Larry got to be careful. This stuff happens. Lets check in with the efforts to pale up the presidency. Its time for the unblackening. cheers and applause future impeached President Donald Trump has resonated with a great Many Americans because they believe hes not a politician. They liked him initially because he said things without caring what people think, but now that hes close to the presidency, hes evolved to the point where he says things without caring to think. Take mr. Trumps recent remarks to the n. R. A. In which he detailed his opposition to gun control. Trump the only way to save our Second Amendment is to vote for a person that you all know named donald trump, okay . I will tell you. cheers and applause i will never let you down. I will protect our Second Amendment. Larry okay, so trump is a gun guy, which makes sense. Hes a republican candidate, thats what theyre supposed to say. If you want this gun, youre going to have to pry it from his cold, dead, tiny tiny tiny tiny tiny tiny tiny small hands. cheers and applause actually, it would be pretty easy to take it from him. But its not quite what he said 16 years ago. Reporter trump hasnt always sided with the n. R. A. On gun policies. In 2000, his book the america we deserve, trump wrote, i support the ban on assault weapons and a slightly longer waiting period to purchase a gun. Two positions he now opposes. Larry but then maybe he could have evolved. 16 years is a long time. I think weve burned through 11 doctors who in that time. So a lot can happen, things can change. I understand. But when trump was discussing his stance on guns, on fox friends, he amazingly switched positions midsentence. Trump i dont want to have guns in classrooms, although, in some cases, teachers should have guns in classrooms. audience reacts larry i i i laughter okay. Its one thing if your two positions are separated by years of deep reflection. But if only thing that separated trumps diverging positions on teachers packing heat was a bleep comma. Thats unbelievable. Its as if f. D. R. Said i the only thing we have to fear is fear itself oh and hitler hes going to kill us all laughter larry they really dont play the rest of that. To help us understand what he truly believes on guns, please welcome donald trump. cheers and applause so you can see what theres a big question out there about your true progun credentials. You seem to have changed positions a lot over the years. Trump ive never changed positions. Have some of my positions been changed . Yes. By me . Obviously. But i dont change positions. I take bad positions and make them great again. Larry what . you just changed position on whether or not you change positions trump excuse me. Excuse me. I only have one true position. One. To put my name on stuff and make money. I have been very consistent about that. Speaking of which cue the music and bring out the babes. Where are the babes . Larry oh, my god. Trump oh, god. These broads are so hot, i absolutely agree. Any which one of them could be my fourth wife. Maybe fourth and fifth. I havent been this turned on since i danced with my daughter ivanka at her wedding. Larry okay, thats horrible what are you doing . why are those women out there . Im introducing for the first time trump guns made with actual gold melted down from the signs of the luxurious trump university, may it rest in peace. Larry you cant run for president and sell guns. What are you going to do . Sell them on the black market . Trump excuse me. Excuse me. So now the black market is a bad thing . I mean, cmon. Try telling that to tyler perry. I mean, cmon, who the hell else is gonna see his awful movies . And they really are terrible. This guys a disaster. Larry fine, fine, whatever. Im not here to defend tyler perry, but you cant be serious about this. Trump and speaking of black market, id like to introduce the trump nine millimeter for the blacks. Larry for the blacks trump perfect for holding sideways and lightweight enough to holster on saggy jeans. Beautiful, beautiful. Larry thats wrong on so many levels. cheers and applause i dont know even know where to start also, thats not what the black market means trump look, semantics, ebonics, whatever. Look, america loves guns, larry, and they love trump. Im just giving them what they want. Speaking of which the trump assault rifle. Larry okay. What is that for . Trump common, larry. Americans are going to need something to protect them from the blacks carrying that gun. cheers and applause larry you are a horrible monster this is going to be a best certainly, believe me. Believe me. cheers and applause because, look, youre not a teacher, okay . Teachers do not need guns, but they do need guns. Thats all im saying, if im going to be honest with you, okay . Larry youre never honest with anyone donald trump, everyone. We the eclass has 11 intelligent driverassist systems. It recognizes pedestrians and alerts you. Warns you about incoming crosstraffic. Cameras and radar detect dangers you dont. And it can even stop by itself. So in this crash test, one things missing a crash. The 2016 eclass. Lease the e350 for 499 a month at your local mercedesbenz dealer. Yea, thats my daughter, my son, and thats my. Hey, koolaid man . Husband. Oh yeah [ crashing ] [ electricity crackles ] hey at least you got your Homeowners Insurance through progressive. By bundling it with your Car Insurance you saved a ton yeah. Do you want to see the rest of the house . I can actually see a lot of it. Oh. When our troops dont come back, someone has to help their families move forward. My family lost so much. It was a shock. It was a void. Special Operations Warrior Foundation was there for me. Without special Operations Warrior Foundation, i dont know how we would all afford to go to college. Now through july 31st, a portion of each sale of specially marked cherry extra strength 5hour energy® shots benefits the special Operations Warrior Foundation. We hope you will join the fight. This is your daughter. And she just got this. Ooh boy. But, youve got hum. So you can set this. And if she drives like this, you can tell her to drive more like this. Because youll get this. You can even set boundaries for so if she should be here, but instead goes here, here, or here. Youll know. So dont worry, mom. Because you put this, in here. Hum by verizon. The technology designed to make your car smarter, safer and more connected. Put some smarts in your car. You know we want to have kids some day. So when we bought a place, we specifically looked for a house that could accommodate that. In a couple years, its gonna be a trip to see my kid runnin around, playing with some toys, knowing that hes got a home like i did when i grew up. Thats gonna be an awesome day. Whatever home means to you, well help you find it. Zillow. cheers and applause larry okay welcome back harriet tubman, eleanor roosevelt, the blonde one from two broke girls. The story of america is the story of bold, courageous women. And whenever a woman takes a noble, brave stand, the nightly show contributes, robin and holly, salute her with their thats what she said awards. Thats what she said robin if you think our federal lawmakers are embarrassing, theyre nothing compared to crazy state reps. Holly take a look at a new amendment proposed by louisiana representative kenny havard last week. a lawmaker offered an amendment to a Human Trafficking bill that said strippers shouldnt be too old or too heavy. Harvard i have put an age limitation on it of no more than 28 years of age and shall be no more than 160 pounds. And ill take any questions. Robin hey, ive got a question. Howd you get to be such a dick . cheers and applause holly but this weeks thats what she said Award Recipient boldly exclaimed, im not gonna take this lying down robin thats what she said. Sorry. I couldnt help it. Holly thats okay. Ladies and gentlemen, meet representative julie stokes. Stokes i gotta say looking out over this body, ive never been more repulsed to be a part of it. I hear derogatory comments about women in this place regularly. I hear and i see women get treated differently than men, and im gonna tell you what, you gave me a perfect forum to talk about it right now cuz it has got to stop. That was utterly disrespectful and disgusting. Holly bravo larry yeah, right some cheers and applause bravo getting up in front of everybody like that . Thats really hard. Robin thats what she said. Holly in my opinion, if representative havard is seeking reelection, he should pull out now. laughter robin thats what she said. Im sorry. Im really sorry. Holly im trying to do this story. Robin i know. I wont open my mouth. Thats what she said. Sorry, that was for me la laughter holly this representative should step down now, even though a Midterm Election would leave a big hole to fill. laughter applause what . Larry its just that you said a big hole to fill and thats exactly what she would say. Holly can i finish . Robin through teeth thats what she said. applause holly no, seriously can you just stop it . were trying to give this woman her due, and you keep saying thats what she said, i get it, thats the joke but enough robin okay. Youre right. Thats why representative julie stokes for standing up and saying what needed to be said for all the ladies, were proud to present you with our first ever thats what she said award cheers and applause larry all right yes great job, ladies that was huge. Robin and holly uh no. Were not playing that game. Larry i thought we were doing the thing . Oh, forget it. Holly walker and robin thede, everybody. Were coming right back. cheers and applause aha cinnamon. Milk. Cinnamilk. Cinnamon toast crunch. Crunch crave those crazy squares. Cinnamilk ri thought i needed ed cigarettes to cope. I was able to quit smoking. And then i started running. Now, i feel a lot better. announcer you can quit for free help, call 1800quitnow. I would like three two is standard. Im not standard. Three weeks. Ok. Larry okay, welcome back im here with my panel. First up, the nightly show contributor rory albanese. The nightly show contributor grace parra. And you can see her along with our own grace parra in the next Live Performance of their show called lady freak, saturday, june 11th, 10 00 p. M. , at the ucb on franklin, in los angeles, actress, jen bartles. cheers and applause and for everyone at home, join our conversation right now on twitter nightlyshow using tonightly. There is a show called lady freak. There is an issue you talked about the other night. Theres been a flurry of Media Attention regarding the legalization of prostitution in new york city and across america. Its on fire no one specific. Larry so, let me just ask you, should this be legal . I was saying, yeah, get that nut and that Health Insurance laughter but we learned by talking to a series of sex workers that the ideal situation is decriminalization not legalization. Larry what is the difference . The thing with decriminalization is it allows the workers to feel safe, to have a place if there is a crime committed. If something happens and youre going down on that d dont go to a cop. Or doctor in some cases. Larry if youre on a d you should not be going to a cop. But it might be a cop. laughter but i think legalization is almost creating a sense of regularization and making it big corporate institutions. It places the power and money in the hands of pimps and brothel keepers and not the hands of sex workers, and the idea is for sex workers to have control over their own money. Larry you say sex worker, how do you feel . Sex workers, feels more like theyre hookers and i look at the crowd and theyre, like, whoa thats a crime. That would be like bank robbers being like, no, were money relocaters. Larry we dont like the cozy terms. The terms prostitutes versus whores, they take the word back. Some sews, theyre like, whore, whore, whore, and youre not al youre not allowed to say it unless youre a whore. Everybodys been a whore, had a late night in college and had a sushi date larry do you think its becoming more acceptable, the profession . I think so. Larry i think porns gotten so mainstream. Everybodys talking about it and doing it. With drugs and sex we have to admit people are doing it. Dont deny that its happening. applause i love our audience. Drugs and whores, yeah cheers and applause larry i feel like in new york, man, its just a slippery slope in new york. Thats what she said laughter honestly, we couldnt handle crow nuts, you know what i mean . We kill each other over crow nuts. I was, like, oh, we had a crow nut bleep . No, that is a create term for a bad penis. Larry let me ask you this, would you feel cool about someone in your family being a sex worker . This is where i have a double standard. My fivefoottwo sister, if she says i want to try, that would be a definite no go, because there are no laws to protect. If my uncle ed said, i want to do it, cool, youre sixtwo and can take care of yourself. If someone in my family did it, whatever, but i would definitely make fun of them. I reserve the right. You know, if one of my cousins became a sex worker, and youre at a wedding, youre going to take some bleep . I would ask them to get a pseudonym. I would be chase chara. You would never know its me. It sounds like a little crappy bank. I dont go to the big chase, i go to chase chara. I like coming up with names. Whats yours. Dr. Dongstein. laughter whats yours . Larry i guess it would be the nightly show. Right larry see how i did that . Any comment, whenever there are political conventions, especially republicans, the incidents of se sex workers skyrockets. You know what it is, and this is not jokey mcjokeerson here also a great sex worker name. Thank you, mom. laughter politicians go into the conventions wanting escorts because you want discretion. Theyre some of the most suppressed people. Every day i tell my lies. When im in tampa this week, all hell breaks loose. It always happens. Eliot spitzer was against prostitution and the whole time hes doing it. Thats how you know, when people are against gay marriage, right, we know what youre doing. The people most against it have the most skeletons in their closet. All them bones. Well be right back. cheers and applause if you live in the new york city area or planning to visit, grab free tickets to the upcoming take of the nightly show. Go to the thenightlyshow. Com tickets. engine winding up pilot talking to tower on radio once you get out here. Theres just one direction. Forward. One time now. And theres just one sound. You and us. Together. Telling the world. Were coming for you. Tmom didnt want another dog. She said its too much work. Lulus hair just floats. Uhh help me doorbell mom, check this out. Wow. Swiffer sweeper, and dusters. This is what im talking about. Look at that. Sticks to this better than it sticks to lulu. Thats your hair lulu mom, can we have another dog . laughing trap and lock up to 4x more dirt, dust and hair than the store brand stop cleaning. Start swiffer ing theres no one no one surface. E. No one speed. No one way of driving on each and every road. But there is one car that can conquer them all. The mercedesbenz cclass. Five driving modes let you customize the steering, shift points, and suspension to fit the mood youre in. And the road youre on. The 2016 cclass. Lease the c300 for 359 a month at your local mercedesbenz dealer. cheers and applause larry thanks to my panelists rory albanese, grace parra and jen bartels. And thanks to bob dibuono as donald trump for being here. Thanks for watching goodnightly, everyone cheers and applause captioning sponsored by Comedy Central captioning sponsored by Comedy Central captioned by Media Access Group at wgbh access. Wgbh. Org from cy centrals world news from cy headquarters in new york, this is the daily show with trevor noah. cheers and applause trevor welcome to the daily shoarks everybody am im trevor noah. Thank you so much for tuning in rose byrne is joining us, people, rose byrne is here, but, but, we begin this weekends news from pakistan. Confirmation today that the leader of the taliban was killed this weekend in a u. S. Drone strike. One of those killed was taliban leader mullah akhtar mansour. The u. S. Says it pakistan denies that and accusing the u. S. Of violating its sovereignty. Trevor thats right, taliban. If you play with fire, you get taliburnt. Oh, you thought the u. S. Forgot about you because of the whole isis thing . Well, jokes on you. Because isis was just a dei could the entire time, bitches. Yeah, great work, boys, well done, well done on that, they fell for it they time to shut it down. Shut it down. Enjoy your summer break. Wouldnt that be the weirdest scam ever in history . You know what is strange about the story, its really weird, that pakistan dnt care that americas using drones. They just wants the heads up. That saul theyre saying. And the u. S. Is saying to pakistan, we towld. And pakistan is like no, you didnt, you didnt. The u. S. Is like the worst which friend ever. They dont say anything but just show up and [bleep] sorry babe, i thought i definitely texted you. And pakistan is like well, we didnt get the text. We didnt get the text. America is like no, look for yourself, heads up, gunner bomb emoji taliban guy. And pakistan is like that wasnt to pakistan, look, it says patricia. Whos patricia. An theyre like ah, [bleep]. So coming back to the u. S. , you know, so much, so much has happened this campaign season. I mean between finding out ted cruzs dad killed kennedy, john kasich struggle with tape worm. Well, partnership with tape worm, i should say. And that whole jeb bush wedgie incident. I mean there was a time we thought that would be the biggest moments in the race. None of us remember it now, you can remember . No, we all forgot it. It similar with Chris Christie because we forgot, it was only a few months ago that the new jersey governor slashed sopranos extra was still running for president. Now by the end of his campaign he had blazed through 8. 1 Million Dollars and was hundreds of thousands in debt. So chris ye spent millions of dollars and didnt get out of jersey, or as they call it the reverse springsteen. So after dropping out he endorsed donald trump which seems normal now. But at the time, the announcement had people reacting like this. Chris yis c. E. O. Chris ye shocks the political world by endorsing the frontrunner. The biggest high profile endorsement that trump has received. A jawdropping endorsement. Isnt shk waves throughout the Republican Party and beyond. Yeah, that is the top rated news broadcast in india. It is not. It is just a joke. So though, because thats not india. I get t calm down. So for several days everyone in politics was in shock including Chris Christie. Look at that face. Look at that face. That is the kind of face you make when you are trying to remember if you used a condom last night. That is the look you have and if you did, which side of it were you on. That is the look that he has. So everyone was wondering why Chris Christie would do such a thing. But people always forget that when you sell your soul to the devil, are you still getting something in return. And last thursday we found out what that was. Donald trump in Central New Jersey at a fundraiser in lawrenceville for governor christie. A 200 per person event was designed to pay you have christies 200,000 debt from his failed president ial run. You know, chris paid off his entire Campaign Debt tonight, right . His entire debt. Trevor yeah we did it we did it i mean we could have given that money to are chaity, but lets be honest, christie is the real tragedy here, come on. Yeah, there is probably kids in africa going no, no, i know me, but have you seen his face, give him the moneyment i will wait for next time. I will wait for next time. So yes, trump helped wipe out chris yes debt in just one