Noah cyrus and Billy Ray Cyrus featuring john batiste and stay human. And now live from a safe distance its stephen colbert. Stephen welcome to a late show. Im your host stephen colbert. Its mid july and despite our best quarantine efforts yesterday america set a new record for daily coronavirus cases. Way more than we starnt started quarantining back in march it st almost as if that celebrity imagine video didnt help. Should we try another one. Maybe sugar pie, honey bunch. Sugar pie honey bunch. If florida alone new cases over the past week outstripped the total count in most european nations, that is a shocking vacuum of leadership in a state that i will remind you has an entil canwe just plug in annto e of o old guys and put him in charge. This country has really the pooch. Thank you, general. All the people in charge who told us the pandemic wasnt a big deal are looking big dumb right now like oklahoma governor and chonky dracula kevin stitt, cuz remember trumps rally in tulsa, oklahoma full of unmasked open mouth screamers. Lots of people called it a terrible idea, said it should be cancelled. Not Governor Stitt. Were going to be very safe and we think its the right time. And my question back to all the folks that say you shouldnt have a rally, when is the right time. Stephen oh, oh, i know, when it wont kill the audience. Did i did i thank you. So anyway they threw the rally. 6,000 people shouted their aerial sized viruses at each other and Governor Stitt was there without a mask to huff it all in. And now to the governor, the stit stitt has hit the fan because earlier today he made this announcement. I personally get tested periodically throughout this whole thing. And got tested yesterday for covid19 and the results came back positive. So i feel, feel fine. I felt a little bit achy yesterday. Stephen well, i would feel achy too if i spent the afternoon banging my head against the wall going stitt you big dumbee, why did you do t you did it again, just like the time you drank that whole jug of crick water because your cousin said it was iced tea, damn you, you stitt for brain. That really gets it fluffy, doesnt it. What am i doing here. Oh my god, mi going to need a little advil for my neck, that i got to say, i feel a little achy breaky too. Stick around for noah and billy ray later by the way. Regardless, Governor Stitt, i hope you recover soon. Al pase wear bse are you now contagious and you might want to hide your face in shame for awhile. Now masks are still our best bet for controlling this virus according to cdc director and amish potatoe dr. Robert redfield. Here is what redfield said yesterday. I think that if we can get everybody to wear a mask i think in the next four, to six weeks we could bring this epidemic under control. Stephen super, all we have to do is slow some discipline. Shouldnt be a problem for the country that invited hot dog pizza. Now the cdc reporting this coronavirus Hospital Data is making the Trump Administration look terrible. But the Trump Administration is finally come up with a solution to the crisis, coronavirus Hospital Data will now be sent to the Trump Administration instead of the cd, c. And i believe we have some live video of the new Trump Administration covid Data Processing center. laughter . Stephen you see trump doesnt want us to know what the real coronavirus numbers are. He knows hes failed. Hes just like a kid grabbing his report cart card out of the mail box before anyone could see it but were going to find out how bad he is doing when we all have to make coffins in shop class. But there is some good news on the covid front because last night we found out that the moderna Coronavirus Vaccine shows promising safety and immune response results in a published phase 1 study but blah blah blah we have a vaccine. Give it to me. I want to eat unwiped groceries and finely film my special the late show say it and spraytacular live from the unventilated basement of a nursing home with special guest Governor Stitt. Of course once a vaccine does come out everyone on earth is going to want it. And to make sure everyone can afford it some Pharma Companies have made a no profit pledge. No pharma profit. Unless the vaccine also happens to cure erectile disfunction in which case they got to get their beaks wet and its not their beeks. And no pharma a no profit pledge is a noble gesture but some folks are sceptical because these pharmaceutical Companies Promise comes with a cav yet vaccines will be offered at no profit quote during the pandemic. Hmmmm, thankfully big pharma has come up with a way to reassure the public about their motives and it is all in their new ad. Are you worried about the future. Unable to sleep at night, afraid that Pharma Companies will put their profits ahead of your health . If you are concerned about the cost of a vaccine, ask your doctor about vacsalax, the only medication prove tone reduce anxiety about big pharma taking advantage of you in a National Crisis am you can trust vacsalax because of its mascot professor cashington. Side effects include legless rest syndrome. Crumble food, spontaneous beard spore sparrows, final contracting, big old pink face, gordon fisherman syndrome, scrotal yotus vaccine resistance. Full blown coronavirus and Dollar Dollar bills yall 6789 with covid raging across the nation donald trump held an Emergency Press kmps yesterday in the rose garden. Now traditionally addresses from the rose garden are not baldly political events. It is where you celebrate pardon the turkey and celebrate the rare champion turkey. But this was just another rally speech in which trump raged and attacked joe biden by name nearly 30 times. At this point hes just trying to talk biden out of his basement,s whata matter joe, afraid to come out and fight me in the searing Nuclear Fallout of public scorn . Fine, i guess ill be the only one mutating in the agonizing hell scape that i created. Trumps main argument is that biden was too soft on china. Biden personally lead the effort to give china permanent most favored nation status which is a tremendous advantage for a country to have, few countries have it. T the united sta have it never did. Stephen this is so true. The United States never received favored nation trading status from the United States. And when will america finally have an ambassador to the United States. Every other country gets one. Must be sweet, way to go joe. Earlier in the day biden announced an ambitious plan to combat climate change, so trump tried to scare the voters with it. They want to rejoin the paris climate accord. And they want to seek an even higher level. Mandate net zero Carbon Emissions for homes, offices and all New Buildings by 2030. That basically means no windows. Stephen no windows . What and how will windows carbon emitting. Did we find out donald trump has a gasoline powered venetian blind . Eric, quick, you pull the two cordy things and i will fire her up. Pull ou the choke. According to trump biden has his sights on more than just windows. Joe biden wants to send school choice, abolish educational standards, abolish in the suburbs, are you going to abolish the suburbs with this. Stephen abolish the suburbs. How desperate is he to scare suburban voters. Joe biden is going to borrow your weed wacker and never return it, okay. Hes going to rake his leaves over the Property Line in your yard. Hes going to tear down your seasonal flag of a kitten sitting in a picnic basket and then not close his recycling bin and thats why the raccoons are just going to take over. Im not running a [bleep] raccoon hotel here. But its not just joe biden. Trump also attacked the real enemy of democracy, people voting. These mail in figures, some democrat governor sends in millions of ballots all over the state. Who are they sending them to. Nobody has any idea. Theyre sending them to dogs. They actually have them sent to dugs. Stephen dogs. Well, its about damn time, for too long they have had castration without representation. Dog barker approved. Stephen we also got mores Catherine Herridge who asked trump about what he plans to do about the lag in coronavirus testing. What can you do to speed up the testing result time. There are different kinds of tests. There are tests that are very good, very strong. Where you send it to a laboratory. The best thing we can do is we are doing more and more of them is onsite testing. Will you push for more onsite testing. I like it the best. I mean i like it the best. It might not be as accurate by the way but i like it the best. Stephen i love tests that are inaccurate, like the one that said i have no cognitive decline. Perfect test. I love it. I love you, are you my wife. Who am i . Hide me, joe biden is coming for my windows. Dog trump has blamed china for the pandemic so herridge asked him what he is going to do about that. How will you hold the Chinese Government accountable for covid19. Youll see, youll see, its not for you, its for me. Stephen oh no, he has gone full dr. Seuss, youll see, youll see, its not for you, its for me. How will i punish president xi, that my friends is a mystery. With a sploot and a splort and a sklout and a frowt, i have no idea what i am talking about. Are you my wife . Trumps messaging on masks has been lets say unhelpful. And last night he managed to keep up his streak. Would you urge americans to wear masks . If its necessary i would urge them to wear a mask. Stephen powerful, it reminded me of Nancy Reagans antidrug campaign, just say no, if its necessary. Cocaine is delicious. Yesterday was also primary day in three states. Maine, alabama and texas. And some familiar faces graced the ballotsk like former white house physician dr. Ronny jackson seen here winning a stairing contest with a ceiling fan. Jackson left his post at the white house after allegations he was playing fast and loose with prescriptions earning him the nickname the candy man. Its true. Urban ledge legend say if you say dr. Ronnys name three times in a mirror at midnight, the drugs he gave you finally kick in. The reputation of being a pill popping daddy didnt hurt jackson too much because yesterday he won the gop primary runoff for a texas congressional seat. It helped that his campaign passed out free prescription pads. It was a rougher night for former attorney general and grandma saying young lady are you not leaving this house in a crop top. Jeff sessions. Yesterday sessions lost the alabama gop senate runoff. Thats it thats the end of Jeff Sessions political career. Ul but its too tiny. And to add insult to injury, sessions lost to trumpbacked candidate tommy tuberville, this is a stunning political fall. Sessions was the first senator to back trump in 2016. Trump never fore gave sessions for recusing himself from the russia investigation which is why trump backed tuberville. What shifts the story from sad to truly pathetic is that sessions never stopped loving trump. This is his Actual Campaign ad. You know, out of 100 United States senators i was the very first one to stand with donald trump. I knew he was the one to make America Great again and i will keep fighting for President Trump and his agenda. Im Jeff Sessions, i approve this ad. Stephen that is the saddest thing i have ever seen it is like a jilted lover wearing her x boyfriends hat. Dont take her back, carl. This loss has got to be a huge blow to Jeff Sessions, so here to tell us how hes handling it, please welcome former attorney general Jeff Sessions. Hello, stephen. I do declare the loss of my former seat in the great state of alamanto in Jefferson Beauregard sessions the 3rd that i have made a fateful decision. A world where i cant lick the boot of donald trump isnt one i want to be in. At least i outlived my integrity. Here i go. Im headed toward the white dont try to stop me. I wont. Ill do it. I believe you. Goodbye cruel world. I love you donald trump. Glub Glub Glub Glub glub glub. Jeff sessions, everybody. Weve got a great show for you tonight, Ricky Gervais is here. But when we come back, meanwhile. Youre not using too much are you hon . Charmin ultra soft is so soft youll have to remind your family they can use less. Charmin ultra soft is twice as absorbent so you can use less. Enjoy the go with charmin. Scratch that, baby, im grateful. Gotta say, its really been a while. Smile check everything off the list with supplies from 50¢. Get ready for school at target. Original crown molding, walk in closets. We do have a ratt problem. Round and round with love well find a way, just give it time. At least geico makes bundling our home and Car Insurance easy. It does help us save. Round and round with love well find a way, just give it time. Round and round what comes around, goes around. For bundling made easy, go to geico. Com a mobile plan that blows away those highpriced plans boost mobiles all new hrinkit plan the longer you stay, the less you pay. Watch your bill shrink to 35 month after just 6 ontime payments. Plus get a free lg k51 when you switch on our new, upgraded network. Boost mobile. When you switch on our new, upgraded network. Hi. Whats on your mind . In. Can you help keep these guys protected online . Easy. Connect to the xfi gateway. What about wireless data options for the family . You can customize and save. What about internet speeds that can keep up with my gaming . Lets hook you up with the Fastest Internet from xfinity. And now with our stores reopening, were putting Healthy Practices in place. Come visit a store today. Stop in or book an appointment online at a time that works for you. Now thats simple, easy, awesome. Ask. Shop. Discover at your local xfinity store today. Stephen welcome back, everybody, we are here with our friend mr. Jon batiste. Hello, jon, for the people at home didnt get to hear just now is that you were being transported by aretha. Jon yes, oh my goodness. Her voice brings you to a place that you want to be. Stephen can you play a Little Something for us as we go to the next act . Jon yes, yes. Stephen thank you, jon, jon batiste, everybody. News, sling th p most of my timt topical cheese and taking the perfectly bald made it order Club Sandwich that is a monologue. I like to set aside some smaller scraps of news bread and forget them on the counter which develops mold which come tam natures the petri dish inhibbity irrelevanted bacterial growth, then purify it to make the unregulated path tub pen sellin of news that is my segment. Is quarantinewhile. Quarantinewhile. I wouldnt be doing my job if i didnt mention the latest online interweb viral sensation known as everything is cake. A clear trademark violation of the motto i live by, cake is everything. Heres a video by a turkish pastry master that will make you question all that you know to be true. Stephen that toilet paper really hits hem with me because many is the time i sat on the john and then been horrified to find out that were out of cake. But really what caught my attention was this one that looks exactly like a pizza but surprise, underneath is cake. Thats insane, who would even think to put pizza right on top of cake because certainly no one has ever done that when they were high last night. Kwn teenwhile, a u. K. Pub installed an electric fence at the bar to ensure patrons socially distance from it, nice try but the young idiots getting hammered, that electric fence is a deterrent,s that a a challenge, bro, lets grab it, next round is on whoevers heart stops first. Quarantinewhile, covid is caution drama in americas proud naked community because now neweddists re nudist resorts are requiring masks i will say if before this you would tell me nudists would be forced to cover up for public health, the mouth would not be the orifice i assumed was the problem. The requirements are rubbing nudists the wrong way, which is very common. Many are worried about tan lines and one long time nudist said that it is hard not to see each others faces because one of the things nudists are known for is the friendliness. Yes. That is one of the things that they are known for. Couple of the things they are known for but i try to keep my eyes up on the friendly part. Quarantinewhile, nintendo and lego have teamed up to create a lego version of the classic nes console, to be clear, its not playable. St a lego model of a tv and the game console. Its the perfect gift for that person in your life whose favorite part of baking is building the oven. The system features an 8bit mario on a scrolling screen recreation of a supermario brothers level. All in pieces of lego. So now when mario steps on the bad guys, he doesnt die but it hurts like hell. Quarantinewhile, burger kings latest sustain ability effort is to reduce cow farts, here is a free tip, you want to make sure the cows fart less, dont feed them burger king. The folks at bk are tweaking the cows diets by adding 100 grams of lemongrass to reduce methane emissions and the meat will be used in whoppers at some restaurants in austin, los angeles, miami, new york and portland beginning tuesday. And to promote it burger king workers are wearing these cool new buttons that say ask me about our reduced fartbeef. Quarantinewhile, researchers are turning to the animal kung dom to find treatment for stis, an mams are useful in the study of these infections because clad imia chlamydia hit wild koalas hard. Oysters get herpes, and dolphins get again tal warps which explains pixars new sequel avoiding nemo. Well be right back with Ricky Gervais. Blarnlings above the earth and tracks your distance underwater and tracks your activity and tells you which direction youre going and has an app that measures the electrical waves traveling through your heart otherwise known as an electrocardiogram. So just to reiterate this. Watch. Tells. Time among other things . Im sexy and i know it t od hersheys. The original cookies n creme. To sleepy smudges. To showerskipping. These days call for a quick clean. Luckily, help is still one wipe away. Love, neutrogena®. Introducing new best foods drizzle sauce craveworthy flavors you can drizzle, dip and dress to make home the best restaurant around new drizzle sauces from best foods were on the side of food. Sorry im late, everybody, and apologies for my appearance. You look fine. We were just talking about yeah, right. I look like a wanted poster. I didnt have time to get my beard routine in this morning, so. What beard routine . Ah. Well, the key is maple nectar. Gives it that sheen. Is there something wrong with my screen . Mnhmnh. Jamie, what are talking about . Youre right, alan. We should be talking about bundling home and auto with progressive, not this luscious mane of mine. [ laughs ] jamie, do you know what a beard is . Stephen welcome back, ladies and gentlemen. My guest tonight is the Emmy Awardwinning comedian you know from the office, extras and hosting all of those golden globes. He currently stars in season two of after life please welcome to a late show Ricky Gervais, hello, Ricky Gervais. Hi, how is it going . Stephen its fine, how is it going with you . Yeah, good, cant complain. Stephen really . Well, kz cant complain. Well, i can, but i wont, not when when theres nurses doing 14 hour shifts, i dont think its right for me to complain. Stephen okay. And also if im being honest, i sort of prefer it. I dont like people coming to the house. I dont like getting dressed up to go places. Stephen do you like people in general . Do you like people even if you go to them . Are you a fan of people . Well, i prefer animals. Nothing nothing against people. I dont i dont want to have to deal with them. Like. Stephen youre not going to actively attack people but are you not going to waste your time defending people. I like this, this is better than having to get dressed up and go to the studio, not that i get dressed up. Stephen no, are you wearing what i always weark a black tshirt. Thank you for dressing up, i assumed if i saw you at home you would just be naked because that is the only way down from what you usually wear. I am naked from the waist down. But listen, the reasons why is i dont look good in anything. I could have a handmade, made to measure armani suit and i still look crap. So i just go for comfort. So thats why, so this sort of suits me. I made sure there was enough food in the house for three months. Stephen thats good. Yeah. But its funny, well, because i saw on the news the lockdown was coming. And i saw people fighting in supermarkets over toilet rolls, so buying hundreds who cares about if armageddon, if it is the end of civilization, honestly, my would swap my last rolls for a bottle of wine, who cares, listen, if its the end of the world i would rather be drunk and wipe my ass on the curtain, why was that the first thing that people thought, what were they why were they so scared, we have to clean up, we have to clean up. Its likes going to die. Stephen my thought was you dont own a shower . Yeah, exactly. Suddenly the bidet is popular again, have i never used one in my life, i dont know what they were thinking. Maybe theyre worried about getting into heaven and maybe theyre worried about their. Stephen wait, are you implying, and again just showing how much you love people, are you implying that the christian tradition involves toilet paper in some way, that nether hygiene is show related to st. Peters check list . I dont know. Stephen its not. No, i dont think. Stephen its not. I think, i think saltan satan sch more concerned with the state of your ass. Stephen sure. You know what god is concerned with . Wine. Hes very upset if there is only water. He turns it into wine. So right there, ricky, the two of you agree on something. Come on over to the winning team. Yeah, well, i know, i know. You want me to you want me to find god. Stephen i dont nesesly want you to. Do what you want. Live and let live, i say. I am just saying there are appealing aspects to it. Maybe he doesnt want me to find it. This is a big house. I have looked everywhere, i havent found him yet. He might be here, you know, he cant prove the nonexistence of something, so he might be here and if he didnt want me to find t i wouldnt find it. If are you an all powerful being, are you the best i would think in the universe. So i might be looking and i might have looked in one room and he is watching me. And when i leave that room he goes in that room. You know what i mean. Stephen sure. If god doesnt want me to find him, im not going to find him. Stephen you said the coronavirus has made you a more moral person. How so . Because i dont have to lie now to get out of work and social occasions. I can just say no, im not doing it because the virus. You go oh yeah, fair enough. Well someone said to me oh, can you come to my crist everyoning or i go oh, i cant, im giving blood at the orphanage. And so i felt bad about that. But now i justno, im toot d r i will die. I cant come see you and they go yes, fair enough. Stephen thats a terrible lie by the way. Im giving blood at the orphanage. That paints a very strange picture, i have got to say. Oh no, were just spraying it around, were not putting it in bags. Im trying to teach these orphans that it could get worse. Imagine a strange man came to give blood. St not even a lot have died because my. Stephen thats t have i got to do that today rather than come to your cristening. Exactly. By the way we have skipped over this, but what is your drink of choice. You say that you have, the first thing you did was stock up on alcohol, what is your drink of choice, what is your. It st the evening so i have a little beer. This is a little ipa and then i will probably go on to the red wine late we are my meal. Stephen okay. So yeah. Stephen you dont do the spirits. I like a whiskey but i think you have to do that very sparingly, christmas, when there is, no, im a little bit scared o being that guy that drinks whiskey, yeah, no, its too frightening. Stephen okay, sure. So you have a dependency but a very soft one. Yeah. Stephen we have to take a quick break but stick around, everybody, when we come back ricky will give us a blow by blow detailed description of what will happen to his body after he dies. Worth the wait. Powerful sunscreen . Yes. Neutrogena® ultra sheer. Superior protection helps prevent early skin aging and skin cancer with a clean feel. Its the one. The best for your skin. Ultra sheer. Neutrogena®. Wow. Jim could you tipop the hood for us . . There she is. Turbocharged, right . Yes it is. Jim, could you uh kick the tires . Oh yes. Can you change the color inside the car . Oh sure. How about blue . Thats more cyan but. Jump in the back seat, jim. Act like my kids. How much longer . Exactly how they sound. Its got massaging seats too, right . Oh yeahhhhh. Oh yeahhhhh. Visit the mercedesbenz summer event or shop online at participating dealers. Get 0 apr financing up to 36 months on select new and certified preowned models. The are many tootte the, w onehoiuse . Fo healmo than even the leading multibenefit toothpaste. Crest. New force flex plus, bright colors febreze freshness. Its like walking into the Chocolate Factory and you won a golden ticket. All of these are face masks. This looks like a bottle of vodka. But when we first got these, we were like whoa [laughing] my threeyearold, when we get a box delivered, screams mommys work mommys work. With this pandemic, safety is even more important to make sure we go h well the names have all changed since you hung around but those dreams have remained and theyve turned around whod have thought theyd lead ya back here where we need ya welcome back, america. It sure is good to see you. Stephen hey, everybody, were back with americas sweetheart Ricky Gervais. Now you are in season 26 after life, a show let me get this list, created, wrote and directed. And now for those out there in our audience who arent familiar, and none of them arent familiar but just humor us for a moment and explain what the show is about. Well, i play a guy who love of his life, his wife dies of cancer and im angry and de pressed and suicidal. Funny stuff, right. Stephen so far. And im going to kill myself but the dogs hungry and that gives me long enough to decide okay, if im going to live like this for awhile, im going to pirn the world. Im going to start sayinwhant. Dn kill myself, i was going to be dead anyway, sow treats it like a superpower, that is the sort of high concept it is a study in grief but it is really funny, we sort of live vicariously through me being able to say what i want. He says all the things we like to say in situations but he mustant because we are worried about being popular or our comeuppance but he doesnt care, that is how it starts. Season 2 carries on with that but he is strying his best now. Season one him ghr shock, anger, denial. Now he is going through negotiation, saying okay, if i am going to live, why, what is in it for me. What it asks the big question, if you lose everything, is life still worth living, so thats, you know, the premise. Stephen there you go, job, the book of job. Is it . Stephen yeah. Seveverythings taken away from him and he is told by his neighbors, essentially, and die, and he wont do it. Well, thats sort of, well, that is great. This guy, mo no, no, it is he thinks he has lost everything and he is an atheist sow hasnt even got that to fall back on. He knows his wife isnt in heaven looking down on him. And so he says you know, i w to be with her. And his brother in law says that doesnt make sense, you dont even believe in and after life, and he says no, i know shes nowhere but i would rather be nowhere with her than somewhere without her. So that is his choice. He dont want to live without this, this relationship. And so it is about healing. It is much more about healing. But there is spiritual knit it because hes got to find a reason to li and so yeah. Stephen if there were ar paradise, just imagine there were a paradise, we will get to hell in a moment but if there are heaven, for you, what would that be . Have you ever given that any thought. I know what it would be. Stephen what. It would be me, it would be running around pling with dogs, i think. It would just be me with animals. Like a disney movie. You know what i mean, when you when snow white opens the doors and all the birds come down singing to her, badge der bad gers, that would be heaven for me. And we are all drunk. Stephen and now hell, what would hell be, ricky . Have you given that a thought . Lots of things. There. The hoor, i n al cuz i dont believe in afterlife, i have nothing to fear, to me hopefully being dead will be like the 30 and a half billion years before is with born, i dont fear, that i dont really care. Stephen you dont have fear of the afterlife but do you have i assume you have daily anxiety. Oh, oh yeah. Oh, if i wake up, if i got an itch, i think its cancer, im going to die within a week, oh yeah, i dont like the idea of dying. I just dont mind being dead. Anxietld n have any onnight and they didn up, i wouldnt have a care in the world it is just going through that, and i dont care what happens to my physical body. Stephen lets end on that, ricky because i want to leave the audience with the knowledge that you do not care if they all die. laughter no. Stephen that is what you said, you said if everyone, if everyone just died in their sleep, you would be fine, that is what you just said. I meant everyone in history, as far as everyone whoever died f they died in their sleep, i dont want everyone to die in their sleep tonight. I mean if we knew, if that is the way that humanity, if every human who died, just died in their sleep, no one it would be great. And i dont care about my physical body. People are like what do you want to do with your body after you died. Stephen yeah, what do you want to do with youred aboutee after you died. I dont care, i would probably give it to medical science, to do some good, this they would cut me open and go what the [bleep]. What has he been doing. Its disgusting. Or i thought of another idea. Feed me to the lions. Like me being thrown into a lions cage in the zoo and people going is that the and you see the lions. I thought the idea of two lions eating me. And they have will about six feet apart, by the time im 78, they are killing it and imagine two lions. Stephen im afraid we must go. We must go. I want to hear more about what is going to happen mere with your carcass next time you are here. Recovered the after life is on netflix now, Ricky Gervais everybody. Well be right back with a performance by noah and Billy Ray Cyrus, thank youk ricky. Stay safe, dont die in your sleep tonight please. Rdue makeo. Get all your pet essentials right when you need them, with Curbside Pickup at petsmart. Just order online, drive up, checkin, and pick up. Did you know Liberty Mutual customizes your Car Insurance tada so you only pay for what you need . I should get a quote. Do it. Only pay for what you need. Liberty. Liberty. Liberty. Liberty. [10th gen intel bong] tonight, try pure zzzs all night. Unlike other sleep aids, our extended release melatonin helps you sleep longer. And longer. Zzzquil pure zzzs all night. Fall asleep. Stay asleep. And your friend says they dont want fries. Get them the fries. Or else, your fries. Will be their fries. Ba da ba ba ba cool . Drop the taco. Get in the car. Does this sentra feel like a compromise to you . Wait, what. . The handling is good, right . No compromise there. Nope watch this. Umm. Bbrie. Brie brie rear automatic braking. So if this Nissan Sentra isnt gonna compromise, why should you . Youre right atta girl. The allnew Nissan Sentra. With more standard safety features than any other car in its class. Lets talk about you say George Floyds death was a terrible thing. Terrible. Why are africanamericans still dying at the hands of Law Enforcement in this country. And so are white people, so are white people. What a terrible question to ask. So are white people. Stephen whoa, okay, i am not doing this any more. I did not sign up for this. It hersheys. The original cookies n creme. An extra 15 credit on car and motorcycle policies . Wow. Ok thats 15 on top of what geico could already save you. So what are you waiting for . Idina menzel to sing your own theme song . Tara, tara, look at her go with a fresh cup of joe. Gettin down to work early following her dreams into taxidermy oh, its. Tax attorney. I read that wrong, oh yeeaaaah geico. Save an extra 15 percent when you switch by october 7th. Give it up for tara to kiddo curls. Ays. When you switch by october 7th. To playgrounds reimagined. Were all finding new ways to soak up a little sun. But sunscreen is still a must. So grab the brand derms trust most for their families. Lets see. Its dry. Theres no dry time makes us wonder why we booked fifteensecond ad slots dries instantly and keeps you protected for fortyeighthours. For fortyeighthours. Ooh, im blinded by the lights stephen welcome back. Performing, young and sad, ladies and gentlemen, noah and Billy Ray Cyrus they say you should smile more darlin show your eyes more arent you satisfied . Im tired of tryna please some one who doesnt even care whats on my mind let me go, i dont need you to wipe my tears dont you know im only tryin to disappear . Dont wanna be young and sad another day longer dont wanna feel numb or mad and i know that you only want me to be happy but i still feel lonely tonight dont wanna be young and sad another day longer my sisters like sunshine always bringing good light wherever she will go and i was born to rain clouds when they blew the flame out blessed in our shadows so let me go, i dont need you to wipe my tears dont you know im only tryin to disappear . Na be yng and sd nanother day longer until i go under and i know that you only want me to be happy but i still feel lonely tonight dont wanna be young and sad another day longer another day longer, hey dont wanna be young and sad, t nna be youngad young and sad, dont wanna be young and sad, another day longer dont wanna feel numb or mad until i go under stephen our thanks to noah and Billy Ray Cyrus. Check out another song from them, as well as other great performances in our playathome series, online at colbertlateshow. Com. Well be right back. Stephen thats it for a late show, everybody. Tune in tomorrow when my guests will be w. Kamau bell, and the chicks. Captioning sponsored by cbs captioned by Media Access Group at wgbh access. Wgbh. Org captioning sponsored by cbs the late late show, oh, oh the late late show oh, oh its the late late show james good evening, ladies and gentlemen and welcome to the late, late show. Thank you for joining us this evening. E