exclusive. this is "piers morgan tonight." i want to start with the trial of dr. conrad murray. hugely significant. for you and your family and for the world to try to go through t process of this trial, we work out what really happened to your brother, michael. as we approach the start of this trial, what are your feelings? >> my feelings are this is something this has been long awaited for. it is up to the point there has been a lot of speculation and hearsay. i think that we are all going to -- it is not going to bring closure but give us a clear understanding of what really happened. i know it's important that the fans and the public as well as ourselves need to know what happened, what took place. there are so many things that happen that we weren't aware of as a family we were kept away. >> do you think that conrad murray was solely responsible for your brother's death? >> my gut feeling is he was present during his death. there's a lot of questions to be answered. we don't know yet. until the trial unfolds and we sort of get the facts, whether they will come to the facts or not, by doing the book, i had a clear understanding of a lot of things that i didn't know from the past and how all these things came about with michael's life and who he interacted with, doing his business and all those things up to the present day. >> it seems to come down to this. i would imagine conrad murray's defense will be that he was encouraged to prescribe propofol drug to michael that night. the drug that is believed to have killed him. i would imagine on your side, you will be arguing as a family and i'm sure the prosecutors will too that this was all conrad murray's decision. it then comes down to addiction. whether michael was addicted, what he was addicted to, and whether the prescription of this drug was just a part of that addiction. what do you think of that? >> well, i think that, first of all, being a cardiologist and not an anesthesiologist is a big difference. conrad murray had no business giving my brother propofol which i just learned about this drug by doing the book. and in terms of them trying to say my brother was an addict or addicted. michael, we know he was on prescription drugs. whether demerol because of pain, excruciating pain, him wanting to have sleep. but -- >> michael just had this chronic inability to sleep. i knew having worked in the media he had a difficulty with it. hi no idea how bad it was. i mean, he would literally be unable to get any sleep at all night after night. >> coming off the stage, 180,000 people out there, your adrenaline is going so high. you are doing so much. it is hard to just put your head on the pillow and sleep. it goes on and on and have to get up off the stage. he always said he didn't want to tour because he didn't want to have the problems of not sleeping and having to take demerol and things like that. but he wasn't addicted to it because his behavior wasn't to the point that he was an addict. he was looking for this to for sleep. he trusted whoever administered these things to him, he trusted them. >> when people hear about drug addition, celebrities, they tend to think cocaine or ecstacy or heroin, whatever it might be. clearly we are not in that situation with michael. they are not drugs to make him high or any kind of high experience. the drugs he was taking were all for pain and sleep. could it have been by the end after years of insomnia, that he had become in a way addicted to any type of drug that would get him the sleep he craved, do you think that's possible? >> i really don't know. i do know that it is a difference between demerol and propofol. >> tell me about propofol. you studied this for your book. it is fascinating what you found out. it is a much stronger drug than people realize. >> it puts you out. it is basically used when people are under the knife and want to not feel the pain. but the key to this is when you are a proven anesthesiologist and you are in the proper settings and the right medical field, you know how much to administer into a patient to keep him above the line but not so above they feel the pain. and to keep them from going below the line. >> is propofol considered by most physicians to be an anesthetic rather than just a sleeping pill? >> i really don't know. but i do know for michael to get sleep he had to be knocked out. and -- this wasn't just this one night. this was administered in him on an ongoing basis. which was causing his body to deteriorate and him to act differently and have different symptoms in his behavior. >> you as a family, you were probably closest to michael in the family. collectively you must have known he had this ongoing problem with sleep in particular. when did you see conrad murray that night in the hospital? >> i saw conrad when i first went to the hospital and when i came back from seeing michael i went back to where my mother was sitting on the other side of the table. i'm here. the table is between us. my mother is here. and you're conrad. we weren't this close. i didn't know who he was. but i said there's something strange about this guy. he's acting strange. i had formed that opinion before i had found out who he was. >> when you say strange, do you mean -- >> behavior. >> suspicious? guilty? >> everything. all of the above. it was just something wasn't right. just wasn't normal. >> did you talk to him? >> no. no. >> did you say anything to the family? >> he wanted to come in, i guess, and say his -- something to my mother, condolences or something. i fet felt uneasy with him. >> did you know that he had been with michael that night? >> i found out, yeah, that he was with michael. he was there but, see, this is a strange case because this is treated as a homicide and the lapd who did their investigation and then there's the whereabouts of who came in and out of the house. those tapes were erased. we don't know. there's a lot of questions. >> which tapes were erased? >> the surveillance tapes. >> they are all gone? >> some of the tapes were erased to the whereabouts who was coming in and out during the time. >> who do you think did the erasing? >> they were in the hands of the police department. >> do you think there may be some kind of coverup? >> what do you think? i would think that as a family member, yes. >> coming up, michael's last tour. why jermaine says it was too much for him. >> they were only concerned about the show. moving the show forward. ♪ i'll be there here's one story. 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[ female announcer ] phillips' colon health. aspercreme breaks the grip, with maximum-strength medicine and no embarrassing odor. break the grip of pain with aspercreme. as i have done several times, can you not dispute the fact he is in pretty good shape. the rehearsals are going great, he looks amazing, he looks excited. this is not a portrait of a guy who is on the verge of death. so i, as a fan of his, was shocked when i watched it to try to work out how it came to his death. you as a family member must be ten times as shocked because you were talking to him most days. how often did you talk to michael? >> we spoke to him not that much during the rehearsals. we last saw him may 14. >> do you know how long he had been given propofol? >> see, with "this is it," there was lot of footage taken out that no one saw. that was the edit before the edit. and so much went on. so much. >> that footage is damaging? do you see a guy in a bit of a daze, zombie? what is the stuff you didn't see? >> this is why the defense will try to paint my brother out to be a drug addict and he was dependent on drugs and it is not true. how does someone be dependent on drugs and in 2008 he's dancing four hours a day. he had a five-year plan, starting a new life. >> let me throw something to you about this. i know somebody who is a very famous tv star. very famous. one of the biggest stars in the world. he is a friend of mine who takes sleeping pills at night. he finds there's too much adrenaline and doing it for years. a form of addition. i was on ambien after breaking ribs for 3 1/2 weeks. when i tried to stop, it was like having a form of cold turkey two, three weeks. these are strong drugs. propofol is significantly stronger. this friend of mine takes or that i was taking. if michael was getting this stuff over a regular period of time, he could still be performing perfectly well but as you say, underneath it, the damage would be pretty intensive, i would say. >> that's the question. michael has always had an anesthesiologist around when he was taking things. >> someone who knew about the process of knocking people out for the purposes of sleep. >> he's -- he's lived all this time doing demerol and sleeping pills and pain pills. the symptoms from propofol is like no one knew that he was -- well, the public didn't know. he was complaining about his body. one side being an ice cube. another side being very warm. >> do you know how long he had been taking -- is there any evidence have you seen. >> i really don't know. >> what is the family's belief? what is the theory that you think about? >> our -- our belief is that we knew he was doing prescription drugs to sleep and pain. and we didn't know about propofol. i just found out about this drug which i can't even pronounce hardly. the symptoms. the reason i'm going the talk about the symptoms because you look at the past tours, you never heard of these symptoms that michael jackson not knowing whether to go right or left when he comes on stage. >> who was he telling about the symptoms? >> no. these were people around him. him not being able to lift -- lift himself out of a five- pound prop or something and repeating himself. and him losing just unbelievable weight. these are signs of toxic in your body. >> are these signs from what you have been able to work out of propofol abuse? in other words, long-term use of that specific drug? are these side effects that you have identified? >> those are symptoms of that because of the fact that it was administered in him outside of a hospital setting, person inadequate to do this, and the fact that the night that he died, he was -- he just arranged a $15 million payment on the house. that's saying that he had plans of going beyond "this is it." >> michael was a -- tough character when it came to business. he knew his own mind. he was the most fabulous and excellent entertainer of the generation. by common agreement when it came to his business, his craft, he could be a tough demanding task master of people. also quite obstinate. is it possible, do you think to be fair minded to conrad murray for a moment, to be dispassionate. take yourself out of the family position for a moment. is it possible knowing michael that he could have just ordered and demanded that conrad murray give him this drug? that conrad murray he's going to claim tried to resist it but eventually succumbed to pressure. is that possible? >> whether it is possible or not, the -- being a doctor, you take an oath to care for your patient. not to kill them. and you take an oath to do things there are proper in the medical world not to administer outside of a hospital setting. it is not even in your area. you are a cardiologist, not an anesthesiologist. >> even if michael -- >> even if michael -- he trusted doctors. dr. murray should have said no. under no circumstances, no. the fact that these symptoms went on around everybody there who weren't concerned about how he felt, they were only concerned about the show. moving the show forward. >> these are people working for aeg? >> these are people working for aeg, working for him, working for the show. >> i mean, there was always a bit of a circus around michael and his life. how many of the people directly around him at the time that he died do you think are culpable for a form of responsibility for his death? >> see, that's the question i have. that's a question we have as a family because i said in the book why didn't somebody call me, jackie, tito, marlin, his family, to say come down, your brother is not acting normal? had we been called he would be alive today because we would have taken him to the hospital. >> why do you think they didn't? >> because they wanted the show to go on. it is the same thing of knowing that it wasn't his voice 100% on those songs released. it is all about seeing -- this is -- this is a story about greed, power and money. not looking at the person in michael. what i tried to do in the book is to show my little brother us growing up as jackson 5, kids with a dream. and the human side of it. no matter how great the success had became. he is still from a family, we are human. and -- >> you basically believe, i think as a family reading the book, that the pressure from the people that were putting on this huge extravaganza, this amazing tour. i had tickets to the first night in london. very excited about it. greatest performer i have ever seen. there were people there who had billions of dollars, hundreds of millions of dollars at stake on this tour being successful. it is not in their interest to raise alarm bells about his health, is there? >> no, because the fact that still if you have tens of billions of dollars, you still want more. but this -- this was than an event that was going to put money in everybody's pockets. but at the same time, his health was ignored. it is like they pushed and pushed this bird who was injured, his wings were injured and wanted to push him off the cliff and expected him to fly and he failed. >> when you saw michael after he died in the hospital, how did he physically look to you? obviously he was dead. but how did he look in terms of the michael you knew? was it the same kind of body that you would expect. >> no, no. he had gone from 150 to 136. he was frail. he was -- i touched his face. his face was still soft. and kissed his forehead and i pulled one of his eyelids back. i wanted to look in his eyes. and -- i couldn't believe that what i saw wasn't my brother. and for people who had been around him all these years to see that and not say something and it bothers me, bothers us as a family. what were they concerned about? money? their jobs? or my brother's health? >> do you believe that you are going to get answers in this trial? or is this simply just not going to be enough evidence? >> to tell you the truth, it's -- the defense is going to try to paint my brother out to be the most horrible person and he wasn't. he was most concerned about the world and healing the world and children who were starving and he just -- he did it and showed the actions. that's not the behavior of a drug addict. that's not the behavior of a person who is irresponsible and just wanted to be high out there. he has never the type of person that took drugs for recreation and irresponsible and didn't care. so my point to answer your question, we are not going to get michael back. even if conrad murray goes to jail, if that happens, i really don't know. we lost an incredible human being, a brother who -- my little brother who just really cared about the world. to answer your question, we really don't know. we really don't know. i wrote the book to show the world, to show the fans this is who we are as a family. and it was a long process. and it opened my eyes to a lot of things i didn't know. the crap and garbage that has been written about my family for so many years and all these other books that went unauthorized and people saying things that didn't know us. and then thinking we are from a small house in gary, indiana, with humble beginnings. so we weren't privy to crooks and people who had hidden agendas. >> will the family attend the trial? >> yes. >> will you do that? >> absolutely. >> every day? >> i'm going to try to be there as much as i can, yes. >> how do you think you will feel when you see conrad murray there? >> i didn't feel good about him before i knew him. i'm going to feel the same way. what i want from this whole thing is not for michael's death to be a question mark and people's hearts and minds. too many people out there. michael was -- he touched the hearts of many people around the world. and that's important. that's where we cry. >> we will take a break. then come back and go back to those early days. go back to the young michael. and the dreams he had and you all had as a family. >> we reached out to aeg but they declined to comment on jermaine jackson's statements and ignored michael jackson's frail health and pushed him too hard. ♪ [ male announcer ] tom's discovering that living healthy can be fun. see? he's taking his vitamins. new one a day vitacraves plus omega-3 dha is a complete multivitamin for adults. plus an excellent source of omega-3 dha in a great tasting gummy. one a day, gummies for grown-ups. sun life financialrating should be famous.d bad, we're working on it. so you're seriously proposing we change our name to sun life valley. do we still get to go skiing? 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>> that's a good question. i have always been told that i have never left and still that boy in gary because -- no matter where we come from, we never forget that little house, my father being laid off at the steel and picking up potatoes to fe