write him just to write him a letter and that's it, you know? i know i could be facing more time, i know, it's very serious. >> minutes later, cruzado retracted his threat. >> i think i am talking out of anger. you know what i'm saying? talking out my anger. because, you know -- i get out, i don't think i'm going to react on the stuff that i wrote to -- >> ten minutes ago you told me you definitely were going to do it. >> but i don't think so. i mean, it -- i don't think so. >> coming up -- >> you can imagine officers and nursing seeing that for the first time, it's pretty bizarre. >> anthony cruzado carries out a horrifying act of violence on himself. and -- >> they say that dude threatened my young brother, and i got upset. one thing led to another, and