[ light laughter ] President Trump met with the russian minister of Foreign Affairs on the same day hes being impeached. That is brazen naming it the missing wife. [ laughter ] wheel of fortune sidekick vanna white this week started a threeweek run as fillin host and let me tell you, it is chaos in the nursing home. [ light laughter ] what is she doing wheres pat . [ light laughter ] President Trumps campaign has released a line of lgbtq pride themed merchandise and then mike pence squinted so hard, his eyes healed over kfc announced last week that it will begin selling a fireplace log that smells like fried chicken. [ audience ohs ] [ light laughter ] perfect if youve ever wondered what your dog would look like on fire [ laughter and applause according to a new report, liam was the most popular baby name for boys this year tied for last, lev and igor. [ light laughter ] a man in asia recently proposed to a silicone sex doll but if you ask me, hes just using her. [ light laughter ] a nineyearold belgian boy who was on track to become the worlds Youngest College graduate has decided to drop out of school due to a dispute over his graduation date. And this is humiliating. Hes moving back in with his parents. [ light laughter ] officials in las vegas are searching for a person who has been placing miniature cowboy hats on the heads of pigeons [ light laughter ] hopefully to give them the key to the city. [ laughter and applause and finally, mcdonalds in the u. K. Is set to launch their first vegan meal next year its a happy meal, but only the toy. [ light laughter ] ladies and gentlemen, we have a great show for you tonight [ cheers and applause she stars as jo march in the highly anticipated new film little women, in theaters december 25th. Saorise ronan is back, you guys. [ cheers and applause you can see her in the third season of the Marvelous Mrs Maisel now streaming on amazon prime video. Alex borstein is joining us tonight. [ cheers and applause hes a funny comedian and actor whose first hbo standup special, dan soder son of a gary is available now. Dan soder is joining us tonight. [ cheers and applause before we get to all of our guests today, House Democrats unveiled articles of impeachment against President Trump. For more on this, its time for a closer look. [ cheers and applause seth in the run up to todays historic announcement, youve heard trump and his republican allies cycle through one obviously bad faith excuse after another. They complained about the private process. Then they complained about the public process they accused ukraine of meddling in the 2016 election they said the president was just worried about corruption in ukraine in general they said there was no quid pro quo at all during the first impeachment vote, they even accused the democrats of acting like soviets with a very stupid poster. [ light laughter ] i mean, look at how dumb this is it looks like the cover of an offbrand board game [ light laughter ] its like asking your grandparents for risk and they show up with something called chance. [ light laughter ] its fine its the same game. [ light laughter ] all of those arguments, of course, are lies in reality, republicans have no answer for one very simple question at the heart of this impeachment process is it okay for the president to pressure a Foreign Government to help him cheat in an election . And my favorite example of this came last week when republican congressman doug collins, the Ranking Member on the judiciary committee, was asked that some incoherent word puke you keep saying that the president was concerned about corruption, but in neither of those phone calls he mentioned the word corruption. Why didnt the president mention the word corruption and instead ask the ukrainian president to investigate the bidens well, thats almost like saying why dont you ask you know, frame your questions differently. He said this is what he wanted looked into. He said he said help us as a country, because were trying to heal weve had as mr. Jordan said earlier, and did a great job of it, we had just come off the mueller hearing. Which was most all of you covered and found to be a total disaster for what the impeachment narrative that democrats have been saying what were simply saying here is, is that the issue was what happened on that call . And then it became all these stories from the whistleblowers about all these things that supposedly happened. And since then, fact witnesses and even hearsay evidence has said no, thats not what happened seth what . Was any [ laughter ]hat glish . If you put those words into google translate, it would just give up. [ laughter and applause but that, that right there is a perfect distillation of where the republicans are right now. They dont have a coherent defense. So they just throw out a string of random buzz words as quickly as they can and hope people buy it in fact, heres gop chairman jim jordan at yesterdays house judiciary hearing, basically doing the same thing just speeding through a bunch of nonsense as fast as he can ambassador taylor recalled that mr. Morrison told ambassador taylor that i told mr. Morrison that i conveyed this message to mr. Yarmack on september 1st, 2019, in connection with Vice President pences visit to warsaw. Seth oh, my god, man are you reading the evidence or auctioning it off . [ laughter ] i mean, listen to him. He sounds like he should be talking to squirrels on a bench in times square. [ laughter ] now taylor said to morrison that yarmack told pence about his visit to warsaw. I mean, isnt that right, pigeon the pigeon isnt listening, but the the squirrel is. Oh wait, hes not. Hes eating a nut. But where did he get it . I dont see a nut tree how come weve been here nine months we dont know where this squirrel got his nut. [ light laughter ] now, compare that to the measured judicious tone of the democrats at the hearing yesterday, who presented a lengthy body of evidence and witness testimony placing trump at the center of a vast scheme to dangle hundreds of millions in taxpayer dollars to ukraine in order to get them to interfere in the 2020 election on his behalf. President trumps persistent and continuing effort to coerce a foreign country to help him cheat to win an election is a clear and present danger to our free and Fair Elections and to our national security. So, as it relates to President Trump, is he an incidental player or a central player in this scheme . President trump is the central player in this scheme. Seth and of course he is first of all, we have all the evidence second, i cant imagine trump is anything but centralpporng play else he could never be the getaway driver in a bank robbery hed walk in midheist and be like, i heard this is where the action is. [ light laughter ] also, also you guys, i think i just got towed. [ laughter ] and i think a key moment hitting that point home came in yesterdays hearing when democratic congressman Eric Swalwell and the Democratic CouncilDaniel Goldman laid out all the evidence placing trump at the center of this scheme who sent Rudy Giuliani to ukraine to smear joe biden President Trump who fired the anticorruption ambassador in ukraine, Marie Yovanovitch . President trump who told ambassador sondland and ambassador volker to ru to work with Rudy Giuliani on ukraine . President trump who ordered his own chief of staff, mick mulvaney, to withhold Critical Military assistance for ukraine President Trump wef president zelensky in the oval office President Trump who asked president zelensky for a favor . President trump who personally asked president zelensky to investigate his political rival joe biden . President trump seth oh, my god, the answer to every question was President Trump. I want to do one who stands like hes playing the Leaning Tower of pisa in a school play . President trump. The democrats diligently laid out every piece of evidence linking trump to this scheme and republicans rebutted none of it. The facts here are actually very simple yes, it was a quid pro quo and yes, it was to investigate the bidens and the basic truth is republicans in the white house just dont care. They want us all to just accept it and move on theyve already said as much was there a quid pro quo . As i testified previously with regard to the requested white house call and the white house meeting, the answer is yes what exactly did you hope zelensky would do about the bidens after the phone call . Exactly . Well, i would think that if they were honest about it, they would start a Major Investigation into the bidens. Lets be clear, what you just described is a quid pro quo. We do that all the time with Foreign Policy and i have news for everybody get over it. Seth get over it these guys are such ass[ bleep ] they talk like dumb truck stop bumper stickers. My other ride is your mom, get over it. [ laughter and applause but thats their real argument you can pretty much ignore Everything Else they say all the process, complaints, the buzz words, the brain vomit. The republicans argument is simple we can do whatever we want, get over it. Well today, House Democrats responded by telling the Trump White House that they will definitely not just get over it. An historic day on capital hill the house announcing articles of impeachment against the sitting u. S. President donald trump. Two articles, specifically abuse of power and obstruction of congress to the constitution and to oury country, the House Committee on the judiciary is introducing two articles of impeachment charging the president of the united states, donald j. Trump, with committing high crimes and misdemeanors seth thats right, today democrats unveiled two articles of impeachment against President Trump. And if you ask me, he got off easy remember, the guy also obstructed justice in the mueller probe, violated the constitution by enriching himself, inflicted human rights abuses on Migrant Children and directed an illegal scheme to pay hush money to cover up an affair its not even hard to find the crimes with this guy its like a wheres waldo where waldo is right in the middle of the map with a giant bag of cash in one hand and giving you the finger with the other one. [ laughter and applause as democrats argued in their press conference today, you cant wait until an election to remove a president whos made clear hes willing to cheat in inlingrticles of impeachment, trump was welcoming the Russian Foreign minister Sergei Lavrov into the white house. And a white house spokesman actually said on fox news this morning that the two would discuss Election Security. President trump meets russias foreign secretary lavrov at the white house this afternoon now were told that this about arms control but its going to look real bad. Its going to be russia, russia, russia Sergei Lavrov. Its going to get bad p. R. Out of it, isnt it . I dont think so. Listen, these kind of conversations are critical you know, its incumbent upon any american president to try to build relationships across the globe. Were absolutely expected to talk about arms control, but also Election Security seth hes going to discuss Election Security with the russians thats like airing a say no to drugs psa with walter white [ light laughter ] at this point, all trump and his allies have left is one thing lying about the investigations and claiming theres some sort of treasonous deep state witch hunt to overthrow him. Yesterday, for example, a Justice DepartmentInspector Generals report found that, while there were serious errors in the fbis russia investigation, there was no antitrump plot and the investigation was both unbiased and justified. The report debunked trumps Conspiracy Theory that he was spied on or that it was an attempt by the Obama Administration to overthrow him. And yet today, trump lashed out at his own fbi director Christopher Wray for agreeing with that report breaking news, a longawaited report from the Justice Departments Inspector General finding the fbis launch of the russia probe was valid and unbiased the report also says that there was no spying on the trump campaign, which is a Conspiracy Theory that trump has pushed since taking office. Its important that the Inspector General found that in this particular instance, the investigation was opened with appropriate predication and authorization. Just minutes after that aired, President Trump tweeted this i dont know what report current director of the Christopher Wray was reading, but it sure wasnt the one given to me. Seth oh, it wasnt well, maybe the report you got didnt match the actual report, since the actual report was 434 pages wrong. [ light laughter ] trumps aides probably gave him a onepage memo that read, you were right again, boss. [ laughter and applause but theres another argument on top of all the lying and conspiracy theories thats infuriating. Trump and the gop have also argued that impeachment was somehow hurting the country and preventing the government from helping people even while the Trump White House itself is actively hurting the most vulnerable. As you head into christmas and you head into the holiday season, people are going to want results from congress. And right now all theyre getting is hatred, vitriol, and a sham impeachment hearing that doesnt do anything to food on the tables of american people. Seth oh, now youre worried about putting food on peoples tables last week you guys kicked 700,000 people off food stamps by imposing awful new work requirements think about how cruel that is. Work requirements from a guy who never works. Trump spends most of his time tweeting, watching tv, and crawling around his golf course like a groundhog who just popped out of the 18th hole [ laughter ] looks like hes auditioning for the role of the gopher in a remake of caddyshack. [ applause ] that thats the kind of cruelty republican have committed themselves to defending. And theyre fine with doing it today, democrats at least put down a marker and said there will be consequences for trumps behavior they asked a simple question should a president be allowed to cheat to win an election and instead of offering a coherent defense, all republicans could say was why dont you ask you know, frame your questions differently . Seth this has been a closer look. Well be r back thuse saoirse ronan, everybody [ cheers and applause announcer for more of seths closer looks, be sure to subscribe to late night on youtube. 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For people with hearing loss, visit sprintrelay. Com. Charmin ultra soft its softer than ever. Charmin ultra soft is softer than ever, so its harder to resist. Okay, this is getting a little weird enjoy the go with charmin. The roomba i7 with cleanng base automatic dirt disposal and allergenlock™ bags that trap 99 of allergens, so they dont escape back into the air. If its not from irobot, its not a roomba™ [ cheers and applause seth welcome back everybody. Give it up for the 8g band right over there [ cheers and applause back with us tonight, hes the drummer for heavy rock duo big business, the murder city devils, and also played with rock icons the melvins check out the latest release from big business, the beast you are. , evybody. Thank you for being here, coady. Thanks seth [ cheers and applause seth our first guest tonight is an Academy Awardnominated and golden globe awardwinning actress you know from films such as lady bird, atonement, and brooklyn. You can see her next in the highly anticipated film little women, which opens in theatres everywhere on december 25th. Lets take a look. Josephine yes, dear is there a reason you stopped reading belsham . Im sorry ill continue. You mind yourself dearie. Someday youll need me youll wish you had behaved better thank you, aunt march, for your employment and your many kindnesses, but i intend to make my own way in the world. Oh, well. No no