Come out of air force one. He found did you i. S. I. S. Thank you very much, president obama. I have great respect. If someone cant handle a twitter account, he cant handle the nuclear code. Temperamentally unfit to be commander in cleevment pumps himself up to put others down. Tried to stay as far away from working people. Uniquely unqualified to be president. This is a guy who tweets. And you want to be president of the United States . Come on, man mr. President , it was a great honor being with you and i look forward to being with you many many more times in the future. Thank you. Trevor that is one hell of a performance, especially by president obama, which means at least one black person should get nominated for an oscar this year. cheers and applause on the other side, trump looks like he likes obama, too. Ben carson must be so jealous you oh, rats trumps gettinganewblackfriend. laughter so there you have it, folks, president Obama Meeting with future president donald trump. Im going to go throw up now. Well be right back. cheers and applause this is lynchburg, tennessee. This is how many people were born here. This is how many are named hiawatha kitty mcgee. This guy keeps the town dry. These guys would prefer it a little wet. This many are proud of what we make here. This is how many will go around bragging about it. This is our town. For 150 years, the home of jack daniels. If you cant get here, just look for one of our postcards. They look like this. Just look for one of whos the genius who puts a girl in heels on a subway grate . Miss monroe, eat a snickers. Why . You get a little cranky when youre hungry. Better . Much better. This scene will never make the cut. Sweetie, you know what were craving right now . Crispy chicken and fried egg with baconlike brunch. Brunch . But its 8pmand its tuesday huh, i wonder if my mother would like to stay with us. Heres what im thinkingbrunch. All day, every day. Should we get started . Who wants coffee . Introducing my new brunchfast menu. With 10 delicious items like my bacon and egg chicken sandwich, southwest scrambler plate, a sparkling blood orange cooler, and homestyle potatoes. Served all day, every day. Only at jack in the box. cheers and applause trevor welcome back to the daily show. We are still talking about the election of donald trump because it still really happened. Im sorry i have to keep saying that. Even if you would like to forget that donald trump is a president elect, we shouldnt forget the people who voted for him because feeling forgotten is what drew some of them to trump in the first place. Im representing millions of people that really feel angry and disenfranchised. People all across this nation that have been ignored, neglected and abandoned. I have visited the laidoff factory workers and the communities crushed by our horrible and unfair trade deals. The forgotten men and women of our country will be forgotten no longer. cheers and applause trevor the forgetten men and women will be forgetten no longer. Now you know why scott baio endorsed trump. But thats not who trump was talking about on the path to his stunning election. Donald trump was swept into office by people in the heartland of america whove seen the industrialized base of their towns gutted and, yes, there were plenty of racists and bigots among them. But a lot of trump voters previously voted for president obama which doesnt seem like something a racist person would do unless theyre racist and crosseyed. Go get em, romney. What . laughter 40 years ago, the american heart land was filled with jobs, detroit made scars, pittsburgh made steel and a lot of people dont know this but cleveland made the best dildos. Made in ohio, the quality doing. Much of thats changed. When the steel mills closed in the 70s, youngstown lost 40,000 good paying jobs. Today almost 40 of residents live below the federal poverty line. As america ushered in a new guilded age in milwaukee, people were left behind. Kodak was one of the leading companies with 45,000 employees worldwide, today kodak is a much smaller company. Trevor thats the thing, many people in america lost their jobs not just to Foreign Countries but also new technologies. Whether you like it or not there are many jobs that donald trump cant bring back. I dont think some of these people understand that. Unless hes planning to help kodak to force apple to put film cameras on the back of their phones, you cant bring those jobs back. laughter yeah, skim will not be happy about it. Along with the jobs leaving, Middle America now suffers from suicide, crime, drug addiction and zero art house theaters. They will never see clause and his yiewn cycle. Red doesnt necessarily mean why power. It means people wanted to have attention paid to them. How do you get seen and riot effectively in a place where almost no one lives . Tip over a bail of hay . Do you plow the wrong field . Yeah how do you create a protest where nobody lives . No one even notices you. Jesses in the street again, sheriff laughter so i get that, for some of you, Trump Supporters seem crude and disturbing and its hard to accept that this is now their country, too, but youve also got to understand that if this is game of thrones, donald trump is basically jon snow. He realized the wildlings are registered voters, too, and their support brought him to power. Donald trump shouldnt be the only person listening to these people. We all need to listen to each other. Its marred sometimes but it should be. One of the reasons trumps win was such a surprise is because some of the polls werent listening to these people. Luckily at the daily show we learn from other peoples mistakes so we sent ronny chieng to listen to the people whether they like it or not. The polls in this past election let us down. Some are saying the discrepancy stem from the unpollbles, people who refuse to answer polls. Whats the big deal . All i have to do is find people who dont want to poll and poll them on it. Do you want to take a quick poll . No. Trevor do you approve or disapprove of trumps performance so far . bleep . Trevor i take that as approve. One down, 10 million to go. Not as easy as it looked. I want to take a p. O. This is how we end up with bad data. Maybe this will work Free Hamilton tickets. I would love that. Trevor no, im looking for free hament tickets. Mind if i give you a quick poll . No. Trevor do you mind taking a quick poll . Sir, sir, just a quick poll. Take the poll how do you run so fast in robes . Hello, want to see how it takes . Trevor no, i want to give you a poll. No. Trevor take my poll. Let me finish mine, ill do yours. Trevor fine, ill take the bus. But while im here, do you approve or disapprove of president elect trumps performance so far . Approve, approve, disapprove . Quick poll . First names mario, last name . Hey, do you mind taking a quick poll quick . No. Trevor no, no, just gathering data. No. Trevor please, some data. bleep . Trevor want to take a bole . No. In america, no means yes no. Hello, hello . She hung up. That was a baby crime. Might want to call back, may be a situation. Trevor thanks so much ronny c enjoy your phone you too. inner monologue all right, be cool. You got the amazing new iphone 7 on the house by switching to at t. What . . Aand you got unlimited data because you have directv . . Okay, just a few more steps. Door its cool get the iphone 7 on us and unlimited data when you switch to at t and have directv. Whether youre wearing lbeads,. Stripes. Or cheese. If you bleed blue. Black and yellow, purple or various shades of red. This is your beer. cheers and applause trevor welcome back. My guest tonight are the secretaries of the u. S. Air force and the u. S. Army. Please welcome Deborah Lee James and eric fanning. cheers and applause trevor thank you very much. Thank you. Welcome to the show. Great to be here. Trevor it is wonderful to be here for you and for us especially just before veterans day which well chat about shortly. For those of us who dont know there are many positions in the government and military. What is the role of a secretary . The civilian lead of the military service. In our country we have civilian lead to have the military. Eric and i are the c. E. O. S of the air force and army and our job is to work on people and training issues and equipping for today and tomorrow so that our military is ready to do the jobs we call upon them to do. Trevor you are also really special in that you really are the torch bearers, pioneers, in your fields. Only the second woman to be in the power leading division of the military and the first openly gay person who is leading in the military. A question to you when dont ask dont tell came into effect, what did that mean for you personally and what did that mean for the military . It was a difficult period for me personally. I felt like i was the only gay person in the pentagon and actually ended up leaving government service, moving to new york city and doing something entirely different. But debbie got me back in washington, d. C. In a think tank we both ended up working at and i was lucky enough to be in the pentagon when dont ask dont tell was repealed. Iits a very different time now and a very exciting thing this president was able to do. Trevor so when transitioning from one president to another, do your jobs change . Does the vision of the military change . How big can the differences really be . Well, the president , of course, is the commanderinchief of the armed forces, so eric and i are appointees of president obama, so we serve at the pleasure of the president. So, yes, we will be tendering our resignation. But until that time, we continue to serve. Theres work to be done. We have still a strong agenda that we are advancing, and until the very last day, were going to continue to do that. In addition, the orderly transition is crucially important, its important across the government but most especially for the military. We have men and women in harms way all around the world as we speak, and, so, were going to be working on that transition to make sure its orderly and done properly. Trevor when you say the president , obviously, has a large role to play within this, i mean, donald trump has said before he is the best at military thats a direct quote, by the way laughter i feel like were all in the twilight zone. What is your job in relating to a president . What are you doing in service of the president . Well, our direct report is the secretary of defense, who, of course, reports to the. But we have both had the opportunity to be directly with president obama. I, for example, had the opportunity to brief him on our Nuclear Enterprise and several other issues that are impactful to the air force, really impactful to the nation. So we, again, serve at the pleasure of the president , and there will be those who will take our jobs into the future and carry us into the future. Trevor when you look at a few things that are said because many civilians may know this, i know i dont know the real answer to this, and that is donald trump once said he would give an order to kill the families of terrorists, and the army would have to execute that. And, you know, he was then told, no, you know, the military would deny your request because that is unlawful, and he said, no, i will tell them to do it, and they will. If Something Like that were to happen, at what point does the military act beyond the president or at what point does the military deny the request of the commanderinchief . We all, all of us, in and out of uniform, take an oath to the constitution, and the military takes that incredibly seriously. Most people conflate what the military does with who the military is. The military is an incredibly professional, lethal instrument of the United States but the civilians decide what it does within the constraints of the law and we have a number of lawyers swirling around us at the pentagon to make sure we dont cross those lines. Trevor if you look at yourselves in these positions, i know its a deeply personal question, but there is a possibility now america could be facing a time where their president does not believe that women or people who are transgender should be serving in the military. Im not saying for you to disagree with it or not, but if you were to implore him or even tell us why its so important to have that, what would you say . I would explain that its really, really important that, as we go into the future, we have to continue to recruit and retain the very best young people that america has to offer who are willing to come into the military. We, of course, are an allvoluntary force and were in a war for talent just like every corporation across america. So you want the widest pool of people to be able to choose from. I would also point out that, in my opinion, having diverse backgrounds, different ways of approaching problems, the way youve grown up differently, this is having innovation springs from that diversity of thought. So i would say if you want the best armed forces america could possibly have going into the future, make sure you have a diverse armed forces going into the future. cheers and applause trevor i guess that says it the best. Thank you very much. Happy veterans day for tomorrow. cheers and applause thank you. Trevor secretaries Deborah James and eric fanning. Well be right back. Thosm for that. cheers and applause there is no typical day. Theres nothing typical about making movies. Im victoria alonso and im an executive producer at marvel studios. We are very much hands on producers. If my office becomes a plane or an airport the surface pro is perfect, fast and portable but also light. You dont do 14 hours a day 7 days a week for decades if you dont feel it in your heart. Listen i know my super power is to not ever sleep. Thats it, thats the only superpower i have. Thats 7,671 moon rises, we created blue moon. 48 eclipses and a refreshing taste thats always stayed the same. Creatively inspired. Artfully brewed. Blue moon. cheers and applause trevor thats our show for tonight. Stay tuned for midnight coming up next. Now here it is. Your moment of zen. But it never crossed your mind that you might have done better against him, you might have actually won if you had been the democratic nominee . What good does it do now . Minutes until midnight. The day will then reset. We announce the winner. So this week, this week america chose our next president , a hat. Thats not serving enough we just realized that while we were immersed in the year long army crawl through diarrhea that was its 2016 campaign that really feels like all that [bleep] crawled through to get out of prison, there was a punch of piping hot fire emoji content from the World Wide Web that we didnt get to cover like Vladimir Putin awarding steven seeingal russian citizenship, huh . And you disn even know. Now you do. This daring heist to steal 50 grand worth of bull semen, huh . Very exciting. I hope it was already out of the bull when they tried to steal it. And this nightmare inducing lego mans could play cost play, this looks like a batman vilan happened. Just like he fell into a vat at the lego factory and then became this guy. So tonight were going to revisit some of the comedy gold we failed to mine during the election because were pretty [bleep] tired of talking about this pleep bleep election. Like we totally missed this. Thank you, one guy. We totally missed elon musk, i know you want to still keep talking about it elon musk, the handsome billionaire inventor whose one accidental live fire away from being his own origin story, maybe he is that guy, i dont know. Maybe this is elon musk, 2025, we dont know. But he said that we are definitely living in a matrix style simulation. Quoted as saying maybe we should be hopeful this is a simulation because otherwise were going to create simulations indistinguishable from reality or civilizations ceases to exist. So let me ask you this, if this is a simulated reality, why in the world would someone virtually create this, a blobfish, why why . And why does it look so sad. Its like a grumpy catfish. Or he looks like the ziggy comics but like really old. I think elon musk could be on to something with matrix theory, what over movie could we use to explain reality . Jen kirkman. Back to the future because the cubs won, a fascist is running things and hoverboards look stupid. Krz all right, points. Techily back to the future two. Sean. Because it sucks and i make no money. Krz points. Matt braunger. In two years the hunger games, right now titanic krz all right, points. Gentlemen, its been our pledge. applause i have made a dreadful mess. Next, another side effect of the president ial race, we were too busy getting [bleep] by democracy to crank, some good oldfashioned parody porn, that is called electile disfunction, so good night, and audience. But this porn is worth playing. Krz were those annal beads she was holding up . Theyre annal poke balls, poke monday go parody is called porn star g got to [bleep] them all it say literal poke stop so comedians what is a sexy pokemon we might see in this porno . They already had one, scrotal. Already right there, you dont even have to make that up. Matt. Blastachode. Yeah, blastochode. Thats a gross one, that is really gross, you dont want to catch him. Jen. Put it in my meos. Krz great. Next, misconnections, during our electoral haze we lost track of what is most important, crazy celebrity sex stories, comedians, which one of these insane tales about getting tail actually happened. Nicholas cage sid he [bleep] the entire current vast of cast of the view or bobbi brown said the ghost [bleep] a sheet out of him. Because i know whoopi wouldnt put up with that i would say bobbi brown and the ghost. Youre right, lets envoy this. One time i woke up, and yeah, a ghost. I was being mountedded by a ghost. That was the next question. I wasnt high. That was my next question. Wasnt high at all. Were you tripping. No, i was not tripping. Its his prerogative, if he wants to. It is his prerogative, he can do what he wants to do. And quite frankly it was a ghostaroni. Next up, hit the wall, another story lost in the trump tor tad know is ban old baby lady what loses a crown vic trio in virginia. I dont need to tell that you it crashed into a walmart. But here is the twist. For once it wasnt the old lady who was driving. It was her dog. Take it a way, west virginia. They are by far now the most famous dogs. To doubt about that, sadie and pepi were caught on
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