on him and so we had to let him go. >> seth: and no cameras. >> no cameras. no, you had to check -- you had to check your phones. and, again, like, if this was like, you know, the troubadour in l.a. or like kemper arena in kansas city. where, we put -- you put it in a lunch bag. they put -- olivia and i put our phones in a lunch bag, and then they just rolled it up, like mom used to do. and then we write on a sharpie our last name, and then i hand it to some lady. i haven't done that, like ever. i was like, "how am i trusting -- oh, right i'm at the white house. this is cool, it's cool." [ light laughter ] and sure enough, it came back, and i don't know. i mean, the nsa has it all anyway. >> seth: yeah. >> so what do i care? it's like, you know -- >> seth: right, exactly. >> the nsa and tim cook. like i'm a known entity. i'm in the cloud. so like -- and then we got it back, and it was very, you know, nonchalant. i didn't -- you didn't have to tip. which is you know -- >> seth: that's nice. [ laughter ] that's a bonus. >> it's weird when you tip, when there's people's photos on the money and on the walls. >> seth: yeah, right. you're giving a smaller picture of washington. >> you've got this big one, what do you need my picture of george washington for? this one is in color. [ light laughter ] >> seth: is it refreshing to not have your phone at an evening like that? >> a little bit. >> seth: yeah. >> but also -- i did have the tableau -- like the phantom, you know, ringing -- >> seth: right. >> throughout the evening. but then -- when we have two kids, we had a little girl three months ago. >> seth: congratulations. >> thank you very much. [ cheers and applause ] i mean you know -- thank you, thank you. you know olivia did most of the work. >> seth: yeah, yeah. >> you know. >> seth: i heard, i heard. >> so yeah, every time you referred to them, i'm like, "well, here." let me just wipe my hands -- >> seth: yeah. >> like i, you know, was just eating a doughnut. like i -- >> seth: yeah. >> there's no phone in my pocket. >> seth: and it would have been weird if you brought an entire photo album. >> but i should have done that. that would have been the move, is like have a little polaroid. and be like -- >> seth: yeah. >> but i didn't know. i thought literally, like this thing started at 8:30. on the invite it said gates close at 10:30. i thought it was going to be a two-hour party. kansas hayseed right here was just like, "liv, we got to make sure we get there on time, because it's done at 10:30." she's like, "i don't think it's done at 10:30, hun." i go, "the gates close at 10:30, i don't want to be stuck in there." >> seth: yeah. >> like, i'll never know how to get out. like, it's like -- that's not what it meant, at all. they went to like 4:30. it was like one of our after parties. >> seth: that's fantastic. >> it was nuts, and yeah, it was a really just a very joyful, interesting, lovely sort of sad time. i met him, you know, when he was on our show -- >> seth: yeah. >> back in october 2007. >> seth: yeah, candidate obama. >> senator, yeah exactly. >> seth: yeah. >> shook his hand, dressed up as spongebob squarepants. >> seth: yeah. >> because it was a halloween episode. >> seth: yeah. >> not just because it was off camera, for the record. and then to shake his hand. >> seth: there you go, good bookends. >> a little bookend, yeah. >> seth: very nice bookend. >> american bookends. >> seth: there you go. you've got a new movie. >> yeah. >> seth: "book of love." >> yes. >> seth: jessica biel, and maisie williams. >> yeah. from "game of thrones." >> seth: from "game of thrones." fantastic. >> yeah, yeah, yeah. >> seth: do you want -- we'll show clip and talk about it? how -- what order do you want to do this in? >> yeah, let's show the clip. >> seth: okay. >> well, the basic idea, i guess i should tell you what it is. the clip, it will make more sense, is that i play -- my wife passes away very early on in the movie, and to go through the mourning process, i promised my wife that i would help this little homeless girl build a raft out of trash. >> seth: got you. there you go. i'm glad you set it up. >> yeah. [ laughter ] >> seth: let's take a look. >> suck it! >> why are you building a raft? >> f off, amber alert! >> wait, hey, look, i have the plans, i have your plans right here. i did this. i mean, it's just from memory, but you know, with a few modifications -- i've got a ton of ideas. hey, well you can use my back yard, okay? please, this is my fault, let me -- let me help you. >> forget it! >> okay, stop. all right, now, look, i know you don't know me at all, and you're right to be dubious of strangers, but i just -- i really think i'm supposed to do this, to help you. >> sorry. >> and that's it. >> seth: fantastic. >> that's the whole movie. >> seth: that's it. [ laughter ] oh so, that was not a clip? that was the -- >> that was it. [ applause ] no, there's more. >> seth: so you, neither you and -- both of you? neither you and olivia watch "game of thrones?" >> no. >> seth: oh, my gosh. >> we're the two. >> seth: you're the two. >> yeah. there's the two people that said no to the party. and then we're the two people, that don't watch "game of thrones." >> seth: well, it must be refreshing though for maisie, to work with somebody who's not asking her a ton of questions about spoilers. >> absolutely. >> seth: yeah. >> i would like to think so. >> seth: yeah. >> i like to think if there's anything that she likes about me it's that i don't know what she does for a living. [ laughter ] i only knew her, as that, you know, little rugrat, you know, that wants to build a raft. for reasons we don't know. we didn't give that away, in the video. >> seth: well, there you go. that's always -- it's always good to tease. so great to have you here, buddy, always such a pleasure to see you. >> thank you, you too. yeah. >> seth: and come back soon. >> always. >> seth: give it up for jason sudeikis everybody. [ cheers and applause ] "son of zorn" airs sunday nights on fox. and "the book of love" hits theaters and video on demand this friday. we'll be right back with michelle monghan. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ ♪ ♪ you got your mom side. ♪ a just be calm side. ♪ you got a, "i never thought i'd get married at 65" side. ♪ ♪ "hey i'm just looking" side. ♪ man, you better buy that ride, whooo! ♪ ♪ that's why there's nationwide. ♪ ♪ they help to know, protect and grow your many sides. ♪ ♪ yeeeahhh ♪ nationwide is on your side. i believe in me too. ♪ i am the unicorn of your confidence ♪ ♪ ♪ hello, miss bates. do you have a tax question? i do. there's a bunch of creepy kids in this house i moved into. are they your kids? no, no, they were here when i moved in. that sounds awful. can i claim them as dependents? unfortunately, you can't, but you may be able to deduct some of your moving expenses. good, 'cause i'm gonna have to move again. ♪ applebee's all-in burger meal we're talkin' burger. fries. pepsi. prizes. like producer for a day with mike and mike. woo! get a burger, fries and a pepsi for just $9.99 at lunch, plus a shot at instant prizes. hey, l'eggo my eggo.hat needs? uh uh. not c-c-c - cause i have the and i - i. that's a lot. raisins. really? what just happened here? you know the rules. i make the rules. know the rules. keep your eggo. l'eggo my eggo. i'm doing this for you, dad. thanks son. ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> seth: welcome back, everybody. our next guest is a talented actress whose new film "sleepless" opens in theaters this friday. you can also see her in the second season of "the path" which premiers on hulu on january 25th. let's take a look. >> what happened? >> i hit her. >> okay. >> i killed her. because of you. >> because of me? >> yes, because of you. because you just spent $5 million that we don't have, because i don't know what i believe anymore, and i don't know who i am. >> no. that's not true. you know who you are -- >> no. you have turned me into a [ bleep ] hypocrite. and i'm standing there in front of people telling them some story i don't even know is true. >> seth: please welcome to the show michelle monaghan. ♪ [cheers and applause] >> steve: how are you? >> i'm really -- i'm doing a lot better than i am in that clip. >> seth: i'm glad you've rebounded. [ light laughter ] very emotional, but here you are. you look lovely. >> thank you. >> steve: and congratulations. you have "the path." you're in the upcoming film "patriots day" that i'm so excited to see, and you have a film with jamie foxx, "sleepless." >> i do, i do. >> seth: there's some physical activity, there's some fighting. >> there is. i -- >> seth: have you ever have to fight train for a film before? >> no, and i actually took it very seriously. i actually trained for two months with an amazing stunt coordinator, um, and it was a lot of fun, and i became very, very good at it. i will say, however, maybe too good. >> seth: oh, wow. >> and when i was fighting jamie, i actually clocked him right in the kisser. >> seth: because that seems to be part of the training would be not to do that. >> not to do that. i was a little quick on the draw, and i chipped his teeth. [ audience ohs ] and i split my knuckle open. [ light laughter ] and i was thinking, "oh, gosh. okay, let's stop." and he goes, "keep going." and i thought, "oh my god. okay." and we kept going and we kept shooting the scene, and then the next day i was so embarrassed. i was so sheepish. but i kept trying to like take a a look at his mouth and then i see that his teeth are fixed, they're perfect. >> seth: his teeth grew back? >> his teeth grew back in the middle of the night. [ laughter ] he basically -- his best friend is a dentist, and he got him to come over in the middle of the night and hook him up. >> seth: oh my god. >> only jamie foxx. >> seth: by the way -- yeah, that -- >> a dentist on call in the middle of the night. >> seth: that's a -- such a level of cool that you have a dentist -- [ laughter ] you can get a dentist in the middle of the night. >> on speed dial. [ light laughter ] >> seth: and "patriots day" -- this is a film about the boston marathon bombing, and i'm very excited to see it. pete berg, a fantastic director. >> yes. >> steve: mark wahlberg -- actually from boston, obviously, so his boston accent -- [ light laughter ] was it intimidating for you? >> it was probably one of the most intimidating things i've ever done. the boston accent is hahd. [ laughter ] and i actually -- but i found like a sneaky way. i actually worked on it really hard, once again. and i would get in the van with the teamsters, with the drivers that drive me to work really early in the morning, and it was still dark outside so i felt slightly less vulnerable. and i would immediately start working on my accent with them. and they indulged me, and by the time i got to work i was completely all warmed up. they were very sweet. i kind of have an affinity for teamsters because i learned how to drive an 18 wheeler. got my class a driver's license a few years ago. >> seth: was that for a part? >> it was for a part. >> steve: or for a side job? [ laughter ] >> i thought about it. every now and then i'm on set, and i ask them if i can move the trucks, but i got rid of my license. but they're always very nice to me, the teamsters -- >> seth: i think if a boston teamster told you your accent would be okay, it's okay because they're not ones to like give faint praise. >> oh no, no, no, no. not at all, not at all. and that's exactly why i was so nervous, but they gave me the green light so it's good, yeah. >> seth: now you are from, not boston but a very small town in iowa. >> i am. >> seth: and a thousand people? less than a thousand? >> 700 people. >> seth: seven hundos. so that's officially a small town. >> yeah, exactly. it has a bar, though. >> seth: oh, congratulations. >> thank you. [ light laughter ] >> seth: i actually drove it in. the sign says, "we have a bar." [ light laughter ] you -- and did you -- so you got your start modeling. did you come to new york first? >> no, i actually -- i started in japan. >> seth: really? >> of all places, when i was 17, i went to -- it was like the third time i was on a plane. i went to japan to model for three months. they give girls contracts there and i made some cash to put myself through college, but it is a bit of a culture shock because i'm like, a meat and potatoes kind of gal. >> seth: sure. did it -- i would imagine japan -- very hard to not -- >> different kind of bars. i mean they like -- the very first night i arrived actually i went to the model apartment. i met a couple of the girls, and they said, "you want to go to a sushi bar?" i really thought we were going to a bar. i had never even heard of sushi before. and so i was slightly disappointed when we rock up to the sushi bar and there's like a rotary, like of sushi. >> seth: and not a single miller high life. >> yeah, exactly. busch light. but basically i'm thinking, "what do i do here?" it's all moving around really slowly so i pick up the prettiest thing that i see. >> seth: gotcha. >> which is salmon roe. and it's round and it's orange and it's bright and it's shiny. and i pick that up, i pop it in my mouth. and if anybody's had salmon roe, it pops like salmon juice, like all over your mouth -- >> seth: if you don't know what's coming, it's bad. >> it's really bad. [ laughter ] so you know what you do? you reach for the guacamole that's going to -- [ audience oohs ] >> seth: no, that's problematic. [ laughter ] >> no, no, no, no. literally, i take it with my chopstick. i go like this. i put that in my mouth. i've never had so much pain in my life. >> steve: yeah. [ light laughter ] >> it's basically the biggest lucille ball moment of my life. [ light laughter ] everyone's looking at me. i'm screaming. yeah, it was really rough. really rough. >> seth: and they were like, "you know what, we're not going to make you do the full three months." >> you know what i did? i went straight to mcdonald's. [ laughter ] >> seth: that's good. there you go. that's what an iowa girl should do. >> exactly. [ applause ] >> seth: thank you so much for being here. congratulations on all three projects. >> thank you. >> seth: such a delight to see you, michelle. >> thank you. >> steve: michelle monaghan, everybody. [ cheers and applause ] the second season of "the path" premiers on hulu january 25th. we'll be right back with van jones. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ ♪ there's more than one route to the top. the lexus ls and lx. each offering leading-edge comfort, safety and performance technologies. the ultimate in refinement meets the ultimate in capability. lease the 2017 lx 570 for $899 a month for 36 months. see your lexus dealer. once upon a time a girl with golden locks broke into a house owned by three bears. she ate some porridge, broke the baby bear's chair, and stole some jewelry, a flat-screen tv, and a laptop. luckily the geico insurance agency had helped the bears with homeowners insurance. they were able to replace all their items... ...including a new chair from crate and barrel. call geico and see how easy it is to switch and save on homeowners insurance. hashtag stuffy nose. hashtag no sleep. hashtag mouthbreather. just put on a breathe right strip. it instantly opens your nose up to 38% more than cold medicine alone. shut your mouth and say goodnight mouthbreathers. breathe right. hurry in for olive garden's just $10.99. italian dinner, start with unlimited soup or salad and breadsticks. choose your favorite pasta and sauce combination. top it off with a delicious dessert. that's three courses for just $10.99. only at olive garden. hair is delightfully fragrancedl with notes of moroccan rose and the freshness of springtime unforgettable, wherever you go the scents you can't forget... from herbal essences, blooming now! ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> seth: welcome back, everybody. our next guest is a cnn political commentator. his special "the messy truth" airs january 11th on cnn. let's take a look. >> the clinton campaign spent a lot of money on data, and they had big data that showed they were going to have a big victory on election night. >> i would say to that data don't vote. if you don't build an organization that is based on relationships, understanding the issues, then you can model and data and statistic your way through a losing campaign, and that's exactly what happened with the clinton campaign. >> seth: please welcome to the show van jones. ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> seth: how are you? >> i'm good. >> seth: good. i want to commend you on this special, because i think it's providing a great service, because you basically are going out, you're talking to voters about why they voted. >> yep. >> seth: and some of them voted for hillary. some of them voted for donald trump. but -- and i think it speaks to the title, "the messy truth." i feel like now a lot of punditry is saying "he won because of this, she won because of that." but you kind of find out that people have different -- there's are a lot of reasons people made their decisions. >> you know, when you get out there and you talk to people, it's just amazing. i went -- i got a chance to go to ohio, and i talked to two-time obama voters who voted for trump. and i said, "well, why, how?" i don't -- [ light laughter ] i'm confused." you know. and they said, "well, we voted for change, and then we voted for change again." and i said, "that's not what we meant in 2008. [ laughter ] we didn't mean it that way!" >> seth: but i watched that, and i have to say, and which is why you're providing a service. you watched those people say that, and you see where they're coming from. you see what lead them to make that decision. >> and i'll tell you, because they felt left out. that's the thing. listen, were there some voters who really loved all the inflammatory, racial stuff that trump said? yes, they were out there, and they voted. i've talked about those. but for that family -- that was a union family, a white union family that voted for democrats all the way down, but they didn't feel that the clinton campaign really was speaking to them. they had three, i think, factories close in their county, in the middle of the campaign. trump went to that county. clinton never went. and so they felt like, you know what? nobody cares about us, we're gonna try to vote. we don't like that stuff, but we gotta vote for our jobs. >> seth: and now, do you think the democratic party is doing a good enough job finding fault in their own efforts, as opposed to looking outward at external forces and blaming other things? >> is that a trick question? i mean, no. i mean, so far what you hear is, "it was the comey letter, it was the russians, it was all this stuff," and that's true. but she was running against an orange nightmare. she should have won 50 states. [ laughter ] i don't want to hear about the russians right now. i think that we thought as democrats that it was going to be a referendum on bigotry in the republican party. but in those counties where it mattered, it became a referendum on elitism in the democratic party, where people didn't feel that we understood what it meant to be a coal miner. what it meant to be a rust belt worker. and as a result, a lot of people just didn't feel the love. and now we say, "oh, well --" and then of course, we go the other way. "well, hillary was too multicultural, she was too pluralistic." no, no, we weren't pluralistic enough, we weren't multicultural enough. we should have had a bigger circle of love. >> seth: well, i am glad you mentioned that because we were sort of talking about white working class family in the rust belt. and i feel like that sort of demographics received a lot of attention after this election as having swung the tides. but in the next special you talk to black voters in michigan, and it does seem like they're being a little forgotten after this went down. they're affected by the results of this election as well but because they didn't swing it one way or the other, they seem neglected, attention-wise. >> but they did swing it. they did swing it. hillary clinton only lost michigan by 10,000 votes. there were 100,000 people in michigan alone who did not vote in 2016 who did vote in 2012 and 2008. so what happened to that 100,000? so i'm like, this is like a murder mystery. like, what happened? you know what i mean? if they had come out to vote, she would have won michigan easily. so i went to find out what happened with those voters. >> seth: and i have to imagine -- has it been -- because i assume sometimes it must be very frustrating talking to voters about how they came to their decision. other times it must be cathartic and it must be -- it must be nice to talk to voters who chose a different candidate as you and to realize you have more in common, because right now it seems like the media talks about how little we have in common. >> you know, it's -- there's a -- i'm a part of the problem. i am a pundit. and here's what happens. you're a pundit, and you're sitting there. and a republican says something that's actually very smart. that you hadn't -- you never thought of it before. but you don't think you can just say, "you got me." [ laughter ] right? you know? >> seth: yeah. >> like you feel like you have -- "au contraire," and keep the fight going. and you don't feel sometimes that you have the permissions for just the discovery and the confession. and so that's why it's so good to talk to ordinary people. because in the ordinary conversation with a regular person, if somebody says something that somebody didn't know, sometimes they might an admit that, and that's very refreshing. >> seth: yeah, talking about the punditry, we obviously saw you on cnn at the long desk, about 16 people. eight republicans, eight democrats. was there ever a time that you thought, "well, this is good, this is a helpful conversation, this is a nice way people talk?" [ light laughter ] >> at the commercial breaks. [ laughter ] you know, it's funny, though. those moments, you know, every now and again you do break through into a real conversation, and, you know, jeffrey lord and i had so many back and forths, and people kept asking me, "is jeffrey lord just making this up? is jeffry lord --" jeffrey lord believes every word. jeffery lord would say the same thing on set, at the commercial break, in the men's room, in the parking lot, in the uber. like, i get it jeff. you believe this stuff. and so we could actually have a real back and forth. and when we did do that, i think it was useful. >> seth: well, i really do appreciate it. i mean what i say. it's very refreshing. it's nice to watch you out there. and it's helpful, i think, for all of us to hear what led voters to this decision, especially in a sort of positive way that you're doing it. >> well, i just think that both political parties have some blind spots. and i think that both parties have a lot to learn. we need both parties to be better. and "the messy truth" is trying to figure out how we get there. >> seth: well thanks for doing it. and so -- thank you as well for being here. really appreciate it. van jones, everybody. [ cheers and applause ] >> thank you. >> seth: "the messy truth" airs january 11th on cnn. we'll be right back. 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[ cheers and applause ] fred armisen, 8g band. [ cheers and applause ] stay tuned for "carson daly." we'll see you tomorrow. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ >> carson: hey, what's up, everybody? you're watching "last call" from k-rock studios here in los angeles. i'm carson daly. thanks for being here. here's what we've got fo

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