Transcripts For DW Love And Sex In Russia 20240709

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a special country he land from above. starts december 27th on d, w. ah, russia, the largest country on earth bound since the fall of the soviet union, its population has declined by 5000000 men here have one of the lowest life expectancies in europe. alcohol, drugs and tobacco are all too often to blame. leading to a clear agenda, imbalance, women make up the majority of the population, 54 percent, placing them under even greater pressure to marry and have children at a young age. zenia is marrying her partner carol in a traditional christian orthodox ceremony. his views can only be described as conservative. yes, because the new born there, forwarding to our tradition susan men, are both politically and intellectually superior to women. richard dylan were the patriarchal attitude is also embodied by president vladimir putin. his carefully staged media events promote a return to tradition and conventional notions of masculinity. many russian women are paying a high price. 60 percent of marriages here end in divorce, leaving many children to grow up without a father. domestic violence is rampant. it's estimated that a woman dies at the hands of her partner, every 40 minutes here, and the state sites with the perpetrators. an alarming number of domestic violence cases go unpunished. game. in moscow and saint petersburg, a small minority of young people, a starting to rebel against patriarchy, and call for greater sexual freedom. and yet, most russian, women still lead a life marked my personal and social restrictions. in the largest country in the world, love and sex are still dominated by patriarchy. the syrian off family is reminiscing about one of the most emotional moments of their lives. president vladimir putin, publicly on them for their dedication. ah, they meet you, my is green, you flow australia there was no stanley is you know me or i just use little you're more than just purely junior. what me she was measurements, go to register on the lowest. i'm also going to have less than only fill him the national orchestra, a groom. i'm so happy. the syrian off sa considered a model family as a married couple with many children. they represent the ideal in a nation, grappling with demographic change. their way to brazil, i'll attach it just like, put in the dark when you're moving on we lovely, grassy. when would you usually to cut them a couple so awesome selves if it's even worth having children, a story mistook more maybe our sample will encourage them to go for it was we bullshit proteins, model family lives, 1300 kilometers east of moscow into a working class city of about 1000000 for the past 15 years, they've called this high rise home. i'm to eat, hayden o. 5 daughters, 2 sons. such large families are the exception in russia, where most women only have one child for the government. they're a welcome sight, i wish you go ahead help you. so do you want a part number? yeah. do not. when it ral son comes back from military service every 2 weeks we go all out on the last. we spoiled him so he doesn't forget it. oh wow, appraisal all of them were peggy. larissa is a home maker. i knew we did bottle youngest, but i wait till everyone's finished, then i can eat and paste, but out as otherwise i have to get up and fix this and that the whole time is to put in. you see that he acts like he's just a guest. here we go. new. the new kitchen isn't my thing. yeah. wow. alexei is a chauffeur. he owns the equivalent of $800.00 euros a month, just above average here. they're $55.00 square. meta apartment is a bit cramped for a family of 9. what did not have gone the, this is our living room and bedroom, my wife and i sleep here are tanya and natasha here and rosie parker in the winter, i go to school by myself. ah. what it is is the girls rip where nastier masha and katya sleep nicer. marsha, ye, garcia. he is the boy's room. the one i was going to please let him hear you, and this is victor. what did on as well or did this, victor, alexei and larissa got married back in soviet days when they were 22. contraceptives were hard to come by back then. some that you're so young here but strong. no, yes, strong. that is, some people made fun of us. we should, they said stop, you just made yourselves miserable, but it was none of their business when yellow knew we never planned on having so many kids knew. so we just love each other so much in the soviet era, large families were frowned upon and were usually among the poorest. today, the state rewards large families with a bonus equivalent to about 6200 euros for the birth of each child. after the 1st, that's about a year's salary here. xenia and korea live in gotcha a town about 40 kilometers from st. petersburg. they live in a typical middle class neighborhood in an apartment that they own. he's a cook. she's a hairdresser. they met 3 years ago. what do we want for dinner professionally? no idea. so i'll just have to come up with something again, which i sure that you like what? we don't really talk it over here. mostly i do it because i am a cook. oh feature. he cooks so quickly and it's always delicious for a former. well that you know, the, if i sometimes ask her to cook, she will reasonable women shouldn't forget how to make boot a few shrew senior. and carol were married in a civil ceremony last week. their church wedding is taking place to morrow. the big event she lived was what luke? i saw susanna as wedding ring, a silver mine is gold, which symbolizes the sun. the man should shine and the woman represents balance. and the night, the lord carroll and casino, like 75 percent of russians are christian orthodox. they place a high value on tradition. and carol is the quintessential macho russian man. then we're husband is very hungry. the weather, let's pick a show 1st then we can eat with richard dylan. women are deep thinkers, goober mostly. when the samo, it's only natural that we're head of the household. recently had an onion as well as 100. if i ever actually disagree with him, i didn't know that which is a pretty unlikely thought out. look at, he'll have the last word to look it up. a serious law would still to please us will visit men have to deal with difficult things like buying an apartment. when you are a woman might be able to do it, but not with as much confidence as usual would be less. she'd have a hard time with the negotiations. will really work. soccer, carol's, sexist views, don't really seem to bother senior, according to russian tradition. she'll spend the night before the wedding away from her groom. see you in the morning, but by less absolutely. i'll miss you. miss you take that old spirit seniors booked a room in a hotel. she won't see her husband again till the morning. it's 8 in the morning and the big day is about to begin. oh but good morning. stylus was i've arrived irina the hairdresser has already been married twice when she gives the young bride a few tips. raska, how are things good when are you guys happy then no stress, right? yeah, free aren't you now? and then you have to be understanding each other as important. as a woman, you have to be patient to person. certain you should know that a lot of men cheat, mister. sometimes it's better to stay single. could you just see what i'm talking about it yet? the majority of russian men admit to being unfaithful. oh, here comes the handsome guy. so. hello, gorgeous. yes, lou, the ceremony is taking place in this early 20th century. wooden church and orthodox priest will greet the couple and then perform the ceremony. oh. uses different will you take xenia as your wife image? i do or is willing you will you take carol as your husband uses for you to see bill morrison will give you a new yes. and when you look at the why, when the praised places the crowns on their heads, they are officially married, king and queen of their household. oh, the fall of communism, brought religion back to every day. life living russians rediscovered their faith and the church sought to establish itself as a moral authority, a whole new logo on to the amazon or walmart, or to perform the most faithful people. those who pray devoutly are better able to cope with life's challenges and resist the devil's temptation. they also have a positive demographic impact, margaret believe is, are more likely to have children very she bullshit. let us in most couples in russia have a church, wedding senior and carols reception is that a hotel with friends and family. with the celebration will also include a few time honored tradition. ah, ah, a round of applause for the couple. congratulations. the traditional bread ritual is a must be a good grab the bread. if one of you pulls harder than the other. it's unfair. go. if you ever gets the bigger piece is head of the household with the so 123, yes, movie, xenia. you must be gentle and loving. you're down more weight faithfully for your husband, or is it that make your home a sweet place to make sure your husband comes home? in? jerry and of course have children. many children with many men and women in russia share these traditional views. but reality tells a different story about 60 percent of marriages end in divorce, one of the highest rates in the world. the city of a van avo about 300 kilometers east of moscow is no exception. in fact, even of o is often called the city of brides. the majority of its residents are women. many are single mothers elena started her day at 4 30 in the morning. she shares the bathroom with the other tenants. she lives in this room with her 2 children, 5 year old, dasher and one year old facilities. time to wake up 3 shot. do not a tough one. a 3rd of russian families are headed by a single mother. neither do you want to provide him with this couch is where we sleep. i lay and eat you all. that's why i have to make the bed now, but it's just the ditch. dark, gosh, did you come on darcia put on your dresser. it ought to be handy wash. eleanor leaves home at 6 o'clock. she gets her daughter to preschool before going to work. it's a one hour walk through yvonne of o's, dim and deserted streets, and it was college. so then i could never have imagined this thing all alone with 2 children made me or not. i wanted to study and teach english. she, i passed my university entrance exams. then i met my daughter's father, god, it was a true love all, but he complained that i was spending too much time studying. he gave me an ultimatum, so i could choose him or the university. i chose him no rubric for long, thus, no problem. this decision changed to elena's life. her fiance left her soon after she became pregnant with her daughter. she never heard from him again. the 52nd partner never acknowledged vasily as his son. since then she's been on her own rid of like him to was mustache. can you much, tasha and i mean i have to go look on your smoke now. it's really hard. i also had to raise 3 kids on my own. oh man and oh good. they don't want to take care of their own kids to more nuclear, which must be this way. i think good. see les sasha, aka. it is 730 by the time alina arrives at work, she works in a daycare center where she can bring her some with her off the mothers at this day can are single parents. oh. 7 come on, your mom is going to work harder than when the counted the window and waved good bye with what do you do? oh, wait. oh shes not i. and $16000.00 roubles a month. you pay for day care. food and rent. yes. cuz i'm always afraid that my electricity will be cut off. all the children's fathers don't contribute. you know nothing, but i don't ask them either. when you brush, why? mister, when i told them i was pregnant, they said it was my problem. i hope you will be a 3rd of russian children grow up without their fathers. i'm going to eat you little that i'm the wolf. ah, after lunch, a group of single mothers gather in the daycare kitchen. mush. hello. how would the children with michelle katerina runs the daycare, unfaithful and absent men? often a topic of conversation here. what does it to the good, i've been raising my kids on my own for 4 years. when i got pregnant, he started going out all the time, drinking more and more fortune. everything went well when the little one was boring sour. but when my husband realized that he shared responsibility and had to pitch in that to be and he left go at 7 in the evening, alina finishes work, and picks up her daughter from preschool. mm. to night, she's visiting her recently divorced friend, lena. i. hello. the 2 young women have no illusions any more when it comes to relationships and romance. what nickerson and snuggle motion is. i mean we, i need a man for every day things just to come around with the tool box and fixed our fast coach. no. that would be nice if you those you but the but i don't believe in romantic love any more. yennie lewis the bushes, the brown little boy will sure he could go or she, it's better to be alone than in bad company. haunted snare boston, you didn't stay in london. we of course i'd like to find someone he'd give me gifts and help out with the kids and, but i have given up hopes and she's a young has no question. what about sex and romance? to say, no, i'm an amazon woman. these women in another have been let down by love. but the demographic imbalance that has played russia for the past 30 years is also to blame. there is a shortage of men, and that has an impact. many russian women have no choice but to look for love elsewhere. every year, thousands lee for europe or the united states. some moved to remote corners of russia, like the city of e, coots inside the area, about 5000 kilometers from moscow. not far from the chinese border. it's ethnically diverse. ah, aliya is a native of ear. coots, lead conducted by attorney 2 and a half hours by plain from the chinese border and 5 ounce from the capital convention. being so close to china helps us economically as i should, that that must be a blank. i them get, they put on for aliya life here has another benefit. she's found a reliable and faithful husband here. and here's the chance we g. o boyish, of that. you're more likely to find a husband in a border region with lots of migration was now not, we don't only have chinese here, but also koreans reacts and mongolians one wally. there are lots of mixed marriages here and then i'm years in salmon, but one of them she lives in this op scale neighbourhood with her husband and 3 children. june is of chinese origin. did you take your vitamins darling? yes. is no. take them aaliyah's, husband who runs an import export business, has given his family a comfortable life. they have a large attractive house, and each child has their own bedroom. aliya and june met 20 years ago at university in ear, coots. before the wedding. aliya had to win over her parents in russia. interracial couples are rare and often discriminated against her. racism has deep roots here lately. ah, ah one as her gesture is it okay if i talk about this vehicle is good year, my mother in law cut out an article from a newspaper only. like i said, there are many chinese who come here to marry russia because i asked you, but almost, even though they're already married back in china, those it was good. and then they go back to china. we did a either got an alternative m cookie of that that was to become will douglas mckesson. i do it for the russian citizenship or to get the documents that need to set up a business that the yeah bought for you. so i took out my passport to show them i was single go magazine hospital for my no, he didn't that. those are the main problem is that chinese men work a lot. yes. can you put it in the evening? they go to restaurants to do business not to eat. dish id love is that i she kept calling me, i'm why, but like in boy i told him come home, i need you. how come handled. but she would this, why are you hanging out at a restaurant on? this'll visit? we haven't. okay. i used to say what goes out of out of okay. yep. if you want me to be a russian man or them bring home $50000.00 roubles, and that's it. for the one you're going, but lisa michael should have ms. anna, but you know, she finally understood that i was there for business. not dinner of him. i got it all done with me, but um ah, since our marriage aaliyah's also become a business woman. she runs a chinese restaurant in the center of the a coast. he'll work a lot of media and just move the chairs back and it will be fine. you. yes, really. she manages some 20 russian and chinese employees. this is our head share. he makes traditional dishes from his province in northern china by them, but they didn't die. the restaurant is a 2nd home to their children and their russian nanny. her husband also has his business dinners here, a large family with a faithful husband who earns well in russia. it's the exception rather than the rule. see it yet? yes. every go dreams of meeting. have prince charming and i found mine. he's my train, the other the boy went. oh and she's my princess aliya and jones 4th baby is due soon. despite the prejudices of russian society, aaliyah found the man of her dreams. some other young russians of flouting conventions more directly. mm. on an overnight train from moscow to saint petersburg, a young couple wakes up after a night of passion. mm. ah, should i tie your hair back? hello, anne saul is a blogger, and belkora is a security guard. they've been together for a year. with you're still tired. mm hm. their family would not be complete without a 3rd person irina level, but she so tool and takes care of us like a mother by them. and so, and belkora a not a couple, but a troppo with they live a 3 way romantic relationship and described themselves as poly amorous, poly amorous relationships or a tiny minority in russia and around the world. and so lives in an apartment, in the heart of st. petersburg. no coins, joseph quotes you've got. oh yeah, i've lived here my whole life with the national cooking. the 100 square meter apartment has enough space for the 3 of them and saw shares this room with a rena. balco hasn't moved in yet. i wish her yes. blue passivity knew i sleep in the middle book of business sleeps against the wall and milk asleep on the edge of the can. our relationship is like a triangle where all connected to each other will could been us if i melt when they kiss, because it's so beautiful via both windows, but we make love in lots of different ways, thankfulness we're, we're, we're doesn't, can answer for july and you does anyone have yes, i have sex with this woman. they have me and i have them. another person lives here to very earth. yeah i i'm home though, diana finally i'm so happy to see. give me a hug of the mother did of law and souls. mother elena, is in her early sixty's. now. she knows about his poly amorous relationship with me . you guys never have imagined this in your life when i couldn't have imagined it either. when we see where an ordinary working class family may be, this is his way of rebelling this. when did you know my rebellious days are behind me? feel yells can't last forever. oh yes, it can back. you must not possible for 3 people to spend the whole lives together. new people can't manage it, but 3 can i live in you? you know, i didn't think so. i'm just waiting for it all to fall apart. but then you say, i told you so exactly. and soul belk i and irina don't shy away from public displays of affection. but homosexuality is frowned upon in russia. and assaults are commonplace in 2013 so called homosexual propaganda in front of miners became a punishable offense. what can i get you guys? money and fame just was it on dakota. we live how we like them and no one can stop us. we, it's our choice to make the go. could you notice for yeah, interesting. i'm not afraid of being attacked, which other people are afraid of me by as they organize monthly me tops to talk about polyamory. the owner of their favorite cafe has no problem with their lifestyle over them with the dish dish. i have no problem with polyamory in reference to just their choices, local musical, they know they belong to a tiny minority. he actually wish you, since it was at 87 percent of russians are pretty mainstream. young. wow. and vote for potentate benny glossy looking to know that russian society is still very conservative. but some of moscow's educated and privileged young people are fighting for more freedom and shattering old to boost like tanya. a manager of an event planning agency and krisha, a graphic designer than meeting their friends in a trendy bar to night. mom was never been here while they talk openly about sac square. i can give you my she didn't sleep it. oh yeah, a little thorough. 5 hours, then we had sex again that you know, you, you want, the soviet union may be long gone, but russia is still quite prudish. tanya and her friends are an exception. a few years ago tanya launched a new event with a agency. she began organizing what she calls kinky part is here in moscow. the moscow times has called it the start of his sexual revolution. a big kinky party is taking place in a few days, an event that created quite the bows among moscow's young, trendsetters. mm. the night before the big event grisham pays tanya. a visit. they've been together for a year. unlike most russian couples, they don't plan to move in together or get married. she's decided tanya, a business woman wants to remain independent, but them was so i'm, i'm not really and i deal russian women to this. i had a phase when i tried to cook traditional dishes like bush la. yup. and you, i said that i realized pretty quickly that wasn't for me. jen, how do you cope with not having an ideal traditional russian woman courtesy headed to the saw. it doesn't get better than these frozen dinners. 66 percent of russian women walk outside the home. so tanya is no exception. grisham, on the other hand is no ordinary russian man. my local this yeah. show bush. no, i'm not some macho guy. you. i was raised by strong women and studied in canada, where i became aware of issues like patriarchy, unlike most russian men, foster, ah young a, who with her father grisham called tanya, something special for the party to morrow. nicholas cook, i bought you something. it had for me, yes. the la di lash try it on. i don't have a white collar yet. she doesn't. the la good. no, no, yes. procedures, which oftentimes he eager. we live out of fantasy and give each other pleasure. now looked at the exquisite. unless he said so mother, she's shy, but she loves me very much. i love her very much to the leo which was in love with. ready it's tanya's big day. the monthly kinky party starts in just a few hours. but yeah, as the last piece give us the why are they sending me the list that the last minute? sure. i'll be between 750 and 800 people. that is the most people we've ever had at the kinky posse until x musk via woods. the pacific was good at us. the party will take place in a rented loft in moscow's business district. the program will include erotic, chose a dance floor and small private corners for couples with tickets costing the equivalent of 80 euros. this party is only for the wealthy. wow, i'm, i'm working with miss pamela. can we pull that to parts a little bit more? why shine it's all wrinkled in so i'd be afraid to hang on to that. are you sure is zekia? sure. it doesn't matter if the guest saw poly amorous, heterosexual or homosexual. the polity attracts young people from moscow and beyond . any one who is happy to flout to russia's strict traditions, come on. he is the s and m area with the latex beds. this is our hospital where you can play out, or your medical fetish fantasies. there with me. yes or so, and i'm not a lot of this is much better to me. you can chill on the balcony woods. this message i'm working with. okay, we're open the event is completely legal, but there are strict rules, no photos. and each new participant must be interviewed beforehand on skype. these security measures are designed to keep out extremists and prevent sexual blackmail . but this show is like a homage to love. it's great. these events help us liberate ourselves and feel good for you. but i wonder if they'll actually change anything in russian society. it's primarily the privilege to enjoy these evenings of freedom. elsewhere. many russian women a still bound by patriarchy, and often become victims of violence. ah, a russian proverb says that if your husband beats you, it's only because he loves you. many men have taken these words to heart mine. ah irina petra cova is the survivor ah, 50 bill vesh will stay here. tomorrow you have school. do you have a lot of homework lab? yeah. ah, well, i'm down in, if you oh, lou most in a blush, upgrades ya play. i'll tie up the dog seat. okay. the shed. i think the dog is here to protect is a ppo provider. oh, god forbid, something should happen to us in it, but she had big problems with my ex husband about quarter after we moved out he saw talk to a to use it. nor do i bought his dog when i realized that the police wouldn't help me. but it seemed, boy, i think i kissed him for years, irina's suffered violence at the hand of her husband, even the in front of her children. her son was 5 when she called it quits mit. i knew i still remember how we were going to leave a dial in my memory. i chose to fetch. he hit my mother. he wanted the keys to our new apartment. lotta and i were in our beds and heard everything now kind of matches. blue shirt does it say? oh irina and her children have already moved 4 times to escape a violent acts. to day they live in this 20 square meter apartment. this much much could he have mass i'm work. oh, i've seen you and russian women, no flames much quinn did math. everything seemed fine in 2000. and 6, irina and alexi had been together 3 years before they married. but when irina was 5 months pregnant, he beat her for the 1st time. after that had happened regularly, she endured the violence for 6 years. miss young don martin, look at the big bruised on my face. jack scott took darrell so old and bruised as on my neck near. i managed to escape to the neighbors just in time. i see a figure shop and then i called the police. the neighbors didn't want to get involved a promotional doctor's found lesions, bruises and a concussion. but even this evidence wasn't enough to convince the police irina filed a complaint 8 times to no avail. when her husband began beating the children, she decided to leave. she's been divorced since 2016. alexei was never brought to justice. said, flashing, oops, nations believe if he beats you, he loves you. shouldn't have chosen. she done that. the husband can just do whatever he wants to try. are women a worthless, but he was supposed to be subservient. jason boshamp, when she gets in russia, perpetrators like irina's, husband, are rally prosecuted. in 2017, the russian parliament passed a law de criminalizing domestic violence. only acts of violence resulting in hospitalization are considered a crime in vladimir putin ruling party only m p. oksana pushkin or opposed the new law. this is kizzy. nick, i'm with the glove. yes, it's a tragedy. it. the law allows men to beat their why by the him for discount. now all they have to do is pay a fine at me, which has taken out of their joint account as the vote agenda. women think a 100 times before their report. anything to the police asked by don't wish to leave. let the meaning is eva edge by leads. members of the orthodox church, often nautica for her views. what they keep is company hoarded, bus thought bus, flipping his harlem, and gets up to 150 letters like this each day. i'm a bush can lose came in here to pull that amount that i be removed from the committee. yep. we're glad with them. where you need it scares me to think way. we as a nation are heading. yeah. you had shown her asana. pushkin, a remains determined to fight discrimination against women in from moscow we had back to fire in the southern urals, victims of domestic violence throughout russia. visit this to to studio. they hope to heal the scars left by past relationships. hi, why should i go? you can sit here. today's client is a woman who survived brutal violence. what's your name? goodness. show me what would be the news of which was established eva did the surgical scar, could you say had to cut me open to clean out the inside? i didn't. i pledge a lot of my blood pressure dropped to 50 over 35. i was dying. oh did it was good and my husband if she doesn't live pasha will cover her scars with her to, to go. nass has chosen as 7 peddled rose as a symbol of renewal and hope which will. busy will hide the scars with petals? you can still see areas of scar tissue be right, well work with them as a j genie, towel, tina. and watch how easy me. the to to studio belongs to gina. she came up with his project to help survivors of domestic abuse. she has 300 photos of these women on her phone. they've all suffered similar fates. i would read the vicar would feel, he is beaca who was tied to a tree. xhylia nikolai became and that she was pregnant and someone told her husband that it wasn't his child. i even showed him on his elder. i'm going in the evening. he went with a friend and picked her up from work is added. they tied her to a tree and tortured her with the knife with trying to make her confess who the father was, especially a cheery bonacre's kazitis dame was a cruelly barbara covered up her scar with a beautiful butterfly. first at them, chris, your boots minutes. burbridge. the 2 session also serves as a kind of therapy girl nass talks about watch experienced, while her scars disappear beneath the ink. what happened, richard postilion. it happened after dinner, almost when my husband came back from work drunk as usual zone, he grabbed a knife and said on good his, i'm going to kill you. there's a when he stabbed me. i didn't even realize it. at 1st, i pulled the knife out myself, is alexia, so my, with the showman watches some way here. but the goal here is not only to help women process their experiences with, it's also to show them that not all men are monsters. you shoot them, you feel that you just a few hours later go nass can admire her new tattoo. sonia serrano more scars. it's the beginning of a new life for me. when i look in the mirror, i wouldn't have to think about the terrible things that happened with the blue a bye. thank you. from crockett. does this mean as long as pu tins, antiquated notions, that the model russian family and his demographic policies continue to receive popular support? women like coolness will have to fear for their safety. ah, ah. the plight of the refugees and cali, despite the freezing cold, thousands of migrants are waiting, hear their destination britain. many pay for the journey across the english channel with their lives. finally, france and england won't actually focus on europe 90 minutes on d w. what is art o, mark of civilization? a reflection of our society, a spiritual awakening. passion for an entire universe of culture. a new episode each week are 21 long d w. how long does it last or an eternity? time it can be measured precisely, and yet each person experiences it differently as if there are different forms of time time phenomenon, a dimension and the illusion about time starts december 31st on d, w ah ah, this is day w, news live from berlin. the number of cove at 910 cases in the u. k, reaches a record high passing 100000 in a single day for the 1st time bought new studies suggest army kron is less severe than delta. also coming.

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