indictment so lame and overtly political that it's guarantied to galvanize every trump voter like funnel cake at a stock car race. there's less meet on this indictment than a you are i can carcass in joy behar's trash can. stelter has a better chance of winning a wet t-shirt contest. don't bother reading it i can summit up for you. donald trump disagreed with the election outcome. oh, you thought there would be more? sorry, these are democrats, they don't have to work hard when the media gives them cover and yes there is a second part, to forget about the hunter and joe show. make news to conceal the real news. yes, the doj and jack smith apparently believe that trump's thought crimes are more insidious than the international racketeering gang known as the biden clan. instead they chase thought crimes and if thought crimes were fromable we would all be screwed. kat would be on death row complaining about wearing orange. but, see, we don't do thought crimes in this country. this isn't canada. there's a reason the first amendment is first. it's the thing that makes our constitution and our nation exceptional. that and ice machines. see, the first amendment means you can think and even say things that others find objectionable. like if someone says i love brian kilmeade. it's wrong, it's gross, disgusting even, but you can't arrest someone for it. this also holds true for donald trump and if it doesn't, then you're next. trump endorsed a protest at the white house on january 6th. things went bad that day, a collection of yahoos rushed the capitol and stole nancy's laptop. by the way, has anybody, you know, got a copy of that hard drive because imagine the stock tips on that one. but just because he endorsed the original protest doesn't mean he's libel for the actions of a horned sha man, even judge jeanine wouldn't convict san she thinks side burns are illegal. if endorsing that protest means trump's guilty most democrats should be in jail too does anyone recall the summer of 2020 love, 25 deaths damages, federal courthouse on fire, a police station destroyed, and kamala's reaction promoting a bail fund and asking for donations. setting fire to a federal courthouse attacking the white house isn't that like obstructing official proceedings. that's one of the charges, by the way, obstructing oh officialing proceedings, or oops for sure. that's right donald trump has been charged with two counts of oops, almost as serious as one charge of whoops. but legally that's known and stacking charges, you know, like nadler does with depends. but in layman's terms, it's [bleep]. they throw the kitchen sink at him but biden just banned kitchen sinks. take this charge, conspiracy against rights. jack smith who is every wild eyed professor with library breath and blm bumper sticker had to reach back to civil war times for this charge for the keep the clan from suppressing the black vote in 1920. this is a bigger stretch than when tyrus does yoga. what's smith going to charge trump with next, felony witch craft tcasting of spells? let's throw trump in the potomac to see if he sinks or floats t random judge randomly selected to oversee the case sent all 11 defendants from january 6th to prisonen a for several of those defendants, prosecutors didn't even seek prison time, but she still put them behind bars. and, instead of spitting, the media just swallows. >> one of, if not the most significant case in united states his torques it is up there about dred scott, it is up there with brown versus board of education. >> this is the gravest political crime since sus session. >> from time to time america faces threats from monsters who want to destroy our democracy. that happened in 1861. pearl har works 1941. 9/11, 2001. donald trump threatening to do it all again but even more effectively saying he's going to institute a presidential dictatorship that we may assume is going to take our democracy away. >> greg: quick someone call msnbc they need more people on screen. the world's ugliest year book. so why the hyperbole? because so called media can't be seen attacking free speech so they call free speech something else. bottom line, stacey abrams, hillary, nancy, joe, all denied electoral outcomes, oh bomb appear challenged ballot signatures in illinois. and there is no evidence trump did more than that, denied the outcome. so since our justice system is currently operating like a tijuana traffic court, it's really about the next election. winning a case against a republican in new york and dc is so much easier than ballot harvesting but it tells you what happens when you dare to fight, it upsets those in power, this indictment sends a message that there will be no trump, or another one like him, ever. and by waiting until the archer stuff came out that pulled the curtain back and showed us how this machine operates. they went too far because they thought they could. now, if you're inside this story, you don't get the story. but if you step outside of it, you see it's just a political machine trying to crush its challengers. now i'm not here to tell you how to vote but as i said at the top, whether they realize it or not, i think joe and merrick the doj, and jack, just did. >> period! >> greg: let's welcome tonight's guests! his way with words entertains the rable and has him undefeated at scrabble. novelist and literary critic walter kirn [cheers and applause] ''s killed more people than covid former cia operative mike baker >> she's like an aboveground pool, refreshing but often found in bad neighbors. fox news contributor kat timpf mom mom my dad has an aboveground pool. >> greg: and finally mars sent rovers to explore him. my massive side kick and the nwa world champion tyrus! [cheers and applause]. >> greg: walter, i have a question for you but i just want you to speak your mind about this. what are you thinking right now about all of this? the timing is interesting. the charges are based on mind reading. what are your thoughts? >> mike: you know, historians like to call america the american experiment. and by that they mean we try things. but i'm afraid the american experiment iss about to blow up the laboratory. this is a little too much. we're now going to have 12 people, rather than 80, 75 million, decide our elections. and it concerns me. but what concerns me more is that we now know what american presidents can't do. they can't say, i was robbed. you know, they can do that in pro wrestling, they can do that in every other sport but they can't say i was robbed. what they can do is they can put, you know, hundreds of thousands of japanese citizens in concentration camps in world war ii. they can start wars looking for weapons of mass destruction that aren't found. they did, you know, do all sorts of things, but they can't say i was robbed. that's going to be illegal. >> greg: right. >> mike: so at least we'll have crossed one crime off the list. it concerns me that about half of america right now is looking for a way out of america, and it's not a good thing. >> greg: it is true, like the guy didn't start one war, but you know what? he thought he got ripped off so he's in trouble. i thought, and you look as rugged as ever. >> thank you. i'm concerned we seem to be saying starting a war is a bad thing. is that what you're saying walter? >> greg: it's bad for your business. >> walter: it's bad for my son. >> greg: great point made by ann culture the media's obsessed with january 6th because it's the first mob we've ever sthooen wasn't left wing. >> yeah. i guess the part that fascinates me the most, right, because i've always -- the problem i've always had with donald trump is, is that it's a self-inflicted wound that he usually engages in, right? so his behavior on january 6th, the things that he did, he could have done it better. i agree, the indictment is full of nothing, right, there's nothing there. but, you know, the former president has a tendency to create situations that are unnecessary. if he would just step -- if he could reign himself in. >> greg: but that's why he got elected. >> tyrus: exactly. >> greg: he elected because he fights and you can't turn the faucet off. >> mike: that's the problem we have. the policies were great, again i'm a small government guy, worry about national security, worry about the boarders, financial responsibility if we could find folks interested in that. but i guess the part again that i find most fascinating about the whole story is the randomly selected judge who previously, prior to being a judge, worked for the most democrat-linked law firm in this country, right? and -- >> greg: linkeded to burisma. >> mike: linked to burisma and also a place where hunter biden was of counsel for five years and the media's trying to blow that one over. right? there's no connection there, just like everything else involving president biden's son. and so there's so many problems here. but deep down i keep -- i'm disappointed because i keep thinking we could have avoided a lot of this chaos if president trump could have reigned himself and been more disciplined but i don't disagree with your point that's why people voted for him. >> greg: i disagree no matter what you do they're going to come after you. wasn't january 6th, they impeached him before that for a phone call. kat what's your take, i know you're a legal scholar >> kat: well, yeah, everybody thinks they're a legal scholar now so i might as well hop on. >> greg: well you watched a lot of la law growing up >> kat: i don't know what that is. [laughter] >> kat: i kept reading it and i was pretty confused because i guess they have to prove that he knew he lost the election and was saying all this stuff anyway. i don't think that he thinks he lost, first of all. >> greg: yeah >> kat: i know that he would never say that he lost because he doesn't even say that about golf. >> greg: yeah, exactly. >> kat: so how are they intending to prove this? i really don't understand and i have the same concerns everybody does as a first amendment absolutist, regardless how you feel about any of this, that should be concerning to see this case that basically hinges on what i believe's pretty clearly free speech. >> greg: uh-huh. last word tyrus. what are your thoughts? >> tyrus: i always try to take things and look at it from my perspective if i went to work every day and somebody did something to me to try to make me lose my job the entire four years i worked there, every day gutfeld put something in my desk, some drug paraphernalia, a kidnap victim, just like nonstop got together with half the office i don't have lunch with and they all voted to have me fired, i would be not trusting any of them come christmas time with gifts. and i think everyone in here would be like, yes, i would not believe one thing that came out of that other side after they did to you for four years. literally everything they could possibly do with no criminal connection, he was putin's pitch, then he was putin's life partner then he was a dance partner in north korea. >> mike: can you be a bitch and a light partner at the same time? >> tyrus: it's a graduation. started out he was a side chick then they got to know each other they had so much in common and then one day came home told his wife it's trump's time he gets me. >> greg: and they stopped having sex. >> tyrus: that's what happens when you communicate. you guys know. and then one day something happens and you don't believe it because you had four years of everything you did was destroyed, ruined, his entire presidency was one big cue and then you have the tamerity to think the election was rigged? take yourself out of the presidency, they're going to get a conviction, that's what they're going to do. what do they have 73 counts on him now? they just need one and that's all they're after but the couper, the work is not done. >> and this is now sitting in dc. >> tyrus: yeah. i'm saying regardless whether he's convicted or not he's going to get elected president because the american people see it. i said it last night i'll say it again. he changed things. >> greg: on that note we shall move on. i always leave when people are clapping, including in the bedroom. [laughter]. >> tyrus: we were doing so well. >> greg: i know we were. a donor pano ai chooses t-mobile for business for 5g solutions... ...because t-mobile helps pano ai innovate, so they can stop the spread of wildfires. now's the time to see what america's largest 5g network can do for your business. with a majority of my patience with sensitivity, i see irritated gums and weak enamel. sensodyne sensitivity gum & enamel relieves sensitivity, helps restore gum health, and rehardens enamel. i'm a big advocate of recommending things that i know work. remember the things you loved... ...before asthma got in the way? fasenra is an add-on treatment for asthma driven by eosinophils. it's designed to target and remove them and helps prevent asthma attacks. fasenra is not for sudden breathing problems or other eosinophilic conditions. allergic reactions may occur. don't stop your asthma treatments without talking with your doctor. tell your doctor if your asthma worsens. headache and sore throat may occur. tell your doctor if you have a parasitic infection. get back to better breathing. ask your doctor about fasenra. (tony hawk) skating for over 45 years has taken a toll on my body. i take qunol turmeric because it helps with healthy joints and inflammation support. why qunol? it has superior absorption compared to regular turmeric. qunol. the brand i trust. >> woman: why did we choose safelite? we were loading our suv when... crack! safelite came right to us, and we could see exactly when they'd arrive with a replacement we could trust. that's service the way we want it. >> singers: ♪ safelite repair, safelite replace. ♪ ♪ [cheers and applause] >> greg: thank you. thank you. buy art from a slob, you'll get a nice job. have your kids donate to a dem and watch the offers roll in. we're learning more about elizabeth hearst. nah tally a democratic donor and biden commission appointee who actually bought hunter's [bleep] art. and we do mean [bleep]. i've seen better stuff sprayed on canvas from a lactose intolerant chimp. turns out not only did she donate her children did, too. these crazy kids when i was a kid i spent my paper rout money on candy cigarettes not greasing the wheels of political appointments. according to the washington free beacon when she was maxed out for hillary's primary campaign in 2017 her 17-year-old daughter made her own 2700 contribution, $1,700 from a 17-year-old. even at a dollar apiece, that's a lot of dixie cups of lemonade to sell. but oddly a year later, the daughter got a spot on hillary's finance committee. then she served as a tech consultal for the dnc while in college. it was the greatest thing hillary did for a younger woman since she called off the hit on monica. crazy, right? she worked for hillary clinton and she's still alive. but it's a perfect example of what it takes to get ahead in dc. but better a spot on hillary's committee than a spot on an intern's dress. >> whoa. >> greg: whoa. ha ha. all right, nathali's teen also also contributed a few grand to a congressman and kamala harris. so you see how this works. shell out big bucks to dems find loopholes to get around donation limits by putting the cash under your kids' names and they get rewarded. there's more mutual back scratching than kudlow's last hot tub party. the biden scheme, i'll sniff your back if you'll sniff mine. joe once said there would be a wall between his official duties and his family's family business and looks like that barrier's just like the one at the southern border, it doesn't stop crime. but maybe there's no connection between getting a commission and hunter's blow art. but that's like saying there's no connection between my appearance and women fainting. it's what some call quid pro quo which is latin forgive me cocaine. kat, this should disgust you. it's all a big game almost like the a block replayed. certain people are allowed to play a certain game if they pay and if you're not part of that elite group, you get nothing >> kat: i didn't even know about this. >> greg: yeah >> kat: there's all this rich people stuff i'm finding out. i'm like i wish i would have had this generational wealth. then i may have been a tool so maybe i'm not sure. you have your career and you have kids and if you want kids you might sacrifice some of your career but if you're super rich you have kids that can then make you money. >> greg: exactly >> kat: that's crazy to me. she had these kids who had these trust funds who certainly did not decide on their own to spend their money by donating it to democrats, right? but you can actually buy influence using your children. why don't rich people have even more kids? >> greg: i know. and that leads me to ask you, tyrus, have you been considering? you could create a mountain of wealth. >> tyrus: well that was the plan, that's why i diversified. i had the asian one because i needed him good at math. i had the mexican one because she'll get a job no matter what i need. i had the regular white one for political appearances. and then i had the black black one for, you know, sports and what not. so i've got it all >> kat: you do have the united nations of kids. >> the show's already gotten the color bars we can stop at this point. >> tyrus: i did what i have to do, someone has to push me in the wheelchair when i'm 60, i know it's not the one i go home to right now, she'll push me if the corner and i need sunlight and get smacked. i need my children to take care of me. this is what, and we go back to president trump, this is what his presidency brought to light, the transparency of the swamp. when he said drain the swamp, that is the swamp. you put money into their pockets and they -- if you do it enough, you do it often, you'll be rewarded because then your influence and then you ask for favors. this art scheme is the same blueprint that he used in china, romania, everywhere, ukraine. it's the same thing except there's bigger numbers overseas. so the fact that we can put -- there's no expert in the doj that can put together what i just got put into trying to get the fact i went out and picked children for labor based off race, it was love, too. but is the swamp and they want so desperately to go back the way, because they've been hungry a few years now and now they're not even hiding it anymore because they're thinking we'll just keep blaming trump and go back to what it is. that's a small thing. but every republican, democrat, congressman, they're all wanting to get back to that body of business and that's why we need term limits to get them out. >> greg: there you go. what do you think mikey? [cheers and applause]. >> mike: to tyrus's point about how come nobody as the doj figured this out. you may know this greg but i run a global and intelligence and investigations security firm, foreman square group thank you very much. >> greg: they obviously never heard of it because anybody who does is dead. when you hear where mike baker works, that means you're about to die. that's their motto. >> mike: but it's quick and it's peaceful. >> greg: usually back of the head. >> mike: and so the point being is that, look, i've got investigators that, you know, within a couple of months would have put this together. and i think, assuming that those folks on capitol hill that are responsible for this investigation don't get bored, they'll do it as well because it's money. and the great thing about an asset tracing exercise or money laundering is that the trail is there. it's a heavy lift, it's labor intensive, you have to work for it. but you can do it. and this is -- i don't know how else to explain it. it's money laundering. it's pay for play. and the media's spin on this now, now they're talking about like, well, okay, maybe the president got on a couple calls but that's just like you walk in the room and say hello and then you leave. he doesn't know. so they're slowly starting to lose their ability to defend this or to hide it. and if they keep the investigation going, there will be enough paper trail to prove what's been going on. but this stinks out loud. >> greg: except that the media's just not that interested in this. >> mike: they're not interested. >> greg: because it's their side breaking the law which means it doesn't scombrooift here's my take on this story, i looked at hunter's art this afternoon. the dude paints flowers. would you think given the outrages life he leads that his art would be better, but he's basically kind of a psychodelic greeting card artist. and so you never see anybody displaying his art proudly. you hear about them buying it but you never see it in anybody's house. i think that the notion that he's being paid off is inevitable given how bad it is, but, as i say, he paints flowers. that's what's going on in his head. you know? >> greg: hunter biden paints flowers and bill clinton painted jennifer flowers. what a call back, huh? >> mike: wow. >> greg: thank you >> kat: so i really enjoyed your point. i did. >> greg: i soiled it with a terrible joke. i don't care though, that's why i'm here, to destroy people's lives. take that out of context. all right, up next, a duchess behind the resolute desk and why americans think the news is a yeah, everything's taken care of. -hey, jamie. -oh, what am i up to? just visiting a special secret client. i can't say who it is, but let's just say she bundled her dream house and her dream car for round-the-clock protection with progressive. oh. she has another house in malibu. she's been an astronaut, an architect, a ceo. we're in front of her house, dude. i'd love to tell you who her boyfriend is, but i don't think i "ken." i'd love to tell you, but i don't think i -- "barbie" in theaters now. hi i'm chaka khan [singing] and when i'm performing i give it everything i've got and i take the same approach when it comes to my health. that starts with knowledge. as a black american, i know i'm at a higher risk for diabetes, more than five million of us are living with this disease and it's complications. but we're less likely to get the latest technology to manage this dangerous disease. it's called cgm continuous glucose monitoring. instead of a painful finger stick to check your blood sugar, you wear a small device that can give you glucose readings at anytime. now, let me tell you something good. cgm can make a big difference in bringing down your a1c. if you have diabetes, ask your health care professional if cgm is right for you. ♪ >> mock it and move on. >> greg: mock it or move on, first story. according to the daily mail, joe biden's sistory. sistory? sister mallory said meghan markle would make a good presidential candidate one day. well i can tell that went over well. tyrus are they just doing this to make kamala feel bad? >> tyrus: no, they're making us all feel bad. we're all stupider for hearing that. what was it that she's doing that -- is it the way she brings people together? is it her awesome charity work with a the orphans and children around the world that she brings -- no. she whines for meants her poor husband drags him all over the country with jussie shoal lay like body guards. first time we had a high speed chase in new york city. i don't know if any of you have been outside but the chances are slim and none and none left town. so yeah she would be a great presidential candidate. for what? >> greg: i don't know. walter, what do you think? >> walter: well, the question in america rise now is who isn't qualified to be president. [laughter] >> walter: i mean, besides the guy who is. you know, i think that meghan markle is at least as qualified as kamala harris. >> greg: oh, of course. >> walter: and there's only one way to find out and that's the way we always find out who's qualified to be president, we elect them and then we find out they aren't. and so we should try with her. she might surprise on the upside. you know, i wasn't expecting much from the young george bush. you know. i wasn't expecting much from donald trump. but the world didn't fall apart. so -- >> greg:. >> greg: it's an easy job when you think about it. not a lot to do, you go to some funerals usually caused by you. >> it's like being the pope right? it's a title. >> it's harder to be one of those girls on deal or no deal, which she was. >> with the briefcases. >> you have to point first of all. >> walter: vanna white for president. >> greg: there you go. >> mike: with meghan, i can say this because i'm a dual citizen, british citizen. prince harry's a [bleep]. right? and, you know, i think the idea that meghan markle could one day be president, aspirationally i get. we all want our kids to grow up in the country where, you know, maybe i, too, could be president. but we didn't really mean it. right? i mean, look. >> greg: if my parents were alive and thought i was running for president they'd kill me. >> mike: well, they would have called me and i would have done it for free. but i forget what we were talking about but meghan markle. >> greg: you have that affect when we hear you talk. kat, does this thrill you. wouldn't it be fun to have meghan markle run for president? i think it would be great for show and that's how i think about everything >> kat: no. >> greg: no? >> kat: i'm already tired of talking about her. >> greg: really? >> kat: yes and she's not tired of it. she loves it. i don't think this is real, i think she told her to say that or she would write about her in her next book. >> greg: interesting point >> kat: yeah. >> greg: that's it? >> kat: i think so. again, she supposedly left, right, because she hated the attention, and now it's like, we weren't talking about her for like five minutes and now all of a sudden she would make a great president? >> greg: good point. >> if you like the story about meghan though talking about this because they reference the fact that, well, when she left being a royal. whether the hell was she a royal? >> greg: royal pain in the ass. all right, a new study shows -- what? >> kat: no, it's like she's a professional victim and her whole victim origin story is i was a princess and it was like, not that fun. >> greg: yeah. talk about the school of hard knocks >> kat: yeah. >> greg: all right. i like how you didn't have much to say and then all of a sudden you had a lot to say. typical chick, right? a sexist would say. >> tyrus: sexist named greg. >> greg: yes. all right, finally, i think it's finally. >> mike: is it chick or broad? do we say broads anymore >> kat: i just love this. >> greg: this audience >> kat: yeah, you guys like i'm literally going to be fine, so -- >> greg: i'm never going to get to this story. that's a great segment, how i never get to the next story. new study shows roughly 40% of americans sometimes avoid or often avoid the news because it causes depression, anger, anxiety and helplessness. isn't that true? i would think it would be more, mike. >> mike: yeah. i'm staring at the huge graphic behind you right now. it depends on what you call news, right? most people nowadays i suspect get a lot of their news from twitter, other social media sites. it's not like the old days they had three networks and they would play the news at set times of day, 5:00 news, 11:00 news. and everybody had to tune in to those three networks essentially to get -- so they were having a shared experience in a manner of speaking and we don't get that now. i'm sorry, am i boring you? >> greg: yes walter? >> walter: see the news is supposed to depress you that's why they advertise antidepressants. it's a perfect circumstanceical and now it's breaking up. because the antidepressants aren't working greg: that is such a great point. we make you feel bad and then try this drug that will make you feel better. perfect. >> tyrus: no, not perfect, because looking for news is like going on a treasure hunt through stupidity. like you just want the news, and then the so-called anchor then gives you their opinion. i didn't ask for that. just tell me the weather, the sidewalk winding and where the killers are at so i can plan my vacation, sir. like they just -- you go to watch the news and then they'll have a panel of experts who aren't experts telling you their opinions and what they think. and you can go stand out -- you can turn around and ask your wife her opinion, you know, for the same thing. it's just ridiculous. it's not news. the problem is people aren't depressed because of news, it's hard to get real information because you have to go through people who pretend to be news people but they're opinion posts. like we have newsmen and news women and it's hard to find them especially when you actually need to know. try finding a weather report. like you have to go to a specific station that says weather and even then you have to wait for the world tour to end to be like is it raining or not today? do i need glogs and an umbrella. >> like getting sports news and going to espn and not getting sports news >> kat: i hate it when that happens snoop last word kat >> kat: of course the news is dprefshgs what isn't? anything is depressing once you learn about it. >> greg: everything starts out nice but then the more you read the worst it goes. especially me, the more you get to know me the better, right? >> kat: sure, i'll go with that publicly. >> greg: thank you. up next a missing bull and kayaking is my thing. running is awesome. but her moderate to severe eczema would make her skin so uncomfortable. i was always so itchy especially when i was hot. now my skin doesn't itch as much. now we're staying ahead of her eczema. there's a power inside all of us to live our passion. and dupixent works on the inside to help heal your skin from within. it helps block a key source of inflammation inside the body that can cause eczema. so, they can have clearer skin and less itch. serious allergic reactions can occur that can be severe. tell your doctor about new or worsening eye problems such as eye pain or vision changes including blurred vision, joint aches and pain, or a parasitic infection. don't change or stop asthma medicines without talking to your doctor. healing from within is a wonderful thing. ask your child's eczema specialist how dupixent can help heal their skin from within. listen up, you dogs with allergic itch! today's talking lesson is just one word: apoquel. ap--o--quel. ♪ you can't teach your itchy dog to talk... ...so, talk to your vet about apoquel. apoquel is for the control of allergic itch in dogs. do not use apoquel in dogs with serious infections. apoquel may increase the chances of developing serious infections... ...and may cause existing parasitic skin infections or pre-existing cancers to worsen. new neoplasias have been observed. i'm glad we speak the same language. ask your vet for apoquel. it's something about having that piece of paper. some people think that's worth more than my skills. i've run this place for 20 years, but i still need to prove that i'm more than what you see on paper. you gotta be so good they can't ignore you. it's the way my mind works. i have a very mechanical brain. analytics and empathy. that's how i gain clients. i am more... i'm more than who i am on paper. ♪ >> coast to coast with stories that matter most. you're watching local news, with people magazine's sexiest man alive from 1994-2007, chet van jansen. and now, here's chet! >> greg: thank you. thank you. all right. yep, it's local news where each guest has to share a story wherever they're from and then i vote on a winner and that person gets to ♪ >> we interrupt gutfeld for this breaking news. serial streaker and disgraced newsman chet van jansen has been stripped of nearly all his sexiest man alive titles. this after he was arrested for lewd behavior at a golf tournament in arizona. stunned witnesses say he could be heard shouting, who wants to see my hole in one? surprisingly, editors at people magazine allowed chet to keep his 2007 crown because he deserved that one. we'll keep you updated on this developing story. now back to gutfeld. [cheers and applause] >> greg: another tough break for chet. we're praying that he gets better. kat, why don't you go first >> kat: yes! in the detroit area, there are about a hundred cats and kittens available for adoption because they were found in a disgusting hoarding situation. and that's sad. but let me just say, you don't know what love is until you've been loved by a feral cat because they hate, they're hateful creature and aren't bound by any normal constraints of society they bite and claw and don't care but then they'll love you and only you. >> greg: this was your philosophy when you were date going >> kat: i think it's nice to be obsessed over yes. >> greg: all right. what about you my sflefriend? >> walter: well out in montana a bull has gone missing not just any bull a bull with a blond shaking hair cut which makes it especially mysterious that it hasn't been found. but as montanans know there's a way to find a bull. you put a cow out in the field. so i think before she runs for president, meghan markle should be brought to montana. >> greg: look at that hair. you're right. that's like a bull's version of justin bieber. he's got bangs. >> walter: exactly. it's a rock star. drop meghan markle in a field and stand back with tell cops and wait for it to appear snoop sounds like a fun television show. >> greg: mike what's your local news. >> mike: walter i didn't see that meghan markle tie in at all. idaho is the place and i'm proud to say that the people of idaho are drinking more than ever. and in 2022, idahoians broke sales records at liquor stores by topping 300 million onin the fiscal year of 2022 and as you know the fiscal year ends june 30th or whatever, but they broke the record again this year, 2023 by purchasing some $322 million worth of booze. >> greg: what do you attribute that to? living in idaho? >> mike: no, just being good citizens and wanting to keep the economy moving. >> greg: that's good. >> mike: what they're saying is we're actually drinking less in idaho but spending more on the booze we're drinking. tito's vodka comes in number one, i don't get number three which is fireball cinnamon whiskey. >> tyrus: i just was in idaho they know how to party. i did a standup show. i kept hearing clank because everybody brought a bottle. >> mike: gin was nowhere to be found but if you're drinking in idaho you should be drinking at the stage coach in boise the finest bar restaurant establishment in the country >> kat: ughh. i don't like fine bars. >> mike: my gosh there's a picture of the stage coach right there. look at that. >> greg: all right tyrus. >> tyrus: all right, once again arrogant people in massachusetts, three whales caught on camera breaching together in massachusetts and a family fishing off the coast in massachusetts had the gall to say this is so rare and we can't believe we saw this and it's once in a lifetime. no they do it all the time they just don't like being individual yesterday by nosy ass people. people always do this they see an animal do something in mother nature. this is the first time. no, you just showed up right place. that's their weekend. it's choreographed. obviously the three of them working on some kind of boy band and they have aspirations of greatness and the next greenpeace meeting they'll break out their songs and it's all ruined now because the competition can see it because they videotaped it. it's cool, a great moment but don't ruin it with expertise. so many idiots, you saw a cool thing it happens all the time and again it just goes back to how well the fish and animal conservation is going in massachusetts with the fishermen have brought the whales back and sharks back overpopulation of seals, we never hear all the things in america, oh, we don't do this and that, our wildlife is doing fine and thriving. [cheers and applause] >> greg: can i see the video again? it's interesting i was looking at that and i want to add my $0.02 to see it's really nice to see the view is going out on the road s >> up next d postmenopausal women with hr+ her2- metastatic breast cancer are living longer with kisqali. so, long live family time. long live dreams. and long live you. kisqali is a pill proven to help women live longer when taken with an aromatase inhibitor. and kisqali helps preserve quality of life. so you're not just living, you're living well. kisqali can cause lung problems or an abnormal heartbeat which can lead to death. it can cause serious skin reactions, liver problems, and low white blood cell counts that may result in severe infections. avoid grapefruit during treatment. tell your doctor right away if you have new or worsening symptoms, including breathing problems, cough, chest pain, a change in your heartbeat, dizziness, yellowing of the skin or eyes, dark urine, tiredness, loss of appetite, abdomen pain, bleeding, bruising, fever, chills, or other symptoms of an infection, a severe or worsening rash, are or plan to become pregnant, or breastfeeding. long live hugs and kisses. ask about kisqali. and long live life. so much more now? 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i think it's a shakedown >> tyrus: no, we always say this, kat, you back me up. everyone should be heard. and i read the whole article looking for something, but if it's one person? but it's several, and the incidents, you have the performers, you have the stripers, you have shakedowns and phones being -- like one woman was so scared she soiled herself and then they gave her a see through outfit to wear. here's the thing about -- you portray, especially with weight. people like to portray for attention that that's how they want to be but when the camera's off they're unhappy they're miserable they don't like getting looked at. deep down she wants to be recognized inform her talent but she's made herself a circus spectacle and she's bitter so what do you do? you project and take it out on the other women around you who look just like you but demoral eyes them to feel better about yourself. lizzo, this is probably -- my rule is, if it's one, it could be a shake down or something shady but in my opinion when you get numbers coming forward that's kind of hard to fight off. so it's interesting because she's so quick to want to cancel everybody else, let's see what happens they literally have to eat their own now. literally on he-. >> greg: don't eat your own. going to take a long time. >> mike: i believe she already has. >> greg: last word mikey. >> mike: so, yeah, if it turns out to be true i'll be sad. i have every lizzo eight track that she's put out. to kat's point, i thought it was a real solid one here which is when you put yourself out there to be self righteous and really a good, solid person, better than everyone else, it's going to come back and bite you in your really big ass. >> greg: yes. all right, that's why i have the reputation of a [bleep]. ha ha. you'll never bee mlb chooses t-mobile for business for 5g solutions... ...to not only enhance the fan experience, but to advance how the game is played. now's the time to see what america's largest 5g network can do for your business. trying vapes to quit smoking might feel like progress, but with 3x more nicotine than a pack of cigarettes - vapes increase cravings - trapping you in an endless craving loop. nicorette reduces cravings until they're gone for good. ♪ when you have chronic kidney disease... there are places you'd like to be. like here. and here. not so much here. if you have chronic kidney disease, farxiga can help you keep living life. ♪ farxiga ♪ and farxiga reduces the risk of kidney failure, which can lead to dialysis. farxiga can cause serious side effects including dehydration, urinary tract or genital yeast infections in women and men, and low blood sugar. ketoacidosis is a serious side effect that may lead to death. a rare life-threatening bacterial infection in the skin of the perineum could occur. stop taking farxiga and call your doctor right away if you have symptoms of this bacterial infection, an allergic reaction, or ketoacidosis. farxiga can help you keep living life. ask your doctor for farxiga for chronic kidney disease. if you can't afford your medication, astrazeneca may be able to help. ♪ farxiga ♪ ow! uh oh. you, ok? no... i mean yeah. -just hit my melon. -yikes! should we see a doctor? i can't tell a doctor i slipped on a toy. i'm a triathlete! i had a concussion. most happen doing ordinary things. sometimes the tough thing to do is to get help to prevent serious damage. i like your sensitive side. don't mess with your melon. if you hit it, get it checked. >> greg: we are out of time. thank you walter kirn, mike baker, kat timpf, tyrus, august 5, 2023. i'm jon scott, thanks for watching the weekend show next. ♪ >> hello, i'm charlie hurt along with katie package and kennedy. welcome to the big weekend show. big story tonight, donald trump with a third indictment this week, this time from biden's department of justice or the 2020 election january 6. former president trump. in d.c. federal court thursday pleading not guilty to all charges. continues to maintain innocence speaking to supporters of the