Its anby aamamezing event that brings office and all over the country to nashville each fall to be with the thousands of readers and writers and book levers from around the region. And writers and booklovers from around the region. For those of us who enjoy being here the second weekend of october every year we are lucky its a free event. Thank you to a lot of the community support. Remember that the festival does depend on individual donations among other sources to remain free. Please take the time to donate what you can to help keep it free and any amount helps. Whatever amount you can spare. You can donate via the website, the app, or in person at the headquarters, tenant, throughout the weekend. And any amount is appreciated. Let me introduce the authors, kendra allen, the author of when you learn the alphabet. And janine the author of my time among the whites. Those are the books they will be talking about today. Kendra, i think you said you wanted to go first. Yes. What we will do as each of the authors is going to read from their book a little bit and then we will have discussion back and forth. And talk about the books and about their writing and their lives if they want to. We will have an informal discussion. Kendra, let me introduce give you a little introduction. Kendra is the author of when you learn the alphabet. She was born and raised in dallas texas and currently an msa candidate at the university of alabama. Her work, which has been described as raw and witty, has been published in december magazine, the rumpus and revenue magazine where i read she says she wants her heart to tell the truth. Can you talk a little bit about the book before you read and then read . How yall doing today . Its basically an essay collection that discusses race and gender but also like family ties within intersections. And things like that. Im going to read from this book but as previously mentioned, and from dallas and if you know anybody from texas, they love to tell you how much they are from texas. So its like new yorkers, chicago and then like texas. So before i even get done youll probably hear him from dallas like 37 more times. Because im from dallas you probably heard about a [laughter] you probably heard about this botham jean case with amber guyger and i just wouldnt be from dallas invited talk about it. Im going to read a piece i wrote about that and then read a few smaller sections from when you learn alphabet. On september 6 2018 amber guyger and offduty Dallas Police officer was somehow so distracted by nothing that she killed a man. She was somehow so distracted by nothing that she couldnt tell the difference between her apartment floor let alone her apartment door. She was somehow so distracted by nothing that she didnt realize she was breaking and entering into botham jeans apartment. She was somehow so distracted by nothing that when she unlocked the door and pried open she couldnt even summon the common sense that none of the surroundings, the furniture, the design the layout belonged to her. She was somehow so distracted by nothing that her seeing a big black man in his own living room, eating a bowl of ice cream was the only catalyst needed in order for her to gain convenient laser focus. She pulled her weapon and before botham jeans ice creed could begin to melt shot him twice through the heart because she could. On october 1 2019 amber guyger said her distracted add in the courtroom and cried her white woman tears before, after enduring being found guilty of murder on october 2 she was sentenced to 10 years in prison. As someone who wants to see prisons abolished, i dont really care what happens to amber guyger at all. Even though i want to see prisons abolished, i need her to suffer for all the time she should have but didnt. For all the times white women have killed and sanctioned the killings of black men and lovers for those tears i got to keep bringing up those tears i must keep bringing up the tears forced as a safety net. The sympathy she knows it brings and the mastic ways we been conditioned to save her no matter who takes the fall in her place. How we got black folk internalizing her tears. Being remorseful to their oppressors of users and better ways time and time again. Just imagine botham jean running up in a white woman spot going talk to the door, let alone having the audacity to shoot 50 random awould also be dead just because they look like the person who couldve done it. Yet somehow would amber guyger accomplish has been deemed a mistake, a moment where she feared for her life after breaking into another mans home. Three days later on october 4, 2019 joshua brown, another black man across the hall witness whose testimony is probably the only reason amber was found guilty in the first place was shot twice at close range in another apartment complex where he died at parkland hospital. The story thats been created in the case of joshua brown demise is three random black dudes drove from alexandria louisiana to dallas to buy weed from brown and that his murder is just a drug deal gone bad. Im from dallas texas and buttered up real good, and i think better for it. Born and raised in dallas texas and im pretty sure i can guarantee that a no adriving across state lines for some weed they confine at a fourth stone. No matter the amount. But the story would be true if they couldnt lie to us about it. We got a gang problem and it aint got nothing to do with what hood you are from or what colors you bank. A gang problem is white the privacy we see its mission executed through academia, god and every time a police force that covers up and protects their own more than they would ever protect anybody who looked like me. A gang problem is a white supremacist system that builds itself on free labor and capitalist goals and calls it law. That changes the law depending on your proximity to its bottom line. So what im reading is in memory of those known and unknown, murdered by cops, all the black women and men across intersections trans nonbinary we all know innocence is something black folks will never be guilty of. What im reading is in premature memory of those who used to go next but most prevalent, what im reading is in the morning in memory of botham jean and joshua brown and the three black men would be charged with browns murders so no one else in the dpd has to. The three black men who can afford and a half abthey will still be charged with capital murder. And who will inevitably be sentenced to longer than 10 years. Whatever i read is for them because we all knew that fate but before we knew their face and we all know what its like to be a moving target. Please stop asking us what we mean when we say dont trust the police. [applause] thank you, and actually get a read from my book now. Im from dallas. Im going to read a poem and then an essay poem as well. This poem is called boy is a white racist work. When i was small my mom used to have been watching good times black boy, blueblack boy, bullet in your back black boy. Bullet in your head black boy. Arm around your neck black boy. School to prison pipe mom black boy. Fist in your face black boy. athe police black boy. Hoodies in your closet black boy. Always the blame black boy. Do rag with no waves black boy. Yall all the same black boy. Nameless black boy. Fat lipped black boy. Faceless black boy. Artificial thickskinned black boy. Brainless black boy. aone chance only black boy. Dead black boy. Too many colors on your body over your body, lets pray for the black boy. Fathering a little boy, black bald and gay boy. aboy. Corporate boy. Unemployed and locked up boy. Boys dont cry but i saw you boy. Crying, noose wrapped around your lips scared boy. Lasch b first black boy. Too scared to look afraid boy. You black boy. Not bad boy. You black boy, not bounty but bruised but you still got a name and bruised like every other aand bruised but mostly man. [applause] the last thing im going to read from when you learn the alphabet is called citizens take out the trash and its after Claudia Rankins citizen. If you have it read, ab when i think of hurricane katrina, spike lees when the levees broke comes to mind with the one sad man of many sad people whose mom died while waiting on a bus that never showed up. How america left her there to expire in real time. Her son instructed to push her body to the back of the line and cover it with a blanket like she was a piece of trash that needed to be taken out. Fifth grade year we gained the transfer students with access that sounded like jazz music. With dialects that felt like the bayou and boudin come migrating into our texas schools before and after the flood. And we didnt care what they came through but we knew where they came from. And we begged them to say baby whenever they spoke. We still thought it okay to remix young gz soul survivor to fit their reality to remind them of why they were here instead of home. You lo if you are looking for me, ill be on the block, no shoes,s, trying to make it to the bus stop if you are a writer, are a katrina survivor. If i can never distinguish the water is worse than a bulletingh especially inos this motion min the breeze without making noise and learning to live without being seen come with that used to be blue skies that are full of blue black faces, no stars we are not in f the country with aa darkness is welcome. Nono we are in the way a world where youl cant say goodbye, we dont know the exact time you areneve leaving. Heart trayvon, tamir, sandra, eric, craun, orlando, michael, dante, tanisha, walter, jordan, freddie, too many names to name. Christian, dear christian, you are 19 you lived up the street from my mamas house. You are too close to home. I didnt know you but i know you and i feel you holding on to me. Christian, you twee kristin, he used tweeted that he didnt want to die is it too young and i know they work lyrics to a song but did you meet jordan later on, he was younger than you. They say they tried to warn you and that yourn know ready. Me, you are taking me home going 90 in a 70, a cop car sauce. Big black suburban and chargers in iran past the wrong one. The live started flashing from both sides, i say what the blank is this. When did city cops get to do this. [laughter] both cops around the car on both sides with hands on the guns and tell you to stop out of the car. You say excuse me. Last night we had just heard about sander plan and you fit the description. I know you know scared, black girl going is it too fast and i know nothing elsek matters. U. S. What you have to get out of the car for speeding. Weor had asked to been hand over our ids. She has a heavy foot. Classmates audio. Your question where we were going. We were asked how do we been they had you out on the side of the texas road or confederatee flag hung from coarser doors we took our phones because we wouldnt let you die even if we let you die you wouldnt let you die. They give you a warning like you didnt already have one. Were we get to where we going, we still firm rights talk about a messed up we are and how we dont know how to fix it. Citizen said if the doors to open and im is it too curious to say sorry for what you just went through so we just laughed at everything i am sorry in memory of you i am sorry for what is next to happen to either of us taking out the trash, just to bring you back in tomorrow. Thank you. [applause]in thank you im looking forward to hearing a little bit more about your work. Next we will talk with janine and her book of essays is my time among whites knows from an edge in gated finish. One is the author of two books and is the writer for the New York Times. Make your home among strangers was a choice, choice book, the winner of the 2016 International Book award and was cited is a book mess with the year by abc latino, the guardian and the miami herald. His been adopted is now campus read over 25 american universities. Her short stories have been o. Henry prize, and other words. And she was raised in miami florida, shes an associate professor in the department of english and the institute for ethnic studies at the university of nebraska. So welcome and you talk a little bit about your book. Maybe we should have a discussion about this to occur w miami, specifically i am from violated [laughter] so thank you for bringing us some tear today i am for miami, about how the area code with me not of the time is three to five. The city of homes. So this is my essay question. Feminine a jeep finish education. This will keep a very deep desire to have serious and Difficult Conversations about race for the concept of race the concept of citizenship especially because of the 2016 election. I had a lot of friends a lot of my friends there were very shocked by the Election Results or the reported Election Results and i think i went on record in the New York Times of may of that year of being like trumpets by doing this can you talk to your families about what could happen in ourou families sign a part of where this came from was that i wanted to have a conversation with friends and learning longer ways. In some of these are based on new yorkth times anytime there d i would write these 6000 word pieces and then they would say, right give us a thousand words or 800 words and i would see like 1500 and do this than my editor would say thats not what i asked. So we Work Together toer get tht sort of idea and that i was here for readers and is always happy to hear from readers. They would ask us questions about the other 5000 words that didnt make it. We traffic so much in soundbites and snakes cant t be communicad that way. Peoples lives are at stake may have been for a long time. Some battery from a essay. Nothing is impossible in america. The second essay thehe book. He liked to read from the beginning of it for a little bit and then im really excited togi talk about with this with you this is from nothing is impossible in america. When non americans we meet, i learned my family is from cuba they often asked me was her question if i never been to cuba and the question is the layered and prosper me that i learned respond by asking why would i ever been to cuba and the just to see what they would say. Eyi almost relished their offerd answers on the assumptions they reveal. At this question a lot when i lived in minnesota. A place for monday of myy students write about their scandinavian heritage. And it never once occurred to me to ask within seconds of meeting them have they ever been to sweden. The second question less common though still veryes frothed, is even actually question. Thats weird and interesting and funny. Janine isnt a very cuban name. You are correct i say, its not. I also want to feel the uncomfortable pause that fall is. With the story that of the and more agreement is like this. Justin cuba means a teenager in florida, their names given to them by cuban parents who mistakenly assumed that they lived in cuba forever. These l names in their new home country,ly impact everything abt their lives. Their education, and thehe premature ends of the medication. The job process, what areas of the city in the front home they marry young, start aan family o, because they are lightskinned, they reason that theres a chance their americanborn offspring could avoid at least some of the elements of the systemic prejudice that they encounter despite having her work hard to learn english and almost eradicating their access, this is after not a story about the American Dream right. It means monday snakes will need to be unjustly eradicated. In this version of the American Dream, i think that not can change your destiny in this country. Picking the right name for your child. Theyre not totally wrong. Is john oliver on the show last week tonight, pointed out in his preelection effortwh to make donald drunk again. People tell the story about that then candidates grandfather staying he change the last families less name from drunk to trump we need immigrated from germany. Oliver asked viewers specifically those thinking of voting for men, to quote stop and take those moment to imagine how you would feel if you just made it guy made donald drunk. Hes only pointing out in a reality for americans. Reality couple in the story of blood for through. Is an opportunity to alter what theyd helped for the better. Because of the experience of living with their own names, my parents thought that giving the american child a distinctly ethnic name, it was unfair and quantifiable front cuts with this. Based on long before Research Studies that qualified for a job, and having weathered those consequences themselves, they felt an understandable reluctance to have the inherent them. This is how i came to be named after the 1980 ms. Miss usa runnerup. [laughter] his affect and write. This culture. My parents had a fist plan to name after the winter. And theyan had settled in to wah the pageant with that intention and even though i wouldve been born up until july july of 1981, the boys been the type to plan ahead. I was the first kid but firstborn America American in our family. A suitable american name was need it to confirm right the sleep from cuban to american. I happen to bee born female, wht better place to find a name they thought, then american beauty pageant. Bob parker, post back then, they mustve liked the way the name. Amanda mayday living pushing a giant wheel. Help determine the proper noun that would identify me the rest of myou live. [laughter]re i mention that long skinny microphone on top of that perfect blackball. No harsh consonance to progress is to hit, thinking. His pointy white teeth catching that last syllable like touching a cap until. Off of my parents, were rooting for her and ms. Miss arizona, didnt win. The winner of the 1980 ms. Miss usa pageant, the first bill is supposed to be named after. Shaun weatherly. At years ms. South carolina. I can almost hear my parents deciding there name that shaun was a boy his name despite evidence that to the contrary setting right in front ofde them wearing a crown, r [laughter] it was my namegh janine. That spelling, they thought. The spanishlanguage origins, at the better of them and they agreed that this spelling was not wrong. Valves in her name making little sense in the early i write up the j in reading and sounding like ee to them this change that to an actual ee, the e like in english. Loretta, this keep customizing. For an extra and before that for balance [laughter] lucier and what its not a sound doing anyway. Lets keep that last eve because in english people always put a silent e on the end. Je in and i and e. Donner his name, they had no idea that altering the spelling that they were on doing this spelling it might not work out well. Th is a marker of my parents immigrant status that might be looking for it. T. Sorry, people seen in writing the spelling always played for certain people, people looking for it, is a marker of my parents immigrant status. Alterations betraying the reason they went with that name in the first place. The first