Research there were about 56 of the largest developed nations having problems where they were falling behind all of the academic subjects but especially in reading and writing those are the two biggest critics of success so i started saying is there something bigger going on and what is the cause of this and why is it developed nations and i saw that they had enough mastery of survival to be able to allow permissions for families to have divorces and for women to raise children without much father involvement or any father involvement and so i started looking at those populations and found when they were divorced they did worse but those that have almost no father involvement or no father involvement were where it resides and went over to the single mother groups and found the same was true there and while there are about ten causes of the crisis, the single biggest they didnt reside. Crisis of education. Guest they are falling behind in all major subjects including reading and writing to a much greater degree. It isnt preparing boys for jobs and technology. Now the world has moved to microchip and mental and in japan 30 of the students go to the Vocational Education areas and 99. 6 of them get jobs after they graduate in the United States we have huge percentages who dont have any channeling into Vocational Education that has been cut back when it should be increased in its focus and so they are experiencing a lack of purpose also be the case where girls are Getting Better . Guest girls are Getting Better but in some cases, girls that do not have parents are not benefiting from the normal evolution. We are living in the era where a is extremelguy was extremely suf the feminist movement and encouragement of options for girls but now when girls and boys have become men and women and fatherin fathers and mothere children often times they say i have three choices and they say i have three options also option one is to raise money and option to is to raise money. So they often feel that if they dont work fulltime they will not be worthy of a father. And they want to be successful in their careers but they also want to have well raised children into an enormous percentage out there but only 49 of men who are very interested in taking care of children and even fulltime so they dont tend to be looking for men who dont want to raise children fulltime so we have a gap between women who want to focus on their career. Whose fathers drop out of the picture, those are the ones where there are real problems. Host should we be surprised they are attending the freedom fest conference . You should be surprised they are attending the conference and that said as one should be surprised when it came out. 95 of the interviews came from the enormous responsiveness. The conservatives and libertarians play an enormous focus on a little understanding the value of the families and fathers and this is unbelievable that this is where the democrats are completely missing out. They are much more valuable than i knew. I had never connected empathy with roughhousing with a greater propensity to the children to be assertive. I would never have realized the bond that is created allows holders to enforce boundaries without children being so resentful of having so much fun with that but they are willing to do what is suggested. If you stick your elbow in your sisters i, the children say okay, okay. Then they go back to the roughhousing and forget about it. It is under fire so they try to win by pushing their brother and sister aside i give a warning and now no roughhousing and then the next time a u. Cant win by pushing her brother and sister to have to consider their brother and sisters needs because that is an example of the difference in the parenting that needs to children having much more ability to focus doing what they need to do in order to get what they want. Host you talk in your book about 1972 being a watershed year in the womens movement. The National Organization and the other Board Members and i started to see the research that when there was a divorce and fathers were not involved that was a problem. A lot of our members want the option being able to be involved with the children or not and the dead equal right tday of equal r and mother and we had a lot of fish to fry. It is and the only fish we have to try so we cant afford to chalk our members in Different Directions and i say i understand that politically. I ran for the governor of california. I am not politically naive. I understand that politically but it is in the righ isnt theo do for our children. And that is a morally unjustifiable position. Host the crisis has become a political issue. Guest it has become a political issue. The good news is i went to iowa and interviewed democratic president ial candidate and when they were educated about this, there was a fair amount of receptivity because they are goinbigger goingaround the coung as a number of boys that are not doing well in almost all of those are bad deprived and a where that there is Mass Shootings but they were not aware that about 90 took place. Im hoping in educating but also working with the Trump White House and administration to try to create a white House Counsel to be on the public agenda in addition to girls and womens issues. It has become defunct and i have no problem with there being a White House Council of women and girls. I just have a problem with not boys and then especially when they are committing suicide at four times the rate of girls and women showing as destructive and selfdestructive behavior. Host how did you get into this line of work . Guest i was receiving my doctorate and teaching at rutgers university, and the service in 1969. I started talking about the movement as a political movement, and my student said you are so fire in your belly when you talk about this and so i was able to persuade my Dissertation Committee to allow me to change my dissertation topics so i ended up writing a book that was supportive of the movement and began to see that it is much more complex and one of the big discoveries was that the belief men occur a dollar for each 80 cents the planning for the same word. I found that that was totally not true. What is true is bad to earn more money than women, then mama, but women whove never have children or never been married, they actually helped earn name by 17 in comparison to men whove never have children and never been married so i started to think to myself this is interesting. And besides, if i knew i could hire a woman for 80 cents to do the same type of work that a man is doing for a dollar, i wouldnt be able to survive. I would never hire a man, and if i was biased an enough to hire a man, i would be, i would have the punishment of my bias would be that i have to pay an 20 more to do the same work. To quote from your book we often allow for the disproportionate percentage of young black men in prison may reflect our racism are rarely contemplated whether its the other half is black and is then that it ma but it may at or sexism. Like the 700 increase in the 93 population in the last halfcentury means the way we are raising our sons in the last halfcentury is leading to the deterioration in their mental health. When there isnt a lot of encouragement of those two have good role models like in the Elementary School years theres a lot of teachers and subways go from female only homes to female only schools and it doesnt take a great scientist or finge thinr cannot be perplexed. The reason we have a lack of concern is that historically come in order to be a real man you had to propose yourself to be disposable. To be a man you have to prepare yourself to be disposable in the war or disposable in the hazardous drugs at the workplace or to work 60 or 70 hours a week at the executive position and to die from what the japanese call. We call them this service of us would live. When you train people to die you cant be too emotionally attached to their health, so theyve historically developed heroic intelligence which is training for a short life as opposed to help intelligence which is training for a long life or as opposed to Emotional Intelligence training to be able to express your feelings interfere and other and talk about them in a healthy way to other people without whining to them and so this is what, this is a great opportunity for boys in the future. Those that dont have this sense of purpose when they have a purpose void combined so they dont have the father to guide them through the discipline to achieve a variety of purpose in their life and they become a failure to launch and they become ashamed of themselves and they become angry at people who are not paying attention to them and giving them praise like teachers or male female peers or the appearance. So that lack of purpose often times gets depressed and withdrawn into video games and becomes boy girl and they dont want to be rejected. It is access to a variety of attractive women without fear of rejection at a price they can afford. Theres more anthere is more any things with women so when they finally meet a woman that is may be interested in this the woman feels shes being treated like an object because she is being treated like an object. That is the background of the mass shooters or in a desperate way i will make people regret that they didnt worry about me, talk about me, care about me. Host you have shown this. Guest my wife accuses me of this is because im taking things that are different i want to be sure that they are not only making headlines, but ive done the research personally as to the case of the mass shooters but ive done the research very thoroughly. Host is that sense of purpose in our dna . Guest its a good question and the answer is yes. Here is why. For example, males know that women as a rule and i would say even male animals know. 85 of the reproduction happens by the females having sex and reproducing with the alpha male. So you have all these mails including human beings that are competing to attract the women to be sexual with and reproduce with. Buck el elks example the femals are almost always attracted to those that have the biggest whack. But the biggest con in order to get the biggest, the sense of purpose becomes getting the biggest rack, becoming the alpha male for the sense of purpose wanting to reproduce and attractive. He loses 32, 33 to get that city has to immediately after he reproduces get rid of that rack otherwise hes highly likely to die and he isnt able to replenish all of those nutrients before the winter comes. So that is the story of masculinity. One is our purpose to become the alpha male and mens weakness is our facade of strength. The big facade of strength, that rack is actually the weakness but its functional from achieving the purpose of creating the next generation. Host adhd can only increase . Guest definitely more guest definitely more recognized and probably more in males because what we do with boys as they started showing signs of fidgeting and so on and nowadays we probably say adhd but what we should be saying is they need more recess at school. Its not until recently the centers for Disease Control debate research into the effectiveness and take away from the child being able to study effectively or does it add to a child being able to study effectively, and they found that for each minute in recess, but actually was more functional for a child. This is true for both boys and girls, but its more true for boys. For the schools have responded for those that are fidgeting by doing less recess, doing less Vocational Education. Having fewer male teachers so that things they need in order to be able to move from fidgeting to being focused and motivated, the Vocational Education and its emphasis on boys doing thingways of doing tn just rehearsing things and learning, curiosity is very motivating. We have given them medication rather than a different type of education. They also find when children are raised predominantly by data, only 15 of children have adhd. When children are raised predominantly by mom, 30 have adhd. One of the reasons for that is that they are far more likely to be engaged in the boundary of the enforcement over for children. So daddy and mom set the daddy s boundaries the same way. Say you cant have ice cream until you finish your peas and they will test them in the same way and have as few pieces as possible. The difference is in the way that they tend to enforce the boundaries and bombs tend to feel okay i know you dont want your peas that have this anymore and she will separate half and then you can have your ice cream. So now the mom is able to be negotiated with. So then the child has half the number of peas and says okay i tried it, can i have my ice cream now and mom says i dont want to get into a fight over a few peas, this is ridiculous and dad says no, you cant. The deal is you cant have your ice cream until you finish. With thwhat the children are leg with their dad if they cant have what they want to have until they are focused their attention on doing what they need to do, which is finishing the peas are focusing on manipulating the deal. So they are more likely to have postponed gratification is the single biggest predictor of success but also the biggest predictor of success to rehearse for a play or Basketball Team or finish your homework without getting distracted. Its what prevents them from going into depression. When they dont have the success they tend to go down a slippery slope and in the worst Case Scenario move to depression, anger, withdrawal, alienation and Mass Shootings. You use the phrase failure to launch. Guest basically he has invited from the brightness to be able to launch but he doesnt have the postponed gratification to be able to do what his dream is. So, when a mom raises a child, she is often very encouraging of the boy or the girl to go after their dreams. When a boy or girl is encouraged to go after their dreams but doesnt have the discipline to do the play, to rehearse the music, he doesnt fulfill his dream and when the boy or girl doesnt fulfill their dreams and they become disappointed in themselves, ashamed of themselves after a while, they become afraid to dream. Host were you disappointed in your liberal colleagues at their reaction to the book and research . Guest ive been very disappointed in my colleagues and very disappointed that liberals who say i consider myself mostly liberal but not just at this point. Part of what i thought i was witwascaring and compassionate g to make sure people were included. I never wanted this to stand for. Im still in favor of freedom for women but the choice of the second they make the choice to have children, they have made a free choice for their childrens needs to be put forth. You dont have to do that in life now that you have birth control, but if you choose to do that, then you choose to give up the trac choice of making your personal freedom more important than your childrens hottie wife. Host you talk in your book also about the cost of the crisis. What is your estimate of . Guest about a trillion dollars per year to think about the Homeland Security cost to protect against isis. If you think about the cost of prison weve had an increase in the prison population in prison building. Everything about the Mass Shootings in activities that we are engaged in two and if we think about women that are not raised by fathers, they would be far more likely to be getting welfare payments as a result of not having jobs themselves and have children out of wedlock in their teenage years and our economy supporting them. So on and on like that with trillions of dollars over a period of years and about a trillion dollars per year that we spend by not paying attention to the crisis. The fellow that wrote men are from mars and women are from venus. How did you begin the collaboration . Guest we live in phil valley outside of san francisco. We started taking about 500 walks together and used to give her a great deal. It has the best of his ideas and hopefully the best of my ideas. Plus he has an absolute genius when it comes to nutrition in ththe yearsthe years diversifil chapters on how to prevent adhd and reverse it if your son does have it. You write boys and girls raised in families with fathers present have higher iq scores than those in families where fathers are absent. How do you know that . Guest kyle pruett has done studies on males and females that hav have that involvement y early on and from Yale University hes found hes looked at the groups that did it and have that involvement and it differs by the way. Its true not only in the early years putting premature birth. Boys and girls who have fathers tending to them when they are born prematurely are released from the hospital much more quickly and have better motor functioning and scores that are higher much more quickly. So, every single age i want to make it really clear this doesnt mean that they are not important. The children who do best have mother and father involvement. They have what i call checks and balanced parenting. Maybe in a couple of years you can climb the tree and he says that ten or her claim to tree it wilthe treeit will be good for. So mom and dad started negotiating saying they can climb the tree but never beyond this point where it has to be right under the tree in case they fall. By the way, give me that cell phone so you dont get distracted. That allows children to be able to make decisions about what the risks are that are appropriate and inappropriate without falling and killing themselves in the process. So, they get the best of both worlds they listen to each other, respect each others contribution, and when dad in order to have that have been coming in addition to listening to mom, dad also has to know the benefits are for roughhousing and climbing the tree. Children of climb that tree actually increase not just do your iq is the ability to do Risk Assessment and that is part of what leads to almost all entrepreneurs people whove learned how to assess risk and thats part of what allows them to be entrepreneurs. To protect our daughters so much and then expect them to be the future risktakers and entrepreneurs is an unrealistic and unjust expectation on our daughters. Host by the