Transcripts For COM The Daily Show With Jon Stewart 20140115

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the crisp clear streams through the reservoirs, i love this. the ice is even made from west virginia. i don't want it to be one bit diluted. 100% pure west virginia transparent gold. let me take a sizable gulp while you watch this clip. >> 300,000 people in west virigina v- are told to stay away from their tap water, not use it for anything. a chemical spill may have contaminated the drinking water. [ laughter ] >> jon: sorry, i was enjoying this delicious water so much i missed what they were saying. what were they saying? >> a chemical spill in the elk river may have contaminated the drinking water. >> jon: okay, i heard it that time. [laughter] i did taste something just a skosh difference. an undertone just a sous sant, a note of -- >> residents noticed something was wrong when the water smelled like licorice. >> jon: there was that smell and also the water game them explosive diarrhea and vomitting. how do you get that with a fracking in candy land? how does this happen? >> the crisis began when a toxic chemical used to process coal looked out of a 38,000 gallon storage tank. it overflowed into the water north of water treatment plant that provides drinking water for the region. >> jon: i'm not an industrial evening near or a expert in sewage treatment or a city planner, or a doctor or a moyle -- but why -- [laughter] -- why would you build your toxic chemical storage tanks upstream -- [laughter] -- and drinking water adjacent? although i imagine because it was in such a vulnerable position it was highly regulated. >> this -- this toxic chemical source. from what i understand the tanks were inspected as recently as [clears throat] 1991. are you --1991? that's like six batmans ago. 1991. that is not even the most recent palindroneddrome year. yeah, that would be 2002. i think i probably just blew up a nerd's brain. [laughter] the point is this: apparently there are very few regulations vis-a-vis the riverfront storage of toxic chemicals in the sovereign state of west virginia. in lieu of cautions the governor had post cautions. >> do not drink it. do not cook with it. do not take a bath in it. >> >> jon: do not feed it through a hose connected to a sprinkler which you then run through it going whee,. do not freeze it in a block of ice and then use your self to stand on it to hang yourself therefore creating a locked room mystery. do not gift to your turtles unless you want them to become prolific -- [laughter] what is the name of company that exploited the lack of scrutiny and regulation of the toxic chemical industry since 1991? >> a company called freedom industries. >> jon: are you (bleep) kidding me? [laughter] of course. why not? why not in reality have it named the same as it would be in the sat tearsatirical hbo movie about a toxic chemical company. a british person has to appear and apologize for it whether it's bp to the gulf or peers morgan leaving a pool party. you know what you did (bleep). freedom industries gary southern. >> this incident is extremely unfortunate, unanticipated and we are very, very sorry for the disruption to everybody's daily life that this he is dent has caused. >> jon: on the plus side, look how much easier it is to fish now. [ laughter ] you just scoop! [laughter] for more we go to jason jones live tonight in west virginia's kanawha county. thank you for joining us. please, you can if you want. i don't care. [cheers and applause] jason five days now without water. the people of west virginia must be pretty -- >> thirsty, jon. they are thirsty and also filthy. thirsty and filthy but most of all angry so i have to say we were warned this was coming. >> an aggressor nation or extremely group could contaminate the water supply. >> the potential to leaven tire regions with contaminated water. >> there's been documents uncovered that point to al qaeda wanting to hit our water supply. >> that's right. it's enhanced interrogation time. listen no waterboarding we're down to our last bottle of poland springs. >> jon: you are one our program's finest journalists. >> yes, i am. [ laughter ] >> jon: so you know this was in no way a terror attack. >> of course it was which is why we'll do whatever it takes, spend whatever it costs, invade any country that might be harboring these monsters and suspend whichever article of the constitution it takes until we're safe again. >> jon: jason it wasn't terrorism. don't listen to them. [cheers and applause] it wasn't terrorism! this was an industrial accident. >> industrial accident? >> jon: what? >> so what the -- >> jon: yes. >> so what the (bleep) am i doing here? >> jon: jason, no, come back. >> what? >> jon: there's still a juicy story here. the chemical tanks hadn't been inspected in 23 years. this disaster could have been prevented with simple common sense regulation and enforcement. >> whoa, whoa, whoa and live in an environmental press state. i would rather drink a whole vat of toxic licorice sluj. >> jon: you must agree someone should be held accountable for what happened here. obviously. first of all we need a congressional investigation into this massive intelligence failure and fire the c.i.a. and n.s.a. agents who failed to connect the dots. >> jon: jason, it was not terrorism! >> i forgot you said that, yeah. why the (bleep) am i here? [laughter] >> jon: jason jones, [cheers and applause] >> jon: welcome back. now, the only thing -- this is true. the only thing anyone in new york, noj noj, the en-- new jersey, the entire tristate region is talking about fallout of scandal with chris christie. >> the new mayor of big apple is dealing with a scannedel of his own. >> jon: what, wait? bill deblasio's scandal? he handled a major snowstorm. did he all right. he is pushing for sweeping reform. he has been doing a fine job. what sort of scandal could he be involved in. >> mayor deblazeo may not necessarily -- deblasio may not necessarily eat pizza like most new yorkers. [cheers and applause] >> jon: you have my attention. [laughter] the guy is like six ten he is a large man does he eat pease sca as though they are ritz crackers. so what? unless he rolls up a pie into a ball and takes it as a suppistory at grimaldi's, i don't see the problem. >> the mayor stopped by for a slice in staten island. he cut his pizza with a knife and a fork. >> jon: mother (bleep)! [audience boos] [laughter] breathe, johnny, breathe, johnny. [ laughter ] i know what this is. this is nonsense. it's a distraction. the liberal media from the real issue which is governor christie's failure to take responsibility for his administration's -- deblasio you son of a bitch! [laughter] you are supposed to be champion of the middle class. two weeks into your term and we catch you eating pizza a la trump! [cheers and applause] and you call yourself a radical socialist -- [laughter] i understand there's a learning curve to be the mayor here is lesson number one. learn how to eat your significant citi's signature dish. if you were mayor of philadelphia would ease a cheesesteak with a knife and store. if you were mayor of buffalo would you eat wings with a knife and fork? you were the mayor of boston would you eat chowder -- even there you use your hands. >> in my and set of tral homeland they use a fork and knife. >> jon: i get you are italian. not a jew impersonating an italian. you are respecting your native land's customs. one thing though: were you elected the mayor of italy? no! look out of window of pizzeria you are sitting in. you don't see the learning tower of pizza, you don't see you see yurchgyards and a tanning salon. you know what? because you are in (bleep) staten island. it isn't shaped like a boot, it smells like one. when you are there you eat your pizza like every other savage in this city. everybody knows you are not a real new yorker until your shirt has at least seven orange grease stains on it. deblasio? >> his a lot on it. [ laughter ] -- it had a lot on it. [ laughter ] >> jon: oh, you had a lot of toppings? oh, did you have toppings? you of all -- [laughter] you of all people are worried about holding your pizza? [laughter] you with your enormous cong hands. you know the wood thing they use to slide the pizza into the oven? that thing s was built after your one of hands. i'm sure the at a pizza parlor it's called a deblasio. >> i often start with knife and fork and switch over to the american approach and pick up the pizza. >> jon: what is this mixed martial arts? what do you mean? you are eating a pizza. i start out italian, switch to american and go with the mongolia cheese -- no. you pick it up and eat it with your hands. admittedly bloomberg did not eat it with his hands. he had had an assistant cut it up and feed it to him like a baby bird but you are not that! you are a mayor of people! eat like one. we will be right [cheers and applause] >> jon: welcome back. my guest tonight academy -- he's an academy award winning documentary filmmaker. his new one is called god loves iew and good yanch the government is the government and they have a responsibility to do what they want to. the law says no homosexual in this nation. it's an abomination to god. i should stand in agreement they shouldn't open the doors because god doesn't want it. he wants it stopped. uganda is trying to take a position. >> halleluiah. >> jon: please welcome to the show roger ross williams. [cheers and applause] hello, sir. [cheers and applause] thank you for being here. [cheers and applause] >> nice to be here. >> jon: congratulations. >> thank you. >> jon: it's a remarkable film. this is a film about the american evangelical movement, or at least one branch in uganda. >> yes, it is. >> jon: you got involved how? >> i grew up in the church. so i just read about what was going on in iew and goodal. i read that there was a law to make homosexuality p punishment by death but i read that americans were behind it. i went there i met david kato who is say activity and he said this is the story not told in uganda. and that's how it started. >> jon: it's an incredible story. when you contacted them because you have incredible access to this movement of evangelicals, how did you make your pitch to them? >> i said i grew up in the church. i understand. i understand speaking in tongues. i understand the passion and the end time but how does that translate into like killing people for who they are? that was amazing to america i said i grew up in the church so i want to understand -- i want to understand what your -- what is behind all this? why uganda? >> jon: was there any part? i'm curious. they clearly have taken a stance against -- in the movie homosexuality three things, homosexuality, abortion and islam. >> the threat of islam. >> jon: sorry not islam but the threat of islam. they've taken a stand against this. christians are persecuted in certain places certainly like north korea and that. are they aware of irony of persecuting people for who they are white fighting against persecution for themselves because of who they are? >> i don't think there's any self awareness. >> jon: that never came -- that never? >> i think they are so driven by what they consider biblical law. by the end times about eradicating sin, that's that is what drives them. >> jon: the idea to them is if eradicate homosexuality in uganda jeezous comes back. this is the connection they are drawing. >> yes, this starts in africa. >> jon: sure, sure. it did ultimately start there, i guess. >> it did ultimately start in africa, you are right. >> jon: nigeria, the president of nigeria recently i think it was today signed that very law. how is this happening? where is the intensity and impetus coming from? is it from america? >> it's american leadersers who feel they are totally frustrated with what is going on in america. they've lost the culture war. as marriage equality is passed state by state, the supreme court ruling. so they are frustrated to they go to uganda. [cheers and applause] >> jon: did you -- you talk about them as though they have big hearts and they are good people. do you like them? >> you know, it's amazing, i actually really learned to like all the people in my film. i think that the wall that divided us came down. there's a lot of missionaries doing good work in africa. it's it's just a few. it's scott lively who went to africa saying the nazi movement was a gay movement. he wrote a book called the pink swas tick can a. >> jon: i will say this, the uniforms are pristine in the nazis. certainly someone had -- [laughter] did they learn to like you? >> i think so. you know joanna watson when you saw in the clip. she said roger i think gay people should go to prison. i said do you think i should go to prison at the end? she said no, i love you. even though she has her own issues with her own sexuality. [ laughter ] >> jon: when i watched that the terminology she used was interesting. its that because it's an abomination. having read the bible because i do stay in a lot of hotels. [laughter] they also talk about how in the same chapter eating shellfish is an adom bom nation. -- abomination. le the focus on this? >> i think certain type of fundamentalist evangelicals are obsessed with sex. at ihop. >> jon: not the pancake house. >> there's a buddy system to monitor each other not to look at form. >> jon: do they know it's a form of pornography. [ laughter ] >> exactly. >> jon: all right. i guess. all right. >> i just found uganda is -- google came out with a stud dwhrai uganda is the third country to watch gay porn. >> jon: one of the top three. >> uganda. >> jon: wow. this google study, it doesn't name names, does it? >> no, i might be in trouble myself. [ laughter ] >> jon: the film now you find out on thursday if you are nominated for an oscar. you are on the short list. [cheers and applause] >> thank you. >> jon: "god loves that's our shore. here it is your moment of zen. >> in colorado where marijuana is legal thieves have been selling the 420 mile marker on interstate 70 so often >> tosh.0 features videos from the internet. we discourage anyone from attempting these. enjoy! [laughter] [cheers & applause] >> laughter is the best medicine next to oxicontin. [laughter] welcome to tosh.0. [cheers & applause] i am your host, daniel tosh. i'm aware this show is not for everyone. if funny jokes are not your cup of tea, then maybe you should just keep watching "rules of engagement." [laughter] on tonight's episode, the greatest actor you've never heard of. brian atene, stops by. i seek out my own golden voiced hobo. and we take a long hard look at black twitter.

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