for a return to monarchy, maybe it's just simply we want somebody who rises above the messiness of party politics, and helps unite us. the old—school absolutist kind of ruler need not apply. modern america would want someone warm and inclusive — a leka, not a zog. the most successful monarchies are the ones that rule with an open hand. they're not aloof. they show their people that they're approachable, even lovable, and that makes them worth keeping. the desire for monarchy is an emotion, but it's also an equation, a measure of benefits against cost. america made its calculation — and whatever their virtues, i can't believe abraham lincoln, who never met one, would ever give a monarch the time of day.