Dec 12, 2020
Friends, I ain t never seed nothin lak hit an your humble reporter tore the seat outta my britches as I tried to straddle a barbed wire fence.
I m mad cause I ain t gonna be pressydint. I no Jim Wesley up c here at Science Hill and Ben Looney over c here in town voted fur me, but the Demmerkrats up in Warshinton didn t kount them votes. Jim, who ust to be with the health deepartment, wuz gonna be in charge uv ObommerKare an Ben wuz gonna ride shotgun in my limmerzene. He ust to be a park ranger an I noes he s got a double barrell.