2014. from comedy central world headquarters in new york, this is "the daily show" with jon stewart! (cheers and applause) captioning sponsored by comedy central >> jon: hey! welcome to "the daily show"! i'm jon stewart. good, good show tonight. my guest tonight, former white house chief technical officer, aneesh chopra. i dubbed him years ago the indian george clooney. you will see what i'm talking about -- ladies... (laughter) let's begin with bad news for americans who like to hunt and kill their own burritos. >> chipotle restaurants are asking you to leave your guns at home. >> jon: what! chipotle wants me to leave my guns at home! spend twenty minutes at a fast-casual restaurant "without" a handgun? why don't i just let the king of england (bleep) in my mouth?! how about that! tyranny! just curious, why tid chipotle have to inns tiew tiewt a no-guns policy? >> this weekend in dallas, some brought in guns, upsetting customers. >> jon: did that upsetting customers? i would get that. if i was looking for fear in a fast food restaurant, i would go to air bee's! boom! take that to a restaurant that's never been anything but pleasant to me. what are we talking about here? we know the only way the stop a bad guy with a gun is a good guy with a gun. here's the problem, no one in that chipotle knows you're a good guy. they just know you have a gun. and here's the thing, even if you put your gun up and go, don't worry, everybody! we're good guys! that's a thing a clever bad guy might say. (laughter) of course, chipotle's assault on assault rifles is just one part of a larger a attack on firearms supporters, as maryland gun store owner andy raymond learned when he was targeted by extremists just for trying to sell guns. >> one warned raymond's business would be burned to the ground and another threatened raymond would get what was coming to him. >> so, anyway, obviously i received numerous death threats today. i really appreciate it. it was bleep classy. >> jon: for the record, he wasn't being sarcastic. they were really (bleep) classy death threats. look, i support gun control as much as the other 90% of all americans, but there's "no" excuse for anti-gun folks to threaten anyone. >> the hate mail wasn't from anti-gun folks but from gun owners accusing raymond of being a traitor for being willing to sell a weapon some owners see as posing a threat to the second amendment. (bleep). >> what kind of gun is a threat to the second amendment? a gun that shoots other guns? a gun that goes back in time and kills amendments? >> a new weapon called the smartgun uses computer technology that prevents anyone other than the gun's owner from shooting. >> made in germany, it requires users to wear a radio-controlled watch to fire it. >> belinda leads the american division of armatex and met me at a gun range. >> so, red means you are not the authorized user. >> putting the ammunition in. i can fire." >> wow, that's like something i never thought i would live to see, an msnbc host at a shooting range! (laughter) but this smart gun sounds good, too! it protects your home, it does your kid's algebra homework, and it can't be turned against you. who wouldn't want that? >> now in the middle of the night when somebody breaks in, before i can shoot my gun, "where's my bracelet!? i've got to go downstairs!" (laughter) >> jon: yeah! (bleep) yeah! no, that does seem like an awful lot of hassle to go through before you shoot someone. it's so onerous. what, do i have to reach with my gun and get the bracelet with the other? it's a wrist band, not a victorian corset! hold on! look, if you don't want a smart gun, don't buy them. how is this a second amendment threat? >> in 2002, new jersey passed a law requiring that once a smart gun goes on the market anywhere in the country, gun sellers in new jersey must move within three years to only sell smart guns, taking traditional guns off the shelves. >> jon: whoa... point, gun nuts. although once that new jersey law's sponsor realized her law was not making "all" guns safer, but rather, preventing "any" safe gun from being sold, she had a change of heart. >> new jersey state senate majority leader loretta weinberg is offering to repeal a gun law she sponsored 12 years ago if the nra agrees to stop its opposition to smart guns. >> jon: yes! it's a win-win! everyone is holding hands and singing "gun-baya!" (laughter) it's like kumbaya but with more shooting. and just to be clear -- n.r.a., you've been offered a deal where new jersey will repeal a gun control law if, in return, you consent to let people sell "more" guns! it's a total victory! it's like your wet dream. we all know how pro-choice you are gun-wise. >> the fact is we believe in free markets and free choice. that's what this country is about. >> there is no greater freedom than the right to survive and protect our families with all the rifles, shotguns and handguns we want. >> jon: so it's a deal! >> the nra for its part is not showing any signs it will back off its tough stance against the smart guns. >> jon: holy (bleep)! finally, the n.r.a. has met its >> jon: holy (bleep)! finally, the n.r.a. has met its match -- the n.r.a.! to pitch in for an industrial-sized smoker. before earning 1% cash back everywhere, every time. and 2% back at the grocery store. even before he got 3% back on gas. all with no hoops to jump through. norm used his bankamericard cash rewards credit card to enter the bbq masters invitational. where he smoked 40 pounds of ribs and the competition. that's the satisfaction of rewarding connections. apply online or at a bank of america near you. what is this place? where are we? this is where we bring together the fastest internet and the best in entertainment. we call it the x1 entertainment operating system. it looks like the future! he has a phaser! it's not a phaser! it's my phone! he can use his voice to control the tv. you can use your woice? my voice. your woice. my voice. "vuh," voice. his voice. your woice? look. watch sci-fi. [ female announcer ] the x1 entertainment operating system, only from xfinity. (cheers and applause) >> jon: millions of years ago... (laughter) -- the dinosaurs became extinct , 6,000 years ago. luckily, we humans are smarter. not smart enough to stop it, just smart enough to know about it in advance. it's the subject of our new segment. human extinction watch: you take it from here apes. (laughter) so what will erase us from the planet? our first candidate, pestilence. >> the deadly mers virus that causes respiratory and kidney problems is spreading worldwide. >> mers or middle eastern respiratory syndrome is a new, imported disease at started with camels overseas! (laughter) >> first you convince our kids that cigarettes are cool, and now this? (laughter) so on a scale of zero to "we're all gonna die", just how contagious is this mers thing? >> we've been talking with investigators here at the cdc. they underline that this has spread through extended contact. >> jon: extended contact. okay, okay. >> the cdc say an illlinois man got the virus from an indiana healthcare worker who brought it from the middle east. their only physical contact, a handshake. >> jon: wait, what? since when does a handshake count as "extended contact"? you better tell me they were shaking hands in thanks for the blowjobs they just gave each other. i must say, that 69 went exceedingly well. yes, say hello to the wife! yes, say hello to the -- all right. listen -- (laughter) how do you know they weren't giving each other ice cream? so i guess this is it. we ear taking the mers training to extinction down, population -- >> they say the patient is in good condition. all the people on the flight are fine. it might be more treatable. >> should americans be worried at all? >> no. >> jon: oh, so it's less of a contagen and more you got mail situation. i guess they will have to find another way. >> scientists warn a large part of antarctica is melting and cannot be stopped. >> jon: that sounds interesting. how do we know it's not apocalyptic? >> we're past the point of no return. the science is real, it is rue. >> jon: we're all gonna die! you know it's serious if someone on fox news just said "climate change is real"! i believe that is a sign of the apocalypse! (applause) i believe that may be a quote from revelation! and lo, i spied a pale anchor upon a fox, and he spaketh truths. and then the seas part, swallowing up the people... (laughter) the bible gets high-pitched when it gets like that. how floody will these rising sea levels get? >> a 10-foot rise in sea level would submerge tunnels and subways here in manhattan and parts of queens and brooklyn >> jon: new york doesn't need subways, not with the new program. that looks fun. i'm already looking forward to this sea level extension. >> this won't happen immediately. we're talking 200 to 500 years before the whole thing goes. >> jon: oh. well, i'm not going to know any of those people (laughter) got any global catastrophes that could affect me? >> fighting words from the manager of the philadelphia phillies. he claims that the shake shack at citi field got him violently ill. ryne sandberg says he came down with food poisoning and lost six pounds in two days. this after eating one of the shake shack's burgers over the weekend in queens. >> wait, eating shake shack burgers at citi field? (whisper) that's all i do. >> but the team says here if that's the case it did not come from the citi field locations. so shake shack obviously trying to figure out whats happening here. >> i'll tell you what's happening here. a great restaurant is being slandered by some jackoff from philadelphia. apparently after years of choking down waste beef trimmings coated in cheez whiz the flora in sandberg's tum tum couldn't handle "actual" food. what's a matter, sandberg? you'd rather have one of these? >> huh? is that what you would rather have? yeah! what kind of city takes the parts of the cow normal people throw away, fries it up on a hunk of bread and calls it their signature dish? before they serve it, ask can, do you want me to put whiz on that? i'll tell you, a city so (bleep) dumb, it uses its art museum as exercise equipment! yeah, you heard me! a city so famously horrible no animal would deign to root for its baseball team, forcing you to go with this (bleep) up jim henson reject-looking piece of (bleep). and tell me this, you liberty-bell worshipping (bleep): hold on a second -- what city is so insecure it has to put its name on cream cheese? cream cheese! a dish that makes itself if you leave milk out! you dare aisle donald trump (bleep)! okay, you made a topping for a bagel. what do you want, a nobel prize? but seriously, thanks for selling these in brick shape. in case i wanted to build my own international house of (bleep) cream cheese. you philly piece of (bleep). 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(cheers and applause) >> jon: my guest tonight, he was the first chief technology officer of the united states government, a post he held from 2009 to 2012. his new book is called "innovative state: how new technologies can transform government." please welcome aneesh chopra. (cheers and applause) >> jon: all right, new. exciting! >> jon: indian clooney! was i wrong? no, "innovative state: how new technologies can transform government" i guess my question would be why haven't they? what's taking new technology so long? is government technology immune to some extent? >> well, let's put ourselves in some historical content, john. >> jon: you and i? yes, sir! >> jon: all right. if you look back throughout history we've had long periods where the federal government actually led the private sector in the use of technologies. one of the founding technologies for i.b.m. had its origins in a census government employee. >> jon: what? yes, sir, did you know that? the 1870 census. >> jon: sure, i knew that. yes, sir. >> jon: so why did it fall behind? >> if you take the long view, we have been there for a while, it's the last 20 years where the pace of innovation and the private sector, crowd computing, big data, mobile broadband, these technologies have been harder to ingest into the government largely because we've had a difficult process to bringing new technologies in. we walked into the door of the white house, still had internet explorer 6 on my computer. >> jon: you were using 6! i don't know what to say. >> we have to bring new technology there. it was the buggy version. >> jon: in the three years you were there, it's hard to reconcile, i think, for me, as advanced as the the obama campaign was with their technology in terms of getting reelected, why they had so much difficulty. let's use the v.a. as an example. >> sure. >> jon: they've known for years that the system there is antiquated. we clearly have the technology to update it and make it work more efficiently. why haven't we been able to? clearly, they threw a lot of resources at healthcare.gov once they realized that was wonky, why can't they throw everything at the v.a.? >> let me begin with personal context. i was in the cabinet in v.a. before i had a chance to come to washington. >> jon: okay. >> i had a colleague in the cabinet whose son had been attacked by a missile in baghdad and she shared with me the challenges as her son came back to health of the records she had on paper and his family had to truck around between the different locations. so we came in and made it a clear priority to digitize and open up some of those records. so now, today, over a million veterans have been able to download safely and securely electronic copies of the same records. so we've modernized a number of the systems that have been in place. >> jon: 90% of these guys are still working on paper records. >> the claims backlog you have been talking about quite a bit. >> jon: down a bit. we had a center in virginia where the fire marshal had to declare the building uninhabitable because of the paper. we have those scanned out, electronic forms have come in and the backlog is down 50% because we've put in a lot of focus and attention. when we learn of problems -- president obama said we've got to get to the root of the problems and fix them. >> jon: right. here's the thing... (laughter) we knew the problems going in in 2007, and it's 2014. and it's hard to -- and, listen -- >> i hear you. >> jon: -- it's not an attack on the good-hearted people who have tried to work to fix it, but it is hard to swallow the idea that, hey, we've cut it 50% in seven years, you know. i guess what i'm saying is, is there something within the process? you're a guy who understands this technology. >> yes. >> jon: my guess is you could design a system that could be implemented far more cheaply than the billion dollars they spent to create the two programs at d.o.d. and v.a. that don't even talk to each other, you could do it for much less and much faster. why can't they? >> actually, it's happening, and let me be careful. in the american healthcare system at large the ability for two systems not to talk to each other is a problem. when they were built just for their primary use, the ability to take information and share it with others was not part of the original design. so after the fact, if you try to stitch these things together, you don't want to introduce error. you don't want to stitch them together by brute force and say, hey, is this working and run the risk you have the wrong medication for the patient and issued the wrong dose. that's harm. the reason i said empower them directly, the system who has the data can give it to you. >> jon: what system? each system has their own data. you don't want the veteran of having to go through the work, i hear you. >> jon: they're already doing it. >> it is safe, secure, and their families -- i would rather my colleague -- >> jon: you would recommend not having a centralized system? >> that's going to take a long time. they're going to work through that process. >> jon: why is that? that's my point. why is that going to take so long? >> you have a legacy database you will have to modernize. every system in the united states, public and private sector were built with these. i want to empower people to live better lives and allow them to live healthier lives. >> jon: you know what? you're better than an indian clooney. you're better than clooney! innovative state is on the shelves. the interview was long. you probably only saw a few minutes and are thinking, that didn't make any sense whatsoever. if you go to the web, now -- are you familiar with that? >> i think so. it was innovation from government (laughter) >> jon: that is true, i'll give you that. "innovative state: how new technologies can transform government." go to the web! aneesh chopra! [music - artist: hanan townshend "awareness"] we read and write poetry because we are members of the human race. and the human race is filled with passion. and medicine, law, business, engineering - these are noble pursuits and necessary to sustain life. but poetry, beauty, romance, love - these are what we stay alive for. to quote from whitman, "o me, o life of the questions of these recurring. of the endless trains of the faithless. of cities filled with the foolish. what good amid these, o me, o life? answer: that you are here. that life exists and identity. that the powerful play goes on, and you may contribute a verse." 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[ female announcer ] the x1 entertainment operating system, only from xfinity. ssive.emale announcer ] the x1 entertainment operating system, >> jon: why do you think that sex between homosexuals is any less safe than sex between heterosexuals? >> is it okay for, you know, eight of your friends that you're in love with to captioning sponsored by comedy central captioned by media access group abh

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