of his own. what is your job? >> he redefines an old role for a new generation. >> there's this toxicity, this masculine idea of what a man is. >> a father. >> i really wanted a reminder of what's important to me. >> who with the vice president is marking many firsts. >> this is very emotional to be able to do this. >> while still trying to make time for each other. >> we're not each other's chief of staff. we're husband and wife. >> it's the opportunity of a lifetime for the former entertainment lawyer who gave up his job to support his wife. >> men need to support women. >> in this series we talked to people in politics and pop culture and find out what it's like to be them. now being the second gentleman. what's it like to be the first second gentleman? >> i'm only the first second gentleman because the country elected the first woman vice president. so i look at it really mostly in that lens. i'm here because i'm her husband. i'm here to support her. >> so help me god. >> but he's also rewriting unspoken rules and roadmaps largely designed by men for women. >> there's a library at the residence where we live and it's i think every single book ever written by a vice president about a vice president about the vice presidency and our favorite one's title is "vice presidents and second ladies" and think about it. we're going to need a new book because there's now a man in this role and i say half jokingly i may be the first. i better not be the last. >> what do you think the title or headline of that book should be? >> it should not even be a big deal that i'm a man going forward. we need to have more women in leadership. there needs to be more women in government, more women in the business world, more women in communications, more women in the military, you name it. so i want to be in a world where this is not unique, this is not unique at all. >> but for now it is unique which means deciding whether he'll take on some of the traditional duties like part planning and holiday decorating that americans think of when they think about first and second ladies. picking the china patterns and arranging the dinners and doing more of the social aspects, do you do any of that? >> things like that we do together, my wife and i, the vice president, but because of the circumstances in which we took office and the time, really mostly focused on covid and vaccinations and just fanning out across the country to see what was going on. a lot of what i did was listen. a lot of small group meetings, hear what was happening right on the ground and bring it back to the administration. so it hasn't been a lot of time for the ceremonial part. maybe there will be moving forward. >> was there any part of you that thought well, i better do the ceremonial stuff because that's what a woman would do? >> well, i don't want to genderrize it. i think we're a married couple and we do a lot of these things together. so if there's things that we need to pick out or decorations or if we're having an event and i'll give my input, but it's how we are as a typical married couple, what we would do in our other life. we look at things together. we pick it out and we're both busy and we move on. so i'm not trying to make it where this is my job. >> what is your job? >> first and foremost, it's to support her. we work in an office called office of the vice president and in office that you're sitting in is really here to support the vice president, support the president, support the administration any way we can in addition to being her husband. >> since abigail adams in 1779, a vice president's spouse was a woman. emhoff calls one of those women his mentor, now first lady jill biden. was there a crash course when you came into this? i know there was no manual to be the second gentleman because it didn't exist before, but to be the second spouse? >> there's no manual and dr. biden said as much to me because i did ask her you had this role. what can i expect? she said first you won't believe me if i told you and, two, it's just going to be different for you because you're a man and she's a woman and you're the first one and the times we're in right now, but just be yourself. be authentic and support her. >> the term second lady was first used in the 1890s, but there wasn't much of a public role until pat nixon started traveling independent of her husband to promote causes. there are now five living former second ladies, marilyn quayle, tipper gore, lynne cheney, jill biden and karen pence. who did you talk to? >> i talked to mrs. pence. >> was she helpful? >> she was. we had a very nice conversation. >> what was the most important advice she gave you? >> she was very helpful having been in the residence right before. there's a lot of nonintuitive things that happen living in this type of situation that she was very helpful with. >> like what? >> just from paying the bills, how does food get in and you've seen a lot of the security, so just the basics of everyday life, very helpful on. of course, i've talked to our now first lady many, many times. i talked to tipper gore as well. >> what did she tell you? >> she had a great historical perspective on the residence and what it was like to raise a family there and just some of the -- just the history of it because i really wanted to get a sense of what i was getting into. >> emhoff has had a sense of what he was getting into from the beginning. >> we cannot delay or deny individuals their civil rights. >> he met the now vice president later in life when she was a rising political star and he was a successful corporate and entertainment lawyer. a lot of couples in politics, they get together young and they kind of work their way up the ladder together. you and the vice president met as adults, well into adulthood. >> yes. >> and she was already the attorney general of the state of california. >> yes. >> you never had anonymity with her, meaning as a couple from the minute you met, it was already a relationship in the public eye. >> not like this. >> not like this. >> people knew her. it was funny because she was living in san francisco at the beginning and i was living in l.a. and i'd been an entertainment lawyer for a long time. so we'd be in l.a. and people would come up to me, hey, doug, how's it going? she said how's everyone know you? it was kind of somebody here in this town before i met you. it was pretty funny to have had her see that. we were able to have a normal kind of trajectory on the relationship in those early days. we can go to dinner, go to movies and maybe a few people would come and say hi and take a picture or two, but nothing like now. >> he left his law firm in the days after the election and now has his own office in the white house complex. >> up there is the second gentleman wood cutout. >> where he displays proud possessions like this sign he says was given to him during the 2020 campaign made by a veteran suffering from post- traumatic stress. >> they presented me with the second gentleman sign. i said i can't take this. i haven't won. okay. if we win, i'm going to put that in my office. so promise me. >> tell me about this photo. >> this is the first flight that we both took on air force two ever. so the first flight ever was together and this was that moment after we walked up this flight of stairs, which is surprisingly steep and very windy, and, so of course, the whole way up you're thinking oh, my goodness, i better not trip or anything. you get to the top and it's that moment that we've all seen hundreds of times of presidents and first ladies and vice presidents and second ladies just doing that turn-around and here we are doing it. it was -- >> was it out of body? >> it was kind of one of those surreal overwhelming moments and there's no instruction manual for something like this. i just love her eyes. you can see the smile and just the pride. >> coming up -- >> let me show you this, probably one of my favorite spots here. >> -- other exclusive tour of the naval observatory grounds where the second couple loves and the second gentleman's tattoos. were you sober? >> yes. 24 hour protection. prilosec otc one pill, 24 hours, zero heartburn. yes, i need a trim. i just want to be able to cut the damage. we tried dove instead. so, still need that trim? oh my gosh! i am actually shocked i don't need a haircut. don't trim daily damage. stop it with dove. two new ihop lunch and dinner menu items for twice the goodness, twice the flavor, and twice the choice. sirloin salisbury steak and all-natural salmon. perfect for lunch or dinner. only at ihop. download the app and earn free food with every purchase. all across the country, people are working hard to build a better future. so we're hard at work, helping them achieve financial freedom. we're providing greater access to investing, with low-cost options to help maximize savings. from the plains to the coasts, we help americans invest for their future. and help communities thrive. ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ (vo) what can a nationwide 5g network from t-mobile for business do for your business? unlock new insights and efficiency-right now. allow monitoring of productivity at remote job sites, with next-generation bandwidth. enable ai cameras that spot factory issues in real time, using next-generation speed. and deliver ultra-capacity 5g coverage that's years ahead of the competition. t-mobile for business has 5g that's ready right now. this is really beautiful. >> yeah. it's a pretty amazing place. >> being the second gentleman means living here at the u.s. naval observatory built in 1893. this is run by the navy. >> yeah. this is owned by the navy and it was the home of the head admiral of the navy for all that time up until 1977 when the vice president's families started living here and we're on a naval base. this is a working naval base, most of which is the atomic clock where they keep the exact time of the united states. >> we went for a tour of the grounds steeped in history. >> so on my left is one of my favorite things. >> the swing? >> it's a swing and there's a plaque and it says, "joe loves jill." i have never sat on it because i don't want to break it. let me show you this. >> first of all, just this framing, it's so pretty. he took us to the family heritage garden, a quiet place of reflection that honors previous vice presidential families and their pets. oh, wow. >> remember president h.w. bush was vice president and they lived here for eight years. there it is, milly. >> are you scared that i actually remembered the name of his dog? >> i love it. sometimes if you just sit in here knowing that you're literally amongst history and it's such a great, beautiful, contemplative place to think about what's happening right now. >> how often do your kids get here? >> not enough, not enough. >> they're grown people. emhoff has two children from a previous marriage to kiersten emhoff. they divorced when their kids were still young. ella is now 23, a fashion design are and model in new york who became an influencer of sorts during the 2020 campaign, and 28-year-old cole is recently engaged and working in hollywood. how have they adjusted to being in the public eye? even though they aren't here, they're emhoffs. >> i'd say ella's in the public eye with her career. i think she's out there. i'm so proud of her. so her dad, i'm always -- i see what she's doing and i'm always just thinking about her as her dad. cole's doing his thing. he's getting married next year. he's also in the entertainment industry. so we talk a lot. i don't see him as much as i, can but we're talking at least four or five times a week facetiming, texting. one of the things i love, i'll be walking in and as we now know, the vp can text. so she's on the phone with the kids and i'll come in and she's laughing and i'm like who's that? well, it's ella or cole. it's normal. we want it to be parents first. as intense as this whole thing is, we want them to know we're still there for them as their parents. >> yeah, yeah. >> that's the goal. >> but it's hard to jump on a plane and go see them if they're having a bad day or have them come here. it's probably easier to have them come here. >> it is, but a lot of it is schedule, moving parts and they're adults. they've got jobs and busy lives. i'd say that can be the toughest part, but i'd say if i was still a lawyer back in l.a., i'd probably be saying the same thing. >> yeah, right. show me your tattoos. you talked about -- >> i'll show you one. >> this one is very simple. >> that's two. >> okay. it's the kids' initials. i got this shortly after kiersten and i separated because i just really wanted a reminder of what's important to me. it was cole and ella and i just wanted a visceral reminder of them. so cole is coltrane and ella is ella fitzgerald, very much into the jazz. >> were you always a tattoo guy? >> no. >> so what made you wake up one day and say oh, i'm going to get my kids' initials on my wrist? >> like many people who got tattoos, it was a whim. >> were you sober? >> ish. i just decided on the spur of the moment you know what. this is something i want to do. i just wanted to make sure i was focused on the most important thing in my life, which is the children, and they still are. >> so the other one you don't want to show me, but you can tell me. >> it's personal to the vp and i. >> it has to do with the year you were born. >> it's in reference to the year we were born, 1964. >> how many days apart are you? >> seven. it took us 40 some odd years to finally meet, but here we are. >> he takes daily walks on the grounds here. now with his position and the secret service detail that comes with it, it's one of the only places he can be outside and go alone. >> for instance, if i want to get a cup of coffee, you have to go with all the security. i can walk out here. >> by yourself. >> they're around, but i don't have to call them up and say hey, i'm going to take a walk around the residence. i love to walk. so a lot of times i'll just kind of walk around and just take it in and take in the beautiful nature here. >> do you have to tell them i'm going outside to take a walk or do you just go and they just know? >> they just know. you go right outside the gate. then you have to tell them and i joke it's almost like one of those movies like truman show where you can't walk past the other side. i'll have had family here and helping them out with their bags and maybe their car's 20 feet from the gate at the front. i'm like i'm so sorry. i can't do this. otherwise it's going to take 20 minutes and i've got to call up the crew and then all these cars show up. this is the only place when we're on these grounds not on the navy base side, but on the residence side that we can walk out here. now, of course, they know and they're watching. >> the political immigration debate has literally come to your doorstep right over there. >> yeah. >> the measure what we're doing to bus people from the rio grande valley or from the border region to washington, d.c. >> the area just outside the gates of the naval observatory made headlines after texas governor greg abbott sent busloads of migrants to the vice president's residence and left them on the sidewalk. republicans slammed kamala harris for mismanaging the border, addressing root immigration causes in central and south america is in her portfolio. >> it's shameful. these are human beings. she's are people, not pawns, and leaders, governors of states need to on focus on actually the issue at hand and not using these folks who are fleeing immense violence and cruelty to escape. >> he says it's his wife, the vice president, who helps him keep it real. so what does she call you again? >> dougie. >> that was a good imitation. >> it doesn't matter where we are, on stage, in front of the team, it's like dougie or my dougie as she's adjusting my collar and checking things out. >> but your official title is second gentleman. >> oh, that. sgot us. that's her when she's having fun with my title. >> do you say god bless you? >> yeah. >> being the second gentleman means taking the role seriously but not always taking himself too seriously. so almost two years in do you feel like you've got a handle on what this job is, what this new job is? >> it's evolving and it will keep evolving, but the constant is i'm here for her and that hasn't changed and that will never change. this is the vice president's garden or at least part of it. >> we'll have more from our exclusive tour of the naval observatory later, but up next, being a man who wants to help redefine masculinity. i don't know if you've heard this, but sometimes men have some fragile egos. >> i read about that. when you need it most. ready for your speech, general? 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>> i have a very healthy ego. i'm very confident and i also realize this was an incredible opportunity for the country to have the first woman vice president and to have a man in this role. so, yes, i love my career. i was very successful and i do miss it at times, but if i was going to leave, what better reason to leave than this and to support her? we talked about it and we made that decision together, that it was worthwhile me taking this pretty major step back from what i was doing. >> you use the word support and i think there are a lot of men who intellectually want to support their female partners and then when it gets to that point, it's hard. >> yeah. >> it's hard on your ego. you say you have a healthy ego. have there been moments like that? >> yeah. like i said, you have to put your ego aside and it's not about you. i will be giving speeches and one of the things i say is men need to support women. don't just think you're being supportive. don't just say you're being supportive. be supportive. it's the right thing to do and then, men, okay, you need to actually do it. don't just think you're doing it and the women in the audience start looking around smiling. sometimes it's hard and sometimes it's not what you expect, but it's the right thing to do and if i can set an example doing it, i'm very grateful for that. >> can women ever reach full equality without men thinking and acting the way you are right now? >> i think men need to look at women as equals and treat them and it's not an either or. it's not a zero sum game. when we lift up women, we're going to lift up our economy. we're going to lift up everything. it's not at the detriment of men. so that's what we need. >> there's still a bit of a stigma with the notion of men taking a step back and being openly supportive of a woman who has a bigger role and a bigger job than the man does. are you trying to intentionally destigmatize that? >> definitely, definitely. >> you think about it? >> i do. i do, not at the beginning because this was a no brainer, but now that i'm in the role and you really see like not all men naturally would do this and would push back and then there's this toxicity, this masculine idea what a man is that's out there that is just not correct and that's something that you really see when you're doing this and it's something i just want to push back on. >> how do you define masculinity? >> masculinity is loving your family, caring about your family and being there for your family and supporting them each and every way. no one would say i'm not tough and no one would ever accuse me of not being there and sticking up for those that i love, but i also care about people and am compassionate, empathetic. we're kind of mixing up this concept that if somehow a man shows kindness or empathy or consideration for others, that's somehow not masculine and that is just not okay. that's just not true. >> a lesson emhoff says he learned growing up in new jersey from watching his father michael. >> he's just such a strong role model for me and he was a woman shoe designer and he was strong and tough but sensitive and creative and artistic. i think my father is a mask lynn man. he just taught me it's okay to focus on your family, be there for your family no matter what. >> do you ever catch yourself thinking what would a woman do in this situation? >> not what would a woman do, but how would a woman be perceived or covered? i'm very mindful of that. i'm very mindful of like the fact i'm sitting here with you and the fact that sometimes we get attention for doing things that others have done and maybe didn't get the same attention. >> there was a great line that seth meyers used when your wife was on. >> my husband, doug and i, the first second gentleman of the united states. >> i do want to focus -- i feel like we're not focusing enough on what white men have accomplished with your rise. >> i know. we have jokes about that, too. >> we're laughing, but it should not -- we should get to a point where that's not funny. >> yeah. >> and it's not unique to have someone like kamala harris as a vice president. >> now you've been here for almost two years and you've obviously been around your wife as a public figure since really since you met. do you think that the credit self of your wife is more intense because she's a woman? >> i don't even focus on the criticism. i just focus on her impact. >> this is not about a specific criticism of her but what you see in terms of gender. >> yeah, probably, but so what? i'm focused on the flip side of that, the impact that she's making, the impact that i see every time i travel. i can't tell you how many young girls come up and tell me how much kamala harris means to them, fathers who come up to me and say i didn't vote for you, but my daughter is so inspired by kamala harris because she's the first woman vice president and all the work that she's doing. up next being jewish in this role. >> i got to tell you there were tears. it was very emotional to be able to do this. >> i'm sure. when tough pain hits, hit back with fast and powerful pain relief. advil provides longer-lasting relief than tylenol extra strength and treats pain caused by inflammation directly at the source. so get tough on pain and advil the pain away. what makes the l'oréal vitamin c serum different? new 12% pure vitamin c serum by l'oréal paris. when compared to vitamin c derivative only pure vitamin c can fight skin oxidation instantly. skin looks up to 70% brighter. the new pure vitamin c serum by l'oréal paris. ♪ hit it!♪ ♪it takes two to make a thing go right♪ ♪it takes two to make it outta sight♪ ♪one, two, get loose now! it takes two to make a-♪ get double rewards points this fall. book now at bestwestern.com. yes, i need a trim. i just want to be able to cut the damage. we tried dove instead. so, still need that trim? 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it's not a bad place to unwind. emhoff isn't just the first second gentleman. he's the first jewish spouse of any president or vice president. >> american jews everywhere and everyone else around the world watching, it is such an honor to be here tonight as the first second gentleman of the united states. >> this is a first. >> this is a messusah. >> this is an entrance to fulfill the commandment of writing the will of god on the door post of their home. >> this has a lot of historic significance. it came from a temple in atlanta in which martin luther king preached at. i knew when we moved here we were going to have one. we did some research and came to our attention that this historic mess usah existed. my parents, both kids were able to be here and participate in the ceremony of affixing this and i got to tell you there were tears. it was very emotional to be able to do this. >> i'm sure. >> it's the first one ever on the vice president's residence or the white house. being with my parents who are in their 80s, think about their lifetime. they were born in the '30s and early '40s and what they've seen and experienced, to be able to have their son be the first jewish person married to a vice president or president and then to just live openly as a jew -- >> proudly. >> -- proudly and openly, which is how i'm doing this. when they saw that, it really hit them hard. that was very emotional. >> what does it mean to you that you are the first jewish person in this role? >> something i take very seriously. at first when i came into this role, i thought being a man would be the biggest deal and it is. we've talked about that, but just kind of 1a is being jewish in this role and it really hit me early on when we did our virtual sadr and we had no idea what to expect. we just thought we'd do it and put it out there. tens of thousands of people saw it and immediately thereafter everywhere i went jewish people were coming up to me. i never thought i'd see the day when a jewish person was in this position just kind of living their life openly. it just meant so much. grew up in the suburbs of jersey, going to grandma's house in brooklyn for the holidays and i joke, but it's common experience. it's the plastic covering on the couch. it's the burnt brisket. it's my mom's electric menorah. it's my three-piece velour brown bar mitzvah suit. it's all those cultural experiences, you know, going to jewish summer camp and i was athlete of the year at a jewish summer camp. it's the stuff that resonates and it's not really talking about the religion or focused on israel. it's just focus on our common shared experience. >> he's held a menorah lighting here during hanukkah and hosted an interfaith group of students for rosh hashanah, the jew issue in year. it might be the big deal. >> it's that realization when we host groups and again, the representation of her matters so much. who we are has never been in here or these halls and it's just so -- it gets people. it's emotional. it's emotional for me just talking about it right now. >> even more so he says right now as anti-semitism is on the rise in america. >> anti-semitism is everywhere right now. it's literally out in the open. people aren't hiding it. they're saying the quiet parts not out loud, they're screaming the quiet parts right now. >> i can say anti-semitic things and adidas can't drop me. now what. >> we spoke just before kanye west's views spurred like wildfire, over a bridge in los angeles, a major highway in emhoff's hometown. he said no person of any faith should have to fear violence because of what they believe. have you been a victim of anti- semitism? >> it's interesting. i have been around it when people don't realize i'm jewish and a lot of times in the business, in my business career, i'll be in a room and people are having their drinks and talking and someone will make an anti-semitic remark not realizing that i'm jewish. >> what do you do? >> sometimes i would say something and sometimes i should have and i didn't depending on the circumstance. i look back now and i'm mad still. i wish i -- there's a few moments that i wish i would have said something, but you're young. you're in the business world and you just don't know how to react and that's why i'm always going to speak out and live the way i'm living right now. up next, the second gentleman on the road and what's next for the second couple. would you want to be the first first gentleman? of something with farmers. kinda creepy. ♪ we are farmers. bum-pa-dum, bum-bum-bum-bum ♪ among my patients, i often see them have teeth sensitivity as well as gum issues. does it worry me? 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>> every time. she'll do it tonight. >> are you her eyes and ears on issues you care about? >> not really. first and foremost i'm her husband. as professional couples do, tell me about your day, tell me about your day. but since i'm working in the administration, it's great. i do all these events i'm not her eyes and ears but it's like you're the vice president, i'm out there on behalf of this administration. and i'm going to tell you what's going on to turn it into action. >> he represents america on the world stage, too. >> i've done three solo trips abroad leading presidential delegations. >> what is that like? >> it's incredible. i'm just proud to represent my country. you're out there on behalf of the president of the united states representing the country. one was for the paralympics in japan, and at that time in covid i was one of the few people in the stadium. i really felt like i was there on behalf of the entire country. just overwhelming sense of pride, wearing that jacket and holding the flag, rooting on the athletes. >> is there ever like, wait a minute, i was an entertainment lawyer, now i'm leading a delegation. >> i go back further, i was a kid in little league, now i'm representing the united states. >> you never had political ambitions? >> no, i was a practicing attorney. i take it seriously, those skills you have as a lawyer, the research, the study, and curiosity, you have to bring that to the table. >> while his legal career is on hold, emhoff is wearing a new hat, professor at georgetown law. why did you want to start teaching in washington? >> i wanted to keep a toe in the legal profession, and when this opportunity came up, it was great. i always thought at some point i would love to teach law school at least part-time, and so yeah, it's a great way to stay engaged in the legal field, it's a great way to be around a bunch of smart, young law students on the way to being lawyers. as a lower for so long, i always thought if i got them right before they got to the firm, i could tell them a few things so when they got to the firm -- >> now you got to do that. >> it's been great. where is my jersey? >> he also gets fun assignments like representing his wife here at the annual women's congressional softball game, where i'm one of the announcers. it all comes down to this game. you're walking around, people are asking for selfies. what is the thing people say to you the most when you're out and about? >> thank you, thank the president. >> and your wife. >> let kamala know i say hi. some say we love ella. but it's always gratitude and it's good intel on what we're doing. it's breaking through. it's nice but i'm also using it as a way to get feedback. >> do you get honest feedback? >> yeah, i think people feel they can talk to me, maybe more than they could some of the others. >> how come? >> i haven't been in politics. >> speaking of politics, he's very careful not to get ahead of -- well, anything. >> we have an official guest, the first gentleman. back here, back here. >> 12 second ladies went on to become first ladies. would you want to be the first first gentleman? >> right now i'm just focused on being the first second gentleman, and that's all i'm focused on. >> focused on supporting his wife, the vice president, focused on representing his country, and focused on his role which has already earned him a place in history. with next-generation bandwidth. enable ai cameras that spot factory issues in real time, using next-generation speed. and deliver ultra-capacity 5g coverage that's years ahead of the competition. t-mobile for business has 5g that's ready right now. ready for your speech, general? 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