[cheers and applause] greg as we turn a corner on covid, what new crisis is the media consumed with . Shark attacks . Alien invasions . Invasions . See and then cnns disastrous ratings which are now officially lower than the odds that Cats Marriage lasts a month. [laughs] The New York Times dives headfirst into the evils of bathing. Yes, bathing. Covid has shown that bathing daily is not only not unnecessary, its evil. The pigpen is finally vindicated. Im old. No wonder the media adores antifa, the filthy scum. It it seems bathing harms the planet. They couldve said that bathing is racist, because most bars of soap are white. Its called ivory, not ebony. That is racist. We will be right back. The article starts by offering Anecdotal Evidence that the pandemic is causing people to be a plus the proof, parents planing about their smelly teenage kids. Talk about hardhitting data. By that logic, the pandemic also cause acne and terrible taste in music. By the way, teenagers are like cheese. They are supposed to smell, so ive been told. Thank you. Then the british survey, 70 of rates have stopped bathing. One look at harry would tell you that it raises the question, how could you tell . Was that before or after they stopped brushing her teeth . Maybe they just want to be friends. Anyway, like all lame stories, thats cool to you for being normal, they relied on people in their own circle to interview. Like heather, a writer. Who would a writer for the times interview but another writer . God forbid they find a plumber or a stripper. Or a plumber who strips. Thats someone who appreciates a good shower. Other claims for Shower Use has fallen off by 20 , and her ability to find a date, 80 . I hope they factcheck this by spelling her armpits. That does explain the other article about a declining Birth Rates. The science is settled, heather stinks. Then the times goes on to explain that daily showers or new phenomenon growing out of the industrial age. Perhaps like penicillin or indoor plumbing or missing fingers. A site yet another writer, whats with the writers . Who is also an environmentalist. He bathes once a week, his talk must have more rings than saturn. This is all good, since reducing the use of soap helps the environment as opposed to his underwear which is probably funkier than rick james. He explains how he would wash at the sink under our armpits and her privates. In his 60s, which leaves me with quite a visual. Last night i had a nightmare about Wolf Blitzer in front of a brush. The times built an article around a writer in interviewing other writers about how theyve given up looking presentable. It did they ever plan to leave the house again . For our sake, lets hope they dont. Thats one way to get us all wearing masks. The nickel just by telling us that a typical eight minute Shower Uses up to 17 gallons of water. Is that supposed to be a lot . 1 gallon of Almond Milk or to slash whatever Brian Seltzer had for lunch. [laughter] they also try to shame us for using soap because its made of petroleum. At this is all coming from a newspaper, which is made of trees to produce each weeks Sunday Paper alone, its estimated that a half billion trees must be murdered, slowly cut down, dismembered, and turned into pulp by oil guzzling power tools. At the times has been doing that since 1851. If trees could talk, they would call the times hitler, and they would probably sound like john kerry. Once again, the superior minds of the times tells us we are living selfishly. Dont bathe, they say after screaming at us if we werent constantly scrubbing up like were doing surgery. Not a single Editor Writer complies with their own prescriptions. Writing about is their sacrifice. It do as i write, not as i do. Its no wonder that while their editors claim not to take about, the people actually is. Its a lead is him without a whiff of ironing, and thats why their dirty drawers arent the other only things that stink. Welcome to knights guests, he so southern her Horoscope Sign is buttermilk. David mcdowell. He is the mayor of hands of the town, one. Fox friends weekend cohost. If laughter is contagious, he will make you double mask. Comedian , and she is no longer. Now that shes married, she will soon be buried. Fox News Contributor time to go to you first, you dont like to wash your hands, ive seen you near back there. Today you saw me in the bathroom. Greg you dont really know what to say when you see someone you know in the bathroom. You do have conversation . Because of my reputation, i felt the need to clearly openly wash my hands in front of you. Greg if theres another weird side to you, you have the stench he candles in your office to cover up your own stench. Maybe had been showering a little bit less than most people on a regular basis. Its the one you agree with this article . Its weird. Your commentary about john kerry, that picture, he looks like the trees from the lord of the rings. If you look close enough. You and you know how you figure out how old he is . Yeah, anyway. I dominic are you in sync, birthrates would be up and showers would remain where they are. Maybe its because the Birth Rate is down is because people are showering last. How appealing is your nonshowering Husband Or Wife whos like, im just phoning in covid. Greg how many kids do you have . Speak well tell you this, and they stink. One day of the kid not showering, two, then they take their shoes off and their socks off disgusting. Greg Boys Tennis shoes, its like a landfill filled with used diapers. Ive thrown them all in one shower. Its disgusting. Thats why i dont have kids. I cant stand smelly offspring. If it were my own kids, i would hate them even more for their smell. Because they let me down. You know, i think this is the liberal thing. I think this is a liberal thing. Conservatives take showers. Maybe, finally, these liberals can start to smell their own. Listen, this is an excuse for them to not take a shower. They want to save the planet, save the water, and now they dont have to use soap. We dont have to use Animal Products anymore. They want a final reason, these people havent taken a shower before covid, this is nothing new at all. Greg also comments like its really great for them because they dont really socialize with other people. You confessed yesterday that you stopped bathing. Not stopped i paid less, and i actually on the weekends, if im not seeing anybody, i will not brush my teeth. The mask covers up halitosis. Nobody knows. I mean, im alone. Greg you wear a mask alone . Because the dogs dont care. They smell like dog food. I love the idea, i read this article in The New York Times, youre making a face. Greg im still thinking about you not brushing your teeth. I brushed my teeth before this show. I left my hairbrush, and i didnt realize it until like 10 minutes before the show, i was like oh. I used my Tooth Brush to brush my hair. I had no choice. I read that article in the times, and i love the idea of a liberal trying to signal how virtuous they are with Eye Watering Body odor. Like, the stronger the stench, the more progressive you are. Like so rank that youd leave a vapor trail. It is greg yes, you know what it is . You are the whiff of welcome. That is the whiff of woke. Nobody remembers him. Think about like a combination of smelling like fritos, wet dog, and like steamy feet. What are you telling everyone else, youre a vegan . You work in an animal shelter, and i ride my bike everywhere . Greg if you have all of that odor, you are probably in antifa, the only group that will accept somebody who smells that bad. Before you got married, you were filthy. She has cleaned up a little bit. I would walk to her office to talk about the latest thing she screwed up, i would have to walk over things i couldnt recognize. Its still like that. I prefer clutter to. Actually, in the pandemic i was i have to admit i was not washing my hair, i was showering but not washing my hair. Only was i going to be on camera what i wash my hair. All of the blogs are like, dont wash her hair every day, i was like okay blogs, i believe you. Then the show became everyday, i started having to wash my hair. I know this because after i went one day, i was going to come to work without washing my hair. I asked kam, can i get away with this, some dry shampoo . You know what he said . Would you like me to tell you the truth . Which means i looks like a disgusting Grease Ball and i did wash my hair, you are welcome. Because going to say no, you guys look exactly like. It was just an honest mistake. The idea of bathing, is that still a thing . The idea of laying in your own scrub mist, do you wash and a bath . I think weve advanced from bathing. I think you you lay in the filth that you soaked off . The only people who do that are cowboys and westerns. To smoking a cigar, theyve got their foot up, and theres like hardwood floors. Of i did that on sunday, but i had my greg do you have a spittoon in your bathroom . No, maybe i will take that up. There was another article in the times that we didnt get to, an editor, a times editor suggested marking the end of a pandemic by everybody in america getting one week off. In order for her to get the week off and everybody at the times restaurants would have to close, bus drivers, stores, because nobody can work. Im thinking, only a writer can pretend to go off the grid so people who havent worked for year i would like to take a honeymoon you can only go camping. Id be down for camping. You know, and denver realized growing up, cheap vacation. Whenever i bring it up to kim, hes like, why would i do that . I got paid to go camping. I had to thank him for his service in the conversation is over. Greg you put the cam in camping. Up next, the plane isnt the bennetts really know how to put their wifi to work. Whether its work work. Works for me. School work. It worked or a work out. Oh im working. Theyve got xfinity, which delivers wifi faster than a gig for all their devices. Its more than enough to keep everyone working. Can your internet do that . This is work this is hard now xfinity delivers wifi speed faster than a gig. That means youll have Gig Speed over wifi to power a house full of devices. Learn more about Gig Speed today. Greg according to the faa or the number of Airline Passengers ignoring Covid Protocols is rising faster than cats Husbands Therapy bills. Incidents include customers not only refusing to wear masks, and even fighting crewmembers. When did airplanes become the bar from roadhouse . As of february 1st, wearing a Mask On commercial flights became federal flight drama club. Anywhere from nine to 30,000 fine. Thats more than i make in the day. And the number of people is still 40 slower than it was prepandemic. I have no patience for people who Throw Tantrums come i get the frustration. When people act like airborne idiots, the airlines cracked down on the rest of us. Faa rules are arbitrary and constantly changing. To some airlines act like youre flying with a tribalists stressful enough without Flight Attendants going Code Red because their toddlers fussy or you pull down your mask to pop in a peanuts. If your Flight Attendant, remember we are all in in this together. If your joker might leave your emotional baggage where it belongs, at home. Have you noticed this happening with you at all Airline Tussles . I never wear a mask, this is how i do it. They say you dont have to wear one on the plane if youre eating. I grabbed my water, some peanuts, i cut all of my peanuts and half so i can have enough peanuts to eat for the entire flight. I eat one peanut every 14 minutes, and as soon as the fight is over, im full of peanuts, my tummy is hurting, ive got to take some pepto listen, had my mask of the whole entire time. I dont have to deal with it. Its ridiculous, i see them taking them off babies. Greg im actually for it. Babies are awful. Honestly, who cares about babies anyway . They dont allow basing but they do allow babies . Be when you have seven kids under ten and a wife. When you fly, that comes to a total of nine people. You have a greater odd of creating a problem of anybody on the flight to. You know what peoples faces look like when we walked down the aisle . Greg they think youre the occult of little people. All these little masks. Anyway, has anybody bothered you . No. I instill a lot of fear and the kids to behave. If it comes down to the position of Flight Attendants. Theres so many wonderful Flight Attendants that look at you and say, i get what you are dealing with. Im going to show you some grace, stay on your kids a little bit and do me a favor. Its when the [bleep] individuals or Flight Attendant or Crew Member who is looking for the gig, looking for the one little down. Do you keep lots of food in front of them, thats easy. As much as i hated, ive had to fly a ton in the last year its the rule at this point. If you dont want to wear a mask, dont Go On a flight. I dont like it, i dont agree with that, it is what it is. I also bring a hat, a gallic this, i pull my mask down and a Breathe Greg that allows your nose to be free. Your good. Greg thats right, you do fox and friends. Every once in a while. Greg that must cost a lot to fly with nine people. Its two rows. It must be one that must wipe out your savings every trip. You can afford it, i cant. See when i went to pick at your libertarian sensibilities here. I feel like the problem with Mask Reinforcement is it creates another Failure Bullet that allows for conflict like selling cigarettes. No one wants to get a fight over a mask, but were creating another opportunity to create tragedy. I agree, its also been irresponsible in terms of the way the narrative has been framed this whole time. Theres this narrative there are two groups of people, the responsible people who are vaccinated but still going to wear to masks, even outside. Then theres the Psycho Rednecks who would never get vaccinated, they Go On a plane and theyre told to wear a mask, theyre going to throw a suitcase at your place in honor of donald trump. There are plenty of reasonable people out there, many of us who are vaccinated, some of us precisely because we are vaccinated are quite frankly beyond sick of this [bleep]. During a suitcase at Someones Head is psycho, but also demanding that people wear a mask when they are outside at a Baseball Game and eight section four vaccinated people or they get thrown out, thats psycho, too. I will take the Suitcase Throwing Psycho over the authoritarian psycho any day of the week. If they are more fun. Risky, but fun. Is the one especially when the suitcase is filled with vaccines. I dont know, how do you feel about this . Since i am a Redneck Psycho [applause] people have forgotten how to behave in [bleep] public. Theyve been locked down the whole time, and they get on airplanes, put the Mask On. Period. Listen, if i can control myself even in on an airplane before the Mask Mandate Anybody can. I go from Defcon 5 to devcon 1, and ive never been arrested. Despite copious amounts of alcohol when on a plane i mean, i want to go off on somebody before the pandemic for taking a Flip Flop off and shoving his hairy toes between the seat, putting his feet up. You know, he looked down and do you see some hair covered toes. Thats enough, thats enough for me to take out four or five rows. Greg if youre sitting like this in your chair, and you like this and theres a foot that comes up over here, its like you should be able to grab it and then any kind of sharp object, clip of one of those no one would charge you. Of course that person should lose a toe. You could throw the Tote Everyone could throw the total rounds, we celebrate. Greg theyve decided to his over Snow Whites case. At disneyland, wherever that is has revamped its Snow White writing. The san francisco Gate Isnt thrilled to get it in an editorial, the famous case is considered problematic to them. Snow white is poisoned by the evil queen, True Loves first case breaks the spell. Then shes eaten by dwarves. Thats in my version. The dwarves always prevail. I insert dwarves into everything. To try it with every book or story, insert the dwarves. It makes everything better. Including the godfather, totally changed the ending. The problem Katie Dowd and julie tremaine, is that the kisses without her consent. While shes asleep, she can put in, cannot possibly be True Love if only one person knows its happening. Its hard to understand why the disneyland of 2021 would choose to add a scene with such oldfashioned ideas of what a man is allowed to do to a woman. I double byline, as we call it. Consent issues aside, it still a very realistic story. You know, from the days when traveling royalty would kiss unconscious women in the Class Coffins while surrounded by a bunch of Diamond Mining dwarves. That should be taken as literally as the talking mouse for your rich Duck Uncle who doesnt wear pants. I never liked that dock. It kind of perverted. I know your hot on the story, what are your feelings about this . What do you think . Obviously, thats a problem, he shouldnt do that. Snow white is kind of an idiot, right . Just dont move into some random dirty Bachelor Pad with seven dudes he met in the woods. And like they are only letting you stay there because you clean the house for them first. If i wouldve watched this growing up, i wouldve thought there would be no hope for a slob like me to find a husband at the ripe young age of 32 and half. I would watch these movies going up and i would say, wouldnt be prince and princess, the dash what does she want to do . I wasnt a gender studies professor, it was a 4yearold. I was able to look at this and be like, this doesnt seem like real life and we would have those conversations. These stereotypes come from somewhere, i think its better to talk about them with kids. If i am four, and i realize its not real then probably other 4yearolds can do it. Greg i always thought you didnt like the doors because they were short. Thats what this is about. This is about lookism. Snow white was just attractive, right . This is what its about. They are coming after her for that. Why is the evil Queen Evil . She is given like fierce a bad rap. No angels moving in with seven dudes. Exactly. Is this really the worst that organization. I went to Disney World when i was three, both my grandmothers took me. You know what . That Giant Rat looks 50 feet tall when youre three. Hes got that weird creepy girlfriend, and then youre in Cinderellas Castle perpetuating the myth that you just need to wait around for some dreamboat like pete coming to rescue you for your frat life. I can come a huge setback for women for generations. Greg forget disneyland, you should go to handsome town. A population, one. Should they make Snow White more woke . Would that help . I thought she was anyway . Why not snow black . I thought she was out of the door anyway. Why are we defending her being kissed . I probably wouldve guessed her too. Shes cute, look at her, look at Snow White. This is ridiculous. I thought she was counseled already. Greg my suggestions, i came up with some. They should remake Snow White, makes no way to a biological male who identifies as an Intersectional Female perhaps a member of blm or antifa and Prince Charming is actually a body positive Trans Activist who teaches Drag Performance to runaway teens in a local park. Again, he got 17, 18 kids. You probably know this story by heart. I do know the story by heart. Doesnt Prince Charming save her life . Did i miss a detail here . He saved my life i dont know, if you are down and the only option was some random guy kissing you to save your life, i would say youd be into that. Its because thats a Tuesday Afternoon for me. You know how often i use that line . Because thats not true. Dont greg welcome back, lets find out if we got anything wrong so far this week. I always get Deja Vu when i do that. For that, we go to our shows own bosman, Steve Jr. We went to college together, but we went our separate ways after graduation. It hes here to point out any mistakes we made. How do we do . Thats the game were playing, we went our separate ways . Okay, whatever. That makes it easier for you to live with yourself, go ahead and live the lie. Greg do you want me to go there . Im not the one with the show. Ive got nothing to lose. Dont dont put me in a corner. Greg i thought maybe we could get beyond this, and concentrate on the present. Lets bring that up in session. Lets talk about this week. This week, a mixed bag for you, frankly. And the Accuracy Department lets start monday, monday you seemed gender confused. Im going to ask our talented Director Mike to roll that clip. We should get rid of all gender, all sports should just have no gender. If you want to play pro sports, Everybody Jump on in and pick the best. Let me see if i can boil this down for you. Everything you said that there is totally wrong and destructive and indefensible. Let me share some research which, frankly, is something that you should do before you appear on television, you know supported cable television, so the show participating in sports makes girls confident, have of all girls quit sports by the age of 17 according to an australian study. Your idea here it would be to essentially eliminate Girls Sports and the pathway to selfesteem. I know that your experience with women is limited to those with severe selfesteem issues, but think about this you are now on the side of the nonbinary Gender Fluid people. He, some men can get pregnant people. You want to explain that . Whats going on . The one im going to tell you i should have been clearer, i want to eliminate all sports. I think that sports only benefits one person an entire town, Everybody Else is npc, we are all on playing characters. I was on a football team, i was on the third string you know why . We were there so the other strings could practice against us. We were practice dummies. Thats why. Thats why i hate sports. Because this is been fantastic. I think youve done some i really applaud the Work Youve done here. The stuff we can bring Up Next time in session, it will be great. Hold that feeling. Greg im holding it. I want you to come back to that place. You chimed in here first of all, congratulations on your wedding. Honestly, i think you married the wrong guy. Tuesday, you are unclear about an important issue you want to run that . I just dont get how a prenup would work. Ive been a wife for three days, keep in mind, im an expert on this. Im just like you do the thing, you take this we say i do. If you have a prenup coming in not saying i do, i do but if i dont sign this. A look, whats done is done. A prenup is really just a document that both parties agree to that help them protect the wealth each brings to the marriage and accumulates throughout. Thats probably less relevant for you since your currently on the gutfeld show. Lets be honest, not a terrific career move. According to renowned financial advisors whose ornament, you should always get a prenup. If you cannot talk money to the person you are about to marry, you are doomed for failure, because money is going to run through your relationship more than anything else. Keeping a separate Checking Account Wont do it, divorced experts say because you keep your name on an Account Or Finance it separate or even on the deed to the house, it doesnt mean its yours. Tell Mike N a divorce. My husband is in finance, and he went to Boarding School growing up, so do the math that they are. And who is suze . Whatever her faces, i would like her to stay out of my marriage. If she doesnt, she will pay. Has she been talking to him . So much pain. Ask yourself this, why did my financial Expert Fancy educated husband say any of this to me . Whats his angle . He hasnt been talking to sues because he respects me. I am all you need. Forever. Speak of the real question here is, why didnt you marry me . I sent you letters, i sent you gifts. Why did you hurt me like that . J. K. , lol, just kidding. I wish you the best, im here. Im here. On wednesday, you seemed baffled by recent events. I hear this a lot for my drivers. Wearing a mask in a car and you are alone, you hyperventilate. You are breathing in your carbon dioxide, you get dizzy, and ive heard anecdotally im not going to say its a fact, maybe i will. Its causing an increase dramatic increase in car accidents. This is really weird for me because youre kind of half right, which i like to say half wrong, but a national Highway Traffic SafetyAdministration Report found that the rate of Traffic Deaths per myles tate go up during covid. Lets celebrate a win. Not because of mask wearing. At least a b shows it was the near empty streets that resulted in faster driving, which in turn made to streets more deadly. A Faster Travel Whether or not exceeding the Speed Limit increases the chance of mortality is. Ask yourself this, why do you think that people in a car tend to hyperventilate so much . What is it that youre doing in your car that causes you to hyperventilate and to breathe heavily . Is this why your Goober Rating is so low you know what, dont answer. I dont answer. We will keep the show super upscale. Lets move on. Are you here . Huge fan. Just want to clarify, you said wearing a mask hides bad breath, but recently dentists have said is really force you to realize how bad your breath has always been for other people. You understand the difference . Yeah, but ive got sunshine in my mouth, so there really is no problem. I get it. Are you there pete . Huge fan. Do you do such great work on this network. I have no idea why you are doing the show, but i want to say you are right about that. According to alpine. Com, showers are much cleaner than baths, baths are more psychologically beneficial so the recommendation frankly is to take a shower, get super clean, and then sit in a warm bath, which means of course, twice the water use. It just by saying this, because that new york times reporters had to explode. The opposite of what i said, which is take a bath and then shower . Precisely. Greg weve got to take a shower. Dual greg pence, he takes a bath. The one im going to take a bath on your face. Yes. Maybe that might turn you on, we have to go, steve. Great job. Its been a joy as always. I appreciate the time, and i appreciate just going down Memory Lane with you. Greg returned my tax, okay . We can work on this. One day at a time. Time. Greg goodbye. 18 gets cheated to win queen, and now shes going to the bennetts really know how to put their wifi to work. Whether its work work. Works for me. School work. It worked or a work out. Oh im working. Theyve got xfinity, which delivers wifi faster than a gig for all their devices. Its more than enough to keep everyone working. Can your internet do that . This is work this is hard now xfinity delivers wifi speed faster than a gig. That means youll have Gig Speed over wifi to power a house full of devices. Learn more about Gig Speed today. Which shows will you be getting into tonight . How bout all of them. Netflix. Cause Xfinity gets you really into your shows. When one burns for someone who does not feel the same. Daphne, lets switch. From live tv to sports on the go. Felix at the finish you can even watch your dvr from anywhere. Okay, thats just showing off. You get all of this on x1. So Go On, get really into your shows. You need a breath mint. Xfinity. Its a way better way to watch. Greg she won Homecoming Queen, now shes facing 16. The teenager in florida, where most teens are located, helped her Mother Wouldnt tell Mike Rig an election will be charged as an adult even though she was just 17 at the time. Just at 17, totally datable by leo dicaprio. Emily rose Grovers Mother used her position as an assistant principal, to access the fraudulent votes for her daughter last year, students have reported that emily helped her mother do it. If theres ever been a crime Youd Blame on an emily, this is it. She faces multiple Felony Charges and 16 years in prison. 16 years as a long time. To put that in perspective, if cat went away 16 years, she would be 50 when she gets out. Were they too lenient . How do you set the example if you dont throw the book at her . I dont know, i think 16 seems a little harsh considering what people are getting out of jail for and did not even arrested. His Capital Punishment on the table . Never. Look, i think its very interesting, the valleys this mother instilled in her daughter. Some moms would say, popularity isnt everything. It doesnt matter if its only four years. At this mom said, absolutely not, i will not have you spend three months having people think youre not the most popular girl at school, we will risk prison for this. I think almost to the prison is like the tip of the iceberg in terms of issues that emily is probably facing with her having her mother like that. The one do you think this is a fair punishment . She shouldve sold some shoes from Footlocker Or Something if she didnt want to go to jail. Just be one thats true. In california you can steal hundreds of Dollars Worth of stuff, and they let you out. At this girl is going to go to prison for the rest of her life if she doesnt live very long. All to be Homecoming Queen, all to be on the homecoming court. People like and meek and blue and tackle you from the stands while you are standing over there, all you are so superior with your Crown Greg i sense some background there appeared homecoming is a Trigger Word for me. By the way, High School sucks. Greg it does. Its supposed to suck. Greg the whole concept of Homecoming Queen is why it sucks. It doesnt add it goes back to my sports analogy. All of this is to benefit one person, and we are all npcs, nonplaying characters. In less you are the one shannon we are out of time. To set your dvr every week Fox News at night with Ivo Welcome to Watters World im Jesse Watters breaking Tonight Brand new information backing the Lab League Theory of covid19. This as President Biden Hasnt even bothered to ask china about it. There could be a reason for that involving Doctor Anthony Fauci and the scientific community may be covering it all up. Why . For money Nicholas Wade investigative reporter who covered science for almost 30 years at The New York Times just wrote an article