Ferguson everybody wants to be their friend. That is where we win. Tonight were young foreeeever we feel Young ForeverTiffany Haddish is one of the funniest women bowen all you want to do is go home to the comfort of your family. Working today. Thats right. Everyone has a favorite, too, feel Young Forever whether its standup comedy vergara i would do it all over again. Or a movie like girls trip. But in this new sunday night series, whoo burrell its gonna be tough to say goodbye. Tiffanmit have finally met her match. I got six kids, oneill these have been the best 10 years of my life. So i know where this is going. Heres your first look at good job, kid. Kids say the darndest things. Tonight, were Young Forever hey. This is jaye. And this is tiffany. Mm, mmmm, mm were ready to start the show. Yep, she ready, oh, my gosh. This has been so much fun. cause kids say the darndest things. But its not over yet. Can you spell your name . This season, youre on dancing with the stars gianna. And im on emergence, can you spell it backwards . And thats all you people out there really need to know, um, gian but the folks at abc have asked us [ laughter ] to take a look at the full schedule. Its on, its on tonight so lets do it. Hannah, take a big breath, look at the prompter, hey its on tonight read it like you memorized it, and lets go. Its on, its on tonight heres a rapidfire look at the new season on abc. Go what exactly do you do mondays in your bowling ball cleaning business . Dancing with the stars. 10 10 10 i ask, uh, brown . Then its the good doctor. Would you like your balls polished or cleaned . Tuesdays, the conners, bless this mess. [ laughs ] [ laughter ] i had that same job at about 22. The new comedy mixedish, then blackish, and the new mystery emergence. I yhree cannot do this. Ghter ] oh, the kswiss . Emergence nicely done. Okay, ill give it a go. Boy, please. Wednesdays the goldbergs, schooled, modern family. [ laughs ] mar. Single parents, um, let me live my life first, and the Cobie Smulders show stumptown. And then, yeah, maybe ill think on that. Thursdays greys anatomy, a million Little Things, i have a girlfriend. I think its you. And how to get away with murder. You think its me . So, who wants in . Oh, no, no, no, no, no. Fridays american housewife, he has not paid any of my bills. Fresh off the boat. Ohh aah [ laughter ] faison . And two hours of 20 20. Im expecting a really important phone call from my agent. Saturdays saturday night football. Announcer touchdown i need you to pretend youre me. Roll tide sundays she ready. Americas funniest videos, she ready. She ready. Tiffany haddish hosts kids say the darndest things, haddish you may have to do some extra things, shark tank, and Nathan Fillion is back in the rookie. Like eat bugs. She ready and dont forget alright. Ill talk to you later. Jimmy kimmel live every weeknight. Shes totally not ready. This fall, hell be back in brooklyn [ laughter ] for a week of great episodes. [ laughs ] yay we did it. If you forget yes, we did. To blend it in, then this has been abcs fall preview special, then god will be mad if you forget to blend it in. And i only have one question god will be mad at you if you forget to blend it in . Why am i not on dancing with the stars . Yeah. [ cheers and applause ] i really dont know. Maybe you could put in a good word for me. Tiffany and the kids will be on sunday nights, sandwiched between americas funniest videos not sure about that. But thanks for watching abcs fall preview special. And shark tank. Next up, a new series with a badass woman that stars marvels very own Cobie Smulders. Bye, guys bye, guys this is the moment a series with a badass woman . Ima take this one. Do it. This is the time Cobie Smulders returns to network tv vote for me. Nothing to be stopping me, stopping me in a funny, actionpacked series emergence tuesday nights, 10 00, thats set in portland, oregon. Its called stumptown. Portland got the nickname stumptown starting september 24th. Love you. Way back in the 1800s, when the city was growing so fast, they would chop down trees for buildings, but they didnt have time to remove the stumps. Im like an encyclopedia of facts, hannah. I guess you are. Starting september 24th. No, it says it in the teleprompter. So that early retirement we planned. Were just gonna go with that. Its going ok . Okay. Great. Lets just say that cobie is not your typical p. I. Now im spending more time with the kids. Im introducing them to crab. She is truly hella strong. Crab . They love it. Okay. See that . No, i do see that. I got guns, son. I can see that. Ohhhh. U yeah. The ds and i wanto buil. Girl, you better stop lets frickin do this. Hhyoure finally building that outdoor kitchen. My name is Cobie Smulders, and i play dex parios. Yup with room for the whole gang. She is a female p. I. See how investing with a j. P. Morgan advisor can help you. That really wants to do good. But she doesnt do it good. Visit your local chase branch. [ laughs ] you from around here . Born and raised. You . Oh, afghanistan. Bull. Your but as you get older,hing. It naturally begins to change, hmm . Your dog tags dont match the name on your credit card. Causing a lack of sharpness, or even trouble with recall. Until you get your lies straight, im pretty sure only one of us thankfully, the breakthrough in prevagen helps your brain is getting lucky tonight. This is goodbye and actually improves memory. Cheers. Yeah. The secret is an ingredient originally discovered. Smulders the show is based off of a graphic novel. Its gritty, its dark, but its also really funny. In jellyfish. In clinical trials, prevagen has been shown im gonna have to check for a wire. To improve shortterm memory. Okay. Well, its a good thing i wore my secondbest bra. Dex is exmilitary. She is a gambler. Prevagen. Healthier brain. Better life. Shes also very caring and very loyal. Alright, so this is how you are gonna say wn. She has a brother that she has to take care of. Youll get the best deal of the year on xfinity tv and internet and you even get this. Are we gonna be okay . Yeah. Mike, youre on balloons. But she can barely take care of herself. You . A p. I. . You cant find your keys half the time. Sarah, youre gonna high five everybody ge. Dont miss the xfinity best deal of the year. Keep me out of trouble. You think its gonna keep you out of trouble . Now thats simple, easy, awesome. It might just do the trick. Everything goes here get amazing tv and internet during our best deal of the year with huge savings of 600 over two years. Shes so tangible and so real. We can all relate to, plus a speed upgrade to 400 megs, free for 2 years. If not all of her characteristics, most of them. And ask about even more savings with xfinity mobile. I need to arrest you. Click, call, or visit a store today. [ scoffs ] for what . For getting beat up . For 14 unpaid parking tickets. Ugh. Another one. [ siren wails ] dex has this car. Youre supposed to go. A typical home would be too and it has a mixtape yes, a mixtape small. The scale has to be the same. That is jammed in the player. Youll go over a bump, and a song will come on. Oh my goodness. [ click ] a special and unique place. They really did bring new [ groans ] life and then some. [ tires screech ] you okay . Yeah. It feels like home. [ muffled screaming ] theres two more in the trunk. I would expect to see a lot of fun action. This is what happens when [ tires screech ]. A lot of relationships you ideally care about, you meetr rlfr a world that seems interesting. Its exciting as a woman ream ] to be playing a character that hasnt really been seen before. Yeah ather coming up, the cast of a million Little Things ty roasth. Has some secrets to share. And lets start getting ready for the final season of modern family. Gonna miss that show. I grew up with it. No, i didnt. Is that what a break young i did. You did . People sounds like . Ooh. Makes me feel old. Come back up, but it sounds like the impact is so strong it actually punctured his lungs. He was coughing up blood for a little bit. He says hes fine now. But it was not the greatest idea. He jumping off 50foot cliffs. Were glad hes okay. This is bungee jumping in austria. Hes set to go and go to the jump. You get to the countdown ooh. You gotstay. But that wrap around yeah. They do say that while hes not supposed to go down feet first, he did correct himself at the bottom. He was eventually able to walk i did. You did . Away. But youre too busy gazingr at double the beef, he thought about it. And double the layers you love. Bringing out the robotic gator to pull a prank. Maybe next decade. The 5 triple double crunchwrap box. The tubing. Only at taco bell see the funny freakout but one blows them all out of the water. Hydro boost with hyaluronic acid to plump skin cells so it bounces back. Neutrogena® and for body. Hydro boost body gel cream. So it bounces back. Alright, so this is how you are gonna say wn. Youll get the best deal of the year new magnum ice cream. On xfinity tv and internet and you even get this. Double sea salt caramel. Carefully made to be broken. Mike, youre on balloons. Magnum ice cream. Sarah, youre gonna high five everybody. Ben, youre gonna be wowing them with your dance moves. Dont miss the xfinity best deal of the year. Now thats simple, easy, awesome. Get amazing tv and internet during our best deal of the year with huge savings of 600 over two years. Plus a speed upgrade to 400 megs, free for 2 years. And ask about even more savings with xfinity mobile. Click, call, or visit a store today. As we all know, a million Little Things was one of the biggest new hits of last season. Its one of those shows that you really have no idea whats coming next. So, what do you thinks coming next . I dont know, but i cant wait to find out. And action. Eddie i want to come home, but i promised you no more lies. We finished season 1 with eddie clearly about to drop some nuggets of info on katherine. So, theres something i need to tell you. You see the crumbling of everything that shes really worked for. We come back in finishing the sentence, and i know. [ exhales sharply ]. It is riveting. Yes whoo whoo roday we met gary as a bona fide, cardcarrying cynic. He contracted a rare form of cancer that men seldom get, and he covered a lot of that pain with snarky humor. Doc, the suspense is killing me. Is there anything else killing me . And then he met a woman who gave him a reason to fight. Youre in. Im in. And now that maggie is in remission, these two are gonna have to figure out want to eat it as a dip, this is who they are as a couple. Now theyre going to be experiencing it. What life is like with normal lives. Im so dirty, maggie no. There are about to be some but, of course, it wont be normal, people really good. Because its a million Little Things. Unbelievably good. Make sure you watch to the when we met rome, rome was at a breaking point. End of the video. If you hadnt called to tell me about jon, thats amazing. I would be dead right now. Yeah. His friends make up his family. We got you, man. Hes got the motorized alligator moving into season 2, rome wants a child badly. Got the murky water. This could be us. But i dont want this. Unfortunately, the agreement that he had made with his wife is that they would never have kids. Congratulations. Its moving fast. And rome is headed for a serious roller coaster ride. [ screams ] its a rare thing oh to put together a group of human beings everyone sees alligator and who know how to treat each other, goes into survival mode. Know how to treat a crew. Audiences can feel that love within this cast. She rolls up on this people, and they just freak out. It makes all the difference in the world. [ screams ] romany malco knows every person on earth. [ laughs ] hes always the one, [ laughter ] like, doing selfies of us all the time. This little boy is with his [ laughs ] grace park is probably one of my favorite people mom. He spots it. Ive met in a while. James roday is the funniest man i have ever met. Mom [ scream David Giuntoli its a deadlock tie between his eyes and his buns. [ laughter ] he he goes again. Giuntoli Allison Miller [ scream ] moms. Shes so, like, happy constantly. David giuntoli his jawline. Christina moses vulnerable, human, brilliant. All right. Get out of here stephanie szostak. Joie de vivre. [ bleep ] oh, no. Im following roday. This is what we all do. We follow roday. [ laughter ] ohoh, oh, oh moving into season 2. Its gonna be a lot. [ groans ] you got your whole life ahead of you. Where would you like to go . You thought it was real . Everything happens for a reason, guys. Dude over here still thinks its real. Hold on to your hats. Its fake. Hold them on tight. Its not a he thinks its not whoaoh, ohoh a joke. He flipped over. A million Little Things will be back on thursdays, right after the longestrunning medical drama in tv history, whoa. Greys anatomy. I think my old show scrubs was the longestrunning medical comedy on tv. Ah wow. Is that true . I just made it up, but it says it in the teleprompter, [ laughter ] yeah. That was pretty good. And whos gonna check those facts . Okay. Back to facts. Ive been a fan of abc and thursdays time after time he gets these for a long time. All those tough women . I love it. Folks. A big day on the water. And i cant wait to see what happens on the final season of how to get away with murder. You wait, there will be an viola davis is so good. Australian out. Shes hella good. Thats right. Heres a sneak peek. [ suspenseful music plays ] [ laughter ] hope you had fun with us today. We appreciate you joining us. Oh, my god. Check out rightthisminute. Com the fbi. They know everything. For more entertaining videos, and well see you next time on what is going on . Consider it a gift that im not telling you. An all new rtm. [ engine revs, thud ] oh, my god laurel laureeel that looks Like Television you got to watch. Feels like a great year on abc. Lots of new shows. [ whispering ] emergence. [ normal voice ] and some goodbyes to a few favorites. There is so much to watch. Mm. I might not leave the house. Coming up on abcs fall preview special,. 6, 7, 8 a look back at the comedy that changed television modern family. A look back at the comedy that changed television baby crying big dreams start with small steps. blender whirring . But dedication can get you there. So just start small. Start saving. Easily set, track and control your goals right from the chase mobile® app. baby laughing pampers is here to help every parent chase. Make more of whats yours®. Love the changes a baby brings. Would shakespeare have chosen just some pens . S. Methinks tul pens would serve mlady well. Thanks. And a unicorn notebook get everything on your list. This weeks doorbuster 300sheet paper ream for 1; 1 in store or online from the advisors at office depot officemax. Youre smart,eat you already knew that. But its also great for finding the perfect used car. Youll see what a fair price is and you can connect with a truecar certified dealer. Now youre even smarter. This is truecar. You cant fake the goodness the crunch of real almonds. Wheel how chocolatey chunks taste in cold milk. Of. Fortune we keep it real. Ladies and gentlemen, because you cant fake. Delicious. Here are the stars of americas game special k. Pat sajak and vanna white were coming at you. Thank you, jim. Thank you, folks. Welcome, welcome. Appreciate that. You have to go now. Get everything you need to go back big yes, i do. Hi so youre here, huh . At the low prices you love. Well, lets get to it. Were gonna do our first toss up. Hey allergy muddlers. Achoo . Do your sneezes turn heads . It is a title. Our players are ready to go. Try zyrtec. It starts working hard at hour one. Vannas ready, and here it comes. And works twice as hard when you take it again the next day. Zyrtec muddle no more. [ bell chimes ] and, joel . School of rock. Yes, yes, yes. Whats better than one how about twoe garden . All new 5 take home entrees [ applause ] enjoy any meal here then take home an alltime favorite like fettuccine alfredo for just 5 more hurry in for 5 take home entrees only at olive garden listen to this 11 seasons, 232 episodes, it won the emmy for best Comedy Series its first five seasons on the air, it literally helped change how we define family. Hannah, ladies and gentlemen, modern family. [ singing in swahili ] mitchell we adopted a baby. Exciting uh, just turn it off. I cant turn it off. Its who i am. The music. Oh, yes, the music. [ upbeat music plays ] hah welcome to your nightmare [ vocalizing ] we locked our baby in the car, and people are judging us [ highpitched ] im gonna break it woman sir, please tell your wife to relax. Thats a man. Really . Here comes treble. Im julianna. Clive bixby. Yah what the hell was that . luke, i am your father. [ laughs ] that takes me back to the delivery room. [ laughs ] thats what i said to you when you were coming out of your moms lady parts. Oh, my god