and i was in i.c.u. for 11 weeks waiting on a double transplants and october 24th, 1998, and i looked at my parents, my father went to the synagogue, to pray, and he came back up and it was 5:15 and i looked at my parents and i said i cannot take this anymore and i was on dialysis and i gave up hope because i wanted to live so much but nothing was happening and i was sicker and sicker and i could not breathe, and i could not fool my heart and that evening on the 24th of october they called and said i was transplanted and i went from knowing i was going to die to knowing i was going to live and my surgeon came in to the room and my cardiologist and prayed with me and we thanked my donor family in our prayers for what they were going through, probably a horrible time and