[laughter] look at those ridiculous things. Eww. Theyre all hard and oogy. What a stupid bitch. [laughter] captioning by captionmax www. Captionmax. Com on, everybody . Welcome to the daily distancing show. Im trevor noah. It is monday, august 24th, and heres your quarantine tip of the day if youre worried about riding in an elevator with other people, heres all you have to do just carry a mannequin around with you, and if somebody tries to get in the elevator with you, just put your arm around the mannequin and go, sorry, me and my lover need a little privacy. Anyway, tonight, we strap in for night one of the Republican National convention. We also look at thao how do you anonis taking over the g. O. P. And well be joined by the ever prolific tanehisi coates. Welcome to the daily distancing show. From trevors couch in new york city to your couch somewhere in the world, the daily distancing show presents the Republican National convention, celebrating februarys record. Trevor tonight was the start of the Republican National convention, a week of speeches, celebration and white people walking up to ben carson saying, wait, arent you the one that died . And if the d. N. C. Was all about the people, the r. N. C. Seems to be about one person, donald juiciness trump. The stage is set an republicans will have their chance to make their pitch to the americans and President Trump is expected to make an appearance every night this week. You can expect a lot of President Trump as you mentioned and a lot of people who have the same last name as him. Someone with the same last name as trump speaking on every single night of the convention, including the president who will appear in some form or fashion in the 10 00 p. M. Hour every night to have the convention. Slated to appear all his children except youngest son barron. A couple producers of the apprentice are part of putting this production to as well, so maybe a little added tv value. Trevor this is so exciting the producers of the apprentice are working on the r. N. C. . So does this mean trumps planning on firing people . Because he doesnt have any staff left to fire, his whole team is mike pence, Steve Mnuchin and 30 jared clones. If were lucky, maybe the week will end with trump firing one of his kids. Im sorry, eric, but youre fired. But dad, woin the challenge the real challenge is me having to see your face. Fired. Trump making a speech every single night might seem unusual in term of conventional traditions, but makes sense, the Democratic Party had to give everyone a speaking slot because theyre trying to trying to apiece a lot of different groups. Blacks, latinos, disaffected republicans, fans of abc shows. The Republican Party only care about appeasing trump because its his party and if you dont like it, you can shut the ~bleep up and join john kasich in that field. One to have the highlights of the Democratic National convention was the roll call of all the delegates who announced their votes from beautiful locations around the country. This morning the republicans had their roll call and it was beautiful in a different kind of way. Today as a prowrd and independent nutmegger, i proudly cast 28 spicey votes for president donald j. Trump. We put forth commonsense policies to help everyday Rhode Islanders who love coffee, milk and dough boys dip their clam cakes in comowder and, yes, we eat a lot of cal ma calamari, rhode island style. Maryland is home of the underground railroad and two of our greatest about legsists. I come from the great state of montana. Its often been called the big sky country, the Treasure State and the last best place. But currently, we are affectionately calling it trumptana. We fish, we hunt, we boat and we have at least five guns in every home. Trevor honestly, if you need at least five ghuns your home, its probably because you misplace things a lot. You dont need to buy extra guns, you really just need to buy a notebook to write down where you left your gun and start journaling because your ass is crazy. Either way, the r. N. C. Roll call is depressing. The d. N. C. At least had a ninja chef posing on the beautiful beach. The most interesting person here looks like hes getting his mug shot taken after being arrested for sweating too much. Also, why is the camera so close to their faces, huh . Thats how you zoom in to a work meeting when you dont want people to know youre still in bed. Yeah, guys, i looked through the proposal and everything seems good. As you heard, practically every member of trumps family will be giving a speech this week but one person not speaking the trumps older sister maryanne, a retired federal judge. She almost never says anything publicly about her brother at all. Now were learning what shes been keeping to herself. President trumps sister Maryanne Trump Barry blasting him in secret recordings revealed the the washington post. He has no principles, none, none. The leaked conversation between the president s sister and their niece were secretly recorded who says she taped talks between 2018 and 2019, the retired federal judge labeling her brother cruel and phony. Hes a lier. Oh, my god you know, the change of stories, the lack of preparation, the lying, holy ~bleep . Trevor no, man, come on, are we living in the twelfth season of a soap opera . Where in real life was a sister come out of nowhere to start a feud with the main character . Who is she . Where did she come from. I hate my brother. You know thing are bad for trump when he has a hard time wrangling the trump vote. Hard to win the swing states when youre polling poorly with people youre sharing parents with. I have to say, this made me a fan of trumps sister, not because she dislikes her brother, buzz because shes 83 years old and she apparently loves cussing. I just want to go out to dinner with her. Ill have the ~bleep soup and, hey, if i got wings, would you assholes help beat the shit out of them . Okay. Well have some of those ~bleep wings. Now, as he goes into the convention week, trump finds himself down big in the polls to joe biden, in large part because of his handling of the coronavirus. It has been an absolute disaster. So now, trump is trying to change that perception with some fresh blood. President trump has announce and emergency authorization for a coronavirus treatment that his Administration Hails as a major advance. President trump making that dramatic announcement late sunday that the f. D. A. Has authorized the use of convalescent plasma for emergencies. But now some democrats are demanding answers asking if the f. D. A. Is being pressured by a president locked in a tough reelection battle. The decision for emergency use comes after internal debate at the the f. D. A. Over whether the agency had enough data to authorize such a move. It also comes a day after the president , without any evidence, accused the f. D. A. Of impeding Clinical Trials for political reasons, tweeting saturday the deep stateover or whoever over at the f. D. A. Is making it very difficult for Drug Companies to get people in order to test the vaccines and therapeutics. Trevor goddam, trump hasnt bullied in other words this hard since he forced one to take his s. A. T. For him. We all want ature for covid, but mu medicines shouldnt be rushed out like new taco bell items. Of course trump has a problem with the f. D. A. Theyre the same ones that told him how many calories were in his burgers. If these are 800 calories apiece, how can i eat ten of them . Lets try to be positive, if theyre not proved safe and corrective, maybe theyll work on coronavirus and it will be gone. Well just have to wear masks to hide our mutant face. When we come back, why q anon when we come back, why q anon is th wanna show you places in my mind wanna show you places in my mind uh, wewe be living for this im ready for this wanna show you places in my mind inside my mind wanna show you places in my mind inside my mind any order of ten dollars or more by using promo code save20. Thats 20 off any combination of sandwiches, drinks and sides you can imagine. Combos. For days. Just use save20 online or on our app. Im a delivery Operations Manager in san diego, california. We were one of the first stations to pilot a fleet of electric vehicles. Were striving to deliver a package with zero emissions into the air. I feel really proud of the impact that has on the environment. We have two daughters and i want to do everything i can to protect the environment so hopefully they can have a great future. Iredefined the wordng thschool this year. I can to protect the environment its why, at xfinity, were committed to helping kids keep learning through the summer. And help College Students studying at home stay connected through our university program. Were providing affordable Internet Access to low income families through our internet essentials program. And this summer, xfinity is creating a Virtual Summer camp for kids at home all on xfinity x1. Were committed to helping all families stay connected. Learn more at xfinity. Com education. Well then chill your reeses, dessyoull eat it slower. Ast . I wouldnt know i swallow mine whole like a duck. Not sorry. Reeses. The fighting spirit is one we for eduardo perez, it drove him to thrive in his search for a better life. Immigrating from guatemala at 18, he found work as a dishwasher. A line cook, sous chef, and eventually. Fought to the top of one of the most challenging professions in the world. Proving that there is no challenge that can hold back a fighting spirit. Since 1925, weve proved that it doesnt matter where you come from, it matters what youre made of. Modelo. Brewed for those with a fighting spirit. Trevor welcome back to the daily distancing show. For the last few weeks, you might have been hearing about something called q anon, the biggest thing on the internet since that time Kim Kardashians butt was thirsty. It has been all over the news, social media and, this weekend, q anon supporters even held demonstrations in cities across america. But what is q anon . Well, lets find out in another installment of our ongoing seg if you dont know now, you know. If you know anything about q anon, youve probably heard its a Conspiracy Theory. Truth is, its more like a political cult built around a Conspiracy Theory and crossed with a big book of word search muse also. If that sounds complicated, wait till you hear what they believe in. For believers, q is an anonymous Government Official who possessions classified information about a covert battle between the president and a malicious ring of celebrities, political elite and the socalled deep state. This anonymous poster q was giving secret clues about becoming great awakening. The central theme is that Hillary Clinton and many of the worlds other politicians and celebrities are members of a murderous child sex ring. Hillary clinton, oprah winfrey, tom hanks and others eat children in order to extract a life extending chemical from their blood group. They believe that a group of military generals recruited President Trump to break up this conspiracy and end their roll control to have the government in the media. President trump and q anon is going to save us in a moment called the storm. His tweets are misspelled for a reason. When he does smocking gun, its all code for what hes telling us. Trevor okay, i want whatever these people are smocking because trumps typos are a secret message . Man, i wish people were this forgiving when i did stupid shit. No, you guys dont get it when trevor threw up at that party, he was showing us its whats on the inside that counts. But look, youve got it wrong. President trumps tweets are misspelled for a reason, and that reason is he cant read. Now, look, if hillary and oprah were eating children to live longer, i would be horrified, because that is such a waste of magic blood. You feed those kids to ruth bader ginsburg, people, priorities there is no way this Conspiracy Theory is true. I believe a lot of crazy zit. I believe the t. S. A. Con phi cates our lotion to sell it back to us. I believe no one has broken up with they, they have been aqueducted by aliens. But this Conspiracy Theory is crazy even for conspiracy theories. Set. Side everything else, youre telling me trump is going something heroic but instead of taking credit of it hes keeping it a secret . That is the most unbelievable thing i have ever heard. Plus if youre wondering how its possible trump can be leading the fight against the pedophile ring when he was friends with Jeffrey Epstein for years, according to q, trump has been undercover since the 90s. Which i believe, i mean, if theres one thing trump is known for, its his famously long attention span. So how did this insane theory take off . Well, partly it latched on the fears about the real phenomenon of human trafficking. Partly it set off on comment antisemitic tropes about leaches who drank the blood of children, but mostly the good old internet. Q anon emerged after trump took office, starting on fringe internet Message Boards before spreading the social media. This pandemic only made things worse, these people are just there all day. Facebook groups have grown exponentially with q anon. In just four months, membership to have the biggest public q anon groups rose by 700 . We saw a lot of groups who are wellness community, people interested in alternative health. The algorithm would sort these people together with the q anon people. They would say alternative health, maybe antivax, maybe into donald trump. And within one or two clicks, people would go down these very bad paths. Trevor yep, that is how this shit always goes on to the internet. Feels like the interpurpose of facebook is to funnel everyone toward the craziest conspiracy theories possible because people will join a group about cycling and five hours later theyre like Hillary Clinton is a mountain goat, people, shes an actual goat. Its not surprising the pandemic turned out the greatest conditions for people to get radicalized. Some people joined q anon, some ordered pel atons, and neither will shut up about it. It shows you how much the internet is ruining our brains. When shakespeare was quarantined during the play he was, like, maybe i should write king lear. Now people are sitting around in coronavirus saying i wonder if i could prove tom hanks has sex with the devil. From the swampiest parts to have the internet, q anon picked up followers and grew into an online movement. Seems many of the things it predicted never came true. Early on they were claiming Robert Mueller was investigating and indicting leaders, and President Trump was working with murals team. President trump is creating a secret team to arrest them and force them to wear ankle bracelets. The belief is the late j. F. Cments, jr. Is alive and helping trump clean up the deep state. Nearly all of these clues including Hillary Clinton was arrested turned out to be wrong, but the batting average doesnt seem to matter. You can present them with evidence, you can common strait how theyve gone wrong and they dont seem to care. Again and again that q is bigger than anything that they can have to the contrary. Trevor thats right, doesnt matter how many of qs outlandish predictions fail to pan out, it never seems to have an impact on the movement, and that my friends is the classic sign of cult behavior. Once youre invested enough in something, you will make any excuse for its failure. Please, dont look for logic. Thats not how cults work. Wults dont follow logic. They follow whatever the cult tells them. Thats why you always see cult leaders go so quickly from the sacred aliens have chosen us to weird news, guys, the sacred aliens tell us i should bang all your wives. I guess it must be for our redemption to go somewhere. I pick her. Thanks to this relirnlings fervor. Q anon took over the internet. It would have been fairly harmless if it had just stayed on the internet like momo. That thing was a joke. That was weird. But the scary thing about q anon is what happened when it jumped from the screen to the streets. This is not just a bunch of online crazy talk. Its dangerous in real life. The f. B. I. Says q anon and their many conspiracy these are are a potential domestic terrorism threat. The North Carolina han who shot up this d. C. Pizza restaurant looking for nonexistence pedophiles believed in similar these are. On more than one occasion members of q anon showed up in webs in some place the character told them were connected with conspiracy theories. A man drove an armed vehicle to hoofer doom on what he said was a mission from q anon. Q anon have been involved in foiled plot foiled in july a julyyearold man was charged in the shooting death of a recruited mob boss. His attorneys say he was motivated by q anon. Written on his hand were q anon symbols. Trevor you cannot be serious. Can you imagine being a mob boss and get what could by a whacked by a kid from a message board . You would want them to lie in your obituary and say you were a snitch. Q anones are doing real things, shootings, hijacking, kidnappings. Of all the bad advice on the internet, nothing came close to making me a murderous mob boss. The worst advice i got was use toothpaste to get rid of pimples. Even with sporadic reeled world violence it might be tempting to dismiss q anon as another lune attic fringe but its becoming pretty close to mainstream. In fact, there were roughly 50q supporters who ran for office in the Republican Party this year, and its almost certain that one of them is actually going to be in Congress Next year. Although maybe thats a good thing. Nothing will bring vent them from getting anything done better