Hello, this is a psychic podcast, and we continue to analyze the most difficult situations and look for solutions where it would seem that they may no longer exist. Each of us has probably experienced this unpleasant feeling of wasted time on social networks. Our heroine today came to us with exactly this request marina is suffering. From addiction to social networks, practicing clinical psychologist olga savkin will try to understand marinas situation and i hope to give recommendations that will be useful to each of us. So, have you discovered that you are addicted . The thing is that i noticed that i wake up, immediately pick up the phone, fall asleep with the phone, and for a long time i didnt even think about the fact that this was somehow wrong, that this was something wrong. Im not sure now that i can say clearly, im sure, i still cant diagnose myself, i cant call it an addiction, this should be done by a specially trained person, but i can clearly say that phones, namely social networks have become interfere with my daily life, lets try to figure out how this happens, can you describe to us your typical day . I wake up, pick up my phone, go to social networks. I scroll through the feed and videos just to quickly, somehow, quickly, i dont know why, it just happens that im like this, i need to wash my face, well now, and i go downstairs, sit on the sofa and im like, well now, another 5 minutes, and again you take out your phone, that is, yes, i continue, i think, now a little more, i washed my face, i sit down again like this, now i still want to sleep, and it seems to you that youre a little bit relaxed when you scroll through the feed. And the moment is such that of course, when i go to the shower, i dont scroll through the feed, thank god, but its imperative that i have music playing or some kind of podcast going on, in general, in silence, its very difficult for me to stay , that is, as if you are enveloping yourself with this kind of information , yes, yes, that is, it turns out that if i dont receive information, then i dont know, i start to feel some kind of anxiety, that im either something now i wont have time in this life. Either ill miss something very important, or just what else should i do . Hows work . From there it all really started, at first there were small projects, small problems, yes, that is, and you seem to live with all this, not noticing that you have a cat there, dirty dishes, perhaps, that is , you there and from there gradually, the larger the projects became, the greater this same dependence became. Olga, well, it s a familiar story, from a point of view. Demonstrated this pleasure, what is the suffering, in fact, im talking about this, by the way, i thought about whether i was really suffering, and as if, well, in fact, no, its really pleasure, joy, and so on, but when i understand that this is interfering, that is, i can be more productive, i can get high in a different way, to enjoy life in some other ways, can you, i really can, but for some reason thinking that damn, i took a photo there and filmed it, thats cool, now i wish i could edit it like this, like this, and it will accumulate so much of everything, that is, its always like this red line in my life is present, but i understand that the buzz from some deeper things than just all these clickable things, it lasts longer, and it really somehow, well, i dont know, you can feel it, but its easiest and fastest, for me, if im stressed or there, well, i dont know until. Somehow ill be out of trends, i wont recognize, i wont grasp it, but if we assume that everything remains as it is, we came to the show today , you had a great time, you received some new joyful hormonal reinforcement, i posted a lot of stories from here at once, naturally, of course, well, thats it, all the needs have been closed, in our modern times, and nothing happens anymore, and what will happen then if you dont solve this problem . What will happen to life next . Most likely, it will just be very monotonous, always, that is, i in general, if you remember, well, the past week, the past two or three weeks, morning evening definitely always starts and ends the same, in fact, thats exactly the monotony and exactly this the moment that you are wasting your life, it is very scary, it turns out, that it always seems to us that without. Endless, we probably dont think about the fact that this could happen, well, that it was given to us for a limited time, and well, beyond that, just to regret it later about the fact that you didnt do something or couldnt remove some, well, some seemingly nonsense, but which takes up a huge amount of your daily life, takes up a huge amount of time, well, you dont want to just sit and watch it later and think, lord, can i ask you, marina, now, when you are making your speech, could you you assign to yourself what you are talking about, this means i position, that is, i am missing something not from the position you, yes, as we are used to, generally accepted, yes, forms of speech, through you, right when i begins, maybe maybe it will become a little different, lets explain to our viewers why this is important, and to marina too, why it is necessary to speak, translate this reflection, speak directly with your mouth, yeah. This is me, i position always helps us take ownership of our lives, actually, because if we speak in the third person, or we talk about someone, this is something disconnection from ourselves, which naturally does not cause us an emotional reaction that gives us the very decision that we need to make or that very insight, and that is , its as if its not about me, im detached from someone, maybe even as an intelligent, wellmannered person, i sympathize and empathize, but this is not with me. Here is probably a short version of the answer to the question what will happen to your life if everything remains the same, only from my position, i will screw it up, firstly, mediocrely, yes, everything will pass by, and absolutely, well, really in fact i i will feel 100 unhappy, and 100 i will think that damn, why, well, just sometimes, well, somehow, if you remember, there were literally events there for 3 years. In a row you spent on something, i spent, i spent on something, now im sitting here, thinking, why and i dont want to, well, there are social networks, if i understand that im in about the same story , like 3 years ago, why do i need this, if in the end i dont know how long, but ill look back and say, well, how could it be, when the weather is so beautiful until 2 oclock in the afternoon on a weekend. My own realization actually, how is it, its happening right now from morning to evening, realization, i wake up in the morning, pick up the phone and think, i need something not about. But at the same time im afraid of the same thing at the end of my life, i heard correctly, perhaps, but there is a nuance when, well, this is my profession, yes, that is, i communicate with people and promote something through social networks for them, that is, either there are businesses or personal brands and so on, when i do this for them, i well, im fully invested, with great pleasure, tracking for. Just all those trends that im so afraid of missing, but there is a moment that i have such a desire to do this with myself, and my own, just to implement myself through these very social networks and the manifestation of some kind through them, but myself every time i want something, so i take it and say thats it, from today i wont just scroll the feed, ill work on creating content, that is, i give it, not consume it. As soon as i tell myself this, everything happens to me, oh, my god hurts a little, now well look through it, it will pass, oh, im still there, that is, it s like, i dont know how to explain it, in fact, but i, as soon as i need to make exactly the decision that i want, its really very strong, but some kind of stupor occurs that i turn here, like, well, now, time flies by very quickly, that is, i dont even i notice that an hour and a half to two hours can pass there, lets. Ask olga about that. From a physiological point of view or neurophysiology, what is happening with marina, and with each of us, who are stuck on the series on small videos, on some tape, because it feels like we are not completely in control of this situation, well, we control it, perhaps, consciously, as if some deep biochemical processes command us at this moment. Thanks for the question, thats basically it. Contains the answer . And of course, this is a very beautiful, tasty story with defamine, defamine is a neurotransmitter and a hormone that, in fact, helps us feel pleasure and helps us achieve the next neurotransmitter is the hormone sertonin, the hormone of joy. Defamine was once evolutionarily given to us so that we could focus, gather our body, show some kind of reaction and get ourselves. Well, at least food or water, and have fun, remember, when you are thirsty, when you are you drinking, what are you, what are you doing at this moment, yes, oh, how good, this is how good, this is exactly, in fact, dopamine addiction, because, uhhuh, we count very quickly, if we talk about physiology, due to bright pictures, due to some kind of quick change. Naturally, when we receive positive reinforcement, we need even more more more, because its called tolerance, when we get a certain set of good satisfaction for ourselves, we are already bored, we need more, we need it like any other addiction, absolutely , yes, that is, this is a behavioral addiction, by the way, it already exists now the name for the fear of being left without a phone is called nomophobia, its a pity that this is not yet in the classification of diseases, and we cannot yet that we should officially begin to treat this, but i assume that our forecasts in this sense are quite positive, soon we will have something to do. This is a psyche podcast, and today psychologist olga savkin and i are helping to understand the problem of addiction to social networks. Look what this all reminds me of. This reminds me of an eating disorder, well, tell me, it looks like yes, thats how you cant, i know from myself, but like many girls, yes, especially during periods of some stress, anxiety, of course, i start to bite, overeat and not stick to any regimen, yes, and you get something when you go to the refrigerator, hop, and theres something tasty and you get this shortterm injection of joy, youre kind of consoled, yes, you comforted yourself with this a forbidden piece. Its interesting that the more you think about the fact that i should lead a healthy lifestyle, i shouldnt bite, i shouldnt eat what i shouldnt eat, the sweeter the pleasure you get from the braided fruit. It turns out that its the same here, no matter how much marina is with her she said that her life was passing by, that half a day had flown by instead of a park or an exhibition, all the same, this shameful pleasure does not just disappear, probably gives more and more of that same dopamine release, which only, of course, tells us about in fact, quite often this is compulsive behavior, its some kind of obsessive idea. Do something, for example, eat a delicious meal, yes, or get on social networks, but when it comes to eating behavior, i have some real fear, i will stand up, lets say, of a certain size, i wont be able to wear some beautiful things anymore, and so on, i might get diabetic, for example, there you can very well, logically unwind from our examples, which we clearly see, that is, you mean that a person. To be presented in a modern way, to be recognized, to see love, this is what everyone is looking for, alcoholics, people who suffer from chemical addiction, these are actually all behavioral addictions, we are going where it was once lacking, and now i am. Im trying to compensate somehow in a very quick, convenient way, and this will be the illusion of recognition, what im concerned about. Is precisely my own manifestation in society, but i have some of my own goals, ambitions, and this has been the case since childhood, when likes, comments and Everything Else were not in my memory yet, now that i understand why i need to do certain actions specifically for myself, and not for the client, i just lack regularity, consistency, constancy, in general, the point is how to delimit the moment, i m confused about where this lack is love, and where we look. Only with likes, and where exactly is the moment of this realization of how you see it and how you want to see yourself there conditionally after some years, is this also connected with some kind of dislike , or maybe there is some kind of practicality and you want this ambition, but there is still something with likes, i just dont know how to explain it, depending on what ambition is built on, what we ultimately want to achieve , here he is looking for this recognition, the applause of the stage, yes, someone is just filling the void, someone is proud of something, but maybe there are some universal tips, we will try to come up with some kind of quick selfhelp formula for a person who, like our heroine, realized that something is going wrong, yes , something is too, too attached to this pastime, uhhuh, what could it be . Any addiction is an altered consciousness, this means that i am not in this moment, not in reality, and i have left reality, and the first, most basic technique is to return to awareness, this means asking yourself the question, what am i doing right now, what am i doing, uhhuh, im not doing the dishes again, nanananana, this is what we are used to telling ourselves in terms of not, what am i not doing , and what am i doing. At this moment, im looking at social networks, uhhuh, what am i doing, what am i doing, and this question can be repeated so many times when we dont come to a final understanding of what im doing now, this is a very interesting chain, in fact, it turns out very deep, so in the end at the end, when we got this answer, you can ask yourself a question right now am i wasting my life or not, yeah, yes, that is, but she should want to ask herself this question already at this moment, when she is absorbed, for example, in short videos, of course, naturally, like how to do this, is to write myself, i dont know, a piece of paper so that i wake up in the morning . You saw it, of course, in fact, if we knew now the final target picture, where i really want to go , well, or not i want to come, but marin, you want to come, yes, it would be easier to build the route, of course, as a gps point, which we set as the final point, or we get into a taxi, we say, please take me to such and such an address, if we dont tell the taxi driver the address, he will drive us around in circles, earning money from us , yeah, in the end we. Well just lose a lot of time, we wont get to the final point, because we didnt name it, so if we know exactly our gps point, we can build a route there, how far is this point there should be, this point should be today, today, in total, for example, i look at social networks not for work, there is no more than an hour, or this is some point in 10 years, but after 10 years i am so successful there and so on, i overcame my addiction a long time ago , thats it. I propose to go back, that is, to put a global point, yes, the most, the most important, everything that i want to get in that day, take it directly for your ideal, you mean, your ideal, yes, your ideal day, which i i want to get there, say, in 50 years, go back, go back, and what do i want to get 10 years ago, and 10 years ago, and 10 more, so five times, yeah, what. I want, where i want to be, at what route, intermediate point i i want to stand, then, for example, we took 50 years, yes, we built it several decades ago, then for every 10 years we build even smaller steps, yes, that is, for each year, what i want to achieve here , what do i want to come to here, and then we get to the day, and what do i want to come to. To do at this point today, and what do i i want, i want to wake up in the morning and be without a phone for exactly 60 minutes, yeah, and if without a phone, then its like, what do i want to be with then or with whom . Now, in fact, i have the answer, because i once practiced these morning rituals, i found it very. Great pleasure and resources, and i really left the house with the idea that i was about to move mountains, the world and then again , these were always fifteenminute meditations, but when exactly did i set out to practice these morning rituals, Morning Hours dedicate specifically to myself, i recorded the screen, woke up, my phone was in sleep mode, i didnt put it away until this happened, that is, in fact i turned on the video screen recording, the meditation was playing. These 15 minutes , just me, this voice and my space, then beauty rituals, these are some very basic exercises, some very basic care, well, very much as it would seem, im even talking about it now, i want ask yourself the question, why arent we doing this now, what happened, who are we, oh it was great now, we we we are who . But we, i dont know, i always say this, yes, yes, yes, how many of you are super . A lot, as we see, well, great, it just may be that there is some kind of role, she is the leading one, so who are we . I dont know, its really difficult, i was discouraged, well, that is, as i understand it, there is marina, who is limply stuck in this endless stream of videos, yes, and there is a successful, collected, conscious marina, who woke up, and this is the answer , by the way, today, well, for now, excuse the background, but this is important. In general while i was on my way to the train back in st. Petersburg, i talked to my dad, and i explained the situation to him, that im going to shoot now, im very interested in it and i want to, but i need to temporarily skip work for 2 days, and i was so worried, thats how it is, how can i to allow this, although in general everyone treats it adequately, and i explain to him, i say, and i just scolded myself for this and was so anxious, and then it was like. well, as long as we can, were already 100 since we talked about it, you can allow yourself to do whatever you want, well, somehow so what a cool dad you have, yeah, but we really. There was a situation, again, connected with this superdependent person, and where we really rallied and started discussing all this, that is, they support me very much, and i told him you know, i just got a metaphor and this the answer to your question, i say, you know, i have a feeling that there is an adult marina, and there is a little marina, and a little marina, this is creating some kind of nonsense all the time, sometimes the adult catches a cold and says well, calm down, thats enough, that is, roughly speaking, she takes. By the hand, she doesnt even slap her on the head, by the way, its interesting, that is, she doesnt hit her there, doesnt scold her, its like everythings fine, lets go, this is it, if were talking about we , then most likely this is the answer, yes olga, i understand correctly that this is usually what they teach clients, yes yes, and marina herself seems to have this technique, yes, when i am an adult, i am a child, and there some special relationships are built to solve various problems, and you. This is a psychic podcast, all episodes of our please watch the podcast on the website of the First Channel 1tv. Ru. I really liked what you suggested to marina, i would like you and i , marin, to try to bring this to fruition. I made a decision for myself that i will not look at the phone screen for more than 10 minutes an hour, this is how my Success Story