Noah. Trevor so, election day is over, but because its 2020, election week has just begun. And that means its time for more election coverage in our continuing segment votegasm 2020 the awkward day after. Lets kick it off with really the only news right now. Joe biden looks like hes on president of the United States. At the time im saying this, he has leading in enough states to win the whole thing, and it may even be declared tonight. In fact, you might even know, watching this right now, if the election is over. And if you do, dont tell me no spoilers i like this feeling of stress. Now, this is all happening after a chaotic, nervewracking Election Night that featured all sorts of weird moments, predictions flipping left and right, ballots being delivered with a police escort, Steve Kornackis khaki butt. But maybe whats weirdest is that after all of that, the night actually ended up going mostly as everyone expected. Trump jumped ahead early in a lot of states because republicans mostly voted in person, and those votes got counted first. And then, as the democratic mailin ballots came in, biden jumped ahead, which is what everyone has known it would happen for weeks. Everyone except the president. We were winning everything, and all of a sudden, it was just called off. The results tonight have been phenomenal, and we are getting ready i mean, literally, we were just all set to get outside and just celebrate something that was so beautiful, so good. We had such a big night. You just take a look at all of these states that weve won tonight, and then you take a look at the kind of margins that weve won them by, we won states, and all of a sudden, i said, what happened to the election . Its off. And we have all of these announcers saying, what happened . And then say said, ooh. Trevor yeah, dude, because first they counted your votes, and now theyre counting the other guys votes. I mean, i knew that trump didnt like science, but i didnt realize he had disavowed numbers. I mean, maybe this explains why hes always in debt . This is just a level of stupidity from trump i did not expect. He exceeds levels of student. I didnt know you could go higher. Sometimes it really feels like trump is a toddler. as trump first, i had a nose, then suddenly, my uncle stole it, and i had no nose. What happened to law and order, folks . I dont have a nose anymore. Although, trump could just be playing fourdimensional chess here. Yeah, maybe hes laying the groundwork for his Legal Defense over his taxes. trump your honor, as you can see, i have no idea how numbers work. Therefore, i cannot be held accountable. Case dismissed judge you cant dismiss your own case. trump i also dont know how the law works. Double case dismissed winning. But, yeah, needless to say, trump was upset. The more votes got counted, the more biden pulled ahead of him. And for donald trump, there could only be one solution stop counting the votes. Something breaking in the last couple of minutes as well. Things are moving fast and furiously with the president s campaign. The campaign manager, bill stepien, announcing the Trump Campaign has filed a lawsuits in the state of mish saying president Trumps Campaign has not been provided with meaningful access to numerous counting locations to brvg the opening of ballots in the counting process, as guaranteed by michigan law, we have filed suit today in the Michigan Court of claims to halt counting. This is a fraud on the american public. This is an embarrassment to our country. We were getting ready to win this election. Frankly, we did win this election. applause this is a major fraud on our nation. We want the law to be used in a proper manner. So we will be going to the u. S. Supreme court. We want all voting to stop. We dont want them to find any ballots at 4 00 in the morning and add them to the list, okay . applause it is a very sad its a very sad moment. To me, this is a very sad moment. And we will win this. As far as i am concerned, we already have won it. applause trevor wow. I know everyone was expecting itux but still can we just tack a moment to admit, it is insane that an american president is just demanding that they stop they stop counting votes while hes ahead. This is such a textbook authoritarian move, which is impressive coming from a guy who has never read a textbook. I have to say for a guy who hates shit hole countries, trump likes to jack their style. I never thought of a day when somebody yelling at me to go back to africa sounded more like concern for my rights instead of a threat. Be careful, america. If you let trump do this, then voting could soon become one of those things people do to feel better, but doesnt actually do anything like taking c. B. D. Oil or recycling plastic. Now, look, nobody knows what the Supreme Court is going to decide if trump ends up bringing this case to them. We hope theyll be neutral and rule on the merits, but trump also the person who has appointed so many of them. That, who knows, they might be like, according to the constitution, only the president gets to be president. But lets move on to the the other big news of Election Night, which is very bad for democrats. It looks like republicans will very likely be holding on to the senate. And some highprofile races really did not turn out the way democrats wanted, even when they spent a lot of money. Reporter minutes after the polls closed in kentucky, Majority Leader Mitch Mcconnell winning reelection for a seventh term. Democrat amy mcgrath giving mcconnell a challenging fight, smashing fundraising records, her Campaign Spending more than 70 million on the race. In south carolina, republican Lindsey Graham holding on to his senate seat after harrison raised over 100 million in his campaign. Trevor goddamn, i dont know who the bigger losers here are the Democratic Candidates or the donors who gave them 170 million to lose their races. I mean, those donors gave them the best possible chance, and they still lost. Thats like your parents being billionaires, but you still end up as don junior. But, shit, if you can raise that much money, then next time, i am going to run for senate against Mitch Mcconnell all right, if im gonna beat this guy, im gonna need a tesla, the new ps5, and also 200 gs, for snacks and stuff. I think i got this people. And on one level, i guess its an encouraging story about the limits of money in politics, because it means you could have all the money in the world, but it cant buy you the charisma of a Mitch Mcconnell. So overall, even biden does manage to pull off a victory in the next few days or hours, democrats are still a bit shell shocked. They didnt do as well as they were hoping, and they didnt even do as well as they thought they would. Reporter trump did have a better night than expected, outperforming the polls once again. Reporter President Trump has actually exceeded his 2016 numbers in every single demographic with gender and race, except for white men. He exceeded his white women vote, blacks, hispanics, with black women and black men. Once again, the polls and the entire political world in washington, d. C. , and new york, totally missed the scale of the democrats underperformance last night. Reporter im going to pop over here to wisconsin. There was a poll from abc the other day that had joe biden up 17 points in this state. Look where you are right now. 71 of the vote, and trump has got a lead here by four points. Reporter the polling was wrong. It was wrong again, even worse than it was in 2016. Trevor the polling was even worse than in 2016 . How do the polls just keep getting worse . What are they, the New York Knicks . But thats right the democrats had superhigh expectations last night, and they badly underperformed. Basically, the democrats are the cinnabon of politics. It smells amazing, you get excited, but once youre eating it, youre like, oh, yeah, cinnabon. For more on what went down last night, lets turn to a man who was up all last night roy wood jr. Whats up, roy . Yo, man, whats up, man. Trevor, this race was tighter than donalld trumps undershirt. Trevor this race is tighter than one of Donald Trumps tshirts. Look at everything he did teamed up with coronavirus, killed people, got everybody to hate everybody, managed to pay less taxes and somehow still number this race. Thats crazy, dude. I wrote one bad check to circuit city and they still wont let me back in the store. And they had a business trevor whats the lesson here, man . Ill tell you what the lesson is for me. The lesson for me is to stop trusting the polls. Im done. Im done trusting these polls. You watch all the polls running their mouth about biden they had you thinking he was going to win florida, mexico, diamond and silk. Im done with all these polls. Its lies. Ill tell you right now, man, im never trusting polls again. Trevor roy, we talked about this in 2016. You said you werent going to trust the polls again then. Dont be bringing up all that old shit, man. Yes. But the pollsters said we could trust them again so i did. And they had four years to fix it. Silly me thinking they may have actually had some changes to the damn polling system. This is like i got a mexican spot i go to and they get shut down for health violations, but the food is good, so i let it slide. When you go back in, they shut down for a little while, and you go back in and you think they cleaned it up. Its the same old stuff, only now its a dude wearing a different apron. Trevor so youre not going to ever try and predict elections again, right . No, i will try to predict elections again, only now i will be using more reliable predictions, like astrology, or reading the entrails of a guinea pig. Or on the nightave full moon, going outside, yourinating and see if my pee makes words or letters, like a ouija board. Trevor you could try to talk to people of different communities and try to susout their perspective of the world. I said i said talk to astrologists. Thats what i said. Youre just not listening. Trevor so were on the same page, youre done with polls. Yes, im done phone ringing i got an update. Oh shit biden might win texas we back in it, baby biden might win texas, man. Trevor roy, i dont think ill check twitter real quick. Hang on a second. This is good news right here. Trevor roy, roy, those are pollsters again, roy, why not just wait for the result. Yeah, no, no, man i gotta put it up. I have to go, trevor. I have to spread the good news to everybody on the internet, man. Hey, we back in it, man. Trevor why is he phoning the internet. Thanks for that roy. No need to break his heart again today. Were going to take a quick break. When we come back well talk about all the Election Results that werent about the president. And spoiler alert if youre in jersey, its time to get high. You dont want to miss it. Do you want anything . No, im good babe. Can i get a quarter pounder with cheese . Make that two . Thank you. Aye but i thought you said. But you got two. Mmhm. Get it at mcdonalds when you buy one of your faves and get another for just a dollar. Get it at mcdonalds when you buy one of your faves i want to find a job where and i can be myself. I love indeed because you can look at the companys values. Now, im a Student Support specialist for an Ecommerce Company and they treat me like family. teen mom. It happened again. vo add some thrill to your wish list. At the season of audi sales event. Get excpetional offers now. Daily social distancing show. Look, people, its no secret that donald trump is a polarizing president. Some people love him. Most people hate him and thats just in his family. So its no surprise that with him on the ticket, people were not going to miss their chance to weigh in. To say this country is making history tonight might just be an understatement. When all the ballots are counted, more than 150 million americans will have voted, shattering all previous records. It looks like were on track to have the highest voter turnout, in terms of the percentage of the electorate, since the turn of the century not this century, last one, 1900. Trevor damn, the highest turnout since 1900 although, its a little different, because back in 1900, most of the electorate was horses. And not even female horses either only male horses who owned land. Very different time. Also, back then, people had more time to vote. I mean, they could just switch shifts with their kids. factory worker thanks for covering my ass, timmy. I owe you a pint of guinness. boy , but dad, im only seven years old. Right, straight whiskey then. Although, when you think about it, it makes sense turnout this year is close to 1900, because life actually is a lot like 1900 were home a lot, life is slowpaced, were baking our own bread. The only difference is we have netflix, and back then, they only had hulu. I cant wait to watch the handmaids episode today. Now, of course, the president ial race was the main thing bringing people to the polls, and after that, the senate and congressional races. But all across the country, people were also approaching voters on street corners and saying, yo, you wanna vote on a Ballot Initiative . Also on the ballot in five states, legalization of marijuana in four states, arizona, montana, south dakota, and new jersey all voting to allow Recreational Marijuana use, while mississippi voting to allow the use of medical marijuana. Voters in d. C. Passed a measure dropping magic mushrooms to quote the lowest level of Law Enforcement priority. And a first in the nation in oregon voters deciding there to decriminalize possession of small amounts of all drugs, including heroin, cocaine and meth. Those found in possession, will now have the option to pay a fine or go to a free recovery center. Trevor damn, you see . Oregon did it right theyre the only state with a backup plan in case biden loses. Honestly, though, i think this many people get locked up in america for way too long. Although, lets be real whoever proposed this bill definitely had a little heroin, cocaine, and meth on them. Personally, i dont want to get high in mississippi. Thats one of those states where you need your wits about you. But i am excite for new jersey to have weed. Imagine how nextlevel edibles are going to be when italianamericans are running dispensarys. Yeah, dis is an indica pepperoni calzone. I like it wit a side of og kush marinara sauce and if youre looking for some more good news out of the election, youre in luck, just check out some of the new people who are going to be reporting to work next year. Reporter last nights election marked a number of notable wins and firsts on both sides of the political aisle. So first, youve got Richie Torres and mondaire jones, both from new york, who will become the first openly gay black members of congress when they join the house in january. They will join nine other openly l. G. B. T. Q. Members of congress, then youve got sarah mcbride, who made history back in 2016 as the first openly transgender person to speak at a major party convention. She made history again as she was elected to the delaware state legislature, becoming the highest ranking trans lawmaker in the country. Mcbride celebrated last night by saying in a statement shes humbled by the support that shes received, and she hopes her win, shows an l. G. B. T. Q. Kid that our democracy is big enough for them, too. Trevor oh, yeah. We got transgender people. We got gay people of color. Americas legislatures are on their way from being mad men to becoming pose. And its so inspiring that after so many years, the l. G. B. T. Q. Community will finally have an opportunity to get their legislation blocked by Mitch Mcconnell. And having the two first openly gay black members of congress is amazing except for all the straight members who are always going to be trying to set them up together. So, you know who else is gay and black . Oh, and theres one more candidate whos breaking barriers this morning a republican candidate for the state legislature in north dakota, who died from covid19 in october, won his election tuesday night. Election results in north dakota showing the bismarckarea district going to david andahl and dave nehring. The district chooses two representatives. Andahl died due to complications from covid19 when he was 55 in october. Trevor oh, hell no. If you lose to a dead guy, kill yourself. It will at least make it a tight race. Seriously, can you imagine losing to a dead guy. Your campaign is literally you just saying, hey im alive and the voters are still like, yeah, well, i dont know. I dont know. We have to take quick break but when we come back we will be talking about the surprising high vot no, no oh my god, everyone is freaking out. [ screams ] freaky is such a blast. Its me, its millie oh my god so run to the theater. But dont forget your mask. How do killers do this . Oh sorry. 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