Digital desk. When we put the top i can out there, of death, we saw how it resson stated with people. Yes, we were flooded with tweets and personal stories. Ill share a few. We are tweeting about memories, birth, showing photos of our kids. Death is the inevitable cycle of life. People are sharing and roger is poetic saying and a story we got this one from betty who was suffering from cancer so what about you, if you had a terminal illness, would you open up about it online . I thought about it. I think i would. In this day and age, you and i share so much much our lives with the Online Community, death i probably would want to share it to not feel alone and isolated. And maybe to tabling to the community about that. I wonder if its people with jobs like ours or we see a lot of celebrities or scott syme jobs, when he orcanicly tweeted about the impending death of his mother, how millions latched on to that. It created global empathy and awareness. How about you, would you turn to social media to open up about your last days. 75 of adults use social media and use it to update others as to what it happening. One topic is not easily scuffed, that is death and dying. Nearly 2. 5 million americans die each year. The majority due to chronic and terminal illnesses. It is a part of reality that many people want to talk about. Surveys show that they are waiting for someone else to bring it up. What i think is it if 30 have a metastasis why are not 30 of stories presented in Breast CancerAwareness Month about women and men with metastatic disease. It should be an equal ratio. They want the happy stories, the rah rah, and not from people like me that have the incurrable situation of taking chemotherapy for the rest of our lives and depending on that treatment. That is lisa, who appeared on the program kilogram Breast CancerAwareness Month. Shes used social media for six years. Now facing incurrable cancer she uses the Online Platform to share this chapter of her journey. More are finding social media a helpful tool. Through hash tags, pictures and blogs, supporters see it as a way to begin dialogue and allow people to deal with the issue of death at their own pace. Critics question the appropriateness, sharing such details in a public forum. So, does social media have a place in the conversation about death and dying. Helping to shab the discussion is david kessler, author of the book you can heal your heart, on skype is justin, creator of the series my last days, focussed on people who are terminally ill and refusing to give up on life. And david who has a blog. And jody has stage 4 Breast Cancer creating the hash tag b. C. S. M, Breast Cancer social media. Welcome everywhere. We see people ageing the passing the others on social media. Why are we seeing more discussion about the process and terminal illness and death now marathon ever on social media. Thank you for talking about it in the show. I appreciate it. I dont think we knew what our great grandparents knew. We dont know how to talk about it. We live in a world where the dead go around in white unmarked bands. We are looking for the town square. Social media is the new up to square. I was going to say, what is it about american culture. You said the grant parents had it different. What makes it tough to talk about things. We have become so youth oryetted. Death is ogsal. Theres something primal in us that grief must be witnessed. We want our life witnessed and death. You decided to do a series called my last days, why did you do that . We were looking around and we tend to procraftinate with everything, especially my generation. I didnt think we should procraftinate on living the life we life. I made death a messenger of joy. Maybe i can inspire people to live the life that they should and make death not so taboo, bringing light to it so to speak and make it inspiring. Thats how the show was created. You mentioned not making death a taboo. The reason we talk about that is the absence of healthy breeding. Its more to do with silence. Social media allows you not to be slept. This is a trending article. Thanks to the images captured during the photoshoot for the haves and have notes. This is actor john schneider. This was taken an hour after john discovered that his father had died. Thank you john for sharing the images with us. Speaking about sharing we have a blog by our guest david and deborah. Davids cancer video blog. David and deborah, you have shared this journey with all of america. What have you learnt about the empathy that it has engennedered. I think its amazing. The blog has had over 81,000 hits from 74 different countries. None of us get out of this alive. Its true all over the world. Its amazing how many people respond and say you know, you are teaching us things that nurse and physicians never told us during chemo and radiation, and we love your youtube blogs. Jody, you started b. C. S. M, you have a huge Online Community of Breast Cancer survivors, patients. How do you think social media is changing the way we discussed the issues. Its remarkable in the way that we can connect with someone that is affected with the same disease, whether its prime airy or metastatic incurrable cancer. And you may have looked before for months to find someone to have what you have, and right now all you have to do is get on twitter and type inment b. C. S. M hash tag and you can talk with 10, 20, 30, 40 women off the bat so its done a phenomenal job of connecting people. Thats what people with illness need. They need affirmation and connection. They need people who can understand and relate to other people. Is there draw backs to having conversations online. We perceive there will be but there isnt. People are kinder tan you expect online. We can be cruel, but not true around the topic, and we are hungry for information, lecturing around the world, grief. Com, all these things, its like she said, its with the connection. We yearn for it. The community is giving us feedback. And susan you are the creator of my last days. Something im curious about, the people that you talked to and interviewed, families that passed away, when it comes to the final days, what are the values that people treasure. What is really important in life to those who are near the brink of death. Its really interesting. They have said the same thing, which is its about family. Its about love, its about experiences. And its really just about conviction. All the material wants and needs are just gone. It really becomes about the moment that you are in now. Its like you are almost made clean. You are dispatched from everything in the world. Its always the same, which is really, really interesting. I couldnt agree more, justin. Living in the moment, right now, this is everything. I dont worry about yesterday or think about tomorrow. Because if i live really well today, then every yesterday is a dream of happiness. I look forward to this day. I love you. Its something about that that when you look at the topics, you think looking at death and dying, youll be sad and depressed. We take in our lives, we feel more alive than ever when we dont cut off this part of our lives. Theres something about it that makes me misty, i dont know what it is. I do know what it is. This is a question that probably never gets asked. How do you talk about dying online . Is there etiquette. Yo. We should be meeting people on the street and leaving our not dying, you know, it is what it is. Thats what we are doing. We need to get the people who are depressed to get on to social media as well. David and deborah. Social media provides is a source of support. People who feel their families are burnt. We have a great video coming from lizzy. Its a popup event where people talk about death, and have cake. I brought the death cafe concept to the united states. Death cafes have popped up in 34 state. They have no agenda, no ideology, but just open conversation. David, often the critic at social media creates superficial connections. Theres nothing like face to face conversations when it comes to building empathy. Whats the response to that critic. Thats changing. I think we are finding we can connect very well. If you think about it, when a person is dying and they reach out to connect and you go, dont talk that way, well focus on getting better. We leave them alone, we isolate them. If i can reach out and find another soul, the better. If i look at the fact some day ill die and you will die, we thick it will address the reality. When i let it in, it makes me go deeper into the moment. Let me connect with you, serve People Better and take the life in. Do you find that there are barriers that come down when you have the conversation. People feel at ease when asking questions that you may not know how to phrase face to face. People are forthcoming and just encouraged to talk about things they thought. With having their illness. One thing that i cant, you know, social media is not going anywhere. We are only just in the beginning stage of this kind of technology in our lives. I think the more humanely we weave it in to what we experience in a natural way, in a way that doesnt feel forced, and a way that is an extension of our personality, then worries about taboos, about death and etiquette and questions like that will cease to be relevant. Unless you have experienced a virtual hug in the midst of a crisis. You dont understand it. But i have been fortunate enough to experience that, the day we received bad news. And as i shared that with my friends, and they all the weeks and weeks. Virtual hugs every day. That is wonderful. It is wonderful. Theres nothing superficial about the connections that people make in what is called a Disease Community or an illness community. In fact, you will find that when we meet each other in person, the getting to know you process is accelerated. I have rarely connected with someone online where i met them in person, every time its been like its you, im glad to meet you. But you already know each other. What happens when the blogging and the tweeting stops, and you learn that the person with whom you are walking through the adjourning died. How does it affect the leading process. Well tackle the online legacy next. When i die, that represents the end of my journey. But then that represents the starting point of another journey for everyone else. What a wonderful purpose. Chriss message, his legacy is one that has already touched to many around the world. Welcome back. We are talking about our family is committed. Our kids have joined in the process. It brought mission and meaning. It will be honouring david with what we do. Its a legacy we leave for the grandchildren. A beautiful legacy and a beautiful note to end the show on. Thats all the time we have for this discussion. Thank you to all your guests for sharing your stories. Until next time, well see you