Tonight, join jimmy and his guests Lupita Nyongo dane cook, jay sinatraa won and matthew super delisi musical est, the Avett Brothers and featuring the legendary roots crew questlove 1135 steve and now, here he is, jimmy fallon [ cheers and applause [ cheers and applause jimmy thank you very much, thats a hot crowd welcome, everybody, welcome to the tonight show. Youre here. [ cheers and applause you made it. Thank you for being here what a show we have for you tonight. Lupita nyongo is here [ cheers and applause dane cook is here. [ cheers and applause jay won and Matthew Delisi are here [ cheers and applause and the Avett Brothers are here [ cheers and applause and im sorry, but after reading that, were already out of time. Good night, everyone [ light laughter ] lets get to some news here, everyone today a federal judge ordered President Trump to turn over eight years of his tax returns im not saying its bad, but right now trumps accountant is climbing over his border wall into mexico. Steve really [ light laughter ] jimmy well, people are still talking about the impeachment. I saw that trump said its a a bad thing to have on his resume [ light laughter ] the only thing worse than having impeachment on your resume, is having Rudy Giuliani as your only reference [ laughter ] i kind of like the idea of trump even having a resume though im pretty sure under skills, all it would say is, can type over 50 tweets per minute. [ laughter ] trumps never even really needed a resume. The only one hes ever made is a note to his dad which said, i your son, me want job. [ laughter ] its almost too real its almost too real meanwhile, nancy pelosi spoke in South Carolina this weekend and had had a message for trump regarding impeachment. She was pretty proud take a look at this. Donald, you used to own a a casino you know the house always wins [ cheers and applause jimmy trump was like, not true, my casinos were of massive failure. [ laughter ] but trump caused more [ light laughter ] but trump caused more controversy today when he announced a new middle east policy theres some pretty crazy tweets about it, too in one he said, if turkey does anything that i in my great and unmatched wisdom consider to be off limits i will destroy and obliterate the economy of turkey, ive done before. [ laughter ] and trump said, and if turkey really acts up, i wont pardon them on thanksgiving. [ light laughter ] oh, i saw that Vladimir Putin spent his birthday weekend hiking with a friend in the siberian mountains putin said it was relaxing, while his friend called it the scariest 48 hours of his life. [ light laughter ] go on, drink from canteen good for you. Im good man. [ light laughter ] going a hike with putin is basically the start of every episode of russian dateline. [ light laughter ] well, i have some good news. Starting today, the mcrib is back at mcdonalds. Thats right [ cheers and applause apparently customers were asking for an alternative meat option and mcdonalds was like, done, here you go. [ light laughter ] not quite sure what this is. This is very nice, mattel just released a new judge barbie. Check it out yeah its fun, but also a little weird when you walk in on your daughter being like, i sentence you to life without parole get in the hole, scumbag. [ light laughter ] hey get this, over the weekend a woman managed to board a a delta flight without a a boarding pass or i. D it wasnt that hard, actually. Another passenger just had to say, this is my emotional support woman. [ light laughter ] oh this made me laugh. A couple is going viral for having a number of things go wrong while trying to reveal the gender of their baby take a look at this. Yeah hit it, hit hit it hard oh not her oh no [ laughter ] steve oh, my god what jimmy great, now theyll never know [ light laughter ] the kids not even born and the parents are already embarrassing it. [ light laughter ] and finally, this is going viral. A squirrel ended up in a a womans house, so she used a a broom to try to push it out the window unfortunately, things did not go the way she planned go, squirrel. [ screaming [ laughter and applause jimmy the squirrel didnt leave the house but it did lose its hearing. [ light laughter ] im being told that until that squirrel is caught, the mcrib is no longer available [ laughter and applause guys, we have a great show, give it up for the roots, evybody. [ cheers and applause [ cheers and applause jimmy we have got a fun show tonight Lupita Nyongo is here [ cheers and applause thats the new book, right there. Dane cook is here, jay sinatraa won and matthew super delisi are here [ cheers and applause and we got great music i love them so much. The Avett Brothers are here tonight, ladies and gentlemen. [ cheers and applause closer than together is the name of the album. Every time they come on, they just sound so good i love the Avett Brothers. I saw speaking of good music, i saw madonna last night in brooklyn at bam did you see it yet questlove thursday jimmy you see it thursday . It is fantastic. She always changes the set up. It looks like a smaller venue for madonna, she does stadiums and stuff. It was like, maybe like, 2,000 people or Something Like that and it was intimate, the projection, crazy choreography she does this whole thing, you know, she does madam x with an eye patch. So shes doing that. Shes madam x, so shes all these different people shes a spy. And at one point shes typing on a typewriter and its like [ imitating typewriter ] and turns. And then people start marching out. And i was like it was so rad and awesome. If you get a chance to go see madonna, shes on tour its fantastic guys, whenever i get some down time here at the show, i like to go through instagram and scroll through all the photos. Steve really jimmy yeah [ light laughter ] and one thing ive noticed is that a lot of times, two people will write the exact same captions, but the pictures they post will be different ill show you what i mean in this next segment. Its time for picture this. Here we go picture thi picture this picture this yeah picture this [ cheers and applause jimmy lets take a look at this first example barack obama and President Trump both wrote the caption power couple. Lets see the pictures they posted obama posted a photo of him and michelle trump posted a picture of a combination pizza hut, taco bell [ laughter and applause it is powerful steve that is a powerful couple jimmy next one is a caption from target and walmart. They both wrote, dont forget to have this on when you visit our store. Target posted a picture of their rewards card walmart posted a picture of pants. [ laughter and applause steve theyre handy, yeah. Jimmy make sure you wear always forget. Steve unless theyre half off. [ light laughter ] jimmy heres one heres what Kim Kardashian and mike pence they both wrote, cant wait to move in soon. Kim posted a picture of her ranch in wyoming pence posted a picture of the oval office. [ laughter and applause moving on, heres one from kay jewelers and staples they both wrote, its worth spending a months salary on this. Kay jewelers posted a picture of an engagement ring. Staples posted a picture of a printer ink cartridge. Steve wow. [ laughter and applause jimmy 200 steve ill just buy a new printer. Jimmy this caption is from selena gomez and mall of america. They both wrote, its been abandoned for years now. Selena posted a picture of a a spooky Haunted House the mall of america posted a a picture of a spookier forever 21 steve wow. [ laughter and applause right. Thats scary jimmy heres one from Joaquin Phoenix and eric trump they both wrote, this is my best work in years and the highlight of my career. Joaquin posted a picture of the joker. Eric posted a picture of a a finger painting of a pumpkin [ laughter and applause steve wow. Jimmy hes Getting Better. Steve yeah, hes Getting Better at it jimmy heres the last one here taylor swift and fox news both wrote, you need to calm down. Taylor posted a picture of her music video. Fox news posted a picture of Rudy Giuliani. Steve oh [ laughter and applause jimmy thats all the time we have for picture this well be right back with Lupita Nyongo, everybody. Come on [ cheers and applause to look at me now, you dont see psoriasis. You see clear skin. Cosentyx can help people with moderate to Severe Plaque Psoriasis find clear skin that can last. Dont use if youre allergic to cosentyx. Before starting, get checked for tuberculosis. An increased risk of infections and lowered ability to fight them may occur. Tell your doctor about an infection or symptoms, if your inflammatory bowel disease symptoms develop or worsen, or if youve had a vaccine or plan to. Serious allergic reactions may occur. How sexy are these elbows . Ask your dermatologist about cosentyx. Fishrisotto. Buffalo. Buffalo Wild Wings gelato. Curry. Cacciatori. Chimichurri. Fried turkey. Blueberry. Mcflurry. mcdonalds cheese cake. Cheesecake Factory grilled steak. Clam bake. Milkshake. We are americas kitchen. Doordash. Every flavor welcome. This is you shopping. And this is you maximizing at t. J. Maxx. Get more of the brands you love and quality you want, and save every time. Its not opping, its maximizing. Maxx life at t. J. Maxx. Hashtag vacay. Sonoma . I want wine with lunch. Its 11am, cindy. Thanks, captain obvious. Dont hatelike their trip, book yours with hotels. Com and get rewarded basically everywhere. Hotels. Com. Be there. Do that. Get rewarded. When i think of what my imagination looks like. [laughs] i mean, wow. The surface is a tool that helps me realize beautiful ideas. [ cheers and applause jimmy our first guest is an oscarwinning actress, who you know from 12 years a slave, black panther and us. Shes also written a Childrens Book called sulwe that is available for preorder now ladies and gentlemen, please welcome Lupita Nyongo [ cheers and applause jimmy i love having you here welcome back you look great thank you thank you. Jimmy could we just run down everything thats happened to you since you were last on our show hmmmm. Jimmy you won an oscar for 12 years a slave. [ cheers and applause not bad jimmy yeah, not bad. You were in a couple of small films, star wars and black panther. You got a tony nomination. Mmhmm. Jimmy for your yeah and then probably most important, your name is now a beyonce lyric. I mean, yeah. Jimmy i mean, come on. [ laughter ] thats it jimmy how fun is that . Brown skin girl. She says, she needs an oscar for that pretty dark skin. Pretty like lupita when the cameras close in. Come on [ cheers and applause i love it now how do you hear about that does beyonce call you and give you a heads up no queen bey does not tell anyone anything [ light laughter ] no, i was in london and i was doing a press junket for a a documentary i did called warrior women. And the first journalist is just interviewing me, and she says, how do you feel now that youre a beyonce lyric . And i was like, what are you talking about . She was like, really . It dropped this morning. You dont know . And i was like, no, i dont know what are you talking about . Oh, my god. Am i the first person to tell you . And i was like, yes, you are. [ english accent ] jimmy youre an absolute lyric right. [ laughter ] yeah, its madness. She was so chuffed. Jimmy yeah but youre also, i found out, youre a jayz lyric as well i am, yes jimmy whats going on with this [ cheers and applause theyre obsess whats going on with the carters . I dont know. I love the carters and they seem to love me. Im not mad. Jimmy do you like anyone better which song do you like oh, no, i couldnt do that. Jimmy you couldnt choose. I couldnt choose between the two, no. Jimmy ive heard you rap before you rap. What do you rap under . A different name, right . Yes jimmy who are you . Troublemaker. Jimmy ah [ light laughter ] thats what im talking about, yeah, troublemaker i would you could you give us a little sample of a rap . I mean [ cheers and applause jimmy come on. Well, the thing okay, the thing about troublemaker, first of all, i was baptized troublemaker by common so i feel like its legit. Jimmy wow. And um and its something i do in a a car, i need a car. But, okay, if i had a mic, like a mic. And every respectable oh [ light laughter ] jimmy we always have we have so many microphones whichever one you want to use. Yeah, a respectable emcee has that but also, one of the things i have to have as troublemaker is shades so oh, my god [ cheers and applause jimmy just give us a taste just a taste oh, my goodness okay, only if the roots will join me. [ cheers ] oh, boy. Oh, boy. Thats a dope beat okay hold up. Troublemaker in the building hey [ cheers ] i feel some bars coming bars comin oh oh much love to the carter hova and beyonce they always big me u in a big way im a brown skin girl so that means a lo hov said we made i got an oscar for my pops much love to jimm and the root cause they hot wrote a book abou self lov sulwe bout to drop october 15t on time the cloc better go to commercia or these bars wont stop [ cheers and applause jimmy oh, yes hey, you can do it yes that was amazing troublemaker oh, i love it. [ cheers and applause come on. Song of the summer lets see more troublemaker. I love it, pal thank you for doing that im a one hit wonder. Jimmy no, i loved that thank you jimmy did you used to do that do you do that on set . Do you perform all the time . Im a fraud jimmy you are a fraud. I mean, i feel like in my past life im supposed to be a rapper. [ light laughter ] but im not. Jimmy youre not so i just i do it for fun. I like to play a rapper. But im really not one jimmy oh, yeah, yeah i thought that was fantastic you were telling me, because i was like, us is the scariest thing ive ever seen ever. Yeah. Jimmy you do that movie and i go, how do you keep it light on set oh. Okay, so winston duke was like the king of dad jokes. [ light laughter ] and so he would tell these awful, awful dad jokes and then shahadi, who played my daughter, she had quite a respectable cannon hers were always a little more funny. And evan was lame too. [ laughter ] and so but i had nothing to share. So what id do to unwind in the evening, after a day of shooting, is i would scour the internet for dad jokes and i would save them on my phone. And then, like, refer to them while we were on set and be like, oh, oh, i just came up with this one. [ light laughter ] jimmy did you have a a favorite dad joke . Whats a good one . Okay. Did you hear about the kidnapping in the park jimmy no he was very tired [ laughter ] jimmy oh, kid napping. Kid napping. Yes jimmy thats a good one. I have one okay. Jimmy okay, i think i have one. Whats harry potters favorite way to go down a hill . What . Jimmy walking. [ light laughter ] j. K. Rowling [ laughter and applause come on. Thats pretty good, right . Thats all right it gets there. [ laughter ] its a two step. You usually leave the room, you go, walking. And then you come back and go, j. K rowling [ laughter ] lets talk about this book, by the way. Yes jimmy i loved it, by the way. It is fantastic. Sulwe. Tell me what this is about its basically about you, right . Yeah, its a liberal autobiography, really. Its about this girl called sulwe. Sulwe means star in my mother tongue, luo. And shes born the darkest in her family and the darkest in her school and shes very uncomfortable with her skin and wants to go about changing it. But then, a magical night, through the night sky, changes her mind and she learns how to love herself [ audience aws ] jimmy its beautiful its a beautiful story [ applause ] did you do what this girl does too . She tries to eat lighter foods, to change her skin color yeah, yeah. My thing i gave a speech at the essence women in hollywood back in 2014 about my journey with dealing with colorism and prejudice and all that one of the things i spoke about was, i would pray to god every night for lighter skin, because my mom told me god performs miracles so, i thought, oh, well, heres one for me. Give me some light skin. I had a younger sister who was much lighter and so every morning i would wake up and run to the mirror and see whether he answered my prayer i would always be so disappointed thats one of the things that sulwe does in this book. Jimmy you think about that i have kids now, so i am extra sensitive to bullying, or any of that stuff now. For every kid, not just my kid, every kid. I think this is such a great book for everyone to read. If anyone is dealing with this stuff, just love yourself and youre good. Yeah and its also for people who dont know about colorism to get to know about it you know, its a mirror for dark skinned girls to see themselves specifically because i didnt have that growing up and i wanted to kind of use the pain that i felt for it to be my weapon, my gift you know but also for other people who might not know, i hope that this book is a window into understanding what people that may not be like you can go through. But ultimately, the message is, that the most important thing is to love yourself before anything else. Jimmy thats great i think youre gonna change a lot of lives with it [ cheers and applause Lupita Nyongo, everybody. [ cheers and applause sulwe is available for preorder now little monsters, by the way. Oh, yes jimmy i didnt talk about little monsters. Youre in another scary movie. Yes jimmy you have to stop making these scary movies. This ones not scary, this ones way more funny than scary. Its got zombies its got ukuleles. Its got children. Its got animals jimmy zombies and ukuleles, im sold yeah. And its got terrible language, so please, its not for children, despite the fact that it has children in it. Jimmy okay little monsters is out this week more with lupita after the break. Stick around, everybody. [ cheers and applause today, molly got dressed for a big night out with her closest friends. Sasha got dressed to crush her job interview. Alex got dressed to present a big idea hes been working on for months. And our stylists helped millions of other americans get dressed for millions of other personal moments big and small. At stitch fix we dont just see your size or style. We see you. Stitch fix. Personal styling for everybody. Seaonly abreva cany to help sget rid of it in. As little as 2 1 2 days when used at the first sign. Abreva starts to work immediately to bloc