there s this toxicity, this masculine idea what a man is that s out there that is just not correct and that s something that you really see when you re doing this and it s something i just want to push back on. how do you define masculinity? masculinity is loving your family, caring about your family and being there for your family and supporting them each and every way. no one would say i m not tough and no one would ever accuse me of not being there and sticking up for those that i love, but i also care about people and am compassionate, empathetic. we re kind of mixing up this concept that if somehow a man shows kindness or empathy or consideration for others, that s somehow not masculine and that is just not okay. that s just not true. a lesson emhoff says he learned growing up in new jersey from watching his father michael. he s just such a strong role model for me and he was a woman