To be her or donald trump. I wish they could just get along. Donald trump. Hillary clinton is a liar. A big liar. The inside of my eye patch smells like hot dogs. History, first woman president. When will this be over. Donald trump is always shouting. Whats going to happen . I dont know. Obviously, hillary is steeped in the systemic is offset by years of experience necessary to deal with a complicated world. I like butter fingers the most. Announcer its the late show with Stephen Colbert with Stephen Colbert smoove and the ghost brothers jon batiste and stay human. Live from new york city, its Stephen Colbert cheers and applause . Captioning sponsored by cbs stephen thank cheers and applause hey welcome to the late show. Im Stephen Colbert. Thank you for being in here, out there, all around the world. cheers and applause very nice. Hope you like my costume. Im dressed as the spookiest october surprise f. B. I. Director james coooomeyyyy cheers and applause because was he really because, on friday, comey reanimated the corpse of the Hillary Clinton email scandal. Its alive its alive comey sent a letter to congress saying the f. B. I. May have found more clinton emails. And thats spurred a lot of questions like how damaging is this . Will it throw the election for trump . And whats a letter . Is that like a gif that doesnt the f. B. I. Found the emails while investigating illicit messages sent to an underage girl by clinton aide huma abedins estranged husband and esstrange guy Anthony Weiner. laughter apparently, they found them while searching his laptop. Dear god, i hope they used gloves. laughter and some purelle, just soaked it down. laughter weiners penis might destroy two political careers. laughter powerful thats powerful its a monster cheers and applause get out of there get out the calls are coming from inside his pants laughter the Clinton Campaign has finally found something even messier than wikileaks. Its weiner leaks. laughter laughter this october surprise comes right as secretary clinton was riding high in the polls in the wake of Sexual Assault accusations against donald trump. Truly, for the Clinton Campaign, horny men giveth, and horny men taketh away. laughter applause whats amazing about this jon wow. Stephen its true. Whats amazing is, this is a hugehe and trump wasted no time grabbing this story by the weiner. This is the biggest political scandal since watergate. Her criminal action was willful, deliberate, intentional and purposeful. Stephen uh. It was also voluntary, conscious, resolved, designful and aforethought. applause the election but hes going to ace the a. C. T. S. Jon thats right. Stephen so this is it. Emails that could tip the election in favor of a sexually ravenous, shambling, orange baby man. So what do they say . These emails must be explosive, to defy the longstanding policy of the Justice Department that discussing investigations could taint the results of an election, now a mere eight days away. They must be packed with damning revelations, malfeasance, abuse of office, and unprecedented levels of corruption. So what does the letter say . The fbi cannot yet assess whether or not this material may be significant. So nothing. Or everything. Thats like a captain yelling all hands on deck head to the lifeboats at some point, maybe. I have no further information the f. B. I. Didnt even have a warrant to read the emails until last night. And its going to take awhile, because apparently they now have to read 650,000 emails. My god how much boner pill spam does Anthony Weiner get . laughter know. Nothing. We dont know whats in the emails. We dont know when were going to know whats in the emails. We dont know what effect this is going to have on this election. I dont know why comey sent this letter. Its like the old saying, if a tree falls in the forest and no one is around to hear it, its still more informative than james comey. Now, comey defended his actions in a letter to f. B. I. Employees, of course, we dont ordinarily Tell Congress about ongoing investigations, but here i feel an obligation to do so, given that i testified repeatedly in recent months that our investigation was completed. At the same time, however, given that we dont know the significance of this newly discovered collection of emails, i dont want to create a misleading impression. Yeah, you wouldnt want to create a misleading impression. Hes like a detective who room and announces one of the people in this room is a murderer now if youll excuse me, i have dinner reservations. laughter boo rif so, james comey, its not a cheering but i cant release what it is until after the election. And hillarys not the only politician who had a tough weekend. Remember Chris Christie . He sure wishes you did. laughter poor chris. Stephen once a big deal. He was one of 700 republican candidates who got beaten like a rented mule by trump. Then after christie dropped out, he became trumps lackey, standing awkwardly behind him at rallies, and even getting trumps mcdonalds orders. Of course, when you go get mcdonalds for trump, its not called a happy meal its called a sad meal, and, instead of a toy, it comes with laughter after all that, now its being reported that back in july trump offered christie his v. P. Slot, then rescinded the offer. Apparently, trump told christie he was in, but Trumps Campaign manager Paul Manafort didnt think christie was a good choice. He must have received a tip from anyone living in new jersey. laughter applause so manafort pulled off a daring bit of political espionage. During a Campaign Stop in indiana, manafort lied and said trumps plane needed repairs, forcing trump to spend an extra night in indianapolis, then manafort set up a meeting with mike pence. And the rest is history. Just like the republican party. Maybe. Who knows. Who knows. You dont know. You dont know. Those plane repairs are the second time a madeup transportation problem killed Chris Christies career. So, on top of being a campaign strategist, Paul Manafort is the quirky best friend in a romantic comedy who goes to elaborate lengths to make sure the couple meets. This november, keep your eyes out for my best friends vetting and the sequel youve got white male. Id watch that cheers and applause thats a good movie id watch that in a minute laughter now, all of this email stuff didnt get in the way of me watching the cubs this weekend. You guys watch the games this weekend . cheers and applause lost the first two at wrigley, but last night brought home the first winning World Series Game and as a fan of the cubs, i can tell you with confidence that they will not blow it tonight. laughter also, in football, the new you think football, thing with the pointy ends. A lot of fun. The Buffalo Bills right here on cbs, and there was some quite unusual unsportsmanlike conduct because someone threw a sex toy on the field in the middle of the game. Right by the end zone. Come on come on when your coach told you to leave it all on the field, this is not what he meant applause now, i cant tell you exactly what was thrown because, even though it originally broadcasted on cbs, they will not allow me but lets just say, if Bilbo Baggins had a d in his name instead of a b, youd have a pretty good idea, because its a bleep . applause it would totally change the lord of the rings, too. laughter thankfully, the referees disposed of the sex toy in accordanit regulations by kicking it off the field. laughter annnnd its goooood and weve got a good show for you tonight. When we return, ill be looking at Donald Trumps outreach to minority voters. So stick around. . . . One smart choice leads to the next. . The new 2017 ford fusion is here. Its the beauty of a wellmade choice. I thought my bladder leakage meant my social life was over. Wearing depend underwear has allowed me to fully engage in my life and im meeting people. Unlike the bargain brand, depend fitflex underwear is more flexible to move with you. Reconnect with the life youve been missing. The world is full of surprising moments. Theyre everywhere. And as a marriot rewards member, i can embrace them all. The new marriott portfolio of hotels now has 30 brands in over 110 countries. So no matter where you go, you are here. You wanna see something intense . Pantene expert gives you the most beautiful hair ever, with our strongest prov formula ever. Strong is beautiful. . Why get your eyes checked the Old Fashioned way, when lenscrafters can digitally map them for you. Introducing clarifye, cheers and applause . Stephen hey welcome back give it up for jon batiste and stay human jon you got it stephen i still got it, baby cheers and applause you know, folks, despite the the f. B. I. Email fr the polls. So donald trump needs every vote he can grab. Which is why his campaign has been reaching out to minority voters. Like this new ad targeting indianamerican voters. Before you watch part of it, i want you to know, we didnt edit this clip. This is really how it goes. . The indian and hindu friend in the white house. cheers and applause we will defeat radical islamic terrorism. I look forward to working with Prime Minister modi. Ab ki baar trump sarkaar. We love the hindus, we love india i am donald trump, and we approve this stephen wow. That is jarring, convoluted, and confusing. I guess whoever cuts his hair also cuts his ads. Not all his minority outreach is going that well. Check out a trump rally in North Carolina this weekend. We have a protester. By the way, were you paid 1,500 to be a thug . Wheres the protester . Where is he . Was he paid . Out. Stephen heres the deal that guy was a trump supporter. Proving that not even donald trump can believe he has a black supporter. cheers and applause okay . Okay. So heres the thing once again, that supposed thug that trump threw out of his rally was a man time trump supporter who was told by security he just wanted to give him a note. Now hes told, well move you to a separate but equal trump rally. This supporter did not let it discourage him. He said it was all fine and still plans on voting for trump. Common experience for trump black supporters. A donal trump rally in grand ra, michigan. Trump bupter bill farber, everybody cheers and applause thank you so much for being here. Thanks for having me stephen. Make America Great again stephen thanks, bill. Have you had the same kind of problems at trump rallies that c. J. Cary had . No, not at all, stephen. In fact, they treat me like a celebrity. People are always taking my picture. And i get all the free blacks for trump signs i can hold. Stephen so you havent been paid by democrats to disrupt this rally . No, im just here to offer my support and to give mr. Trump this letter. Ahhh stephen trump supporter bill farber, everybody. Well be right back with ruth wilson cheers and applause . Go, go [ rock music playing ] run away [ grunts ] leave him leave him [ music continues ] brick and mortar, what . [ music continues ] [ tires screech ] [ laughs ] [ doorbell rings ] when you bundle home and Auto Insurance with progressive, you get more than a big discount. Thats what you get for bundling home and auto jamie you get sneakygood coverage. Thanks. Were gonna live forever i struggle with bipolar depression, you get sneakygood coverage. Thanks. And its hard. See someone you love struggle. I miss out on lifes little moments. So i talked to my doctor and he prescribed latuda. There are many forms of depression. Latuda is fda approved to treat bipolar depression, which is different from other types of depression. In clinical studies, onceaday latuda was proven effective for many people struggling with bipolar depression. Latuda is not for everyone. And young adults. 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And use aveeno . Absolutely ageless . Night cream with active naturals . Blackberry complex. Younger looking skin can start today. Absolutely ageless . cheers and applause . Stephen welcome back, everybody. Folks, my first guest tonight is a golden globe winning actress and star of the affair on showtime. Please welcome ruth wilson cheers and applause . cheers and applause stephen thank you so much this is the scariest halloween pumpkin ive ever seen. I realize you dont have any stephen awful nice. It even has trumps tiny mouth and im surprised how big his stem is based on the size of his hands. laughter yeah stephen lets put it right here. I realize pumpkins, like humans, have on their bottom a hole. Stephen they do have a hole. Cbs is going to blur that, you suddenly, this suited the hole very well, if you know what i mean. Stephen thats where all his ideas come out of. Exactly. Stephen and you know, for those out there who dont have the keen ear that i do youre english. Very english. Stephen do they do halloween in england . We do. Its a little more cynical than here. Stephen what do you mean . We dont really get dressed stephen cut the eye holes out, sheets . We do a very lowkey version of it. My family and i were very cynical and used to play tricks on the trick or treaters. Stephen in america, the kids say trick or treat. No, we got to them first. Stephen preemptive strike. O me and my three brothers, once we pulled a hose out the top window of our house, turned on the garden ho time they came we would spray them with freezing cold water. Its mean. Its mean. laughter stephen youre a terrible person. Yeah. Stephen do your kids go out with your sacks and costumes and go around and get candy. Yeah. Stephen wha what kind of cay do you get over there . Harrow bow. Stephen what is that . Like turkish delight . Stephen everything sounds fancier. We want to be french. Stephen you hate the french. Nooget. What do you say . Stephen nugget. The part no one wants. Ill take it back with me. Stephen to england . Yes. Stephen so you would spray the children with water. Yes. Its not a dumb thing, its just our family. Particularly terrible. Yes. Mean. Stephen you got a new movie coming up called i am the pretty thing that lives in the house. A long title. Stephen it is a long title. Yes. Stephen its a spooky movie. Yeah, its a spooky movie. Stephen is it horrifying . Its fun. Its unusual. Its more like a poem. Its very still. Its like one chord being played. Stephen like the raven or movie. Stephen do you scare easy . Ometimes the dark scares me, creeky sounds. Sharks. Stephen there is a reason to be scared of sharks. No one has to say, like, do you believe in sharks . laughter true. Stephen ive got no proof sharks exist. Real things scare me. Stephen why to sniend. I think Stephen Speilberg did a service to me as a child. Stephen did you see jaws in a theater . I watched it at home and behind the couch. Stephen i watched it from outside the theater. Away from the screen. Stephen just tell me how it happens. Yeah. Stephen people do crazy things and do shark diving and things like that. I have been shark diving. Stephen what . It didnt work. I always think the shark might enter one of those flaps. Stephen the great whites . Yes, in south africa. Stephen what were you thinking . It was exhilarating. I do like being scared. I was in that cage and it was gnawing on the side of the cage and, yeah, it was very scary. Stephen do you know what he thought you were . Noogot noogot laughter there is a spooky movie here. Jim, lets show the spookiness. gasps oh. You scared me. applause seems like a very happy house youre living in there. Its very happy. Its sort of death. Stephen youve got kind of an odd affected voice in that. What are you doinge . Is that your spooky voice . It does sound spooky. Based on cinderella, actually. Stephen do you think of cinderella as a horror story . Yes. Stephen how so . He was trapped in a house. She has to clean. That for me is very scary. Shes got a horrible, scary stepmother. Stephen yes. I mean, and shes got a weird shes weird. And she sings. She has a very high voice. I thought, thats what im going to base this character on. Stephen cinderella . Yes, so i based the voice on cinderella. Stephen she sounds so innocent. Exactly, sounds so innocent, virg nail, but underneath, something is wrong. Stephen for a horrible surprise. Exactly. Stephen off movie called dark river coming up. Next year. Stephen you described it as the English Version of the revenent. Yes. Stephen do you fight a bear . No bears but i fight sheep. Stephen that is the English Version of the revenant theyre evil. They have horns, come at you, they dont care and theyre a bit stupid. laughter stephen theyre herbivores, though. Sheer him, make a nice sweater. Thank you so much for being here. applause stephen i am the pretty thing that lives in the house is on netflix. Ruth wilson, everybody well be right back with j. B. Smoove. cheers and applause f inflammation that contributes to both joint and skin symptoms. Its proven to help relieve pain, stop further joint damage, and clear skin in many adults. Humira is the number 1 prescribed biologic for psoriatic arthritis. Humira can lower your ability to fight infections, infections and cancers, including lymphoma, have happened, as have blood, liver, and nervous system problems, serious allergic reactions, and new or worsening heart failure. Be