what actually happens to my physical remains is of zero interest to me. i don't want anybody seeing my body. i don't want anybody -- i don't want a party. reported dead. unless they can provide entertainment value in a perverse or subversive way. i mean, if you could throw me into a wood chirp, spray me into har rod's in the middle of the rush hour, that would be pretty epic. i wouldn't being mind being remembered in that way. ♪ one, two, three four five six ♪ ♪ ♪ with the radio on ♪ ♪ i'm in love with massachusetts ♪ ♪ and the neon when it's cold outside ♪ ♪ and the highway when it's late at night ♪ ♪ with the radio on ♪ >> what the [ muted ] am i doing here? i shall explain. one minute i was standing next though a deep fryer. the next, i was watching the sunset over the sahara. i realize that one thing led directly to the other. had i not taken a dead-end dish washing job, i would not have become a cook. had i not become a cook, i would never have become a chef. had i not become a chef, i never would have been able to [ muted ] up so spectacularly. had i not known what it was like to really [ muted ] up, that that that obnoxiously wildly memoir i wrote wouldn't be half as interesting. ♪ >> and i'm not going to tell you how to live your life. i'm just saying, i guess, that i got very lucky. ♪ ♪ >> you are probably going to find out about it anyway. here a little preemptive truth telling. there is no happy ending. >> all around -- >> it's just on the news not a very nice way, i know, tony. >> thanks. >> what would you like? >> apple juice. >> apple juice. >> apple juice. >> or cranberry, whatever we have more of. happiness is a fresh pack. first thing in the morning. i mean, before i brush my teeth i mean, i roll out of bed, light a cigarette, stumble into this room and i start writing immediately. i always use language to get out of trouble. you know, i found at an early age if i made everybody in the class laugh, that was power. i came from a household with a lot of books. and in fact the first book i remember reading was a book called "why johnny can't read," which i stole from my mother? she was anticipating i would have difficulty reading as i was exhibiting anti-social tendencies, i pinched the book and basically taught myself to read by kindergarten. and then, you know, my early heroes were musicians and writers. the idea that you could have adventures and anti-social and make them legitimate by writing something beautiful about them. that concept took an early hold on me. i wasn't serious enough about anything to actually do any writing until '93. but when i was given the opportunity i did it and, you know, kept doing it. the whole business fills me with terror, frankly. >> hey. we know each other by now. >> yeah. >> let me see if rocco is up front. >> what was it about tony with big knives? >> they were never sharp enough. when he came over for thinking of thanksgiving i was going to carve the turkey and he took over. thanksgiving i was going to carve the turkey and he took over. he was very short with me about how i wasn't taking care of my knives. >> saw you when you were just born. do you remember that? >> my relationship with tony has always been as a writer. he was such a powerful writer right from the start. >> he was on business in tokyo for the first time. and he was writing me a series of emails. he did one of those bursts. >> the jet lag wouldn't let me sleep, so i crashed late and rose early, plunging blindly down dark streets at all hours. the streets unbelievably dense with pedestrians, people hanging around, flashing neon, flapping banners. screaming signs, with pimpy young men. asian women in thigh-high boots and no one i mean no one would meet my eye with the direct gaze. i was the quiet american, hungry american, ghost, searching and searching for whatever came next. >> i loved it. i loved it, and my wife karen who was a book publisher was in the living room breast feeding the baby. i printed out the email and i went, karen, you have to read this. >> am i allowed to curse? does anybody curse when they are on this? i read it and i just went, that is awesome. i was, like, okay, i'm going to make him an offer that he basically can't refuse. he came back and we sat down. i said joel tells me you have a lot of stories. and he goes i have so many stories i'm so excited to tell them. he said i already have a title it. what's the title and he said "kitchen confidential." >> what do you think about tony bourdain anyway? >> what do you think about that guy? he is cool, huh [ baby cry ]. >> i don't think tony was afraid of failure. and that was hard wired. he was the kind person who thought, well, you know what the [ bleep ] let's just try it and see how it turns out. >> anthony bourdain worked as a chef for 28 years reveals surprising and disturbing trade secrets in a book called "kitchen confidential." >> chef anthony says the truth about bread in a restaurant, how you should prepare meat when you order it and the truth about fish that make you sick. >> i was in a cranky mood after my last restaurant closed and felt no reason not to tell the truth about a business i both love and have mixed emotions about. >> "kitchen confidential" is a memoir of tony's life in the kitchen and the salty adventures that he had with his cooks. it was kind of lawless. you know, a lot was broken as tony used to say. >> as the executive chef at la'el, he found success in a full blown heroin addict at an early age. >> i had a dope problem, a cocaine problem. by '88 i pretty much cleaned up my act. the dietary supplement that every chef needs, i take around ten of these a day. it's of an aspirin tylenol mix. called crunchies. >> so you didn't fire him? >> i didn't fire him. i didn't know it was being written. i didn't know it was going to be published. one day i arrived at the restaurant and i said what happened? you're [ muted ] kidding me. >> i was told today i guess the 12th of this month it will be number 7 on the "times" best-seller list. >> it was on 20 wasn't it. >> i'm getting congratulatory calls and telling me i have a best seller. it's scary. >> very exciting. it's wonderful. >> yeah, it's just anything that happens to me on that door i'm suspicious of. >> he was always behind in the rent, always behind his you know payments and living from paycheck to paycheck. like in a pressure cooker. so when there was this opportunity, he was ready. >> announcer: this cnn film, "roadrunner: a film about anthony bourdain." brought to you by expedia, made to travel. as an expedia member you earn points on your travels, brought to you by expedia, made to travel. ," brought to you by expedia, made to travel. by expedia, made to travel. of i so you can go and see... or taste or do absolutely nothing with all those bubbles. without ever wondering if you're getting the most out of your trip. because you are. making a home means making decisions. lots of them. so, we promise to be here, with prices you'll love, seasons change, but our lowe's price prose it. is everyday. shop fall at lowe's today. psst psst. [sfx: monster roaring and people screaming] allergies don't have to be scary. flonase sensimist stops your body from overreacting to allergens with a non-drowsy, ultra-lightweight mist. psst psst...flonase. all good! it's the all-new subway series menu! 12 irresistible new subs... like #9 the champ. rotisserie style chicken double monterey cheddar. the champ is truly made for a champ. gee, thanks chuck. who said anything about you? it's subway's biggest refresh yet. football, housewives, football, housewives, football, housewives... whoops. oh no... the housewives are on the field. i repeat, the housewives are on the field. i just want to talk! yeah! who flips a table? get your tv together with the best of live and on demand. call 1-800-directv ♪ ♪ by the time i was 43 i really thought that i had had all my great adventures, that the entertainment and excitement segment of the program was long over. >> look! >> that was cool. >> i was comfortably ensconced in secure digs with a wife who still remarkable bly found me to be amusing on occasion. >> what are you doing, giving interviews? >> i had a job i loved and successful restaurant and i was alive for christ sake, i was still around. >> i don't cook at home. i just -- i'm too -- i would love to tell you, you know, i go home and cook fabulous snackies for my wife. i would be lying if i told you that. it's more like honey, call out for chinese. there are, it turns out, a million ways to say suck my blch and like all great performances it's about timing, tone and delivery. like cooking. thanks. [ applause ] you know, all the tv chefs are so cuddly and adorable. maybe i'm the anti-or something. you know, i don't know. >> for me it happened overnight. i mean, one minute i was a cook at restaurant and not a particularly great one. and the next i was an author and was literally overnight. fell in my lap. >> i'm selling books now. >> with me now is anthony bourdain author of kitchen confidential. >> chef anthony bourdain. >> here is anthony bourdain. [ cheers ] >> what do you think about these guys like emerald lagasi on the food network? >> you're asking me to kick santa claus in the crotch on television. >> apparently brad pitt will be playing me in a movie. >> it's tomorrow. >> oprah. >> no! you're kidding me. >> this is anthony bourdain. his book "kitchen confidential" is a "new york times" best seller. >> i was born to cook. i love satisfying people's appetites. next i'll be doing lambata with emerald ♪ >> oh. >> i hate myself.♪ >> oh. >> i hate myself. ♪ ♪ >> oh. oh. tony bourdain rocks. what's up, man? everything good? >> life is good. >> yes, yes, yes. >> come here, girl. get in here. how are you doing? this is tony. tony welcome we're having a good time. >> the next one, no i'm doing something called the cook's tour basically i travel around the world eating exotic food having adventures in the far east, and africa and south america with a crew chasing me. >> hey, john, come here. >> you know, my 15 minutes of quote, unquote, fame, you know when that's over, i will be perfectly comfortable with that. if not relieved. i think even relieved at this point. >> when i met him for the first time, he had made a splash with "kitchen confidential." i had read that he had a contract to write a second book called the tour -- "a cook's tour." and i called him. >> yes. >> and i said, hey i'm a producer. would you ever consider making "a cook's tour" into a series? and he was like, whatever, yeah, sure. he was very nonplussed about the idea of doing anything on television. it was not what was on his mind. a week and a half later chris collins and i went up to la' e will. >> we found tony shot a demo with him and had a conversation with him. >> and it became immediately clear he had never traveled. >> his travels were in his head. >> growing up as a kid, you know, i watched "the crimson pirate." they were all pirates and bad guys having great adventures. >> tony's view of the world emanated from books and from films. almost in an encyclopediaic way he could grab all these references. and i think he was excited to go on this journey to see if the reality actually matched the imagination. >> our first journey was for six weeks. and, remember, we had only spent one day with tony leading up to that moment. the image of tony, i mean, it was i think a guy who at that moment was very unsure of what was about to happen. >> good flight? >> you know, i'm looking at a strange and unpredictable future. in a tough business. with rules that i'm not completely familiar with and when i become familiar with them, i -- you know, i don't know whether i like them that much. >> we hit the road together. just the three of us. >> lydia and i had just gotten married. and then we had tony, a guy who we barely knew. it was like three idiots trying to figure each other out. >> the first shoot was japan. we didn't know what we were doing. he definitely didn't know what he was doing. and tony immediately became uncomfortable and awkward. >> what we would find out very quickly was tony was actually a very shy human being. and to get him to make eye contact or to interact wasn't his natural state. >> that compounded by the fact that we were in japan, being sort of led into scenes where there was a lot of kind of formality involved. you know, all of those factored in to him being quiet, which was like the worst possible thing. >> oh, wow. spectacular. >> i mean, chris and i went back to the hotel and basically looked at each other and said, like, we're [ muted ]. sticky nn and the cutest boxed lunch we have ever seen. and you can find him right now on upwork.com when the world is your workforce, finding the perfect project manager, designer, developer, or whomever you may need... tends to fall right into place. find top-rated talent who can start today on upwork.com this labor day, we want you to enjoy all the fall things, without worrying about affording all the things. so, we promise to have your back, if you just promise to take in the fall colors. seasons change, but our lowe's price promise is everyday. shop fall at lowe's today. come on guys, eat your food, let's go! i wanna taste your banana pudding, you taste my banana pudding. it's on. it's on. it's on. 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(vo) with 5g ultra wideband in many more cities, you get up to 10 times the speed at no extra cost. get verizon business unlimited from the network businesses rely on. . chris, chris, take a picture of me and lydia as we come back with the sun behind her pointing up the mountain towards the farmhouse as we walk up past the yellow triangular sign. thank you. okay. here we go. okay. i mean, to be honest i'm not total alone because somebody is clearly shooting this i love the desert scenes i'm alone in the desert who else's footprints are those, one of those things. but, look, this is pretty cool. it does feel pretty cool to be walking -- i'll tell you this i have a lot more fun walking forward than the camera person is walking backwards, i'm sure. was that a groan? >> yes, it was. >> we went from japan to vietnam. that's when things started to kick in to a different gear. >> my good friend philippe hold called on me semiunexpectedly. last night. we're ready for our adventure. >> i joined them on the first trip in vietnam. >> and he was enjoying himself and being less cynical. >> floating starbucks over here. i want a double latte mochaccino, please. it's great. kicks the shit out of starbucks. >> i love vietnam. maybe it's a pheromone thing, like when you meet the love of your life for the first time. she just inexplicably feels and smells right. you sense that given the opportunity, this is the woman you want to spend the rest of your life with. >> we had common desire to spend time in vietnam maybe forever. that was hour secret bond. and of course the movie "apocalypse now" was one of the top three movies in his life because it combined so many things in his life, vietnam and the war and the world out of darkness. >> we started doing all of this self-indulgent film references. i suddenly realized, wait a minute, this film-making thing can be fun. you know it's a big crayon box. we can actually enjoy this. >> why am i here? am i insane? >> you know, he used to say don't ever let me do tv. the thing is like if i ever do tv, shoot me. and, you know, at first it was awful. >> where do cooks come from? the answer to this and other questions to follow. >> and then very quickly -- he's such a good student and so friggin' smart, he, like, figured it out. >> chris, lydia, i love you. you know that, right? but i got one night in bangkok here, not every 24 hours. you want to do a whole god damn show in 24 hours. fine. forget about blocking out, no plan. you better be fast. i want to have a good time. we're going to roll, and if you don't get it, you don't get it. catch it in editing as we like to say. >> what started to grow at that moment was this understanding of tony, you don't need to tell us everything. you need to experience this and ask questions. that's how we're going to learn from this place. it's not you being a travel guide. it's you being open to this experience. >> oh, jesus, look at this. look at this thing. look at the road popping out everywhere. >> whoa. >> come back, come to papa. if there is any dish that comes closest to perfection, this is it. you know this is bumping right up against the walls of heaven. oh, man. we've reached the mountaintop. >> i'm thinking what do i want? it would be nice to buy something that would fulfill some hollow part of my soul. but i can't think of anything. maybe a car will do it. i don't know. i mean, shit, my rent is paid, not a loan. it's spectacular. i mean, i -- i'd like to live like a normal person. that was always my thought if i get enough money i'll be able to live like a normal person. but i don't even know what that is any more. [ phone ringing ] >> i read "kitchen confidential" at that time, and i called him. and i invite him to have lunch with me because i want to meet the man. and he shows up with a tv crew. >> i thought, this was a jackpot. this was one of my idols, where i was just absolutely freaked out. incredibly sophisticated, refined, clean, beautiful, impeccably presented. the craft performed at its highest level. >> when i meet him, i don't expect him to be so articulate. and he has amazing good manners at the table. >> i think the person that people experienced on camera was someone who seemingly had this incredible ability to engage with anybody he came across. there was that persona that was created over time. >> but that burned off and it became tony. >> all of the places that i'm going, i'm really excited about this one. going back to the ancestral homeland and maybe discover some things along the way. so this is my father and a little friend in france. a little oyster village. this is one of my favorite pictures also of my brother and i in the same spot. we didn't do a lot of travel when we were kids because, i mean, my parents were not rich. we did go to france a couple times because my dad had relatives there. >> i'm nervous. who ever thought we'd do something this goofy? >> this is an oyster boat similar the one on which i had my first oyster. >> i blame my first oyster for everything i did after. my thrill-seeking, my hideous screw ups in pursuit of pleasure. i brilgdsed -- bridled bitterly at the choke hold of love. >> outstanding corporal. >> pet lent view of my bourgeois parents who committed the unpardonable sin of loving me. >> i'm glad we got the chance to do this. >> me too, yeah. >> okay. >> call. >> yeah, let's shoot another one, yeah. take two. >> two years ago frequent flier miles meant nothing to me. today miles earned are the pathetic milestones. >> take turn. >> we would write the voiceover in the beginning, like we need context for what we are seeing, some summary of the scene. >> later on another swing through southeast asia with layovers here and there. first stop, singapore, a quick business dinner with my editor. tan? >> tanabalon. >> tony would come to the narration he would like what is this shit? he was start skrachgds things out. first started with a word or two here or sentence or two here. you know then he became man maniacal about it. he understood this is an extension of me, this is an extension of my writing. i better write in my voice. you know, otherwise this is going to -- i'm going t