>> the guy is happy. people are protesting and there is a crisis being created. he is being so happy. i think maybe the white house didn't want people to know he can be that happy. >> everything is happening according to plan. things are shopping up when things go -- things are showing up. jaime, haven't seen you in awhile. should obama have been dancing during the riots? >> i don't think so, but after seeing the pictures i don't think he should be dancing before them or after them either. >> i think it is a do about not that much. i think it is not that billing billing -- not that big of a deal. is it possible he misunderstood and somebody said in missouri they are hurling monthly to molotov cocktails and is it possible he said they are throwing cocktails and having a riot so let's do the same here. >> do you think the photographer was urged to take the picture down? >> i think so. and at some point, what do we want the president to do? be working on everything at all times? >> yes jie. that was just my -- >> yes. >> that was my question. >> you are welcome. >> that was the end of the thought. >> i appreciate you formulating half a thought and throwing it out there. >> by the way, greg, i have these things for the kids at home and this is an old ipad. if you were at a party with obama would you have posted a picture with him? >> you know what i would do. i would take a million selfies and he would great and i would post them all. i think it is interesting that we cannot fiend these photos. we cannot find these photographer comments, only in obama's america. >> he probably is dead. >> let's not go that far. >> he has been murdered. so joanne nosuchunsky has suggested that president obama had the photographer murdered. this is breaking news. after obama smashed the camera and had the photographer murdered according tone nosuchunsky, -- >> now you get my name right? >> when it counts. >> there is a reasonable explanation why this picture is gone. i talked to my sources in the obama administration and they said what happened was most people didn't notice this, but the entire internet crashed for a microsecond. when it came back everything was the same, but the picture was gone. it was a total accident. the administration is upset it happened, almost as upset as they were about the irs hard drives and nobody is angrier than pop. >> he will get -- than president obama. >> he will get to the bottom of it. >> i remember putting all of my clothes back on and check the breaker. expwhrie you -- >> you had to go back to using your imagination. >> what has happened? your brain goes flabby. you can't fantasize anymore. >> it is technology. >> i don't use my brain anymore. i let siri do it. >> when i am talking for a girl and she doesn't ask for my credit card right away. >> when i am looking at a live girl i assume something is popping up in front of me. >> isn't that what is supposed to happen? >> why does it always have to go down that road? this is a family show. it is just like the brady bunch. >> i think the photographer chose to remove the picture. she is not a professional political person. she got a lot of attention. it had been regramed and it is not like deleting it meant people wouldn't see it. >> thank you for defending her. >> absolutely. >> they wouldn't have done this with george bush. >> at least i didn't refer to her as he. i am so far above. i don't see humanity. >> i agree with that. >> i don't even know what a human is. i have been explaining that to authorities for months. they are venting about vending. as kids return to school they are finding a change and it is the new vending machines with healthier snacks and drinks. the teens are not pleased. one louisiana girl tweeted healthy snacks in the vending machines at school, seriously? thanks obama. another claims michelle obama single handedly took my school lunch and the vending machine. and a lad from atlanta says how about michelle obama quit worrying about the vending machines and start worrying about the lunches. obviously it is time to get down with the kids in another edition of -- >> welcome to teen corner with greg gutfeld. as always after the show i will be meeting all of the teens back in my tree house, and as always everything that will happen there will be our own little secret. susan, whose side are you on? you are into health, aren't you? >> but i have a teen. my teen very successfully started a sales market program and i didn't have ts give him an allowance anymore. >> he is learning entrepreneurial ship too? >> he is like a radical. she a radical capitalist. >> believe me, this boy was listening to the ramones when he was 2. >> that is a good kid. by the way, a 10-year anniversary coming up for johnny ramone next sunday. just thought i would throw that a out. game me, thanks for joining us -- jaime, thanks for joining us on teen corner. you were once electrocuted on stage. he was electrocuted so you can get past anything. how would you combat childhood obesity? >> i have a really good idea. what i would do is not change the junk foods into the healthy foods in the vending machines. i would put them in a room with a very thin entryway. if you can get in here go ahead and have one. i know you are thinking there are problems because what if somebody can't get out? that's as far as i have gotten with it. >> you know what, that works. >> and they are actually saying to get series for a minute, michelle obama's campaign moved so poorly that it is not working right. they are thinking of calling it let's move to canada. >> let's move is directed more at the intestinal part of the body than the actual exercise. i could be wrong. that just fell flat you counsel a lot of teens what advice do you give them? >> a lot of times when you think you can't even, you really can even. and i will tell them that. >> i can't. >> no you can. >> no offense to these kids, but they are kids and they will complain about being forced to eat healthy things. i am the last person who should be saying this. >> i am an adult and i can choose to do that. they are kids and they can not choose for themselves. they are not allowed to legally. >> you can't eat paint chips every morning. >> again, i can and they can't. >> that's bad for your skin. joe app, one -- joanne, one kentucky school district is dropping the program altogether. can you give us the 4-1-1? >> basically these kids were not eating the food. they were throwing most of it out. it was so wasteful. the school district is well off enough that they candy klein the federal money. unfortunately other schools are not as fortunate and they rely on that money to feed these kids who get the cheap lunch or free lunch program. these kids were not at all being over dramatic. let's just say that first. they speak the truth. however, how will they learn healthy choices if they are not provided a choice? when they leave school that's when the real choices come and then they won't know how to make the healthy decisions if they are not given the opportunity to learn. >> i am the guy that drives up in my van full of sweets. it is like, here, this is what i have got. >> i am with -- i am behind him with a van full of healthy treats. >> it is lose-lose. >> you and i grew up in the same generation. we didn't have these options. if you went to a mcdonalds in like 1970 there were three things. there were burger, frys and shakes. there was a fillet-o-fish. >> and everything was the same size. >> i feel bad for these kids because there are thousands of things you can eat now that we didn't have. it is like the space program of junk food. yeah but look at the results. >> look at the results, suzanne or susan or cindy. are you making candy puppy poop. this by the way is chocolate candy that is shaped like dog and cat poop. >> and people can eat it? >> boys and girls, if you are going to eat crap, let it be mine. jim norton says that a lot. do i have time for this story? only perverts got that joke. they are cracking down on creeps. they are cracking down on policies after robin williams daughter. she twreeted and got disgusting replies of doctored photos of his death and accusations that she was responsible. she quit twitter and the social media site said the company's vp of trusted safety said, quote, we will not tolerate abuse. we are in the process of how we can go further to improve us on policies to avoid situations like this one. twitter has not announced any plans. are you happy that twitter didn't exist when you were a young star? >> oh my gosh or cell phones. i wouldn't have had a decent life if i had to keep looking around and minding my manners and stop doing drugs. >> when did you start doing drugs? >> technically it was the first time i had oral surgery and i thought, wow this is what they were talking about. i can't wait to get into high school. i can do more. >> i was going to link it to the disappearance of tiger. >> no, alice made thai food. >> that's terrible. >> jaime, what do you think of twitter's reaction to this incident? >> honestly, this story overall made me sad that there is actually people that would do something like that. it surprised me to tell you the truth. >> how can you be surprised? people say horrible things on twitter. i say things to you that are worse. >> but this to me i was still surprised. this is the worst of the worst easy have ever seen. >> what should they do? well i don't know. i almost think is this -- i don't want to get in trouble for this, but can we take away somebody's freedom of speech if they prove no not to be a human being? can we take away twitter? what i thought was interesting about the statement was it was so long they had to put it on facebook. >> joanne, what are your thoughts on this? >> out of sight, out of mind. it is best to block these people completely. she did delete the app. she could be a role model to people who have gone through the same a thing and dealt with depression. it is sad she is no longer the voice for them. i just don't know how twitter will implement this. apart from vulgarity or actual cuss words how will you prove if someone is harassing you you? isn't it all a matter of perspective? >> twitter will do something if somebody threat tens your life. that's what i -- threatens your life. that's what i noticed after i threatened your life and they had somebody visit me. it is also proof that we can't have nice things. >> the problem is twitter can do something about it. they can take away their twitter account. twitter can take away your freedom of speech. >> that's what i meant. >> if twitter wants you off, you are off. i don't know how you stop it before it happens. i don't know how they could change the harassment policies to stop it from happening in the first place. >> "minority report" with tom cruise. so you have them killed is what you are saying? >> if you have all people say between the ages of 18 -- no 12 and 25, if you kill them all, that's probably most of them. >> i am almost 26. can we implement this in like a month. >> 12 to 27. you can kick them off once they put it on there, but she saw it. they booted them off, but she already saw it. >> my only bright spot to this is if somebody is doing something horrible on twitter they are probably not doing something horrible somewhere else. at least they are in a room and pressing a button rather than, i don't know, off on the street. >> the zodiac killer left notes, greg. >> he could multi task. >> i want to say i hate twitter because i have never gone on there and seen something awesome. it makes me sad. i had a girl turn around and ask me to unfollow her. >> after that millionth message you sent her, that might be why. >> trying to be nice. >> i win first place in a greg gutfeld look alike contest. the 10 grand will go toward a boat made of chocolate. can you guess which one it is going to be? going to be? it is not marcia or jan. when you run a business, you can't settle for slow. that's why i always choose the fastest intern. the fastest printer. the fastest lunch. turkey club. the fastest pencil sharpener. the fastest elevator. the fastest speed dial. the fastest office plant. so why wouldn't i choose the fastest wifi? i would. switch to comcast business internet and get the fastest wifi included. comcast business. built for business. about? that's not exactly a crime. >> a secret is a secret. >> i did not say a word. >> anyone for dinner? >> if i wanted to tell you know who about you know what i would have told you know who myself. >> rap scalion. the show that tackles everything imaginable. i never missed an episode. i must have seen it 20 times. "the brady bunch" lasted five seasons, but much like the rash on my back the lessons stuck with you forever. as cindy brady, susan olson, inspired me to get curls of my own. she has been kind to join us all night. let's ask her about all things brady bunch. friday night for me was a ritual. it was a ritual for millions of kids. you had the brady bunch and partridge family. >> "the odd couple." "love american style." >> that was for perverts. i didn't understand what adults were doing when they went into a room. i never got that. >> i didn't either and we shot on the same lot. i used to see that brass bed and all of these different -- in all of these places and i thought what is the thing with the bed? >> you see a shirtless dick gottiet. the types of people on that show -- >> stephanie powers. >> they were always in the second or third tier of acting jie. karen balance ballentine. >> joanne flube. i could do this forever. but i won't. this is a very moral show. i remember the jesse james episode and that was when bobby idolized a killer. i used that in my book "not cool." this show had a point of view. >> yes the things could be applied to many situations. the jesse james thing, you know, you made that clear to me with your book which i of course have, and i think that is something that is going on a lot. we have a lot of bobby brady glorifying jesse james. i could be more animated. >> what -- who is your favorite brady? >> tiger. >> why did tiger disappear? what happened to tiger? >> one of them was hit by a truck. they got a look alike, but he didn't know how to act, so they actually had to nail his collar to the floor. then we -- we got the last tiger -- >> you can't say that and move on. >> you are scarring all of us. >> is that how you work with animals now? >> i so they nailed his collar. >> the collar. not him. it was so he stayed still while the boys said goodbye because it was tiger's big episode. it was a terrible time to get hit by a truck. >> this also happened to peter, right? he was hit by a truck and he was replaced with a look alike brother. were there three brothers? >> two. one appeared in "the kelly kids." >> that was a spinoff. this was toward the end of "the brayey bunch." before i go further. >> did they nail mike to the floor too? >> sometimes. >> have i to bring out -- i have to bring out the most interesting element and that is cousin oliver. do you keep in touch with him? >> absolutely. he is at "brady bunch" convention right now. he did the music for "sharknado." >> was he in a punk band? >> many punk bands. he has been in four or five bands. >> a lot of young child stars, brandon cruz, kennedy's? >> very good. >> what brady did you not get along with? or are there too many to mention? >> you know, i hate to admit this, but we were sickeningly sweet and good and nice and loved each other. >> who was your favorite celebrity that came on? there was joe name math and davy jones and vincent price. that was in hawaii. >> yes. i really liked imogene-coca. she was so shy in real life. she could barely talk to you. and then the cameras would role and she was brilliant. >> that's what they say about a lot. i am great and animated and put the camera on me -- >> was robert reid nice? >> wonderful fella. wonderful. he was like a father to us. >> he was like a father. >> he took us all to england. >> really? that's amazing. my dad never did that. >> is that a euphemism? jay andy uknow what -- >> andy, you know what, sit out there and shut up. this is one of my favorite episodes. can we roll this? >> ♪ when it's time to change ♪ you've got to rearrange ♪ move your heart ♪ into what you are gonna be ♪ ♪ sha-na-na-na >> you know what i like about any musical thing in a show is everybody else watching and going leak this. don't you see that where they look at the drums and somebody would be like smiling. >> they are supposed to be singing. >> did the music take off? were you called the silver platters? >> we were called the brady kids and we went on tour believe it or not. >> you had another song called "sunshine days" and that was a beautiful song. i think we have five seconds. >> ♪ sunshine day ♪ everybody sing ♪ the happy days ♪ it's a sunshine day >> you had a cartoon, right? >> yes, we did. "the brady kids." >> was it weird seeing a cartoon version of yourself? >> i started doing this when i was -- >> your whole childhood was weird. >> hey, more weirdness, great. >> how was post brady bunch life? you seem normal. >> yeah, well i think i am responsible for it getting canceled because i really wanted it to. i was so happy that cousin oliver came on and jinxed the whole show. i was hitting puberty and it was bad enough to do it in the privacy of your own home. i just wanted a special episode about cindy. >> cindy comes home from school to change her pants. what are you talking about? people have dirty minds. >> exactly. you get it. >> because there was a food fight. there was a food fight. >> there is another imaginary friend and it is not george glass. >> that's funny. the george glass episode. was jan as weird as her charkt a ter? >> no, no. very sophisticated and very funny. you would love her. she is great. >> we have had greg. we have had peter. we have to find eve somewhere. >> bobbie. >> the brady bunch convention is the meadowlands? >> yes jie. where is that? >> new jersey and tomorrow and sunday as well. >> everybody will be there? >> well not the two girls. not the parents. okay it is just me. it is chris and barry and mike. and robbie who played cousin oliver and some of the people from the movie. >> wow. we have to go. that was great though. you have to check it out "brady bunch" probably the greatest show ever. that includes "gilligan's island". we'll be back. know duct tape is not always great for skin. >> believe me. >> i was a little concerned about the baby's skin on that one. >> if you rip it off, oh it hurts for days. >> you have to put powder underneath. it leaves telltale marks. >> the creepier picture was her feeding milk to a roast. >> that was disgusting. i like what you did there. might want to write that down on a card. here is the difference. there are certain people that don't know how facebook works. young people and old people. young people ruin their lives. old people it doesn't matter. >> she was a grandma. she wasn't that old. >> she was a young grandma. what do you call those? >> young grandmas. >> young mas. >> guilt? >> you are disgusting. >> i thought i had the right answer. >> you get nothing for that. >> burger king is ditching its lower calorie french fries after less than a year. last september the fast-food giant introduced satisfries the worst name for anything invented which cost about 30 cents more than an order of regular fries, but they never caught on fire. and now a third bk at restaurants in north america have opted to continue selling them as a permanent item. the fans of satisfries are taking it hard. let's pause to remember the satisfries. >> is that a real tragedy? do you remember where you were when you first heard the news? >> i didn't know until i got on the show. >> we wanted an authentic surprise. who will buy diet frys at burger king? >> me. lots. that's me and my son's favorite thing. >> was it? >> we loved them. we loved them better than the regular ones. >> you may be only person on the planet that says that. >> we are unique. >> you are. are you surprised people didn't like the satisfries? >> this whole thing is uns atifractory. >> it says keep going, jaime, you are doing a great job. >> i think this is ridiculous for what you said. no one is going to burger king because they care about their health so why try to fix it? my solution if i ran a burger king, instead of giving say a six-ounce burger with a whopper and cheese, instead of cheese the person would get a whopper with directions to chipotle and then they could eat healthier. >> exactly. >> anne, was the problem bad marketing? they could have called it frys light or light frys. >> and it is a business. if it is not making money they will get rid of it. they bought back their chicken frys which i will never understand. that's what the people want. a chicken shaped like a fry. very natural. the last thing you want to be when you go into a fast-food restaurant is the bad disetion. the healthier version is no frys. just get the burger. >> i like when they make the chicken nuggets into a shape of a chicken head like it will make it more wonderful. >> it is more authentic. >> oh i got the head. look i think i got a foot. >> oh martha. >> i was having lunch with martha washington. >> martha mccown. >> her name is marcia. andy, you enjoy fr from -- fromo time. how does it change your opinion? >> i was all for it except there was no way i was going to walk into a burger king and say satisfries. >> nobody wanted to embarrass themselves by saying it. that's the reason they failed. bring them back and rebrand them and give it another shot. >> but it is like going to a strip club 230r -- for a sermon. >> it is like a strip club and a turtle neck. >> you want to keep going with this? go to a strip club and order a steak. >> actually -- >> you do that, don't you? >> the steak is not very good. steaks at strip clubs are terrible. you always find a a long hair. >> a strip steak. >> nothing is at good -- nothing is as good as the all you can eat buffet at the strip club. we held our meetings there. >> did your daughter do porn? then this story is for you. "mott --" not cool" order it. they must be thrilled about that. i don't like you anymore. would you look down with scorn if your daughter about porn? it is the subject of tonight's. >> "red eye" ... bait -- "red eye eye" debate, live from the" red eye" debate center. >> as always your ticket stub from tonight's debate is good for a free car at any dealership. great job who ever worked that deal. anyway, a writer at week.com points out that our views about morality are changing. we are seeing greater acceptance of gay marriage and pot use and less judgmental in general about sex. but they say there is an exception when it comes to porn. we may see we accept it morally, but in fact we don't. to prove it he asks, how would you feel if duke porn star was your daughter? he maintains every honest person will admit to be appalled at that thought. you were once mistaken for being a porn star. am i right? >> yes. >> how did that happen? >> apparently there was a girl who looked a lot like me in a film that was widely distributed during the original persian golf crisis. it was called "crocodile blondie" and when i saw the cover of the film she was gorgeous. i decided let's keep it going. i actually did do a small job in a porn film. i grew up in the san fernando valley. "boogie nights." >> did you do that? >> no i was in the real deal. i provided space ship sound effects for "love probe from the planet." >> you were a porn star. >> i got 50 bucks for it. cross that off the bucket list. >> well it rhymes with bucket. jaime, you have kids. what if one day they ended up in porn? >> it would upset me more if my daughter was a porn star was if she was a porn extra. i would have to say that now that i do have a dare -- a daughter, it is weird. every time -- i am not -- seriously i am not into that kind of thing, but if i ever come across it, i always think, oh my god that is someone's daughter. then i think i should try to find that lady's porn. that is more age appropriate. it would be a struggle, right? it would be the balance between the -- being ashamed and being embarrassed and combined with the. >> of not having to pay for college. >> that's true. you don't have to worry about the mortgage. i would rather have my daughter be a doctor or astronomer or at least play one in a porn movie, right? >> definitely. you have to reach for the large parts. >> which is what happens. >> what? no. hey! >> and another one. >> we are running out of time. >> you always imagine the best for your child, right? a career in porn means that your health and reputation is at risk. and then the con veer -- the conversations that happen at the y, you know, or the looks you get from the people at the country club, oh your daughter, what is she up to these days? they are asking, but they know and you don't want to deal with that. glad i wasted half of my [bleep] day prepping for this story. story. we when you run a business, you can't settle for slow. that's why i always choose the fastest intern. the fastest printer. the fastest lunch. turkey club. the fastest pencil sharpener. the fastest elevator. the fastest speed dial. the fastest office plant. so why wouldn't i choose the fastest wifi? i would. switch to comcast business internet and get the fastest wifi included. comcast business. built for business. last story. that's the last story. >> school is starting and in roughly three to six months. there is nothing i like more than rapp nie g with teens. -- rapping with teens. let's talk about it in another edition of -- "17 magazine" has put together a list of struggles. you realize many of your friends have the same lunch period and you pick your outfit the nate before, but when you wake up it is not right. you run into the crush you had or the summer fling and you have been sweating for 30 minutes in the gym. stuff like that. since i cut you off, you were a teen at one time. do you have nuggets of advice? >> i want to talk about the story from the last block. i thought it was a dumb story. the a authorize of the -- the author of the piece makes a mess stake. a mistake. i wouldn't want a daughter going into porn and i wouldn't want her to do heroin, but i don't see the point of the piece. the fact that they used hash tags after each one made me vomit. >> it wasn't even on twitter. >> was there anything left off the list? >> yeah, being concerned about how many new kids would be at school. they would be teasing you because you were on a tv show. >> that's right. you probably got teased a lot. oh man that must have been hard. they were richer than they were. >> this story jarred a terrible memory. i remember this one time we had a gym teacher and i was going to the bathroom at a urinal. the gym teacher came in and you know which one he used? the same one as me. >> that is not funny. >> did you go to penn state? >> do you have any similar sprenses? dash cash -- experiences? >> unable to pronounce names. was that a problem for you? >> i couldn't do my own. it wasn't until second grade i could say my own name and spell it. freshman year i was in a new town and the only one with a back brace so the struggle was year. >> you had a back brace for your first year? >> four years. had to wear it six teen hours a day -- 16 hours a day. >> no way. >> but look at me now. >> are you on "red eye." what is wrong with you? >> well that was fun. go to the brady bunch convention this weekend. it is at the meadowlands. susan is going to be there. she is awesome and she will be back on "red eye" when she is back in town. if she won't i will stalk her down until she disappears like the kid. the kid. i'm greg gutfeld and i will if you're suffering from constipation or irregularity, powders may take days to work. for gentle overnight relief, try dulcolax laxative tablets. ducolax provides gentle overnight relief, unlike miralax that can take up to 3 days. dulcolax, for relief you can count on. protestors go home. we'll watch it, huckabee starts right now. >> tonight on huckabee, a week of chaos in ferguson, missouri as police clash with protestors and across the country cops are looking and acting more like soldiers. the militarization of police in america. tragedy on the race track. 20-year-old kevin ward junior struck and hit by stewart. >> it is the culture of car racing and that is a eye for eye culture. >> the governor responds tonight. >> and iraq's